Passing Through Darkness- The Complete Cycle

by Malcolm McKenzie

  “Dammit, Dee, that’s what I just tried to do! The head bit me!”

  For the first time, I let myself glance at the spot where Seven had fallen. Someone had cleaned up, buried or burned the remains. The grass was starting to turn brown. I supposed some part of the fallen Hellguard’s fluids had been acidic, unless it was an effect of the Darkness itself.

  Dee was still smiling. I really wanted to hit him.

  “When you strike off a serpent’s head, do you aim the blow at the head itself? Or just behind it?”

  I growled, “You’ve lost me.”

  “You’re something of a student of Yoshana. When she first moved against Prophetess, did she attack her directly?”

  “You mean when she tried to turn me?”

  “Exactly. The ideal pressure point may be neither the leader herself, nor the great mass of her followers. Yoshana attacked Prophetess through you. Similarly, her pressure point may be her key lieutenants. You told me you believed Roshel held some genuine affection for you. That could be exploited.”

  “Okay, first, which of us is a consequentialist now? That’s pretty low. Second, Roshel worships Yoshana.” I paused, forestalling Dee’s response with a raised finger. “Third, that’s maybe not the worst idea you’ve ever had.”

  I’d heard more than once that Roshel had wanted - and maybe had - a relationship with Grigg, only to be displaced by Yoshana. And if Roshel worshipped her leader with an almost religious fervor, how might that devotion have been shaken when Prophetess turned aside Yoshana’s attack?

  My head still hurt. I needed a new strategy, and I needed it fast, before Yoshana decided she was willing to suffer thousands of losses to crush us once and for all. I didn’t even want to start cataloging the possible flaws in the occultist’s reasoning, but I wanted to sit around waiting for the hammer to fall even less. “All right, Dee. My plan didn’t work. Let’s give yours a try.”

  Of course, the last idea Dee had advocated for was my mission to join Yoshana in the Sorrows. That hadn’t gone well. And I found that I didn’t want any more stains on my conscience. “But I’m not going to ‘exploit’ her affection for me, if there is any. I’m just going to talk to her.”

  “Just so.”

  9. Auld Lang Syne

  I was lying on my cot again, watching the gray fabric of the tent above me darken as the sun went down. I wanted to sleep - preferably for several days - but I couldn’t. Being flat on my back was restful, except when I was distracted by the pain in my face. Which was most of the time.

  Railes hadn’t liked Dee’s plan. He’d berated me all the way down the hill. “What are you going to do, go sneaking off behind enemy lines to set up a date with that Overlord?”

  “Yep.”

  “Do I even need to explain how stupid that is, boss? It would be stupid even if you were healthy. Which you aren’t. You’re going to get yourself killed.”

  “Remember what I said to General Hake right before the Cleansing?”

  “Nope. I wasn’t there. I was busy lying in the infirmary trying not to die. But I’m going to bet it was something stupid.”

  “I told him the army wouldn’t be much worse off if we got killed, because our tactics weren’t working. Same applies now.”

  The tattooed captain had scowled. “Like I said, something stupid.”

  “Railes, I can’t come up with any better options. I’m going to get some rest, and then I’m going to go out when it’s dark enough to give me some cover but before I start tripping over tree roots because I can’t see.”

  He’d grabbed my shoulder, his face set in stubborn lines that reminded me of a particularly ill-tempered mule. “You don’t have the Darkness in you anymore. You can barely walk. You’re not going.”

  I’d smiled sadly. “I’m telling you, it’s the best chance we’ve got, and you know it. Now let go of your superior officer so I can get some rest, or I’ll court martial you.”

  “I’ll tell Prophetess.”

  “She’s not the military commander here, I am. And I really will court martial you if you tell her. Now go make sure everyone’s got torches ready for tonight. I’ll bet if Yoshana hits us, it’ll be in the dark.” Even with superior numbers, the Overlord would want to take advantage of the terror the Darkness would sow at night. She would be thinking in terms of morale too. She’d want to demonstrate that Prophetess’ immunity to the Darkness didn’t protect the rest of us.

  Railes hadn’t liked it, but he’d grumbled and left me on my cot. I smiled to myself in the dimness. He really did seem to care about me. Of course, it would be hard for him to find another commanding officer even uglier than he was.

