Have a Heart 1

by Rachel Burns

  He thought about the way they were before they had come here. It was like they had been robbing themselves of their own childhood.

  He watched what they were giving each other so he could have an idea what to give his sisters. CD’s seemed to be the runner this year. He looked at the titles. He could stop off on the way home.

  Scott noticed that Brianna had received a book. She had started reading in it already.

  Brianna thanked Maureen for the book and then hung her head so she could fight off the tears. She was being too sensitive again. She thought how difficult it had been to pick out a gift for Scott.

  Still, she had a feeling that the other girls didn’t take her as being an entire person. She was just the sick girl. This book was proof of that. It was a book about special diets for heart patients. She could have written this book herself.

  The girls were talking amongst themselves. No one was talking to her, again. This was just like always. She brought her book to her room and lingered in there awhile. She washed her face before she went out again. Gretchen asked her if she could sing again.

  Brianna did, serving the function of a radio. She went to bed early. Scott didn’t even open his gift from her. Had she known what they all thought about her then she could have gotten away with just coloring a picture like a four year old.

  She cried herself to sleep.

  The Dean knocked on Jenny’s door. She cringed as he did. “Brianna dropped this off for you.” He held the box out to her.

  Jennifer got up from her desk and took it. She was unsure, and she didn’t trust him or anybody else. Slowly, she unwrapped it, opened up the box, and pulled out a music box. It played a nice melody.

  The Dean took it from her and looked it over. He saw that it was only a music box. He gave it back to her. “You may keep it, Jenny.”

  “Thank you, sir.”

  Martin watched her take it to her desk like it was out of pure gold. He didn’t let her have much, wanting to keep everything at a bare minimum. He wanted her to be thankful for everything that she got from him.

  Martin had thought his methods were working, but he had caught her begging another student to take a letter and mail it for her from home. She didn’t know that he had caught her yet. He intercepted the letter and read it. She wanted her boyfriend and his friends to come and get her.

  Martin cared very much about her in the meantime. He had hired a private detective to find her boyfriend. The young man had gotten another girl pregnant. The baby was due any day now. Which meant that she was pregnant before Jenny had left for school.

  He went back to his desk. Jenny listened to her music box again and again. He heard the tune, then the cranking and then the tune again.

  Chapter 11 – Visiting Home

  Brianna hugged her parents, first her mom and then her dad after he had set down a couple of water crates. She showed them her report card, and they hugged her again.

  Her father carried up fresh water for her and taking away the empty bottles. He drove off to take the empties back to the store.

  Her mother took her dirty laundry and her bags and carried them down for her. Brianna felt like she was a burden.

  She was quiet on the way home, but she did ask when she could transfer to a real school. Her parents were worried again. They wondered what had happened.

  Brianna looked out of the window at whatever they passed by all the way home and wondered if she could ever have a real friend. It was a long way home, and she had a lot of time to think about how different and naïve she was. She had cried all of last night so she wouldn’t let herself cry again in front of her parents.

  They shouldn’t know how lonely her life really was.

  “Brianna, you look wonderful. That dress brings out the green in your eyes.” Charles Banks watched his daughter walking down the stairs at their house. He had missed her so much. It felt good to have her at home again. He was looking forward to sitting in church with the two most beautiful women in town.

  Charles was so proud of what he had achieved in life. He had gotten the most beautiful woman, the one that everyone had been after, to marry him. He managed to keep her, and that meant something nowadays.

  They had an amazing daughter who had fought against death since the day she was born, and she always came out the winner. She was a beautiful and bright child who was a pleasure to be around. He had a good home for his family and enough money so that Brianna always had the very best doctors.

  He stood at the bottom of the staircase and held his arm out to her.

  She linked her arm through his and smiled at him.

  Her smile was the same fake kind she had been giving them all along. He wished he could fix whatever was bothering her.

  His wife came down and smiled at the two of them. She hurried down to them and linked her arm in her husband’s other arm. He proudly took his family to church.

  The service had gone long and the church was so crowded that lots of people had been forced to stand.

  Brianna’s parents had taken off to mingle like they did every Sunday after church.

  Brianna was trying to get to the piano in the fellowship room. She was in luck too; no one else was using it. She slid into the seat and lifted her fingers to the keys. It was like a magnet was pulling her fingers in. She started to play.

  When the others recognized the melody, some started to sing along. She sang along too then. She had been playing for about a half an hour when someone sat down next to her.

  “Hello, Brianna.”

  She turned and saw that it was a girl from her high school. “Hello, Cathy.” Brianna beamed at her.

  Cathy hugged her so suddenly. Brianna had forgotten how impulsive she was, but she hugged her back anyway. Cathy had always been very nice to her. She had never treated her like she was about to die like everyone else had.

  Cathy had the gift of gab. She told Brianna all about her school and about the boys at her school. Cathy even had her eye on one in particular. Brianna told her that she went to a college just for girls. Cathy looked at her with pity in her eyes. “But then you can’t date?”

