Dreams of a Wild Heart

Home > Other > Dreams of a Wild Heart > Page 6
Dreams of a Wild Heart Page 6

by Danube Adele


  “What if I don’t want all the guys chasing after me?”

  Henry’s eyes narrowed on me thoughtfully. “Then you should think about why you don’t.”

  I’m not eighteen, I argued inwardly. “Let’s get going. See you in a few weeks, Kev.” We started down the hall.

  “Hey, Ceci?” Kevin waited until I turned around before cleverly pointing out, “He wasn’t actually a patient, now was he?”

  Chapter Three

  At least it wasn’t a yeast infection. My cousin would have insisted on clearing a table and having me do a pap smear.

  “Ceci! Listen, I was hoping you’d come. I have this problem that’s bothering me. My hip is sore.” Stephanie twisted her slender hips back and forth a few times, her fitted, burgundy sheath swishing with the movement, like she was doing the twist, and winced. “Do you think I tore something?”

  She’d managed to snag me as I came through the door of the restaurant. After giving Henry a quick hug, she shooed him away in order to tell me what her problem was this week. Like Henry would be at all surprised by anything she had to say.

  I smothered my grin and replied, “I don’t know, Steph. What have you been up to lately? When did it start hurting?”

  Her green eyes, mirrors of my own, lit up as she got into storytelling mode. “Well, you know Andrew, right? We’ve been together for the last year, and I’m just sure he’s about to propose, but don’t say anything, okay?”

  I assured her, “Of course not. I won’t say anything.”

  “Anyway, Andy and I were really getting it on, you know?”

  “You were having sex?” I clarified.

  “More than that. We were having sex like porn stars. Seriously, when we do it, it looks really good. We’re thinking of filming ourselves.”

  Good God, no. I resisted the shudder of dread and instead warned, “You know that can get on the internet, right? Go viral? It would ruin a career before it even gets started.” Accidentally running across a video of my cousin having sex was the last thing I wanted.

  She laughed. “We’d delete it right after. Anyway, we were getting it on, and I moved my hip the wrong way. Do you think it’s sprained or something?”

  “How long has it been hurting?”

  “Since last night.”

  “Give it a couple more days and see if it doesn’t get better. Try not to tweak it anymore. No more porn-star sex until it’s better.”

  Andrew, a dead ringer for Andrew McCarthy, suddenly came up from the parking lot with a quiet smile and a bouquet of roses in his hand, likely for my parents. “Hi, Ceci.” He nodded briefly before turning to Stephanie. After studying her face for a moment, he frowned. “You told her, didn’t you?”

  Her eyes rounded innocently, a small smile curling her lips, but she said nothing. It was totally cute, though, and he was having trouble staying annoyed. A deep, heartfelt sigh later, he looked at me.

  “Christ.” Blushing a becoming shade of pink, he grabbed Stephanie’s hand and started tugging her away. She resisted for a moment.

  “But she’s a doctor,” Stephanie protested.

  “Can’t some things be private?” he muttered.

  Not in our family. I shared a grin with Stephanie, knowing she was likely thinking the same thing as she followed her man.

  She quickly called over her shoulder. “Better watch yourself. My mom told me that Grandma wants to talk to you. Oh! And Cassie invited her boyfriend’s best friend to this thing to try and set you up. She thinks he’s really hot.” Stephanie shook her head, mouthing he’s not.

  “Thanks for the warning.”

  Now I knew to be on guard. The cousins were good like that. We’d developed a tsunami warning system for when my grandmother was on the warpath. It wouldn’t divert the tidal wave, but we could start battening down the hatches.

  Casa Margarita was the restaurant where my family held all of their big important parties. It was up on the side of a hill, giving a beautiful view of the valley. On a clear day, it was possible to not only see the Pacific Ocean, but also the outline of Catalina Island.

