Forever Broken

by Carrie Ann Ryan

  “So…what happened?” Cheyenne shook her head. “I can tell you what happened, the details, but I don’t know the why of it. Only what I heard him say, or at least think I heard him say.”

  “Blade.” Max said the word, and it didn’t sound like a question, but she answered anyway.

  “Yes. Blade. I take it you, uh…smelled him on me?”

  Max let out a low growl, and so did half of the men in the room. Considering that Blade had either hurt them or their mates, she understood the sentiment.

  “Yes.”

  She nodded. “I was working late on a surgery, and my late-night tech helped me close down the clinic, though she was staying overnight since I had animals in need of care.” She froze. “Is Alex okay? Did Blade get her, too?”

  Cheyenne had asked Max, but it was Kameron who answered. “We talked to her, she’s fine. She doesn’t know what happened, and we’re keeping a lid on it, though she’s curious. That could pose a problem.”

  Cheyenne stiffened. “A problem for who? Alex is a good person. Protective.”

  “We know,” Dhani put in. “She’s just going to keep asking questions that could either get her in trouble with Blade’s Pack or get us in trouble with the humans because of all the new laws and treaties.”

  “I’ll call her. Can I do that? What about my patients?” Cheyenne tried to control her breathing. “I have someone that can come in and help with the clinic, but I need to handle all of that. If I didn’t show up today…” She closed her eyes and pressed her hands to her face. Cheyenne had been so worried about everyone else, she had forgotten she had an actual job in the human realm where she had people and animals that depended on her.

  “Call Alex and whoever you can to come and take care of the clinic,” Gideon said, his voice so authoritative it was easy to see why he was the Alpha. He was kind, but his words left no room for disobedience.

  “For how long?” she asked.

  “Until we figure out what’s going on,” Max answered softly. “It’s not safe until we have a handle on what Blade wants and what’s coming next. And until you’re back in fighting shape. You’ll stay with me until that happens.”

  Cheyenne froze at that statement, but the others seemed to move on from it.

  Aimee walked forward and knelt in front of her. “I’m sorry this is hurting your life, and your world is changing. And if there was any other way, you know the Pack would make it work. The Redwoods have a vet on hand that was married into the Pack recently. The vet is wolf now, but the animals don’t seem to mind. Do you want them to try and help you out, as well? Just until we know you’re safe and those who work for you and rely on you are, too.”

  Cheyenne nodded, trying to keep up. Aimee was the sweetest and most quiet of her friends. The fact that she was now a cat shifter hadn’t changed that.

  Cheyenne patted her friend’s hand, then rolled her shoulders back, trying to get her mind on track. “We’ll handle it. If my colleague can’t take over my remaining patients and appointments, then I’ll ask the Redwood Pack member. But I should get back to my story. I’m sorry for derailing the conversation.”

  “You have your own life, Cheyenne.” Max’s voice pulled her toward him, even though she tried to stay ramrod straight so she could find the strength to get through the upcoming conversations. “It’s okay that you need to get your affairs in order.” He frowned. “And…not how I meant it.”

  That made her smile. Actually smile, even after the night she’d had.

  He didn’t smile back, but his brow rose. She’d count that as a win. The others were waiting for her story, so she continued.

  “I was just headed to my car when someone came at me from behind. I fought back.” She looked at Kameron. “I used the moves you taught me, but they weren’t enough.”

  “Not when you’re dealing with a wolf. But you fought back,” Kameron said sharply. “That counts for more than you want it to.”

  She nodded. “I know. And I’m grateful that I was able to fight at all. He knocked me out. I don’t know if it was Blade or someone working for him, but I woke up, chained to a chair in a small storehouse or shack. I’m not sure what it was, but that doesn’t matter.” She paused. “Was it on Aspen land? I assumed so because it was Blade, but then again, I didn’t hear anyone else around. Not really. So, I don’t know where I was.”

