ME: I’m almost out of here. All your violations will be sweet memories soon.
DANIELLE: Sweet memories?
ME: That’s what I’m calling tasting your lips while you grabbed my ass. Sweet as sugar.
DANIELLE: I didn’t … oh God, I did.
I laughed, picturing that flustered crease in her forehead after I riled her up. If only she’d just let go of whatever held her back. We’d be amazing together. We were amazing together. She saw it too, but I could tell it scared the shit out of her.
ME: Anyway, to answer your question, I did 50 squats and 50 steps during and after my session. My quads are like rocks today.
DANIELLE: Oh, I know that.
ME: Are you admitting to checking me out during therapy? I think that’s another one of those violations.
DANIELLE: I meant I know you wore yourself out in therapy today.
ME: Nah, I think you’re flirting with me.
DANIELLE: You’re exhausting and relentless.
ME: And you’re beautiful and amazing.
DANIELLE: Jack …
Another long silence. I hated that I couldn’t see her face. For someone so rigid, her chocolate eyes put every emotion on display.
DANIELLE: It’s been a long time since I considered someone a possibility. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
My gut burned thinking of whoever hurt her so much that she thought alone was the only way to be. I’d change that, if only she’d give me a chance.
ME: You knew what you were doing in the closet. And on the bench …
DANIELLE: Okay, enough.
ME: You taught me how to get back on my feet. After I leave, maybe I can show you too. In a different way. An awesome way. All you have to say is yes.
Another long silence followed. Three dots started then stopped, then started again.
DANIELLE: Kit Kats tomorrow?
I exhaled an excited gust of air. It wasn’t a yes—yet. But, it also wasn’t a no. I reveled in the possibility.
ME: Perfect. Sweet dreams, beautiful.
DANIELLE: You’re going to be the death of me, Taylor. Goodnight.
I found her use of death amusing. Whether or not Danielle would admit it, we’d brought each other back to life.
When I did walk out of here, I wanted it to be toward new beginnings, and Danielle wouldn’t be another end.
27
Dylan
“What’s with the dopey smile?” My mother slipped me a curious glance as she settled into a seat across from me.
“Dopey? Is that any way to speak to your only son? The one you kept waiting at the restaurant for fifteen minutes?” I faked a scowl before rising from my seat to kiss her cheek.
We always had lunch together on Thursdays, but she’d been at their house in Florida until the end of July, and I’d bailed on her the last few weeks. My mother had seen right through me ever since I was a kid, and I wasn’t ready to tell her yet. I wasn’t ashamed of PJ and me. In fact, not being able to yell about us from the rooftops was eating away at me, but my mother was best friends with PJ’s mother, Ellie. I would not only be putting her in an awful position by swearing her to secrecy, but she also saw PJ as a little girl. I hoped my own mother wouldn’t view me as a creeper, but I delayed crossing that bridge as long as I could.
“You know how hard it is to find parking, and you kept me waiting for weeks, my darling boy. You’re keeping something from me, but that’s okay.” She lifted her menu, still affording me a good piece of her stink eye from behind it. “I’ll find out eventually. Always do.”
I let out a long sigh and rested my elbows on the table. “Fine. I’m ... seeing someone.”
The menu plopped out of her hands before she gaped at me.
“Who? When?” She scooted to the edge of her seat, her eyes bugged out as she gaped at me. “Oh God, not Jeannine again. I mean, if it’s her, I’m ... happy for you.” She winced, her silent plea for me to tell her she was wrong.
I burst out laughing. “No, you’re not. Nice attempt to backtrack. But no, it’s not her. But it’s ... someone else you know.” I swallowed and leaned back in my seat.
“Someone else I know? Do I know them well?”
I folded my arms and nodded. Her eyes fluttered, probably from the parade of female possibilities traipsing through her brain.
She rested her head on her wrist and searched my gaze. “Is it serious?”