  Music from the Gipsy Kings with a sassy, Latin beat spiced the air in the banquet room as I stepped through the archway and felt the rhythm hit my spirit. Music was one of my things. Dancing was one of my things. My feet naturally picked up the rhythm and worries from the day seemed to slide away. The dance floor was busy with all familiar faces, which gave me a feeling of contentment and peace. A din of conversation, peppered with outbursts of laughter, underscored the music while good smells filled the air, peppered and savory. This was home. They made the world feel just right. I could feel the day’s pain start to slide away.

  “Ceci! You made it!”

  “Hello, sweetheart!”

  “How are you, sweetie? So nice to see you!”

  My aunts attacked on sight.

  I was engulfed in loving hugs, smacking kisses and perfumes that were sure to cling to my clothes for the rest of the night, all belonging to my three gorgeous aunts, who were looking spectacular in their elegant evening wear. They were my mother’s sisters, the official greeters, making sure everyone got their table numbers right, had enough food and were enjoying themselves. Half of what was being said to me was in rapid-fire Spanish as they slipped back and forth between the two languages naturally. I don’t speak a lot of Spanish since my mom married my dad, who’s a white guy without any second language skills, and we spoke mostly English at our house, but still, the musical roll of the language was familiar to my ear and only added to my feeling of home.

  Coming out of the perfume cloud, I said, “Where are my parents?”

  “Right here, baby!” My mom came at me from the dance floor looking happy and excited to see me, my father following behind with his own special smile for me.

  “Aren’t they just gorgeous together?” Auntie Suzi enthused.

  “They are.”

  My mom was rocking an adorable cap-sleeved number in a shade of green that matched her eyes. The material gathered just below her breasts and draped over her Pilates-toned physique. My dad was a younger version of Robert Redford, but with darker hair. They both looked so healthy and happy.

  “You look beautiful,” I told her, pressing my cheek to hers.

  “Doesn’t she?” Auntie Suzie seconded. “I’d have to hate her if she wasn’t my sister.”

  Mom wrapped me in a hug. “It’s been too long. You need to come visit more. We miss you, sweetheart.”

  “C’mere, punkin,” my dad said gruffly, then gave me a bear hug. “Work treating you right?”

  “It’s good.”

  “You’re looking thin, Ceci.” My mom brushed hair off my shoulder and straightened the spaghetti strap there. It warmed my heart. “You need to take better care of yourself. Did you eat anything today?”

  “A few bites. It got busy.”

  My Auntie Monina stroked my hair and cupped my cheek. “Yes, eat, Ceci! We ordered some wonderful food. Get yourself a plate m’hijita.”

  “I will. I’m going to find Henry first.”

  “Ahh, here’s Grandpa!” My mom gave her father a quick squeeze as he came off the dance floor, having just danced a number with my cousin Bailey. “We finally got her here, Dad.”

  “Hold her! Don’t let her escape before she gives her grandpa a dance.”

  I grinned. “Sorry, guys. The hours are crazy. I come to Sunday dinner when I can.”

  “You tell them you need to take time for yourself, baby. You need to take care of yourself.” Other relatives would always call me “baby,” and I was absolutely okay with that. It was my relationship within the family, just like I called all of my baby cousins the same thing. We took care of each other. It was our way.

  “I will,” I promised. Maybe over the course of
the next two weeks, I could meet up with them for dinner.

  “You have time for an old guy?” My lovely grandfather’s hair was snow white, and he appeared thin, but looks could be deceiving. His blue eyes shone brightly, and he was spry, ready to cut a rug.

  “Anytime, Grandpa.”

  “Let’s do it, then.”

  “I’ll see you guys in a bit, Mom.”

  Slinging the strap of my shoulder bag over my head diagonally, I let my grandpa propel me in a merengue.

  “I wanted to dance with my best girl.” My grandpa said it every time, and every time, I loved to hear it.

  And I always replied, “I thought Grandma was your best girl.”

  To which he whispered, “Don’t tell her I said so.”

  I chuckled.

  “How was work today?”

