“Doesn’t it, though?” Vex grinned. “But yes, he’s safely in custody with me. And even though he’s a bit… untamed, my glamour ensures he won’t be eating anyone else anytime soon.”
“Has it actually… eaten anyone?” Jo asked, horrified.
“Well, of course,” Vex replied. Jo blanched at that, and Vex tried to take back what she said. “I mean, I haven’t seen him eat anyone. Nor would I allow the creature to ever harm one of my cohorts, especially Landon.”
“Don’t tell me you’re getting more research ideas,” Ryder said, whispering loudly into Kira’s ear. She batted him away.
“No, no.” She paused. “Then again, Vex has one in custody right now. What could a few information-gathering questions hurt…?”
“Ask me what I tamed him with. You’ll never guess.” Vex chomped another bite down, excited by Kira’s eagerness.
“Just leave the eating people part out of it, at least until after dinner,” Dallin said, an arm around Jo, who smiled sweetly.
And while the six of them exchanged questions and thoughts on the state of the fae world and Vex learned more about what the couples she’d helped were up to these days, she could feel Landon always by her side. Watching and listening patiently. Chiming in when there was something to say but otherwise just happy to be next to her, enjoying a quiet evening.
This world, this kind of peace, wasn’t for her.
But at least for an evening, it was strangely good to feel a part of something she’d never had before in her life.
Something like a family.
13
After dinner, Dallin pulled Landon aside while Vex and the others ate dessert out on the back patio, the discussion having moved toward much simpler topics like Jo’s baking videos.
Landon almost hesitated to leave her for long. After all, he’d sensed Vex’s discomfort early on. Had noticed the way she’d been a bit reserved at the start, almost wary of everyone.
Thankfully, his friends had all been as kind and patient as he’d known them to be. And it seemed, watching Vex speak animatedly from the window, that she was starting to fit right in.
Not that he had a mind to change her. She was perfect the way she was.
All he could do was show her what life outside the Blur and her missions could look like and hope it was what she wanted too.
“What’s up?” Landon asked, propping himself against the counter in the kitchen as Dallin looked out the window, up at the moon.
“So is she your mate?”
Landon almost lost his balance at the directness of Dallin’s question. Granted, he’d always been like that.
Dallin peered over one big shoulder, expression unreadable. “I knew it.”
The way he said it caught Landon off guard. Had he been reading Landon’s thoughts?
“If you’re wondering if I was reading your thoughts, of course not. It’s plain as day on your face.” He turned to face Landon now. “I mean, we’ve all known you’ve had something for her from the start, but I wasn’t convinced it couldn’t just be puppy love or a misguided attraction because she rescued you.”
“Yes, she saved me, but that’s not why I love her.”
“I see that now.” Dallin pushed off the counter and walked a slow circle around the kitchen island. “But before you go all in, I should warn you.”
“Warn me about what? What is there that isn’t already out in the open? After all, you were her friend for years.” It was difficult to tell where Dallin was going with all of this.
“I still am, though I know she’s been searching for something new to focus on ever since we almost destroyed the light kingdom. But above all, she’s not an easy person to understand.”
“Why would you tell me that?”
Landon had seen her walls rise sky high, time after time, since showing up on her doorstep in the Blur.
Yet the farther they went, the more he could see that he wasn’t the only one who wanted more between them. If only Vex could see that what they had was more than just simple attraction.
He’d be by her side for however long that took.
“You’re getting that face again,” Dallin muttered.
“What face?”
“The face that makes me worried you’re in too deep.”
“I thought you wanted her to be happy, Dallin,” Landon said, bristling. He was getting frustrated at all of Dallin’s doubting.
Dallin’s face hardened. “I want you both to be happy. But I’m not oblivious to the fact that when she had the chance to find a new life here on earth, she kept on fighting. And even now, hearing that she’s in the Blur, working with people who are obviously bad, it makes me wonder if you’re both headed into something that will end badly.”
“Since when did you have so little faith in Vex?”
Dallin scoffed. “You’re misunderstanding me. That and I’m coming off all wrong. I’m trying to work on that.” His shoulders slumped a bit. “I’m not saying it’s bad, what she’s doing. In fact, I know her to be the strongest, most independent, loyal person I’ve ever met. There was a reason I would’ve given up everything for her cause.”
Landon listened, slightly placated.
“But if you’re hoping for a domestic life, a mate you can just enjoy being with—something like I have with Jo or that Ryder has with Kira—then I don’t know if you’re asking for disaster. Vex is complicated. A mystery even to herself, I think.” He folded his arms. “So is she a good person, even an amazing person? Yes. Do I know she’s a natural-born leader, and am I grateful to her every day for what she’s done for you and me and all of our kind? Yes. Could she settle down?” He sighed. “I have no clue.”
“I think there’s a lot you don’t know about her, Dallin,” Landon said, getting face to face with the unintimidated emerald dragon. But it was time to show that he wasn’t just some lovestruck idiot following an unwilling Vex around.