  “Are you dating a real boy?” Brianna asked as she continued to play for the people in the room.

  “They are called college men. Men, mind you, not boys. And to answer your question, yes. I have been on several dates. It’s a great feeling when they come to pick you up and take you out.” She leaned her head against Brianna’s shoulder.

  Scott had gotten separated from his family. He was particularly worried about his youngest sister. She had changed so much now that she went to college. She seemed more alive but in a wild way, like she was hyper. He never saw her sitting down calmly. All she talked about was boys.

  He wanted a chance to take her aside and talk to her before he left. He needed to explain to her that boys would get her nowhere fast.

  Scott went into the fellowship room. Someone was playing the piano. He briefly thought about Brianna. He had unpacked her gift this morning. It was a law book. It was something that he would have bought for himself.

  How had she known? He hadn’t told anyone at college that he planned to go back to school to study law. It was weird.

  Scott spotted his sister. She was sitting by another girl at the piano. Again he had to think about Brianna. This girl had hair just like hers. Cathy seemed to have found a long lost friend. The girls were giggling, and then the one playing the piano turned slightly. It was Brianna.

  He stopped and moved to the side so they couldn’t see him.

  Brianna started a new song. She and Cathy both sang. They smiled at each other as they sang.

  Brianna was so happy to have someone talking normally to her and sharing her secrets like real friends did.

  When the song was finished, two boys stepped forward and offered to get them something to drink. They were both good-looking.

  Scott was already eyeing the two boys. He scowled at them, but they were just staring at his sister and his – W
ell, whatever Brianna was to him.

  The boys took off. “Great, now how are we going to get rid of them?” Brianna sighed. Scott smiled behind her. He really liked that girl.

  “Why ever would we want to?” Cathy responded. Yep, he needed to have a talk with her.

  “I’d rather talk to you.”

  The boys had gone off to get them something to drink. Scott followed them and listened to them fight over who got who. They talked about the girls like they were meat. Scott hurried back to them.

  Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his father talking to Brianna’s father. That must be how the girls knew each other. The men were laughing about something.

  He returned to his spot on the wall and pretended to be listening to the music.

  The boys came back and gave the girls their drinks.

  Brianna thanked the one who seemed to have chosen her. Cathy’s eyes flirted as she thanked her boy.

  He leaned in on the piano and smiled at her. Brianna’s boy looked disappointed that she wasn’t friendlier.

  Of course, he didn’t know what her father would do to her if she flirted shamelessly with boys. Maybe Cathy just needed a good strapping too.

  Cathy continued to flirt. Scott just couldn’t watch her anymore. She was acting like Gretchen had when she first came to school. He had to stop her before she embarrassed herself anymore. But then Brianna would see him too. Was that a problem? He was off duty. She wasn’t his problem at the moment.

  Was Cathy leaning forward on purpose so that boy could look down her blouse because he sure was looking?

  Scott stepped forward and laid a hand on each of their shoulders. “Tell me ladies, do you take requests?”

  They both jumped, Cathy worse than Brianna because Cathy was guilty of something. She looked back at her big brother. He was eight years older than she was and really tall. Cathy saw that he was eyeing the boys who were still thinking that maybe they had a chance with the girls.

  “Scott, I would like to introduce you to my friend, Brianna. We went to school together.” Cathy was trying to be extra fine and appropriate. “Brianna, this is my brother, Scott.”

  Brianna just stared at him with her jaw dropped. She shut it and collected herself. “Merry Christmas.” She was able to bite back the sir that would have usually come out.

  He noticed and smiled at her. “Merry Christmas, Brianna and thank you for your gift. I opened it this morning. How did you know that it would interest me?”

  “I just had a feeling.” Brianna was beet red.

  “You two know each other – from school?” Cathy was laughing.

  Brianna’s head sank. She would know what kind of school her brother worked at. She would think the worst.

  “Ouch, knock it off, Scott,” Cathy yelped. “I can guess why she is there. It doesn’t matter Brianna. What should we sing next?”

  “Brianna can sing any song you want. She practices every day. Maybe if you laid off the boys, you could learn an instrument too.” He moved away from the girls and over to his other sister, Sharon, who was flirting away too. He was more gracious about joining her conversation, but he got rid of that guy too.

  Brianna and Cathy had been watching. They laughed as Sharon laid into him. He scolded right back.

  “That’s my older sister Sharon. My oldest sister Rebecca isn’t here, she married and moved off,” Cathy explained.

  “Let me guess, he just look away for a second, and then she used her chance and got away? That’s why he never loosens his guard anymore?”

  “That was a good one, Brianna. Don’t tell me he is your floor disciplinarian?” Cathy’s eyes widened.

  Brianna nodded embarrassed. She was playing again so no one would listen to them talking.

  “How bad is he?”

  Brianna laughed. She wasn’t sure how to answer that. She thought about him paddling her, and she thought about him holding her afterwards. No, she didn’t know how to answer that question, not even to herself.

  The pastor came up behind them and asked if Brianna will take requests for money. The church needed a new playground. Which was true, the things had been old when Brianna was a kid. She agreed.

