Dreams of a Wild Heart

by Danube Adele

  “My mother died giving birth to me.”

  “Did you tell the other doctor about this?”

  “He asked, but I wasn’t ready to talk about it yet.”

  Must fight exasperation. “Knowing your family’s history is important. When we’re born, we can inherit the same traits, both good and bad, from our families. For example, heart disease can run in families. If we know the history, we can try to do preventative medicine, which helps keep people from getting sick.”

  “I...” Again, he paused and looked down at the table. I wasn’t sure he was going to finish his thought, except then he looked up at me again. “I have fallen unconscious a time or two.”

  “Unconscious? Can you tell me about that?”

  “It was after dinner. Tabron was the one who discovered this. The other warriors simply thought I was being an old fool, nodding off in the middle of eating, but Tabron realized I wasn’t responding to him. He remained with me, getting Bruner to help bring me to my rooms.”

  “That’s serious.”

  “I also have this.” He pulled his robe up to reveal his feet.

  “Oh, Ral’e.” My eyes bugged for a moment. One of his toes was completely blackened. “What... How long...”

  “It’s been getting worse for some time.”

  “Christ, Ral’e. That tissue looks dead.” I knelt down for a better look. I could see that his entire foot was becoming discolored, a slightly purple hue, but his second toe in particular was outright black. It looked like the images of frostbite on extreme mountain climbers who were exposed too long.

  “Did you injure yourself?”

  “I might have, but I don’t remember anything specific.”

  “Can you feel this?” I gently poked his foot with my pencil in various places, the top, the ankle, and finally his calf, where he told me he could feel. “But the rest is numb? You can’t feel?”

  “Just some pressure.”

  “What about your other leg?”

  “It’s beginning to have strange sensation.”

  “Like tingles?”

  He nodded.

  I sat back and looked down at his foot for a few quiet minutes and thought about all the symptoms he’d discussed. The other doctor had mentioned in the journal he left behind that he figured the king was diabetic. I had to agree.

  “I need to do some research on all that you’ve told me, but I think you have a problem with your insulin, which breaks down the sugars in your body. The condition is known as diabetes.”

  “I’ve heard that before.” The king sighed. “Something having to do with too much sugar in my blood? Something like that.”

  “Right. Your body would normally be able to metabolize the sugar in your blood by secreting a chemical called insulin. For whatever reason, this process isn’t working for you anymore. Now, I don’t know how much medicine you have access to, and frankly, I’m not this kind of doctor, so I can only tell you the basics here for pretty well-known treatments. Healthier eating habits and regular exercise are crucial for maintaining good health.”

  “What does that look like?”

  “More fruit and vegetables. More whole foods. I could research that and get back to you. You have to watch your sugar intake, your carbs, like potatoes and breads and such, which turn in to sugar, and your fat. If the food we’ve been eating since I’ve arrived is any indicator of what you normally eat, then there need to be some serious changes to your diet.”

  He didn’t say anything, so I continued with the really bad news.

  “This also puts you at risk for a number of things including something called peripheral arterial disease.”

  His sigh was deep and long. He steepled his fingers across his chest. “What is that?”

  I got up off the floor and faced him. “Basically, it means you aren’t getting enough blood flow to your legs. The tingling sort of precedes the numbness and soon, you might lose feeling in your other leg, too. Other problems can be co-occurring here. Just based on what I’ve seen you eat, you might have plaque built up in your arteries. So many things...stroke, heart attack. Your father could have died from the same conditions.”

  Almost to himself he muttered, “Diet and exercise.”

  “And watch your feet for injury, particularly since you can’t feel them so well anymore. And, your toe has to come off.”

  “No.” There was no equivocation in his tone.

  “The tissues are necrotic, Ral’e. You let this go too long.”

  “No.”

  “It’s a condition called gangrene. It will not only spread and infect healthy tissue, but it will release toxins into your blood stream that will kill you.”

  “No.” Like he was a child. I mean, I understood his reticence, but when someone tells you you’re going to die if not, most people tended to listen.

  “Is this why the other doctor is no longer here? You didn’t want to listen to him either?”

  He was a drowning man, all alone and fighting the hands that were trying to pull him to safety. “There must be something. What else is there?”

  “There is nothing else. Amputation. A surgery that will cost you a toe at the same time that it saves your life.”

  “Thank you for coming in, Doctor Cecilia. We’re done here.”

  I shook my head. “So stubborn. It’s not even your big toe. It’s your second toe. You don’t even need it. We give you a local to completely numb the area, then we safely take it off. However, even with that, if you don’t listen to what I’ve told you, you’re just going to keep getting sicker.”

  “I’m not having you cut pieces of me off.” The paranoia crept back into his eyes. “This is how they do it. A piece at a time. They take and they take and before you know it there’s nothing left of you but a shell that no one bothers with!”

  “Then make sure you tell your son what kind of burial you want. I’m telling you now, you are signing on for a sure death. You don’t keep dead tissue on a live person and expect things to be okay. And you know what, I think you know I’m right, but you’re too scared to face it.”

