Witch Happens

by A. M. King

  “It is?” Febe arched her brow.

  “Yes. And I’ve been fighting to get this Halloween business straight.”

  “What? What do you mean? I thought witches loved Halloween. Not that I thought witches really existed.”

  Aunt Trixie cringed again. “Oh, pull-ease! Are you crazy, girl? No self-respecting witch would buy into that negative hype. It makes us all look crazy and evil, riding on broomsticks, wreaking havoc. Who ever heard of such a thing?”

  “But...how do you...get around?”

  “The same way you do, silly.” Aunt Trixie was not amused.

  “Some of us do get around on stick, dear,” Aunt Vanity added. “Depends on the type of stick, of course.”

  “But not those horrible old broomsticks. Do you really think those things could fly with all the magic in the world?”

  “Trixie! Be kind to the girl.” Aunt Eartha was her usual protective self with Febe, for which she was grateful. This was all a lot to sink in, especially on her birthday. Not that if she’d found out on any other day, it would have made a difference.

  “Well, actually, it’s not entirely true,” Aunt Vanity said, still filing intently on her long, manicured fingernails. “You see we can levitate and move swiftly to get around. Some of us, anyway,” she said.

  “Oh, I see.”

  “No, you haven’t seen anything yet, but you will darling,” Aunt Trixie said.

  “But be warned, you are experiencing things now, like magical feelings, intense energies, but you will not be able to practice magic fully until you become licensed.”

  “What? Licensed? For what?”

  “To practice magic, darling. Just because certain people might be able to drive, doesn’t mean they should drive on the road unless they’ve been tested and learned the proper rules of the road. I’m sure any idiot can get into a car and switch on the engine and steer it on the road. Or take something like healing. That’s more in line with the craft.”

  “The craft?”

  “Yes, dear. The craft. Anyway, most people know how to nurse a wound but you need a license to call yourself a nurse or to practice in a safe manner with the public. Magic is similar. It’s all in the handbook we have for you.”

  Febe took another swig of her drink. “Okay, now I know I’m going insane. This is all a dream. I’m going to wake up soon and this will all be over like...puff.”

  “No, darling. I’m afraid it’s real. Very real. We’ll have you registered with the Council of Witches in no time.”

  “The Council of Witches? There’s a council for this thing?”

  “Yes, it’s like a secret society around here. We’ll explain more later, dear. Madam Techer will be your teacher. You’ll be taking classes with her soon to study for your license.”

  Febe took another swig of her drink, trying to drown out the truth or soak it all in without getting sick. “So I’ll have to go back to school, after I’ve just finished uni?”

  “Yes. But as you know, in life, you never stop learning. You can’t know it all. Every day we learn something new.”

  “You’re telling me,” Febe said with a glazed expression.

  “But you must be careful. Not everyone knows about us or wants us around. There are certain elements of society that would rather we didn’t exist. Now the Bay is a safe town for us, but it’s a magic-free zone. We can only practise or use our powers when it is very necessary and only in certain controlled environments.”

  “Or what? We’d have our license revoked?” Febe arched her brow, trying hard not to grin.

  “Worse than that, dear.”

  The smile was wiped off Febe’s face.

  Chapter 5

  Twenty minutes later, her FaceTime session ended with her aunties, Febe shook her head as she got off the sofa .

  Her mind was still in a daze. She went into the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee, then changed her mind.

  What she probably needed was another glass of wine. She’d planned to share her bottle of wine with Jonathan, after they’d both celebrated their birthdays when he got back from Vancouver. But that didn’t happen, did it? In fact, nothing in her day went as planned.

  What was wrong with her life? Like, seriously.

  She would need to pack soon. She’d already paid her rent for the month of October and the landlord could keep the last month’s rent deposit if he had a problem with her not giving him much notice. She would totally understand that. Right now she had other things bubbling in her brain.

  “Can you believe that, Ebony?” Febe said, talking to her now woken black cat. Ebony was stretching and yawning. Not that she’d had a long nap.