  Scott saw the pastor talking to the girls. He moved back over in their direction. He didn’t think that the pastor would actually ask them if they had gone to church.

  “Have you been attending church regularly, girls?” the pastor asked.

  “I have gone every week accept once when I was sick.” Brianna sounded as guilty as hell, Scott thought. He couldn’t wait to hear his sister’s answer.

  Cathy looked very nervous. She bit her lip when she saw Scott standing behind the pastor listening. “I um – haven’t made it there – yet.”

  Scott laughed, and the pastor turned to him.

  Scott’s eyes widened as the pastor looked at him. He could see Brianna and Cathy grinning at him. “Twice,” he answered. He was at least ahead of Cathy.

  “Yes, well,” The pastor took off to make the announcement. He was laughing to himself.

  “See you didn’t need a note,” Scott said to Brianna. He moved back over to ruin Sharon chance of meeting a nice man at church.

  The announcement came over the intercom. Brianna’s parents came in. Her mother dug in her purse and pulled out her wallet. “Silent Night, in German.” She slipped a twenty dollar bill into the bowl that the pastor had laid out for that.

  Brianna nodded and started right in singing. After a while, her mother joined her. It was nice to watch them together like that, Scott thought.

  Her father also got out a twenty. He wanted I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus. The crowd laughed, and his wife laid her arms around her husband and gave him a kiss.

  Scott could hardly believe that this was the same man that had given his daughter a very harsh strapping. They just looked so happy.

  Brianna and Cathy talked all afternoon. They made arrangements to see each other again. Scott wasn’t too sure he liked that idea, but both her and his parents thought that it was a good idea. Their parents seemed to get along very well. Their fathers played golf together. Scott didn’t know that.

  His father had a construction company. It was doing well but with four kids going to college, one after the other, his mom had to work too. She was a nurse, who worked odd hours. She would be working most of this Christmas vacation too.

  Scott was disappointed. He had wanted to talk to her about a few things. Well, maybe he would get a chance during summer vacation. It wasn’t that important anyway.

  His old boss, from his college days asked if he wanted to work for him a few days. Scott agreed right away. It would mean carrying around a lot of heavy sacks of grain, but he sure did want to get back to school before he gave up on the idea all together.

  Besides, it would mean that he wouldn’t always be at home when Brianna was there.

  He could guess in which part of town their house stood. His family lived on the outskirts of town on a farm that wasn’t a farm anymore. He had loved it as a kid growing up, but what would Brianna say to it?

  What did it matter, he scolded himself. She would be there to play with his sister. She might even show up with her Barbie dolls, he thought.

  Cathy and Brianna did indeed meet every day. One day at Brianna’s house and then at Cathy’s. They quickly became the best of friends.

  When Scott came home from work, he checked to see if Brianna was there too. She seemed to fit right in.

  One day, he came home, and Brianna was standing in the kitchen cooking. She didn’t turn to look at him. He looked around for Cathy. She wasn’t there. Why was Brianna cooking?

  “Brianna.”

  She still didn’t turn around. He stepped forward and tapped her on the shoulder. She jumped sky high again before she turned and then again when she saw him.

  Scott sighed and rolled his eyes a little when he saw that she had earphones in. He pulled them out. “Where is Cathy?”

  “Your father is having a ta
lk with her.” She turned a little red as she admitted that.

  “What is he talking to her about?” The way Brianna was acting it must be good.

  “I um – think that he is having the talk with her,” Brianna stammered out her words.

  Scott thought about that a second, “Oh, I see,” he laughed. He sobered up. “Why didn’t he wait for you to go home first? What happened?”

  Brianna shuffled from one foot to the other one. She didn’t want to tattle. Cathy just seemed boy crazy. She had been telling Brianna how glad she was that she wasn’t at an all-girls school like Brianna was. Cathy talked about a couple of the boys, and that they like to kiss her. Her father walked in and pulled her out into the living room. Their conversation had started out loud, but it had gotten quiet in the last couple of minutes. Brianna decided to listen to music and drown them out.

  “I really can’t say,” she hedged.

  “Brianna.” He gave her a look and used his, don’t mess with me tone.

  “It isn’t my place to say. This is between Cathy and your dad.” She shrugged her shoulders.

  “I’m warning you.” Scott lifted up his pointer finger and his eyes narrowed.

  She tilted her head to the side and thought about that for a second. He couldn’t do anything to her here, but he sure could as soon as they got back to school. “She seems to be dating.” She hoped her rather vague answer would appease him.

  “I see. What does she do on a date?” He tried to ask as casually as he could.

  She smiled at him. “Let me guess, you don’t mean dinner and a movie.”

  He laughed before he could stop himself. He tried to be serious, but Cathy came back in before he could scold Brianna again.

  “Dad should talk to you two, not me.” Cathy folded her arms over her chest. She looked mad.

  Scott went to talk to his father, and Cathy moved in close to talk to Brianna.

  “What did you tell him?” she whispered.