  “Leave now, Cecilia. I’m finished talking with you.”

  I held up my hands. “It’s your life. I’ll take some time to research proper foods if I can find that information in the medical books downstairs. Maybe there’ll be mention of the medicines you might find success with. Who knows? Maybe you guys could kidnap a pharmacist.” I ended on a note of sarcasm before heading out. “Let me know if I can do anything else for you.”

  That hadn’t gone so well, but truthfully, there was no way it would have gone better.

  Good as my word, I thought I’d occupy myself looking up the known information on diabetes and maybe reading more of the journal the previous doctor left behind. This time, as I walked through the halls, I was careful to peak around corners and see if anyone was waiting for me. From now on, my life was going to be a massive game of cloak-and-dagger. How long would I be able to fly under the radar?

  Been trying to get out and explore when I don’t have Conan the Barbarian and his brother following me around. There are plants and animals that are similar to Earth. Mostly, I’ve encountered birds, small rodents, rats and squirrels. The trees are large and magnificent.

  I hadn’t even taken time to notice the trees in my unknowing mad dash for the cliff. I’d made it to the medical rooms and was sitting comfortably in my chair with the journal. This time, however, I was ready. A syringe of sedative that would normally be used by an anesthesiologist was sitting next to me. Did I question how the drug came to be present in this medieval place? Nope. After learning that people lived on other planets, and that I was in fact on another planet, there was very little left that could surprise me.

  Maybe it was tempting fate to think that. In any case, someone would be in for
a big surprise and a long nap, if they came in to start any trouble with me.

  Been exploring some of the local flora, testing for medicinal purposes. There were some pinelike trees with a blue tinge to their leaves, a faint smell of pine and sage. The leaves were aromatic, but provided no noticeable effect other than making me sick to my stomach. However, the largest trees that have the sycamore-like leaves had effect. A small dose eaten can provide pain relief, a small dose ground up and placed on an open wound relieved pain in the wound and did not create infection, but a large dose eaten created hallucinogenic effects. Need to do more experimentation. The mylunate I’ve experienced has had interesting side effects. An ore that liquefies, molding to any shape it is forced to. It feels as though it finds a way to bind to the mind, strengthening perceptions. Thought projection would be an interesting experiment. Can the wearer of mylunate block thought projection.

  So I’d been right. The other doctor had discovered some of this mylunate and determined that it did turn up the volume on the brain. All of this time, Tabron had been able to see what I was thinking. He could “hear” me, and I was able to respond. But where was the mylunate? Wasn’t it needed for this?

  The doctor had been exploring the area to determine what possible resources might be of further use to the people. It sounded as though he’d learned a lot. It would be interesting to see if Raseen knew about the local plants and what benefit they had.

  “Cecilia! Are you in there?” Tarra entered hesitantly, looking around the space.

  “Here! Back here.” I quickly put the syringe away in the top drawer of the desk. I wanted it to be ready at a moment’s notice.

  “You’re hiding back there!” She smiled, spotting me. Today her dark hair was pulled back into a ponytail with a bright red ribbon woven into the strands. She was wearing what looked to be wide-legged culottes and a fitted shirt. “What are you doing in this dingy place?”

  I closed the journal and set it off to the side again, getting a big stretch in at the same time. “Reading.”

  “We were going to go for a ride, remember?”

  “I forgot, actually. I was with your uncle this morning.” I stood and followed her out of the room. “He’s a frustrating man. There wasn’t anything I told him that he hadn’t already been told by the last doctor, and he’s getting worse.”

  Tarra sighed. “You won’t be able to help him any more than the other doctor could. He doesn’t listen to anyone.” She led us through another part of the palace, one that seemed to head toward the rear of the building.

  “He better listen or things are going to get bad real fast.”

  “Then he’ll die and Morten will take over.” She shuddered. “That would be awful.”

  “It would. He wants to rule the people with fear. I overheard him talking this morning about a family that needs to die.”

  She curled her lip in disdain. It was one of those moments when she appeared to be years older, her eyes shadowing the unhappiness that she kept to herself. “No one will listen to him. No one respects him. Who was the family he wanted killed?”

  “Someone named Wellan. The gist of it was that he wanted the king to make an example of them.”

  Her eyes sharpened. “Wellan, you said? And what did the king say?”

  “He’d think about it. But it seemed more like he was trying to pacify Morten to get him out of his rooms. He’s not well, and seemed to have no energy. I can imagine, at another time in his life, he might have been able to run someone out by the scruff of their neck, but Morten was still trying to argue when I knocked.”

  We’d arrived at a separate building, quaint and well decorated, made in the fashion of the palace with stone, wood and iron embellishments. Flowers hung in front of the double doors where horses were housed. Two had already been made ready for riding and were waiting out front, ground-hitched.

  Tarra had her carefree smile back in place. “I wasn’t sure how good of a rider you are, so I asked them to saddle Sondra, a nice, quiet mare. You shouldn’t have any trouble with her.”

