Little (Trenton Security Book 2)
Page 6
“We need sustenance.” They both grabbed his arms and dragged him to the door.
“Now, let’s see if we can get you out of the friend zone,” Harper said as she squeezed his arm.
He would do just about anything to get Harmon to date him. He wanted to be Harmon’s person.
So Beautiful
The heavy bag swung wildly as he landed punches and tried to clear his mind. His life had changed so much since he’d met Poe and still it was the same. The man was so beautiful and all he wanted to do was touch him every time he saw Poe. His cock hardened when he was with the small man. Sex always ruined everything. No matter how much he wanted to love on Poe, he resisted so that he could just spend time.
“What did that bag do to you?” Lily’s voice amused as she asked.
“I met my person.”
“I know, you called me remember?”
“I told him I was wrong and we were just friends.” He hugged the bag and rested his forehead on it.
“Why the fuck would you do that, Harmon?”
Lily wrapped her small hands around his sides and turned him to face her. He avoided meeting her gaze because he didn’t want to see her disappointment.
“Because sex ruins everything and I don’t want him to get tired of me.”
“Harmon, you look at me, and you don’t lie to me. You know the Trenton rules.”
“I’m not a Trenton.”
He grunted as a small fist connected with his stomach.
“I’m sorry.”
“You never say that to me again, Harmon. I may not have birthed your oversized ass, but you’re my son. Just like with the rest of my fucked-up kids. I ain’t like Peaches, and I ain’t all eloquent and shit like her. I know bad things happened to you before you came to be mine. You were used and discarded.”
He let her lead him to his chair and push him into it; then she sat on his lap.
“Fucking is amazing, visceral and nasty, but what you lack, my son, is intimacy. You’ve never had intimacy.”
“What’s the difference?”
He was always someone’s one-night stand. He knew he wasn’t handsome. He tended to say and do the wrong thing, and he fell so easily for a moment of affection.
“Lucky and Priest had a lot of intimacy before they began a sexual relationship. Intimacy is about touch. Kisses. Allowing yourself to be naked not only physically, but emotionally with someone else. You don’t have to touch someone’s pussy or cock to be physical with someone. It’s embraces, kisses, and touching. Anyone can fuck, Harmon.”
“He’s beautiful, Lily. He’s soft and sweet. Poe wears these cute little bow ties and glasses. I just want to touch him when I see him.”
“Why don’t you ask your young man on a date?”
He thought about lying but knew it wouldn’t fly with Lily. She had a radical honesty philosophy. “I don’t want him to know how much of a fuck up I am.”
“You’re not a fuck up, Harmon. You know I can’t lie, not even to save your feelings.”
“The last man I fucked used me to get to one of my best friend’s boys. He was disgusted by me. Thought I was the weakest link in the team. I was always just the fuck, never the boyfriend. I was thirteen when I lost my virginity, and someone paid me for it.”
Lily’s soft hands took his face and forced him to look at her. “You did things to survive. There’s not a lot of ways to make your way on the streets. You have to eat. Put a roof over your head. Those men and women who paid you for your body were wrong in what they did. You were a child. I don’t care how tall you were or how old you looked. They committed a crime.”
“I just wanted to be allowed to touch, Lily. Just hold someone and pretend they were mine. The tricks weren’t always at fault.”
She kissed his right cheek then the other—brushed her lips to his lashes.
“Your biological mother left you. From what you’ve told me about what you can remember you weren’t even allowed the most basic affection.” Lily brushed a kiss to his forehead. “You were sent to overfilled foster homes and group homes with overwhelmed staff. You weren’t taught appropriate touch.” She hugged him tightly around his neck and pressed her lips to his temple. “When your person comes along, they will understand what you need, and you’ll have to let them know your limits. A date doesn’t need to end in the bedroom or wherever. It’s a kiss or hug outside the restaurant or at your date’s door.”
“I’ve never done that before.”
“Hey, I’ve never fucked on a space station before, but we all need goals.”
He leaned in to sniff her breath for alcohol and arched his brow. “Space station?”
“I know, I know, I think I read an article that men can’t get it up in zero gravity, but nothing wrong with my man’s tongue.”
There was banging on his door, and he shot a panicked look toward it.
“Did anyone follow you?”
“Dude, you know I’m carrying. I made like three U-turns at different turnarounds. Do you think I’m stupid?” He eased her off his lap and stood.
He grabbed the remote off his newly broken coffee table. Lily and him had a bit of an accident the other night. From what he remembered, there was some dancing and some questionable food choices.
He hit the button and listened to the creak of the heavy metal doors. He froze in place as Poe appeared. He was wearing a white dress shirt and a sunny yellow bow tie. He curled his fingers into his palms as the barely controlled urge to touch sent heat infusing his gut.
“You weren’t answering your phone, and I got worried.”
He didn’t know what to say, no one outside of his friends ever worried about him. It was…weird. He cleared his throat and tried to find his voice. “I’m fine.”
“Oh my fake baby Jesus, please say I can watch.”
He nudged Lily and then wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
“Poe, this is the sweet and always appropriate Lily.”