  “I’m a...a witch,” Febe said breathless.

  “I know, right?”

  Febe placed a few dishes into the dishwasher and closed the door and pressed the start cycle. “I mean, imagine that. I can’t...”

  Febe froze.

  She then spun around in shock. Eyes widened as if she’d seen a ghost. Her heart fluttered in her chest.

  Okay, keep calm, Febe. You’re hearing things. You’re simply hearing things, that’s all. Keep calm and grab a coffee.

  “D-did...did you just...t-talk?” She said to her cat.

  Ebony yawned again, not a care in the world as she sat in her kitty basket.

  Phew, I thought for a minute I was going crazy.

  “No, you’re not going crazy, girl,” Ebony spoke again. “I’m really quite glad you finally got it together and you’ve come of age. It was a drag waiting for this moment. Do you know how crazy it is to keep your mouth shut and pretend you don’t have a voice? You have no idea.”

  Um. Okay. Now it’s safe to panic.

  Febe felt faint. She immediately flopped down on the kitchen island stool and arched her brow, her jaw still hung wide open.

  “W-what did you j-just say?”

  Her black cat was possessed.

  “W-who a-are you?” Febe asked, cautiously.

  “Oh, no, girlfriend. Please do not be afraid. I’m just a friend.”

  “B-but. It’s impossible. You’re the cat I...I rescued from...”

  “Hmmm-mmm. Yeah, sorry about that, girl. It was all part of the plan. It was a test. Well, the first part anyway.”

  Febe thought she was really losing her mind now. “Excuse me?”

  “You see, I crossed your path on purpose, limping and all. It was all part of the plan to see what kind of heart you had, to see if you deserved to have me around, protecting you and all. You aced that test.”

  “What?”

  “Nothing’s a coincidence, doll. Don’t let the universe fool you. Sometimes things happen because they were supposed to happen. You wouldn’t have scooped me up and kept me with you if I hadn’t crossed your path that day.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “Come on now girl, you had your studies, your job. Your life was way too busy to have me around. You weren’t even planning on having a family of your own until you reached your thirties.”

  “Hey! How did you know?”

  Febe scratched her head, still dazed that her cat was speaking to her.

  Then a flood of embarrassment washed over her. All this time, she thought Ebony was just a cat.

  What about those embarrassing private moments?

  Crap.

  Febe spoke to herself a lot, didn’t she?

  Double crap.

  Ebony probably overheard her talking about her most private thoughts and feelings. She would have kept her mouth shut if she had known her kitty understood every single word and would one day talk back to her. She couldn’t afford to let Ebony out of her sight now. She knew too much about her, she half-joked in her mind.

  Febe drew in a deep breath. This was not going to be easy.

  Chapter 6

  Later that night, Febe finished her shower and got ready for bed. Still in shock, her mind was spinning with disbelief over the events that had unfolded during the day.

  She was a witch.


  Her black Bombay cat, Ebony could talk. And oh, boy could she talk.

  Her aunties were all witches, too. So was her sister, Janvier, and her late mother.

  Okay, this was too much for her brain.

  Too much information. Too much to process too soon. This was by far the worst. Birthday. Ever!

  As she toweled off her hair, Ebony strutted into the room. Whereas in the past she would undress, talk to herself, or whatever when Ebony was around, now, she was way too self-conscious.

  “Um, excuse me, Ebony,” she said, feeling deeply uneasy about how to approach this without offending her black Bombay. “I’m about to...get ready for bed.” She didn’t want to pull off her robe and expose her bare skin in front of Ebony—not anymore.

  “Oh, excuse me,” Ebony said, “You didn’t mind having me in the room all the other times.”

  “Yes, but...”

  Okay, this was too insane. She was speaking to her cat and her cat was speaking back to her.

  “You weren’t talking then,” Febe finished her sentence.

  “Oh, I get it. You didn’t mind doing whatever the heck you pleased when I was in the room because I was just your dumb cat.”