“She’s funny. She’s kind but only when no one is looking. She’s patient and forgiving but only to people who deserve it. She’s badass and adventurous and honest, and if she decides to choose a life with me, it will make me the luckiest person in the entire universe.” He grabbed Dallin’s shirt, feeling so passionate he didn’t even realize he’d done it until Dallin looked down at Landon’s hand, then back up, with those surly teal eyes.
“She really is your mate, then.”
“Of course she’s my mate!” He said it a little too loudly. “And I’ll do whatever it takes, even move heaven and earth just for the chance to be with her. And if Vex doesn’t want that, then I’ll accept her decision. But until then, I’ll wake up every day doing my best to make her happy, even if it means making her happy in spite of herself.”
Dallin’s slightly shocked expression turned up into a smirk. “You two really are too perfect for each other. It’s almost silly.” He finally extracted Landon’s hand from his shirt and straightened himself. “If my best friend has a shot at finding love, then maybe it’s with you, Landon. Just be ready for the fight of your life.”
“I was ready for that from the first moment I laid eyes on her.”
“You were half conscious when you first laid eyes on her,” Dallin said.
“Maybe,” Landon replied, ignoring Dallin’s curious glance as Landon walked past him to take the biscotti he’d made earlier and turned on the coffeemaker.
The truth was a little more complicated.
Vex froze where she stood, about to enter the kitchen, Landon’s words ringing in her ears.
Of course she’s my mate! I’ll do whatever it takes, even move heaven and earth just for the chance to be with her.
Her heart felt like it was trying to pound its way out of her chest, and all she could hear was the rushing of blood in her ears.
She took a few steps back, hoping they hadn’t heard her approach, and quickly darted down the hall to her room, shutting the door when she got there.
Maybe she’d just been letting things slide too
much since they got here. Letting things get out of hand.
She’d tried to be up-front with Landon, and she didn’t want to hurt him. Didn’t want to hurt any of these amazing people who were nothing like her, except for Dallin.
But even Dallin had never really been sold on vengeance and bloodshed the way Vex was.
He could fit into this world just fine.
Plus, he didn’t have countless dangerous people seeking him, looking for revenge.
If Vex settled with Landon, lived with Landon…
For a moment, the thought was almost too wonderful. But then she thought of his innocent face. His soft expressions. The kindness in his eyes.
The sweetness that they hadn’t managed to kill in him in the dungeon, though it felt as though they had killed it in her.
Dallin was right about what he said about her not wanting to settle down. When things got too quiet, she was always waiting for the hammer to fall.
Plus, her heart wasn’t like Landon’s, warm and open to everyone.
It was cold, locked behind a gate, and impossible to access.
She could never feel the way he did.
Though, as she thought about leaving him, she felt something cold fill her chest.
But the thought of staying with him was worse. Staying with him might mean something happening to him. Staying with him might be the worst thing for him.
And it would keep him from having someone he deserved. Some normal woman who could settle down with him and be happy like his friends’ mates.
Not someone who always needed to chase the next adventure, always trying to forget.
That’s what this was supposed to be. An adventure with Landon while she figured out her next move.
But now he was in love with her. And she supposed, as she realized she would leave him for his own good even if it destroyed her, she probably loved him back.
Damn, that was an awful thought.
She’d closed her heart long ago due to the constant torture. Love had only been weakness. A way to get hurt. And caring for others… that wasn’t possible when everything in you was broken.
She could care now, somewhat, but she would never be like that.
She let the glamour fade on her hand, looking down at it, the scars crisscrossing over most of her skin.
Not everywhere, and the scars weren’t as raised or discolored as before, but they still showed the torture that had made her what she was.
And once she’d closed off and refused to let them hurt her, things had gotten better and she’d simply focused on gaining more power in order to escape and get revenge.
She let her hand return to its glamoured state, wondering what Landon would say if they made love like that.
You’re beautiful no matter what, he would probably say. She could hear him now.
Her heart ached like someone had shoved a knife in it.
She should never have gotten this close.
If it wasn’t light or chaos fae after her, there were enemies in the Blur. It would be never-ending.
And if she did settle down, she would always feel a bit lost.
To be honest, she’d always felt a bit lost ever since that dungeon. She supposed that was why she’d started on revenge after all.
She sighed, opening her door and making a decision. She had to act now so Landon would have support once she was gone.
Because unless she ended things, he never would. He’d keep crawling after her for scraps of love she might never be able to give.
When someone would treasure him for everything he was.
It was just puppy love. Infatuation because she’d saved him.
No one just fell in love that fast.
Though, her heart told her otherwise.
Vex folded her arms as she walked to the kitchen, stopping at the entrance. “Landon, can I talk to you?”
He smiled at just seeing her, his beautiful blue eyes lighting up.
Damn, she would miss those eyes.
“Sure.” He turned to Dallin. “I’ll be right back.”
She led Landon to his room, and he looked curious as he followed her. When they were inside, she shut and locked the door.
