I kissed her so hard she stumbled back. Not taking my lips away from hers, I backed her down the short hallway to my bedroom and didn’t stop until she fell back against the mattress.
“I won,” she giggled.
“Nope,” I rasped as I grabbed the side strings of her panties and yanked them off. “I won. Spread your legs for me, Patricia.” She did as she was told before I crawled on the bed and put both of her ankles on my shoulders. “So fucking sweet,” I growled before I flattened my tongue and gave her one long lick up her slit, swirling my tongue around her clit before I lost all control and devoured her. She squirmed against my lips and came in my mouth with a scream.
I made quick work of taking off my clothes, fishing a condom out of my wallet before I flung my jeans onto the floor. I rolled it on and met her eyes, silently asking one last time for permission with my raised brow.
She grabbed my ass and lifted her hips as she shot me a scowl. My little spitfire.
I’d always made it a point to not look past the right now when it came to women. I was never invested enough in anyone else to plan my future around them. As I moved inside PJ, I knew with a bone-deep certainty that she would always be the girl. The one etched in my brain so deep that I’d remember every single moment and create memories that would make me take pause. She divided time: there was now, before her, and after her.
“So perfect,” I rasped as I inched in deeper. “So, fucking perfect.”
She was perfect, wet and tight and made for me. I knew once I got inside her, there would be no way to stop. Forcing myself to go slow despite the aching need to get deeper, I dropped my head into the crook of her neck as we rocked together.
A rush of foreign feelings washed over me, the most powerful, permanence and crazy love so strong my chest pinched.
Because of her, I might lose a friend I’d thought of as a brother and make the man who’d treated me like a son, despise me. I hated it, but if I had to choose between them and PJ, between anyone and PJ, she’d win each and every time.
We kissed with our eyes open as I fought like hell to keep our rhythm slow, searching her gorgeous features for a wince or grimace since I knew my girl well enough to know she wouldn't utter a peep if I hurt her.
"Dylan, please." PJ cradled my face as she bucked her hips off the bed to get me deeper. "I won't break. Faster. Deeper. Give me all of you.”
I blinked at the sweat dripping into my eyes, shaking my head.
"Any faster, I won't last, sweet girl,” I grunted, my breaths quick and shallow, "and I'll hurt you.”
"You aren't hurting me. This feels incredible." She peppered sweet, tiny kisses along my jaw before delving her fingers into my hair. “You’re incredible,” she murmured against my lips. "I'm right where I've always wanted to be."
My heart pounded against my rib cage as I thrust hard. PJ gasped but smiled wide when her glossy eyes met mine. My hand quivered as I cupped her neck and kissed her, sloppy and desperate as if I'd never taste her lips again. If I hadn't realized it years ago, it became crystal clear tonight. I was fucked. This girl owned me, and she always would. Losing her, letting her go, would never happen. It couldn't. She was ingrained in my soul. I guessed there was such a thing as soul mates. I could live without a limb before I could live without my PJ.
"I love you. God, I love you so much,” I whispered in her ear as I moved harder and faster inside her.
Her nails dug into my back as I felt her pulsing around me.
“I'll never let you go. Never, you hear me?” I wove a fistful of her hair around my hand and pulled so she’d look at me. “Do you hear me, Patricia?”
She nodded as her mouth fell open on a silent scream. That's all it took for me to come hard inside her, pins and needles prickling down my leg as my convulsing body slumped against her. I eased out and smoothed the sticky wisps of hair from her forehead.
“Are you okay?” I whispered as I kissed her cheek. “Let me get a washcloth for—”
“Shhh.” She pressed her finger to my lips. “Let’s just stay here for a minute. No … taking care of that, no crazy fathers or pissed off brothers, just us. Can it just be like that?”
I lay on the bed beside her and pulled her to my chest. We were sweaty, exhausted, and happy—happier than I ever expected was possible.
“I’ll make sure it is.”
23
Danielle
“Not bad, right?” Jack cast me a glance over his shoulder mid squat.