His adorable face brightened, and he stepped inside. “Oh, hi, Harmon has told me so much about you.”
“He’s so fucking cute. I’ll trade you.”
The almost maniacal edge to her voice made him nervous, and he held tighter to Lily to keep the woman beside him. Lily in attack mode was going to scare Poe off.
“Thank you, I think.”
“My son has told me so much about you. But he didn't say how adorable you were though. Do you smoke?”
“No, but I appreciate the offer.”
“They can't all be perfect I guess. I'm going to be headed out. I expect Poe and you for Sunday dinner. No excuses.”
He grinned as she grabbed his cheeks and pulled him down for a kiss. She hugged his neck tight and pressed her lips to his ear.
“I love you, Harmon, more than my own fucked-up biological spawn.”
“Love you too, Lily.”
“You did good, son.” She patted his face.
He rolled his eyes as she grabbed Poe in a tight hug and the man looked ready to panic. Then he noticed she was squeezing Poe’s ass.
“Time for you to go.”
He picked Lily up by the waist and rescued Poe from the handsy woman. Lily gave him the cutest pout and batted her long blonde lashes at him.
“But just a minute longer, he was starting to like…”
“Bye, Mama.”
He laughed as tears filled her eyes and he hit the button to close the doors.
“You called me…”
When the heavy metal doors slid into place blocking Lily, he turned to Poe. The man stood there with a sweet smile curving his mouth, and he wanted to taste the beautiful lines with his tongue. He drove the thoughts away with the memories of all the men and women who came before Poe. He’d finally found the only person he didn’t truly want to give up. Sex with Poe would end their time together too soon.
“Wasn't that a bit rude, Harmon?”
“I can open the door and let her rub on you some more.”
Poe step
ped closer and looked up at him. Poe had his head tilted as if the little man were studying him. “That's quite all right. I made dinner. I left it in the car, would you like to eat with me?”
“I'm going to jump in the shower. Here's the remote.” He handed the remote to Poe and let his fingertips brush over Poe’s with the exchange.
The man’s skin was soft, and the sweetest scent wafted up to him. It was a hint of vanilla with the spiciness of ginger. He almost leaned down to place his nose to Poe’s neck just to inhale and memorize it.
“You trust me with the remote for the inner sanctum?”
He reached out to take the remote back, and Poe playfully jumped back, hiding the remote behind him.
“No, no, no, Harmon, go take your shower, and I’ll run outside and get dinner. Do you think she’s gone?”
“If I know Lily, she’s probably still out there with her ear pressed to the door hoping to hear the sounds of sex.”
“That’s a bit disturbing.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. She’s your mom.”
“She’s my friend. The best I ever had.”
Lily was like a present he’d never expected. Not only was she his best friend, but she’d also shown him what a mother should be—loving and present. A person without judgment who loved him despite his many failings.
“I can see that. Go get cleaned up.”
Poe’s soft hands pushed against his chest, and he wanted to lean in and arch his back. Feel Poe’s fingers running through the hair on his chest. He had quite a few dreams recently of Poe loving on him—filling him. He hadn’t bottomed since he was seventeen and got off the streets with the help of Linus.
The man stepped away too quickly, and he practically jogged to the second floor where his bedroom was. He stripped as his mind went to Poe and that the man would be downstairs waiting for him.
What Had He Gotten Himself In To?
He let himself back into the warehouse and closed the doors behind him. The loud click of the lights that followed his progression wasn’t as jarring as it was the first few times he was there. He hoped Harmon liked what he made for dinner. Cooking wasn’t his strong suit. His parents always had a cook and housekeeper, and he’d never had to learn to fend for himself.
But there was one thing everyone said he made well. He set out the baking dish of chicken Parmesan, a bowl of salad and a container with breadsticks. With everything on the rickety, 70’s style table with cracked corners, he strode to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of apple juice.
His hands tightened around the bottles as Harmon appeared in the kitchen. Harmon wore an unbuttoned white dress shirt and faded low-slung jeans. The man’s forearms flexed as Harmon scrubbed a towel over his hair.
“I would’ve helped.”
“No need. I had everything ready. Do you have plates and silverware? I didn’t bring those.”
“Yeah.” Harmon tossed the towel into a clothes basket nearby.
He couldn’t resist watching the way Harmon moved. Harmon was graceful and relaxed, like a man who didn’t have a care in the world. Harmon didn’t rush about.
“I’m curious about you.”
“Is that why you brought me dinner…bribes?”
Harmon shot him a grin over his broad shoulder and then turned with plates in hand. “Sit.”
He did as Harmon asked and waited. Harmon placed the plates and silverware on the table, then took his own seat. He nearly protested as Harmon started to button his shirt.
“You don’t talk much about yourself. You’re always asking questions about me or talking about other people. Is there a reason you don’t want to tell me?”
“I’m just not all that interesting.”
“I don’t think that’s true. Tell me everything.”
“Everything is a lot.”
“Start at the beginning, what’s your first memory?”
“I think it was my mother leaving me behind at the social services office. I think I may have been five or six.”