“I’m in love with her.” I nodded with a goofy grin splitting my lips. “She’s it for me. I’ve never been more sure of anything. So yeah, maybe my smile is a little dopey.” I smiled around the rim of my water glass and took a sip. My mother’s eyes were lit up like the seven-foot Christmas tree she still made my stepfather buy every year. My stomach turned, knowing once she found out who the girl was, her gaze would burn more than shine.
“Hey, Bianca! I thought that was you!” I cringed at Ellie’s voice before turning around.
“Oh! Hey, Dylan,” she breathed before planting a quick kiss on my cheek. “I’m meeting my sister for lunch today, and, of course, she’s late. We’re supposed to head up to visit Jack after lunch, so I wish she’d get a move on.” Ellie tsked and glanced at her watch. She was tiny and beautiful like her daughter and just as feisty if you crossed her. Before our stepfathers had come along, the four of us had traveled everywhere together, our mothers tough enough for us to not miss the gaping absence of fathers. Jack’s father had died, but mine was a deadbeat who’d never grown up. Our mothers did both jobs for years, and I had nothing but a ton of admiration for both of them.
A rush of shame flooded my veins when I realized once Ellie found out about her daughter and me, maybe she wouldn’t hate me as much as Nick would, but she’d probably never look at me the same way.
“How’s Jack doing?” My mother grabbed Ellie’s forearm.
“He’s fine. Thank God. He should be home soon. It’s the little one that’s giving us trouble.” She raised a brow at my mother, and I did my best to appear stoic and unaffected, as I was the main cause of the trouble.
“PJ?” Mom straightened in her seat. “What’s wrong? I thought she was staying here to go to school?”
Ellie let out an audible sigh. “She is. But she’s tight-lipped on what really made her change her mind. And she is never home.” Ellie scoffed and crossed her arms. “I see her at school during the summer program classes, but that’s it. It’s like she’s got this big secret she’s afraid to spill so she won’t speak. Even her brother has no clue, and she usually tells him everything. She’s eighteen, so not much Nick or I can do. I’m hopeful she’ll come around and tell us soon. Her father is losing his mind as you can imagine. He thinks she has a secret boyfriend.”
My mother drew back in her chair as Ellie laughed, nodding at her friend but glowering at me. My mother should have been a private detective instead of an office manager. She sniffed things out in seconds.
“Do you think she does?” My mother’s words were slow, but Ellie didn’t seem fazed.
“She may, but I would hope she’d be able to tell me. Her father wouldn’t take that well, at all, so I understand her not wanting to say anything to him.” Ellie scanned the room and raised her hand. “Kate, over here. I’ll let you get back to lunch.” Ellie gave me a half smile as she leaned in toward my mother. “Your son is such a sweet boy to take his mother to lunch. Mine tells me I’m hovering all the time.” She gave us a quick wave goodbye before rushing to the front of the restaurant.
“Yes,” she answered Ellie while leveling her eyes on me. “Such a sweet boy indeed.”
Mom scooted her chair toward me when Ellie was out of ear shot.
“How long? Do we need to get a lawyer?”
I flinched before my jaw dropped. “Lawyer? Mom, what the hell—”
“Nick will come after you when he finds out. She only recently turned eighteen, and if you’re telling me she’s the one, I’m guessing it’s been going on for a while.”
“It
hasn’t. I’ve loved her for a long time, but I didn’t touch her until she turned eighteen. I swear, Mom.”
She rested her elbows on the table, taking in a long breath before bringing her eyes back to mine. “If you think you love her, you better be sure.”
“I am sure. I’m sorry about putting you in this position.” My eyes drifted to where Ellie sat with her sister. “You and Ellie—”
“Ellie knows you well enough to know the type of guy you are. She may not be thrilled about the age difference, but she’d know you’d never hurt anyone—especially PJ. Her brother isn’t going to like this.”
“He knows.”
Her eyebrows jumped. “Jack knows about you and his baby sister? How did he react?”
“He’s … not happy, but I think when we talked, I brought him over to our side. He just wants us to tell their parents before they catch us.”