  “Hard,” I said, losing some of my smile. For some reason, my grandpa’s was a healing energy. I could only ever tell him the truth. And I knew he wouldn’t make more of an issue of something than it was. With a sad smile, seeing the young woman’s face in my mind, I admitted, “It was a hard day.”

  “You lose someone, baby?”

  “Yeah,” I nodded. “There was nothing I could do, which doesn’t usually bother me, but it just reminded me that things happen, and they can never go back the way they were. Never.”

  My grandpa did his Obi Wan thing where he looked into my soul for a few quiet moments and nodded, as though he understood something I wasn’t aware of. “Things change, sweetheart. It’s not always pretty, and it doesn’t always feel good, but things change. Sometimes tragically. The best thing you can do is embrace it, direct it, see where it takes you.”

  “Right.” I frowned at his response and tried to go back to my doctor face. “I mean, she was still in shock, so it just didn’t seem like the right time for, you know, counseling.”

  He shook his head, like I was heading east on a north/south street. He didn’t believe in a spoonful of sugar, but more of a knock upside the head to get it on straight. “Your feelings are yours, baby girl, not hers. She didn’t make you have these feelings. That was all you. The situation brought up your own pain, and that is something you need to handle. When change becomes your friend, you will change, your life will change, and it will become something wonderful that you brought to yourself. Change is healthy.”

  I couldn’t go there. On the outside, I nodded as though in understanding, but on the inside was a whirling dervish of emotion. There was truth to his words, and I knew he was referencing Carlos’s death, which was why an acute, stinging pain spread through my chest. My throat started to close on me. I was having trouble breathing. A panic attack? What the hell? I had to keep it together so my grandpa wouldn’t worry.

  I tried to breathe deeply, slowly, thinking about my bronchial tubes relaxing. Breathe in. Breathe out. It worked instantly, so I managed a smile, like everything was okeydokey, and said, “You are wise.”

  His wide grin healed some of the sting. I doubted it would ever go away completely. “Wise? Sometimes. Other times I don’t get wind of the day’s agenda soon enough and find myself painting the damn bathroom for your grandmother.”

  A chuckle eased from my chest and the sting faded.

  We danced at a comfortable pace, and I rested my head on his shoulder, not really paying attention to the music anymore. My grandpa rested a hand on the back of my head and comfort was given and received. I knew what he was saying. I could wish all I wanted that things had turned out differently for me, but it would yield the same results—nada, nothing, zilch. But I didn’t know what to do about it, didn’t know how to move on in my life. This was all theoretical. What was the practical?

  He pulled away, and by the look on his face, I could see there was late breaking news. He said, “I also wanted to tell you Grandma’s looking to have serious words with you. Something having to do with not being able to die in peace until she knows you’re happy.”

  “Is she dying?” I asked with some alarm. “Does she have a problem? No one told me.”

  He chuckled. “We’re all dying a little bit every day, sweetheart, but if you’re asking about her health, she’s as strong as an ox. She’s going to outlive all of us. You know how stubborn she is.”

  “I know.” Just more of the same. I could relax. My grandmother was stubborn and wonderful. She could also be a scary, prophetic old woman with eerie foresight. We always needed to brace ourselves when she got a bead on us.

  My grandpa spun me this way, did a fancy little step that way, and put me into a deep dip that had me laughing. We raced the merengue across the floor against my uncle and aunt and nearly beat them there. When the song ended, he bowed very formally, and I gave him my best curtsy.

  “Now, go see your grandma. Take your medicine like a big girl.”

  “I will, Grandpa, but I think I’d like to eat first. Build my strength up.” Right on cue, Henry reappeared, a mischievous smile on his face.

  “Hey Pop-pop.” He hugged our grandfather. “I need to steal her for just a moment.”

  “She’s all yours, m’hijo. It’s time for this old man to get a drink. Grandma isn’t watching, is she?”

  “You’re all clear, Pops.” Henry grinned, doing a quick scan of the room.

  Henry waited until my grandfather was a few feet away before whispering, “Run while you can. Tell everyone you’re being called back to the hospital. Grandma is on the hunt! She’s been watching out for you all night. Cassie just told me.”