He wasn’t so much horrified by what his mother did but by the lack of emotion in Harmon’s voice. His impassive expression as if it hadn’t meant anything—that it was expected.
“I’m sorry.” He hadn’t known what else to say.
“It was a long time ago.”
Harmon didn’t say anything else as he watched Harmon make his plate first before making one for himself.
“Tell me the good parts. I don’t want you sad. How did you come to work for Linus?”
“Long story short, he found out about certain skills that I have, he took advantage of and paid me quite well for them. When I turned eighteen, he hired me on with the old company he worked for before he started his own. I moved here when he started Trenton Security.”
That was the most Harmon ever talked about himself, and he was kind of shocked the big man let that much out. Harmon seemed guarded. From the small amount of information Harmon shared, he’d pieced together that Harmon’s life wasn’t easy and probably still wasn’t. A part of him wanted to make the adorable man happy.
“But you didn’t meet Lily until you went to get a tattoo done by Lucky?”
“Yeah, Linus went through this phase where he didn’t spend much time with his family. I was always curious because you learn stuff. Sitting around bullshitting with the guys and stories get told. Linus sounded like his family annoyed him, but they seemed downright perfect to me. When Lucky took me to see Lily, I already felt like I knew her.”
“Meant to be.”
“I guess so.”
They ate in silence, and he chuckled as Harmon told him how good everything was after every bite.
“Why do you live in a warehouse? It seems like a lot of space.”
“I was homeless for most of my teens. I squatted in an abandoned warehouse in the town where I grew up in Mississippi. It was a poor place, so there wasn’t a lot of money to tear down or remodel in the small industrial section. For some reason, I liked the space. The walls never closed in on me. When I moved here, and I saved up enough, I saw this place, and I wanted it. It was in bad shape, but it was better than living in my van or crashing at Lily’s place. Some habits don’t ever go away.”
“I like all the space. My place is tiny. I rent this garage apartment. People ask when I’m going to buy a house or whatever. I just haven’t found one to make me want to commit.”
“What do you do? I don’t think I ever asked.”
“Oh, I work at an Atlanta research firm. Mostly, people contact us to investigate art and antiques. Some genealogy projects. Someone always wants to know if they’re related to royalty.”
“You don’t work in town.”
“No, most of my time is spent working remotely, but occasionally I stay in Atlanta to take care of anything I can’t do from home.”
“Wouldn’t it be easier to just live there?”
“Probably, but I came here to research family history, and I fell in love with the place. Also, the distance from my family works for me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Oh, it’s nothing tragic. My parents and sister are very outgoing and athletic. Marathons. Charity events. Very much the life of the rich and famous, or Atlanta royalty. I’m just not very outgoing, and they worry.”
“Oh,” Harmon uttered that one syllable and then lowered his gaze to the table.
Even as the man tried to hide it, Harmon’s insecurity was blatantly on display. For a man as handsome as Harmon was, he didn’t think much about himself. That made him sad.
He just softly called Harmon’s name and waited for the big man to look at him. The man's beautiful green eyes met his, and he forced a soft smile to ease Harmon’s tension.
“Talk to me.”
“I like you.”
He didn’t know how he felt about the misery that stained those three words.
“I like you too. So what's wrong?”
Harmon didn’t speak just seemed to choke down the r
est of his food, and he did the same. He stood and started to clear the table. He froze with the plates in his hands as Harmon grabbed his hips. He dropped them back onto the table with a clang and let the big man tug him down onto his lap. Harmon’s fingertips stroked across his cheek.
“You smell so sweet.” Harmon’s voice broke.
He closed his eyes as the tip of Harmon’s nose moved along his jaw and down to the side of his neck. A shiver worked through him.
“So soft.”
He felt a tug on his bow tie, and then Harmon started to work the buttons of his shirt loose.
“May I just touch you?”
He turned his head, his mouth met Harmon’s, and the man’s scruff was rough against his smoother skin. He realized with awe that he wasn’t the only one shaking. Harmon’s breath roughly shuddered over his lips. Harmon held himself so tense that his muscles strained and shook.
“Poe, please.”
Something about the begging tone tinged with too much desperation broke him. Harmon shouldn’t believe he had to plead for affection or the right to touch. As far as he was concerned, everything he was belonged to Harmon.
“Yes.”
Harmon’s big hand slipped under the soft linen of his shirt. Harmon squeezed and stroked, pinched his nipples. The man didn’t hurry. It was almost as if Harmon savored the moments as if that would be the only time he’d allow Harmon to touch him. He wanted more than a make-out session or some one-night stand. They’d only known each other a few months, but he felt closer to Harmon than he had to anyone else in his life.
Taking chances hadn’t always worked in his favor, but he didn’t want to bypass the possibility of a relationship with Harmon because he was scared of ruining a friendship. He’d seen the interest and heat in Harmon’s eyes as the man studied him. Noticed all the aborted attempts at touching him. Harmon had reached out to him so many times only to stop himself and pull away in every way. The emotional retreat hurt him the most.
“I love touching. Do you want to touch me?”