  “You were on neutral land. At least that’s where I found you. I don’t know if you were moved there later or not, but with the timeline we’re looking at, Blade took you to the storehouse directly from your clinic parking lot.”

  “Well, that’s good to know since I hate the fact that I don’t remember every moment.” She looked at everyone who was clearly trying not to look at her directly and was grateful that Walker had kept her medical status private. He was a Healer, not a doctor, and she didn’t know the rules. “He didn’t violate me that way, even during the times I don’t remember.”

  Every single person relaxed marginally, even Max by her side.

  “I woke up in the storehouse,” she continued, needing to get the story over with. “He’d chained me to a chair, but loosely. I don’t know if he wanted me to think I could get out and psych myself out about it or if he was that stupid.”

  “I wouldn’t put it past him either way,” Kameron mumbled, and that made her snort.

  “That was my thinking too, and I don’t even know him as well as you do. Anyway, he went on and on about how I was going to help him finish his grand plan.” She tried to tell them every single word she remembered and was grateful that someone was writing it down so she didn’t have to do it herself. “Then, he came after me, and I tried to get out. Only he dragged me outside.” She closed her eyes, and Max squeezed her hand. She held onto him like a lifeline.

  “You can take a break if you need to,” Max whispered.

  “No, I’m fine. Really. He said he needed the moon to fade but used pretty words that sounded like he’d read them somewhere. Then, he stabbed me with a thin, sharp knife that I think is called a stiletto or something. He got me right under the ribs and punctured my lung, but not my heart or any other vital organ.” She put her hand over where the wound had been, the wound that she no longer bore.

  “I thought I was dead. Then, he took this stone I hadn’t seen before and put my blood on it. I know he said some other things, but I don’t remember them. I just know he left me there to die and took the stone that felt of power away. I don’t know what it was or what it will do, but I know it means bad news for the Packs—and maybe the whole world. He used my blood to do something, and I have no idea what it means.”

  They had her describe the stone, and she gestured for a pad of paper and pen, drawing what she remembered to the best of her abilities. She wasn’t the best artist, but she’d done enough anatomy diagrams in her life to know her way around paper and a pencil.

  “Before we get into the whys and whats of what happened, there’s something we need to talk about.” Gideon pinched the bridge of his nose as he spoke.

  You’re healed,” Walker said. “I didn’t have to Heal you. And from what Max said, you weren’t healed when he got there.”

  “I don’t know what happened,” she said quickly.

  Max sighed. “I tried to change her.” He looked at Cheyenne. “I’m sorry for not giving you a choice, sorry for all the pain I caused. But I couldn’t let you die like that, and the only thing I knew that could possibly help was to force the shift. I took your choice away and broke the law. All the laws for that matter. And for that, I’m so damn sorry.”

  “Don’t be sorry,” she put in, aware the others were looking at them. “I was thinking as you were doing it that I knew you were going to feel like this was all your fault and you’d have guilt. But you shouldn’t. I probably would have done the same thing in your position. I would do anything to keep the people around me healthy and alive. So, I get why you did it, and though I don’t know what choice I would have made if there had been one, I’m gla
d you tried.” She paused, looking down at herself. “Though it didn’t really work out as planned. Did it?”

  “I don’t know who healed you or who Healed you, but I have an idea,” Max said, completely ignoring her other words, and for that, she was grateful. That was something they’d have to talk about later in private. Or bury and not talk about at all. She wasn’t sure which one she preferred.

  “The moon goddess,” Gideon added, his voice a growling whisper. “You think it was her.”

  “She’s the only one I know that has that kind of power, the ability to heal someone completely like it never happened and create a mating bond.” Max looked into Cheyenne’s eyes, and she didn’t blink. “That’s not how mating works, and yet…”

  “And yet…here we are.”

  “Here we are.”

  “So, what does it all mean?” Dhani asked, thankfully cutting the tension not only in the room but also between Cheyenne and Max.

