When the Goddess Wakes

by Howard Andrew Jones

  “Damnit.” She’d thought the Goddess would have to come at least as near as the bottom of the slope to get the stone. “I was hoping she’d come close enough to talk.”

  The hearthstone struck the Goddess’ chest with a bright flash of light.

  She continued to float directly toward them.

  “Well, you’re in luck then,” Kyrkenall said. “Because here she comes.”

  18

  The Other Way

  Tesra watched the shambling, awkward run of the ko’aye bearing Rylin and Thelar, astonished that such graceful creatures were so clumsy on the ground.

  Once in the air they transformed almost immediately from ungainly feathered reptiles to lithe and lovely predators. She admired them as they retreated into a cerulean sky.

  The audience who’d gathered to see them off retreated to the fortress, talking among themselves. Tesra, who didn’t properly belong to any of the groups, waited to one side for them to precede her. M’vai passed, in close conversation with N’lahr. Neither paid her any notice.

  Tesra still couldn’t reconcile the loving organization of which she’d thought she’d been a part with the secretive cult that had imprisoned General N’lahr and murdered noble Asrahn. It didn’t help that she had grown suspicious of her own emotions, memories, and judgment. She had been angry with Meria and M’vai for betraying that organization. Now she mourned for the kinder of the two sisters and envied the intense survivor for being trusted and valued by those the auxiliary had betrayed.

  “Are you wondering what they’re talking about?”

  Cerai had come up behind her so quietly Tesra flinched in surprise.

  The others had disappeared into the gloom of the fortress. Cerai waved away a servant who poked out his handsome head to give her an inquiring look. She continued as though Tesra had answered in the affirmative, sounding and looking composed and cool, if tired. “N’lahr has been infected with order. I’m sure you’ve noticed. And M’vai’s increasingly worried about him. But there’s nothing to be done.”

  Tesra had seen the commander’s strange symptoms as well as his peculiar energy matrix, though she struggled to make sense of the description Cerai had provided. She repeated it slowly. “Infected with order?”

  Cerai smiled thinly. Because the older woman had visited the queen and the exalts infrequently, Tesra had never known her well, though she had always admired her. Master of her own fate, Cerai would slip into and out of Darassus whenever she pleased and seemed to be the only alten whom both the queen and Synahla completely respected, though in recent months both had grown suspicious of her. Tesra inferred that the Altenerai had the same misgivings about her, for Cerai had apparently been playing her own canny little game for years, preparing for a crisis neither side had fully understood.

  “Didn’t you notice it happening to the queen?” Cerai asked.

  That question pulled Tesra up short. She had never thought of the change in the queen’s personality as an infection. “The queen did change,” she said. “But I thought that was just because she was growing more powerful. I don’t know N’lahr at all, so—”

  Cerai didn’t wait for her to finish. “You probably weren’t examining the queen closely through the inner world, were you?”

  “No,” Tesra said. One simply didn’t do that. Scrutinizing a fellow spell caster was impolite, although not entirely avoidable if you happened to be working spells together. “What happened to N’lahr?”

  “Well, several things. I’m sure you knew he was trapped inside a hearthstone for something close to seven years?”

  She’d heard only that he’d been imprisoned. This information astounded her. “How could he fit in a hearthstone?”

  “You really didn’t know? I thought you were highly placed.”

  “Not that high, apparently,” she said.

  “Interesting. Well, N’lahr told me he was trapped within the defensive reaction of a hearthstone. A kind of stasis. It left its mark on him, and the mark is getting stronger. Apparently he was also attacked by the queen during the battle. Did you see that?”

  Tesra shook her head, no. Once again she felt woefully underinformed and overmatched.

  “Battlefields are chaotic,” Cerai allowed. “As to N’lahr, unless something’s done he’s going to end up looking very much like one of the creatures stored in my menagerie. Fairly soon.” Cerai didn’t sound entirely unmoved by his circumstance, but she was far from distraught.