It wasn’t bad at all. In fact, it was goddamn astounding. Once Jack was able to get back on his feet, he wouldn’t stop. In fact, at times, I had to kick him out of the therapy room. I was both overjoyed at his amazing progress and devastated.
It wouldn’t be long now. Jack was on his way out.
“Fishing for compliments gets you ten more squats, Taylor.” My quip drew a sexy laugh from Jack’s lips. Everything about Jack’s lips was sexy. I’d crossed the professional and moral line I swore I wouldn’t, and all I thought about was doing it again.
We hadn’t kissed since that one night. I’d made up a ridiculous excuse about an off-site patient I had to see after hours to excuse myself from our usual cafeteria dates, but I was nearing my third day of the dopey white lie. Nothing physical had happened between us since my one glorious lapse in judgment, but the memory of our kisses was enough to shift our entire dynamic. Our gazes would stumble together and linger for a few awkward moments too long: a wink, a jolt of electricity when I’d adjust his leg for an exercise or massage it after we were done. Functional contact became … sensual. The crackling of embers between us made it hard to breathe.
Jack lay back on the table after we were done, a hint of a smile tilting his mouth. As he progressed, his attitude shifted. When he’d first arrived, he’d tried to cover up his vulnerability with a smart-ass remark, but it had been impossible to miss. Now, he was taking steps toward his old life and who he used to be. He wouldn’t need me anymore, and I loathed how much the thought stung.
I pushed the fabric of his sweatpants up over his knee, my greedy hands inching up the fabric so I could keep my fingertips on his skin for an extra second or two. I hoped he didn’t notice, but his sharp intake of breath told me otherwise. Scooping up a handful of lotion, I worked it up and down his leg, from knee to calf, as I’d always done. Despite myself, sometimes my eyes would travel to the bulge between his legs.
I peered up at him, making sure to skip over his torso this time. Jack’s hand rested behind his head as he focused on me. His crystal blue eyes filled with lust as he searched my face.
“Do you have that patient again after work?” he croaked out in a rasp. It was as if our session was some kind of foreplay, and the thought sickened me as much as it turned me on. I wanted to kiss Jack again more than I wanted air. “Can you meet me tonight?”
Say no, Danielle. You’re only stretching out the heartache and delaying the inevitable.
“Still have the Peanut Butter M&Ms?” My voice dipped to a seductive whisper, the words coming out of my mouth having no connection to what was echoing in my head.
His lips curved in a sexy, slow smile. “Just for you.”
Just for me. I wanted Jack to be just for me, and even though I knew he wasn’t, the temptation to pretend for just a little while longer was impossible to resist.
Along with professionalism and any semblance of moral conduct, self-preservation also flew right out the window when it came to whatever it was between Jack and me, but I couldn’t stop.
The center was a ghost town and I seemed to be the only therapist left. That wasn’t completely unusual, but it didn’t usually happen this early. Jack wouldn’t expect me for another half hour, so I headed to the therapy room to kill time. I had an early session with a new patient and thought setting up the room would work off my nervous energy. Right before I inserted the key in the lock, long fingers wrapped around my elbow. I let out a tiny shriek before a hand covered my mouth.
“Shh,�
� Jack whispered, mischief dancing across his features. He peeked over my shoulder and walked me backward until I found myself in our supply closet.
“Jack, are you crazy?” My heart raced as the panic and lust pumping through my veins strangled the words in my throat.
“Do you have the key?” He nodded to the large ring of a dozen keys around my hand.
“Yes, it locks from both the inside and outside. What the hell do you think you’re—”
In less than five seconds, he shut and locked the door behind us, pinning me against the shelves with a passionate kiss. This was much different than what we’d shared on the bench outside. This was a kiss filled with hunger—insistent, all consuming, and mind-erasing starvation. My head spun, and my panties were soaked. All coherent thoughts left my head with the click of the lock.