  “I thought the mating bonds were fixed?” Leah asked, leaning into her mate, Ryder. “With everything that has happened, I thought they were back to what they were before the changes.”

  When, through no fault of their own, the Talons not only added new blood to the Pack but also magical and nonmagical elements, the moon goddess had pulled back from the mating bonds. Apparently, before, one saw another and knew who their mate was. Sometimes, it took a few years for their wolves to get to know each other and become the people they needed to be before they were ready to mate, but it always showed up.

  That hadn’t been the case recently, and not until Walker and Aimee somehow fixed it for everyone else did people start to sense their future mates again.

  “I mean, I felt the potential mating bonds,” Dhani put in. “Even when I probably shouldn’t have because I was human at the time.”

  Kameron leaned over and kissed his mate’s temple. “You were a witch, even then. And once the magic was back in place, I felt the bonds.”

  Max growled next to Cheyenne, and she leaned in to him. “The way the bonds can be sensed might be fixed for some, but they clearly weren’t for everyone.” He paused, his brow furrowed. “Or maybe it was just me.”

  She hated that he constantly set himself apart from the others, and not just in this instant. No, she’d seen him do it long before this. When they’d first met, he would stand in a corner, away from the others. Watching. Listening. But never participating.

  Not knowing what else to do, Cheyenne put her hand on his arm, bringing his attention to her. “Or, it could have been me.”

  Once again, there was silence, and she cleared her throat.

  “Anyway…” She paused. “I don’t know what’s going to happen with that, and, well…I need to think.”

  Max leaned forward. “And that’s something between me and Cheyenne anyway. The important thing to discuss within this group is what we’re going to do about Blade and this…artifact of his. What is it, and what does it do?”

  Gideon nodded. “We’ll have a Pack meeting. The den needs to know what’s out there, and with so many of us—including the elders—someone might actually know what Blade is holding.”

  “That’s true,” Kameron put in. “Contrary to belief, we don’t actually know everything about everything.”

  Cheyenne held back a smile, the fact she’d almost smiled at all right then surprising her, when Dhani rolled her eyes at her mate.

  “We’ll have to be cautious,” Brie put in, holding her mate’s hand. Gideon seemed so large next to his mate, not just in stature, but in presence, but Brie didn’t back down. Cheyenne had to remember that. “There have been so many dramatic shifts and changes in the Pack in recent years that some are scared. Uneasy. We’re long-lived and, sometimes, those who have lived even longer than those in this room can’t handle the changes like we can. It scares them,” she repeated. “And scared shifters can lead to things we might not be ready for.” She winced after she said it. “I don’t mean they need to be cautious of you, Cheyenne.”

  Cheyenne nodded. “But they might see me as a symbol for all that change—or even any of us who have joined the Pack recently. Because they can’t see Blade and the Aspens in person, those who aren’t on the front lines won’t know where to direct their confusion and anger.”

  Cheyenne had taken enough psychology classes in college that she had the bare basics down and a fascination with the study outside of her veterinary medicine.

  Max didn’t move or even lean into her, but she knew that he was somehow closer to her, as if she felt his wolf wanting to protect her. She didn’t know why she knew that, and perhaps it had to do with the new, tentative bond between them, but for some reason, she knew she could relax just a fraction because he was near. It was a weird thing to feel after so many years of forcing herself not to rely on anyone, not even her friends that she loved and would sacrifice anything for.

  “You’ll be safe here,” Gideon said, and it was a pronouncement. “I don’t know how the bond snapped into place, but it did. You’re Pack. I can feel your presence within the threads, and soon, the others who have power will, as well. If they don’t already.”

  Walker cleared his throat. “I do. That’s why I was able to tell there was something different with the Healing.”

  Cheyenne nodded, knowing she looked calm and cool, though inside, she was anything but.