  It was horrifying to contemplate the loss of the savior of Darassus and the five realms. “Have you told him how much danger he’s in?”

  “I think he knows.”

  “If something happens to him, what will we do if the Goddess attacks again?”

  Cerai’s look at her was one of disappointment. “I don’t think a sword, even Irion, is much use against the Goddess. N’lahr is nearly useless in the battle to come.”

  “But that doesn’t mean you won’t help him, does it?”

  Cerai laughed softly. “Isn’t it your queen who had him frozen?”

  Tesra didn’t understand why Cerai seemed to think the situation funny. “I didn’t know about that,” she said. “She shouldn’t have done it.”

  “She could probably tell you were a sentimentalist. I have a small amount of sentiment left myself. For old time’s sake I suppose I should examine him. Maybe you’ll help me.”

  “Of course.”

  “But that’s not what I wanted to speak to you about,” Cerai said.

  “Oh?” N’lahr’s health certainly seemed important to Tesra, but perhaps Alten Cerai was more worried about the Goddess.

  “We’re in an interesting predicament. While I would certainly like to have the spirits and weapon I dispatched Rylin and Kyrkenall to find, I don’t plan to wait around for someone to come save me. A woman has to make her own way and plan ahead. Do you plan ahead, Tesra?”

  “I’m not sure what to plan for anymore.”

  Cerai put a hand to her arm. “Then plan with me. I can use someone of your skills.”

  Nothing seemed to trouble Cerai, and Tesra envied the alten’s self-assurance. While she demonstrated a similar arrogance to the queen and Synahla, Cerai possessed more awareness than either, and a dark irreverence that was oddly appealing. “What do you want to do?”

  “First? I’ve changed my mind. Let’s follow your suggestion and go look at my old friend N’lahr.” Cerai patted her arm, then headed through the open doorway into the fortress.

  They found N’lahr and M’vai in a reception room with a tiled waterway swimming with decorative fish. The two sat in a furniture grouping through which the water flowed. The young redhead had always been the more serious of the two sisters. Recent events appeared to have aged her, for her eyes and mouth lines and furrows in her brow were more pronounced as she studied N’lahr, seated on the couch across from her.

  As for the Altenerai commander, his plain, gaunt features revealed little of his inner thoughts.

  Cerai stopped near N’lahr. “I know you’re getting sicker. Are other symptoms manifesting?”

  M’vai watched suspiciously, but N’lahr answered without hesitation.

  “I lose track of moments. Observers tell me I freeze up.” He lifted his arm. “Sometimes my body responds slowly or gracelessly.”

  “So nothing I haven’t seen from you already,” Cerai said. “If you’d like, I can examine you. I have some experience in understanding how living structures are assembled.”

  “I’ve heard,” N’lahr said.

  “Just stand still, then. I’ll study you a bit.”

  M’vai’s brow furrowed more deeply.

  Cerai spoke to the commander in a quiet, thoughtful way. “I’d say that you’re unusually quiet, but that’s not really accurate, is it? What I mean to say is that you’re silent and yet have something on your mind.”

  N’lahr held himself still, as though posing for a painter’s brush. “There are a lot of things to worry about.”


  “Indeed there are,” Cerai said. “And I know I’m one of them. I’m no fool.”

  “I never thought you were.”

  “But I know how your mind works. You’re direct. Uncompromising.”

  “I’d say that’s fair.”

  Cerai’s eyes held that slightly glazed, absent quality of someone staring into the inner world.

  Deciding it would not be rude to do so, Tesra studied the commander through the inner world herself, finding the structural features typical of a living human body, registering as bright reds and golds. But a silvery latticework existed in parallel to the skeletal structures and energy lines, reminiscent of the matrices within hearthstones. She’d never seen another living object embedded with the like. More troubling was that new threads were growing on the latticework even as she watched.

  She looked at Cerai to gauge her reaction, and discovered the mage’s body had something strange within it as well. All of Cerai’s life threads glowed with excess energy.