Then she pushed him toward the bed, forcing him to sit down.
“I have to go home. Something came up,” she said.
His brows flew up. “What? But things have been amazing. What happened?”
She felt her throat go tight at the knowledge that this would hurt him. “I… This isn’t going to work.”
Landon couldn’t have been more still if he was carved out of marble. “What?”
She sighed. “I heard what you said to Dallin. You think I’m your mate.”
He looked like he was going to deny it for a moment. Then his head sank. When he met her eyes again, his gaze was guilty but not afraid. “I know you’re my mate. I don’t just think it.”
Vex shook her head, panic rising in her. “Don’t make this harder on us, Landon. Don’t do this to us. It’s been wonderful. It’s been beautiful, but—”
“But it’s not over—”
“It is over because you’re only going to get more attached. I thought you would be happy with something rather than nothing, but I shouldn’t have let you get your hopes up.”
She could see his pulse racing at the base of his neck as he tried to think of something that would stop her.
But there was nothing that could.
She had to do what was best for him even if he didn’t agree. She could walk away even if it hurt her.
Clearly, he didn’t have the strength.
“I don’t get it,” he said. “I thought things were changing. We’ve made love. We’ve spent time together… The way you look at me.”
Her jaw tightened. “I don’t know what you want me to say. I didn’t think you thought things were moving so quickly. I told you from the beginning that you shouldn’t want more.”
He nodded, but his eyes darted back and forth, and she could tell his mind was racing. “Don’t do this. Not right now. Not while everyone’s here. Wait, and I’ll send them home and we can talk.”
“There’s nothing we can talk about.” And now she was Vex from the dungeon. Vex the soldier. Vex the leader. Vex the one who got things done no matter how hard it hurt.
She waved a hand, and a portal appeared. “I’m going to go now before I can hurt us both more. Landon, you’re incredible.”
“No, you’re not leaving. You can’t. I love—”
“Don’t say that,” she snapped as the portal rushed with air.
“Don’t leave me,” he said. “No matter what, I’m just going to find you. It’s not puppy love, Vex. There are things you don’t know. Things I’ve been hiding.”
“Then don’t tell me,” she said. “Save that for your mate. Your real one. Not some broken person who has been using you for sex.”
“You know it’s not that,” he said, and the desperation in his tone almost made her waver.
She didn’t want to hurt him. And something deep inside was burning her alive at the thought of not seeing him again.
But she didn’t get to where she was by being a coward. And once she made a choice, she followed through.
The image of Landon, his body broken after one of the many creatures after her finally hunted them down in their idyllic life, was enough to have her stepping into the portal.
She looked over her shoulder at him one last time. “For what it’s worth, if I could have loved someone, it would have been you.”
“Vex—”
But then she fell into nothing, waving her hand over the portal as she fell so she could be sure he wouldn’t follow.
This would be it for them. No one would send him to the Blur. And no matter how much she wanted to see his face, his eyes, touch his body… she wouldn’t give in.
He’d live his life, and she’d live hers. And she’d always hope that things worked out for him.
Maybe in a few years, when things didn’
t sting so much, she could ask Dallin about him.
She fell to the floor of her office with a thump and wanted to cry when she looked around at the cold furnishings, overcome with the feeling that she was utterly alone.
A part of her desperately wanted to go back to him. Told her she’d acted rashly.
But deep inside, she knew better. She knew the truth.
From the moment she’d touched him, he’d been too close to her.
She’d been flying too close to the sun.
She deserved to be burned.
14
“She’s gone.” Landon stood there, listless, as his friends all looked up at him in shock.
“Oh, honey,” Kira said as Ryder and Dallin shot each other looks and then simultaneously got up to drag Landon into the hallway and down to his bedroom.
“Be right back,” Dallin called out to Jo.
Once they were in his room and Ryder was shutting the door, Landon stood in front of the window, looking out at the empty lawn.
Truthfully, he could barely hear the questions Dallin and Ryder were firing at him rapid style.
His head was still spinning about how fast everything had gone down.
He’d known it would be risky, bringing Vex to the human world, taking her out, meeting his friends.
It was so far from what she was used to and hinted at things he knew she didn’t want.
Love. Commitment.
But how was he supposed to give up when he knew what he knew?
He leaned an arm against the windowsill, still ignoring his friends who were growing silent.
Had he been wrong all along? Had he not found her in time? Was it truly too late for her to be his mate?
She had been happy with him. He was sure of it. She lit up in his arms, challenged him every day, and let him give to her until both of them were beaming.
It was the most happiness he’d ever known.
So it only made sense that he was now feeling the worst misery.
“Hey.” Dallin snapped his fingers loudly. “You want us to leave?”
Landon shrugged. What did it matter anymore? He’d done everything he could. He’d been to the Blur. He’d gone along with her sexual escapades. And for what? To be abandoned. Rage welled in him, which was a rare emotion since he was so peaceful by nature.
Dragon Reformed (Reclaimed Dragons Book 3) Page 10