“Jack,” I panted when he tore his lips from mine to drag them down my throat. “We can’t do this here.” My actions disagreed with my words, as in between Jack and we can’t, I’d threaded my fingers into his hair and let my head fall back. The scrape of his stubble chafed my skin, and I wanted more. I wanted my body raw from Jack’s mouth and hands, and for a few brief moments, I let myself think we had a chance. That we could have a life together full of all this passion and need.
Why was I talking myself out of this? Why couldn’t we? This felt too good—he felt too good—for all of this to be wrong.
“The way you kiss …” Jack hissed. His hooded eyes met mine when he pulled the rubber band holding my ponytail from my hair and weaved his fingers through my tangled strands, grabbing a fistful before he pulled me closer. “It’s all I think about. I know I’m almost out of here, but I don’t want this to end. Tell me it won’t.” Need dripped off every word, and the only reply I could muster was a shake of my head.
His smile widened before he brushed my lips again. I relaxed into his arms before I flung my arms around his neck, giving more to this kiss than I had before, than I had in years. I couldn’t identify the burn in my belly as our lips kept moving. It was a spark of something. Hope? Excitement? Both were foreign feelings to me, but the wonder of it all washed over me. Jack’s breathless kiss brought the air back into my lungs.
“Who keeps stealing the frigging tape—oh my God!” Leanne bellowed behind us before we jerked apart.
“I am so sorry, I thought I was the only one left. You … can just …” She shielded her eyes as a blush filled her cheeks. I groaned after her quick departure.
“What are you doing to me, Taylor?” I met his cheeky grin with a glare. “All my judgment goes out the window with you.”
He choked out a laugh as he ran his hands up and down my arms. “You’re beautiful when you let go, Dani.” Jack cupped my chin, and goose bumps covered my entire body. Tiny hairs on the back of my neck stood up as I registered the longing in his gaze. Jack looked at me as if I was everything he’d ever wanted. I tried to remember the last time a man regarded me with such yearning and reverence.
Not since … never. Even when things were good with Cliff, or when I thought they were good, he never gazed at me with such pure want, as if his eyes didn’t need to seek anything else but me. My breathing faltered as my knees melted into jelly.
“I can’t wait to see more. Maybe skip the cafeteria tonight.” Jack’s hands slid down my back, grazing my ass enough to make me jump in his arms. “What we had in here was sweeter than candy, anyway.” His eyebrows jumped, and I swatted his chest.
“Lay off the lines, Taylor.” I grabbed his hand and opened the door, scanning the hallway before pulling him out.
“See you tomorrow.” I pressed a close-mouthed, long kiss on his lips, shocking the shit out of both of us.
“You know it, boss.” He kissed me again, biting my bottom lip before turning to walk down the hallway. As my heartbeat quieted in my chest, I noticed the absence of his crutch as he made his way down the hall. I let out a long sigh at the realization. If he walked that well unassisted, it was time to start the discharge process.
I wandered back to my office in a daze. Confused, embarrassed, and totally without a fucking clue what to do next. Settling on damage control, I knocked on Leanne’s office door, wincing when she told me to come in.
I settled into a chair in front of her desk and scrambled for an explanation. Since I was caught kissing my patient in a closet, I didn’t have one.
“I’m … sorry you saw that.” I dragged my hand down my face, unable to make eye contact. Leanne and I were friends, as much as I allowed myself to have a friend these days. Since Cliff, I never let anyone in—friends or family. This was why this thing with Jack had confused the shit out of me. All I’d wanted was to be alone, but I couldn’t stay away from him. As much as I’d denied it for so long, I wanted him. I wanted us, even though I had no clue how it could ever work once he was discharged.
God, I was so screwed.
Leanne leaned forward, resting her elbows on the desk as her warm gaze met mine.
“Do you think you’re the first one to make out in that closet? Please, you aren’t the only one here who stays late at times.”
I let out a nervous laugh, still unnerved from being caught but relieved that there were no consequences—for now.
“I won’t say a word,” she whispered with an easy and sincere smile.