  Cerai eyed N’lahr, and spoke to him, sounding faintly amused. “I know you don’t trust me.”

  “I don’t fully understand some of your actions,” N’lahr admitted.

  “You wonder why I didn’t try to stop the queen.”

  “More specifically I wonder why you didn’t inform the rest of the Altenerai about the queen’s plans. Actions could have been taken to save lives.”

  “I judged we Altenerai wouldn’t be effective, and it was better to make alternative preparations. Surely you understand that. A commander has to pick her battles and protect her resources.”

  “What’s my condition?”

  “You’ve no comment?” Cerai asked. “I take it that means you remain uncertain of me.”

  Though the mage clearly wished to pretend they were engaged in playful banter, N’lahr appeared deadly serious. “Very well, Cerai. Given that the hearthstones twisted our queen and one of the kindest and most skilled of the Altenerai, Belahn, I think you should rightly be concerned they might have altered your own judgment.”

  “Oh, my judgment has changed,” Cerai said. “But go on.”

  “You excuse actions that would once have been anathema to you. You were willing to assist Alantris only so long as you could access the keystone, which you thought more important than the people of the city you were sworn to protect.”

  “How can I protect the people if the realms are slated for destruction?” Cerai shook her head. “The hearthstones allow me to see further than others. My judgment is different, but it’s not deluded. I know what I can achieve. And surely you recognize that if I had not made these preparations, if I had not reached out to save you, you would already be dead.”

  “I do see that.”

  “And yet you still distrust me.”

  “Are you going to tell him his prognosis, or not?” M’vai asked.

  Cerai glanced at her with mild annoyance “Your guardian grows impatient, N’lahr. As to her point, you are infected with order, and it’s rooting ever more deeply. I think your condition’s accelerating.”

  “How quickly?” N’lahr asked.

  “I can’t know that unless I look at you again in a few hours.”

  “And the final result?”

  “Probably what you fear. I think you will become a statue. One permanently suspended between life and death.”

  The commander nodded once, as if she had merely confirmed his suspicion.

  Tesra felt as though her heart had dropped away. M’vai pressed hands to the sides of her head as though she couldn’t stand to hear much more.

  “You’ve identified the problem,” N’lahr said. “Can anything be done?”

  “I can attempt to remove these extra threads.”

  “How dangerous is that?”

  “This is hearthstone magic, and interfering with it can provoke a reaction. It varies from stone to stone, and I don’t know how my efforts will interact with your body.”

  “I’ve experienced and witnessed some of those hearthstone reactions,” N’lahr said with grim resolve. “Very well. Look at me again in an hour. If the advancement has accelerated, we may have to risk action.”

  “Of course. I’m happy to help.”

  “Thank you. Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s something I must do.”

  Cerai gestured for him to exit, then turned to M’vai. “I know you’ve appointed yourself his caretaker. Why don’t you keep an eye on him? There’s something I want to show Tesra.”

  M’vai glumly nodded agreement, and then Tesra followed Cerai to a cozy office on the third floor. It had a secondary door along one wall, across from a bookshelf-lined fireplace. A window looked down upon the courtyard.

  Cerai crossed to the desk, the room’s central feature, and took a seat in a plush chair. Behind her, just under the window, a shelf unit of mixed cabinet doors and open shelves displayed pieces of turquoise Arappan pottery and five small crystals that were almost certainly memory stones.

  Tesra sat on the wooden bench beside the main door and waited to see what Cerai had in mind.

  “This morning, Anzat was sitting there. Do you know what he offered me?”

  “Did he propose?”

  Cerai laughed. “No. He offered me not just his soldiers, but his soldiers in Darassus. As if I wanted to bring through a few hundred more Naor.”

  “He’s trying to turn you against the Altenerai?” Tesra asked.

  “He said I couldn’t trust them. As if I didn’t know that, and as if he thought I would trust him.”