  “Cheyenne is tired, and, frankly, so am I,” Max said suddenly, and she turned to him, wondering why he was speaking for her. She didn’t question him though because she was in a room full of people she knew but which she was also on the periphery of. She wasn’t about to make a scene when everyone was already focused on her too much as it was. She’d find her place and figure out what was coming soon, but for now, she’d let Max talk.

  “Pack meeting tomorrow,” Gideon said.

  “The elders will be there,” Ryder added.

  “Then we will be, too.” Max stood up and held out his hand. “Come on. It’s been a long day.”

  The others moved around, standing up and talking amongst each other, some leaving to go pick up their children from the sitter or wherever they were. Cheyenne placed her hand in Max’s and stood up, wondering why her fingers tingled when he let go, as if her skin missed his already. It didn’t make any sense, and, once again, it reminded her that she wasn’t prepared for this magic and the paranormal life she suddenly found herself immersed in.

  Dhani, Aimee, and Dawn each hugged her close, surrounding her in a group like they always did when one of them needed it or when the others thought they needed it.

  “Come, stay at my house,” Dhani said.

  “Or mine,” Aimee and Dawn added together.

  She knew the three were worried about what had just happened and, frankly, so was Cheyenne. But, for some reason, she couldn’t stay with them. She needed to figure out why part of her yearned for Max, even though he was only a few steps away. Something had changed deep inside her, and she wasn’t sure she was prepared to face it, but she also wasn’t ready to completely ignore it.

  “I’ll be fine,” Cheyenne said after a moment. “I’ll see you all in the morning, but…”

  Dawn met her gaze and nodded. Dawn had been born a wolf and had lived with the idea of the paranormal and magic and everything that came with it for far longer than the rest of them. Of all of Cheyenne’s friends, Dawn would understand. It had been the rest of them who had been forced to learn everything to try and keep up.

  “We’re here if you need us.” Dawn swallowed hard as Cheyenne did the same. “And welcome to the Pack. I just wish it were under better circumstances.”

  Cheyenne knew Dawn meant the kidnapping and attack, but she hadn’t missed the minuscule flinch in the corner of Max’s eye. He masked it well, but he had to think Dawn’s comment was about him and not everything else. Or, maybe, he hadn’t wanted Cheyenne to begin with, and the whole mating thing was a mistake. She needed to sort out her thoughts, and then perhaps she could sort out her feelings. But sh
e couldn’t do any of that if she was standing with her friends who were trying to help. She already felt helpless enough.

  “Thanks,” she said quietly. “I’ll see you in the morning.” Then she moved through the group and towards Max. He held out his hand once again, and she slid her fingers into his, ignoring the tension radiating from him.

  They didn’t speak as they walked out of the house and down the path to where he lived.

  She had no clothes. No toothbrush. She had nothing of her own with her, and yet she was about to stay at Max’s house. Everything had changed, and she had to act as if she was perfectly fine with it. She had no idea what was going to happen with her patients or her home or anything else because she was now irrevocably tied to the Pack and the man beside her—and she didn’t even know him.

  “You’re starting to panic.” Max squeezed her hand as they walked into a small two-story home surrounded by trees. The house looked like a perfect place for a family, as if it had been waiting for the next part of Max’s life.

  Cheyenne had a feeling he’d had it built—or built it himself—before whatever made him look like he was lost happened. The thing that made him the man he was now. Because the Max before the attack had been full of hope, but the man in front of her now looked like he either wanted to hide away or was struggling to keep up.

  Since she felt the same, she couldn’t blame him.

  Cheyenne stood in Max’s living room, noticing that it was clean and free of dust, but it didn’t look like it was used often. It was like a shell of what it had once been.

  “The guest room is upstairs. I don’t really have anything for you to wear, but if one of the women doesn’t bring you something—though, knowing them, they just might bring you a whole suitcase-worth of things—you can sleep in my shirt for the night.” His final words were almost a growl, and it took a moment for her to realize that his wolf liked the idea of her in his clothes. Maybe it had to do with scents and claiming, or perhaps she was too tired to dive too deeply into anything just then.