“I knew Jack … before. He was my brother’s friend before we moved. But this is beyond unethical.” I cupped my forehead as my eyes squeezed shut for a moment. My lips burned from our kiss, and I could still taste Jack, still feel him against me.
Leanne shrugged. “I was actually glad to see that. I mean, sure groping patients is frowned upon, but, you keep yourself so closed off. It’s nice to see you happy.”
“Happy?” I scoffed. “I’m a mess. An unprofessional mess.”
“Maybe.” She chuckled when I was able to finally meet her gaze. “But you haven’t stopped smiling since you sat down. Your secret is safe with me.”
“Thank you,” I breathed out before leaving her office.
Grabbing my stuff from my office, I rushed out into the parking lot to head home. Despite the humiliation of just being caught, the temptation of visiting Jack in his room was an intrusive and overpowering impulse.
He gave me something to look forward to, and maybe that didn’t have to end after all.
Maybe I could be happy, if only I could stop being terrified.
24
PJ
DYLAN: Nervous?
ME: Nope. Terrified.
DYLAN: Stop, you teach art every day.
ME: Kids. Not adults.
DYLAN: So? You’ve assisted in those classes for a while now. You’re a talented artist. Tonight will be cake. I promise.
Tonight would be the first time I was teaching an art class by myself. Granted, these weren’t “serious” students, as the evening classes had a “paint and drink” theme, and I was used to helping anyone who had trouble figuring out direction, but up there, alone, leading the class, that was frightening as hell.
ME: I’d rather be with you. I hate when you work night jobs.
Dylan sometimes worked night jobs with his crew. They were the only nights we were apart.
DYLAN: Believe me, I’d rather be with you, too. Know what I was thinking about?
ME: Nope, what?
DYLAN: When you come, do you know your right leg shakes? Like on its own; you couldn’t fake it if you tried. It’s like a live wire running through that amazing body I can’t keep my hands off of. I’m hard just thinking about it. About you. Wait until tomorrow night, I’ll make you come so hard you won’t even feel your legs.
The class was starting to fill up and there was nothing I could do to dull the ache that now bloomed between my thighs that this annoying bastard had given me via a frigging text message.
ME: What the hell is the matter with you? What am I supposed to do with that now?
DYLAN: Are you nervous anymore?
ME: You know what … no. At lea
st, not as much. You think you’re so smart, don’t you?
DYLAN: I know I am. And I meant every single word, so you’d better get some sleep tonight. I love you, baby. You’re brilliant, and you’ll be fine.
ME: I love you, too. Here goes nothing.
“All right, kiddo. This is all you.” My friend and boss, Beth, nudged me on the shoulder. She was only in her late twenties and owned and managed the studio herself. In the year I’d worked for her, she’d become a close friend. She made me believe that art could change the world and showed me how to find inspiration in every little thing around us. I admired the hell out of her, but thought she was bat shit crazy for giving me an entire class to teach.
“Listen, I wouldn’t leave you here unless I had complete faith in you.” She clutched my shoulders. “And, if for some reason, it gets tough, have Ryan serve them an extra round of wine on the house. They won’t give two shits about what they’re painting.” She winked and kissed my cheek before breezing out the door.
I queued up the TV screen to the sunset painting for tonight. I’d been painting sunsets since before I could read, so maybe Dylan was right, and this would be easier than I thought. Scanning the room, it was a small turnout but the typical crowd I was used to. A couple on a date, a few girls laughing with their friends, and a tall, broad-shouldered man all the way in the back with an FDNY T-shirt stretching over his inked arms. My dad gave me a little wave when our eyes met and I couldn’t help but laugh.
The next hour flew by. I quickly shook off my nerves and got lost in the masterpiece as I always did. Art always soothed me like nothing else, and by the end of the class, I had to admit it really was cake once I’d gotten started.
Trudging up to my surprise student at the end of class, I hooked my arm around his neck and kissed his cheek. I was standing and he was sitting, and he was still two heads taller than I was.
“Since when do you take painting classes?” I asked.
Think Twice Page 13