  Tesra wasn’t sure what to say, so she nodded politely.

  “He’s right about one thing, though. I really don’t have anyone I can trust. The Altenerai are too limited to understand what’s really underway here. And the Naor jockey for position, as always, so that they may end up on top. It doesn’t matter if that top is the very highest spot on a collapsing tower. It’s that momentary supremacy that’s important to them.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “What do you think I should do?”

  Tesra hadn’t expected that question. “Isn’t there a way to work with both? Even after we stop the Goddess?”

  “How optimistic you are. The Altenerai will try to arrest me for my imagined crimes. That won’t go well for them, of course.” Cerai set her hands on the table, fingers interlaced. “I don’t think you’ve decided where you stand. Your relationships with both the Altenerai and the exalts are awkward. And allying with the Naor is abhorrent to you. So you’re trying to take my measure.”

  “You’re so forthright.”

  “Why shouldn’t I be? We don’t have an excess of time. Tell me what you want, and we’ll see if I can accommodate it.”

  “I’m not sure what I want anymore,” Tesra said truthfully. “Unless it’s to be on the right side the next time I choose one. I’ve been fooled by all kinds of people I’ve trusted. I don’t want to be tricked again.”

  Cerai straightened in her chair. “Do you know what will happen when the Goddess is destroyed?”

  “I’m not sure.” Tesra wondered how this tied into any of her own wants.

  “All of that magical energy will be free at once. It has to be channeled or it will have the same effect it did when the death of the Goddess left The Fragments, well, fragmented. It will be worse, because then there were multiple gods fighting to contain those energies.”

  Tesra was most concerned with Cerai’s primary point. “We have no gods to contain the energy,” she said.

  “You have me, though. I’ve been preparing for the moment when that power would be released for years, though it happened differently than I predicted. I’d thought I’d be channeling power when the queen opened the hearthstones. Now I’ll have to kill a goddess, but the end result will be the same one I’ve trained for. That power will be mine. It would almost be limitless. And I mean to share some of it.”

  “Really?” Tesra asked, hoping her concern was hidden by the interest she feigned.

  “
I plan on enlisting a few trusted allies. People of great integrity imbued with hearthstone energy. That’s all the Gods we worshiped really were.” Cerai leaned forward again. “Think of all the problems they could put right. Why, they could stop quakes, storms, and pestilence. If a conflict flared up for some reason, a sentinel could quickly bring the people to heel.”

  Cerai seemed to be missing an obvious drawback. “That level of power could be abused.”

  “Indeed it could. That’s why it can only be granted to the best people.”

  She was at least as mad as the queen. Tesra hoped her polite smile still served as a mask.

  “Surely you see where this was going. You’re a spell caster of moderate strength and better-than-usual skill. You’re well-trained. You’re patient. And I think you’ve seen just what unchecked power has done, so you’d be reluctant to act thoughtlessly.”

  Tesra had no problem agreeing with that sentiment, and nodded.

  “There are naturally the obvious benefits, but you may not have realized that my sentinels would possess extended longevity. You wouldn’t age, Tesra. You would be beautiful forever.”

  Cerai appeared to have thought that an important point, so Tesra nodded once more.

  Cerai rose, tucked the chair back into her table, and opened a cabinet door behind her. From it she removed the shaping tool. “I’ll let you try it out so you have a taste of the kind of power you can wield if you join me.”

  “Where did it come from?” Tesra asked.

  The alten hadn’t yet relinquished hold of the staff, which, while seemingly carved of stone, was absolutely, perfectly cylindrical. “Our ‘gods.’ They used it to focus their magical energies when they built the realms. It’s been a tremendous aid in building my little oasis here.”

  At Tesra’s awed look, Cerai smiled, and passed over the staff.

  Tesra’s hands glided over the cool, smooth surface. She was so absorbed with the monumental astonishment of holding something that had shaped the five realms, it was a moment before she could speak. “How does it work?”

  “Come with me. I’ll show you.”

  19