She nodded slowly. “That would be a disaster of epic proportions. It’s great that our families are so close but it also …complicates things. Permanently. No matter if you stay together or not.”
“There is no ‘or not,’ Mom.” I stiffened, agitated at the thought. “I told you she’s it for me, and I meant it.”
She brought her hand to her lips as a slow smile lifted her cheeks. “I’m happy for you, sweetheart. Truly, I am. But, I worry. If you don’t play this right, this is going to blow up in both your faces. You need to tell her parents. Like in the next day. Got me?”
My eyes dropped to the table. “I got you.” I wanted to tell her that it was much easier in theory. PJ wasn’t a minor, but I knew her hesitation in telling her parents was her fear of Nick’s reaction and of disappointing him. Mom was right, if we didn’t play this right, it would be an epic disaster. Losing PJ wasn’t something I could think about for more than a minute without wanting to punch a hole in the wall and scream.
“The greatest loves are the messiest ones. And you and PJ? Mess doesn’t even scratch the surface.”
I coughed out a laugh but still wouldn’t look up.
Mom cupped my chin and lifted my head until I met her gaze. “If you love her, love her out in the open. Face the chief, and deal with whatever the aftermath is. I’ll stick by you through all of it.” Her easy smile lifted the brick off my chest. One of the bricks, anyway.
I leaned over to kiss her cheek. “Thank you.” My shoulders sagged from the relief washing over me.
“You’re my son.” She cradled my cheek. “Where else would I be? Where else have I been?” We shared the same sad smile. She’d never been anywhere but with me for my entire life.
“But, don’t be careless.” She pointed her index finger at me. “Do it now, before a great love turns into a miserable heartbreak.”
28
PJ
“When do Mom and Dad get back from the Poconos?” my brother asked over the phone as I curled up on top of my bed.
I reveled in my solitude but hated being in the house all by myself at night. I heard every creak, bang, and breeze. They all sounded ominous and terrifying. When I was little, Jack used to sit on the edge of my bed and explain every noise, every time. He did this well into my teenage years, and now that he wasn’t here, it was impossible to relax.
“Tomorrow night. Late, I think.” Even though it was August, I had piled on two blankets for extra protection. Which was silly as a serial killer or mass murderer could just lift the blankets to kill me, but I kept them on anyway.
“Dylan isn’t there?” His voice had an edge I didn’t care for but wouldn’t address as I buried myself under the blankets to stay alive.
“No, Jack. He’s working tonight.”
“I figured he’d be there or you’d be at his place. Although, the less you do in the house until you tell them, the better.”
“I know that. I would have told Dad the other day if he hadn’t joked that the only way he’d approve of me dating one of your friends was if he were dead.”
My brother whistled on the other end of the line. “I’d laugh if it wasn’t …” He trailed off.
“True? Yeah, me too.”
“I worry about you. Both of you actually. I have the bad feeling shit is going to implode soon.”
“I’ve had that feeling all summer.” A humorless laugh bubbled from my chest. “I love him, Jack. We love each other. I know you think I’m just a kid, and I don’t know any better, but—”
“I think you’re too smart for your own good. It’s the big, mushy heart that concerns me.” I heard the smirk in my brother’s voice.
“I’m fine, Jack.” I rolled my eyes, but a smile snuck up on me.
“I’ll let you go to sleep, Peege. Remember what I always told you about the house at night when you were little?”
“That it’s the same house as during the day with the same noises.”
“Right, and what else did I always say?”
My eyes welled. I’d been terrified of disappointing my family when they all found out about Dylan and me. Jack finally knew, and although he wasn’t exactly thrilled, he supported us. I loved my brother and wished he was here instead of an hour away. My big, mushy heart did give me a lot of problems.
“That you’d never let anything happen to me because you loved me biggest and best.” My voice cracked as an errant tear slipped down my cheek.
“And I still do. And I still won’t. Make sure the door is locked, and go to sleep.”