  “Thanks. I appreciate that. Maybe we could walk them until I get used to riding?” I hadn’t been on a horse since I was a teenager, and I hadn’t done more than a few trail rides. Hardly horsewoman material, but I did want to get a better look at the property, and it seemed the only way to move in this barbaric place.

  “Sure. We’ve got lots of fields of wheat and corn back here. Several pens of animals, mostly cows, pigs and chickens.” We moved around the property and she pointed out different areas. There was a small orchard of different fruit trees, and a plot of land that grew different vegetables. Multiple barnlike buildings held a variety of farming materials. I didn’t know much about farming, but I couldn’t help but think there was enough to at least supplement what the people were able to trade for on their own. Which brought me to what I wanted to discuss.

  “Tarra, I need to talk with you.” By the tone of my voice, she saw I was being serious and cocked her head.

  “What is it?”

  “I know I’ve mentioned this to you before, but there are people in the village who are on the verge of death. Children who are so malnourished they may not live to see their next birthdays. There’s a woman who’s pregnant with twins. They need food.”

  “The king will—” She was putting on her “face” again.

  “Tarra, cut it out.”

  “What? What do you mean?”

  My frustration drew a discordant tone in our conversation. “I’ve seen through you. This is not who you are. You are kind. Thoughtful. Please. Talk to me.”

  “How do you know that I’m nice?” She was still trying to remain elusive, but giving herself away with the very question she asked.

  “First of all, you’ve tried to help me with the king in postponing the whole joining thing, and of course all those clothes. But there’s something else you’re doing. I don’t know what it is, but I think it’s dangerous and I think it’s something that will get you in serious trouble if you’re found out. I also have the feeling that you’re helping others.”

  She neither confirmed nor denied. “Why are you bringing this up now? What do you think I can do?”

  “I think we need to find a way to sneak the leftovers from the kitchen to a central location where they can be parceled out to the people.”

  “That’s death for sure.” Tarra’s face grew somber. “I don’t know. I’ll have to think on that.”

  “Can we talk about this another time?”

  “You know if we get caught doing this, they’ll kill you for sure and probably me alongside you.” She looked around at the gardens to see if anyone was near.

  “I’d never say you did anything.” There was no one around, but I made sure to keep a church voice.

  “They have their ways. Their cruel, unbearable ways.” She chuckled without humor. “This place is evil. Getting out of here will be a blessing.”

  Was she leaving?

  Tarra had taken us on a circular tour of the area, putting us back where we started. We came to a stop, and she said she wanted to give her horse a chance to stretch its legs a bit, but I suspected she was going to go off and do more of her clandestine activities. Now I was worried that whatever she was doing might get her killed.

  “I was hoping to get into the forest a bit, maybe explore the plant life. Would that be okay?” I asked before she rode off.

  “Don’t see why not.” She didn’t wait for any further questions before riding off toward the fields. At a much slower pace, I followed, letting Sondra pick her way through the meadow. She was content to plod along, and the truth was, the day was absolutely beautiful, so I let myself enjoy it. The sky was blue, cloudless. I could almost pretend I was on an exciting vacation full of adventure. Almost.

  The leaves were just as the doctor had described. T
aking the risk that I wouldn’t be able to get back on, I ground-hitched the horse and began an exploration. I took a few of the leaves, sniffed them, rubbed them. I meandered through the trees, which allowed me to pick samples. Birds flew by, pecking could be heard in the distance, and I couldn’t believe what a beautiful place this was, and how unfortunate it was that I’d had to learn of it through my own kidnapping.

  Feeling suddenly like I was being watched, my head jerked up to see the golden eyes of the supercharged wolf creature. I froze. He was a dozen feet away, watching me as he had before. Friend? Foe? What now? With my heart pounding fiercely in my throat, I took a step back. It took a step forward. Oh Lord. I took another step back. It took two more steps forward, then sat and let its tongue loll out the side of its mouth. I cocked my head with confusion.

  “Friend?” I murmured, smiling at his silly look. He pawed the air, first with one paw, then the other.

  I took a step forward. The wolf laid its massive body down and set its head between its paws. Was it trying to show me it meant no harm? It was probably stupid of me to try and interpret wolf behavior on an animal that wasn’t really a wolf, but something was telling me this was okay, so I listened. Slowly, I walked toward the creature, giving it plenty of time to run away or growl. It did neither.

  “Hi, sweetheart.” I kept my tone soft and reached out my left hand, my non-surgery hand, just in case it did decide to chomp. “My name is Ceci, and you are very beautiful.”

  The wolf inched closer. I took another step. His tongue lapped at my hand. I sat down carefully, in front of it. It reached its head forward until my hand was resting on top. I started petting it, feeling the silky fur under my fingers. Holy cow. Was this really happening? The wolf flopped over suddenly, offering its belly, and with a chuckle, I gave its stomach a good rub. Dogs were the same no matter what planet they were on.

  I stopped petting and a pitiful whine sounded, which had me laughing. “Okay, okay. But don’t get used to this.” Though, I didn’t mind in the least. I gave the beautiful wolf a good scratching with my nails in the thickest part of his fur.