  “No!” Febe’s voice raised an octave. “No, no, no. Of course not. Ebony, you know I would never look at you that way.”

  “When I said dumb cat, I’m not referring to the informal definition of a having reduced intellectual capacity, darling. I’m referring to the formal definition of one who is unable to speak,” Ebony said, suddenly sounding more like a British-accented professor, than a casually-speaking cat.

  Okay. “Um, listen. I get it...I just...listen all of this is new to me, okay. I’ve got to figure out my life now.”

  “Oh, darling, I’m just pulling your leg. You’ll have to get used to my wry sense of humor.”

  Febe gave her a startled look. “I don’t think your wry sense of humor is my biggest concern right now, Ebony.”

  “Right, of course,” she giggled.

  It was so bizarre watching her cat giggle like that, her little black tummy jiggling.

  Just then her cell phone rang, startling her.

  She went over to the bedside table to answer it.

  She glanced at the screen. It was her sister, Janvier.

  Why would Janvier be calling her now?

  They weren’t exactly close or anything. In fact, Janvier had always been evasive when it came to talking about the family or anything else, for that matter. Whenever she did speak to Febe, Janvier preferred to text or send an email, even if she were in the same house. Granted Grandma Summer’s massive Victorian house could easily house five families. There were so many quarters and hidden passageways. It was creepy and massive. One would hardly go from one end to the other to speak to someone.

  “Hey, Jan,” she finally answered cautiously.

  “Hey, Sis. Happy Birthday again,” Janvier sounded unusually bubbly. That was so unlike her. Was this whole world turned upside down or something? “Did you get my text earlier?”

  “Yeah, I did. Thanks so much. I replied with a thumbs-up emoticon.”

  “Ah, yeah. Of course.” There was silence on the phone line for a moment. “Listen, I just spoke to Aunt Trixie.”

  “Oh.” She knew there was a reason for Janvier calling.

  “I know you have a lot on your mind right now. I did, too.”

  “I can imagine. Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

  “The same reason why I couldn’t speak to you before and the same reason everyone has been a bit standoffish with you since you turned eighteen.”

  “What? Why?”

  “Listen, chick. I’m coming to get you. I just got off the highway. I’ll be there in a moment. We’ll drive back to Blackshore Bay together okay?”

  “Um. All right. But are you sure?”

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  “But I need time to pack.”

  “No worries, Sis. I’ll help you.”

  “Okay, now I’m really suspicious.”

  “Why?”

  “Because you are never nice to me. Not unless there’s a hidden reason.”

  There was silence on the phone.

  “Actually, Sis. You’re intuition is getting sharper.”

  “What do you mean by that?”

  “I’m coming to kill you.”

  Chapter 7

  “Did you just say you’re coming to kill me?” Febe asked her sister over the phone, not believing what she’d just heard. “And you expect me to stay here waiting for my demise?”

  There was silence on the other end of the phone line. All she could hear was the sound of traffic and wind blowing.

  Janvier was driving with the window open.

  Dead air. Then that funny beep as if someone had hung up their cell phone.

  Febe stared into the phone with shock.

  Was her sister up to her old prankish tricks again? This wasn’t funny. Not one little bit.

  “What’s up, girl? Cat got your tongue?” Ebony said.

  “What?” Febe turned to Ebony, stunned.

  “Sorry, couldn’t resist. That saying came from the Middle Ages. It was thought that if you saw a witch, her cat would steal or control your tongue such that you could not report the sighting. Never did like that saying, anyway.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m not sure what to feel right now.” She slumped down on her bed, dazed. “I never could read my sister.”

  “What’s going on?”

  Suddenly, as weird as it sounded, Febe was glad she had someone to talk to right now. In the city, everybody was preoccupied with their smartphones, dealing with the pressures of work. No one really interacted much.

  “Did you hear my phone conversation, Ebony?”