“I love you, too.” I sighed before I ended the call and curled up under the covers. Right before I was almost able to shut my eyes, the doorbell rang and scared the living daylights out of me.
I shot up from the bed in a panic. Who would be here at eleven o’clock at night? Grabbing my phone in case I had to punch out a call to 911, I almost leaped out of my skin again, when the phone vibrated in my hand.
DYLAN: It’s just me, baby. I should have texted before I rang the bell.
ME: You think? On my way.
I let out a long sigh of relief before I rushed to the door.
“What are you doing here?” I asked Dylan before I buried my head into his chest. “I thought you had to work.”
I pulled him inside and flicked on the hallway light. He was in worn jeans and a damp white T-shirt that clung to every muscle in his torso. He was dirty and sweaty and delicious. Made me forget how only two seconds ago I thought I was about to meet my demise.
“I left a couple of hours early. I know how you hate to be home alone at night.”
I lifted my head. “How do you know that? My brother told you, right?”
He shook his head and snaked his arm around my waist. “I slept here one night a long time ago when your parents had to rush out and left you with Jack and me. You slept at the foot of his bed because you were too terrified to go in your own bedroom.” He kissed my forehead and I leaned in. “Jack may have mentioned once that you still hated being alone, so I finished up as quickly as I could and let the guys handle the rest.” He cradled my face and brushed my lips with his. “I’ll stay until you fall asleep.”
I reached up to squeeze his wrists. “Why can’t you stay all night? My parents aren’t home until late tomorrow night.” I jutted my lip in a pout before I kissed Dylan’s jaw. “Sleep with me.”
A growl erupted from Dylan’s throat. “I’d love to, but I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why? My parents are four hours away and not coming home until tomorrow.” My hands drifted down his shirt, while my mouth salivated to lick the sweat glistening off his neck. “My bed is a little small though; I’d have to sleep on top of you most of the night.” I lifted my eyes to Dylan’s, now a deep shade of feral brown.
“You play so dirty, Patricia,” he rasped before drifting his finger across my bottom lip.
“I could if you stayed.”
He groaned and dropped his chin to the top of my head.
“Fine. You win, as usual. I’ll take a quick shower and crawl in. You’re sure they won’t be home until—”
“Tomorrow night,” I murmured against his lips. “I’ll wait for you in my room.” I sauntered down the hallway, making sure to give my ass an extra sway knowing Dylan’s eyes were glued to my every movement. I came into my room and threw off the covers before I climbed into bed.
I thought the relief would finally put me to sleep, but the creak of the faucet and hiss of the water from the shower popped my eyes right open. I’d seen Dylan covered in sweat but not dripping from the shower. How bad would it be if I took a tiny peek? Not like I hadn’t seen him naked a ton of times, right?
Sneaking out of my room and inching the bathroom door open, I gaped at my boyfriend through the almost transparent shower curtain. Even through a blurry piece of fabric, I could make out the sinew of his muscular arms as he raised them over his head to rinse his hair. My eyes fell to the firm curve of his ass as he turned around. God, he was beautiful. And he was mine. What was this life?
The curtain opened and I jumped out of my skin as it screeched against the rail.
“Are you watching or coming in?” Dylan quirked a brow before crooking his finger. My nightshirt was peeled off and my underwear flung across the bathroom floor in seconds.
“So greedy,” he rasped before lifting me up and pinning me against the cold tile of the shower wall. “Is this what you want?” His tongue flicked the seam of my lips and I whimpered. “You want to be wet and naked with me?”
“Yes.” The word fell from my lips in a needy whisper. “I want … Dylan.” His lips trailed across my chest and wrapped around an already rigid nipple. One arm snaked around my waist while his other hand drifted up my thigh and between my legs. His calloused thumb circled my clit, making me cry out as his entire body writhed against me.
“That’s my girl. Dripping wet everywhere. For me. I want to be so deep inside you, right now.”
“Then do it!” I whimpered and palmed the weight of his cock. “Please,” I begged as I tried to guide him inside. He placed me back down and shook his head.
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