  “All night? Please.”

  “You think I’m kidding. I’m not. It may already be too late.”

  “Grandma always wants to talk to me. I’m sure she’s going to tell me that I need to settle down and get serious about having children or something.” Still, all these warnings were starting to make me sweat. I looked around the room to see if I could spot her, try to get a sense of things from looking at her facial expression. She wasn’t in the immediate area. Maybe she was in the bathroom. This was the third person who was trying to warn me. What could she have to say?

  “Well, she should be well-greased for you. I spiked her margarita with extra alcohol before taking it to her.”

  “Henry! You’re so bad.”

  His grin was wicked. “What? I do it every time. You know she likes it.”

  “Maybe I could just tell her I’m a lesbian. Would that get her off my back?”

  “Yeah, like permanently. She’d have a heart attack and keel over.”

  “No way. She’s made of sterner stuff that that.”

  “I hope so.” His eyes flashed vulnerability for a brief second. He’d yet to come out to the family, and it was dragging him down. In my heart, I was sure my grandmother already knew. She always seemed to have a freakish sixth sense about things. And God forbid if she ever came to you because of a dream she had that involved you.

  One time, my oldest cousin Veronica had been about to go on a skiing trip up to Mammoth, but in the middle of the night, just before Veronica had been scheduled to leave, my grandmother had called her with a dream. Told her to go the next day. Told her not to get in the car with her friend, and even made her promise. My cousin listened, thank God, and later in the day we saw there’d been a horrific pileup going up the Grapevine that had involved multiple deaths.

  Of course, she was also the same woman who believed in the evil eye, and she was also the same woman who said it was important to wear something that covered your chest so you wouldn’t catch cold. But then if you did get sick, she was the first to recommend cracking an egg under your bed in a bowl overnight to ward off the evil spirits and the cloying smell of vapor rub to be used liberally over that same chest area because it would magically get rid of the cold. She had no real respect for modern medicine.

  “I’m just trying to warn you. Talking to her about
her Spanish novellas didn’t even distract her today.”

  “Not even asking her why Umberto is chasing after Maria when his own twin brother is engaged to her, and she’s pregnant, but my God, whose baby is it going to be?” I gave him a reassuring smile. “It’ll be fine. It’s not like she’s hiding a shiv or anything. Ready to eat?”

  “For sure.”

  “Good. I’m starving. Let’s grab some food. The day has been a long one.”

  Several of my other family members spotted me—more uncles, cousins, second cousins, baby cousins—and we had to stop several time on my way to the buffet line, which Henry went on to scope out without me. More hugs and kisses were given. I danced part of a dance with one of my littlest cousins, Meli, who was barely turning seven and loved me to pieces. The feeling was mutual. She was so girly in her baby blue ballerina dress with beaded barrettes in her black hair, I just wanted to eat her up. She was also the only girl born in a whole passel of darling boys in our new generation of kidlets coming up.

  “Did you save a person’s life today?” She was holding one of my hands and trying to mimic my steps. Excitement lit her green eyes from the inside as she was able to follow me. I was also moving particularly slowly to give her a chance to see the steps. I did this every time and she always got better and better.

  “I did.”

  Meli gave me her dimpled smile with a dash of hero worship mixed in, and my heart melted. She suddenly stopped dancing and jerked upright, suddenly remembering something. “I colored a picture for you.”

  “You did? Where is it?”

  “Mommy has it.” She took off from the middle of the dance floor. I followed to where my oldest cousin, Corinne, was eating with her husband and toddler. I gave quick hugs, and Corinne fished the picture out of her purse.

  Meli took it and handed it to me. “See? It’s a rainbow, and that’s you sitting on it.”

  I smiled at the stick figure drawing of myself. I had long black crayon hair and huge green eyes that were almost larger than my face. I was wearing a white lab coat, and what looked like a tongue depressor was in my hand. “How lovely! I get to sit on the rainbow.”

 

‹ Prev