  “I heard it, girl. Don’t worry. I’m here in your life for a reason. There’s a reason evil people fear cats, especially black cats.”

  Suddenly, Febe was glad her black cat could talk. She had a true, loyal friend.

  There was a loud pounding on her front door. Her heart knocked hard against her ribcage.

  Who was that?

  She glanced at the clock then went over to the door and peeked through the peephole. She saw no one.

  “Who is it?”

  “Your sister, Jan.”

  “Go ahead, girl, answer it. She’s straight,” Ebony said walking past the door.

  “Right. Of course.” Cats were good at sensing evil. It was obvious her little guardian was there looking out for her and didn’t sense any fear.

  She slowly opened the door leaving the chain on, just to be sure. She’d read about people being morphed into other beings from those comics she loved reading.

  “Hey,” Janvier said. “I’m good.” Janvier stood there with her dark brunette hair up in a ponytail. She must have just finished work at the café. She always wore it down on days she was not working around food.

  Febe unhooked the chain and opened the door wider, staring at her suspiciously.

  “What?” Janvier said.

  “What do you mean what? You scared the crap out of me just now.”

  “Oh, that. Sorry, Sis,” she said, walking through the apartment, looking around. “I didn’t mean to terrorize you just now. Just having a little fun. You know it’s good to have a sense of humor.”

  “Yeah, if it’s tasteful.”

  “Hey, Eb. What’s going?” Janvier turned to Febe’s black cat.

  “Not bad. Yourself?”

  “Trying to keep it real.”

  “I hear you.” Ebony then waltzed into the bedroom leaving the two sisters alone, Febe with her jaw wide open in shock.

  “You know my cat can talk?” Did everyone know about Febe’s life, except her? Why was she always the last to know everything?

  “Relax, Sis,” Janvier rolled her eyes. “We all knew.”

  “You did?”

  “Who do you think sent her here to watch over you while you were at university and living in the big
city all by yourself?”

  “What?”

  “You know Aunt Trixie doesn’t mess around, right? She’s one crazy cat lady.”

  “So she sent Ebony?”

  Janvier shrugged. “Kind of. You got anything to drink?”

  “Um. Yeah, what do you want? Hot or cold?”

  “I could use a coffee right now.”

  “Aren’t you worried about being up all night?”

  “I don’t think either of us will be sleeping tonight, Sis.”

  “Oh, great.”

  Janvier helped herself to the coffee maker.

  “Anyway, sorry about earlier. We got cut off. Bad reception under the bridge. But when I said I’m going to kill you, I meant I’m going to kill that weak person Febe used to be. She’s dead now. Gone. She’s no longer a woman, she’s a witch. You’ve come of age, Sis. Congratulations.”

  “Yeah, well, I don’t know what to say about that. I don’t feel as if it’s anything to celebrate if you know what I mean.”

  “Hey, it’s no worries. I’ll help you get your license.”

  “My license? What does it matter anyway? I have no intention of ever practicing black magic or magic or witchcraft or whatever it is.”

  “It’s not black magic or witchcraft. Those words have negative connotations. We’re from an enchanted line of souls who can use energy to heal, restore health, or make a change. And besides, you don’t have much choice, Sis.”

  “What do you mean, I don’t have much choice?”

  “We need you. There’s danger.”

  “Danger?” Febe felt her heart muscles contract.

  “Yeah. There’s a lot to go through right now, but... we need the power of seven witches to fight this evil hunter or we’ll be eliminated for good, wiped out, like the vampires. So few of them left today.”

  “Excuse me?”

  Wonderful. She just found out that she was part of a family line. But that family line was on the brink of being extinct.

  Janvier grabbed her coffee and sat on the couch with her boots still on. “But you must be sworn to secrecy.”

  “I don’t get it.”

  “You will soon. Now that you’ve come of age, you’re in danger. You’re one of the last of the Summer Witch bloodline, Sis. I have a sneaky suspicion that mom’s death wasn’t accidental, but that’s another matter. Come home now.”