  When the light inside the tent had faded to the dull shades of twilight, I dragged myself to my feet, picked up my sword, and staggered out. Railes hadn’t posted guards to stop me, which was good. I couldn’t have put up much resistance if they’d forced me back into bed. Part of me was disappointed.

  I had spent quite a bit of my time lying there considering my approach - both physical and emotional. The physical aspect was the more immediately troublesome. Roshel commanded Yoshana’s left flank, which fronted on our right. It would be easy enough to just walk out into the no man’s land between the lines. But the chances of getting shot were unpleasantly high. And if I carried a flag of truce, I might be taken to Yoshana rather than Roshel.

  I preferred a more oblique route that would take me around the back of the opposing forces. I had no illusions that there wouldn’t be sentries posted, but I liked my chances of bluffing my way past better.

  Unfortunately that meant hobbling out through the back of our own lines, trudging up a forested rise, and using the cover of those trees to make my way around. While hoping Roshel didn’t have sentries or Darkness wards posted in the woods.

  I considered asking Furat to lend me Sam, but rejected the idea. The dog had been through enough, and this was one risk too many. It was ridiculous to jeopardize a mission of such importance because I was worried about a dog… but like I’d told Railes, I had enough on my conscience. At least Seven had known what he was getting into.

  “Sir?”

  And of course I had my own sentries to worry about. It was good to see this one at least was paying attention. As Railes had said, Lago had prepared for a flanking maneuver. I was exiting our lines far enough from the enemy that the barricades were perfunctory obstacles, designed more to slow an enemy attack than to stop it… and thus leave us the ability to get out if we needed to make a run for it. They had plenty of torches, though. I approved.

  “Going to check out that forest. We don’t want anything sneaking up through it, do we? I may be a while.”

  “Should I get some men to go with you, sir?”

  “No. Thanks. Some things I can do better alone.”

  The soldier nodded. He wasn’t one of my Shadowed Hand troops or a ranger, which meant he was a Monolith regular. I thought about what Railes had said, that they weren’t totally sold on me. The captain had put it as a joke, but he was probably right. Prophetess was a hero to them, but I was a former enemy, dragged by her from the deepest darkness into the light. More or less into the light. My journey to the Sorrows and return with Seven and the Hidden Moon Clan wouldn’t have helped their opinion of me. And the Josephite religion of the Monolith didn’t have anything good to say about the Select, even when they hadn’t been infected with the Darkness.

  “What’s your name?” I asked.

  “Burha, sir.”

  “Right. Burha, if I’m not back in four hours, get a message to Prophetess. Tell her to talk to Captain Railes. He knows where I’m going.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  I stepped into the darkness behind our lines. Tall grass had been trampled flat in the camp. Here it brushed against my knees. It occurred to me that for all I was supposed to be the supreme commander of this army, and kept insisting I was supposed to be commanding it, I seemed to spend more time running off by myself. Which reinforced my suspicion
that I probably wasn’t a very good commander.

  The bright side was the troops wouldn’t miss me much if I got myself killed.

  “Judge Minos?” the sentry called softly from behind me.

  “Yes, Burha?”

  “Are… are we going to be all right? Against Yoshana?”

  “We’ve got God’s own prophet on our side. Of course we will.”

  The setting sun was in my eyes, casting a long shadow behind me as I plodded along up to the wooded ridge. The good news was that anyone watching me would be staring into it too, and then I’d have it at my back once I reached the trees and swung around.

  The woods weren’t as thick as the Sorrows, and of course they were free of the constant, brooding presence of the Darkness. Still, I felt like I was being watched, and sometimes a loud rustling would sound in the distance. Over the past couple of years I’d learned that chipmunks and squirrels could make an amazing amount of noise scurrying through dry leaves, and I murmured a quick mantra to steady my nerves.

  I moved slowly and kept my eyes and ears open. I was in no shape to go running through the trees, and I didn’t want to.

  The central hilltop where Seven and Yoshana had fought was an excellent vantage point, and I’d used it to pick the route I wanted. This long, low ridge extended southeast, past Roshel’s position. Further on it split into two wooded wings with a grassy valley between. Roshel’s troops were anchored on the nearer wing. I’d go into the valley, swing around the woods, and approach from open ground to the south, behind her lines, as if I were a messenger coming in from the southeast. I didn’t want to come at her men straight out of the trees - like trying to approach from the front, it seemed like a good way to get shot.

  The trick was staying oriented in the woods so I’d come out where I wanted.

  Something moved in the shadows in front of me, far larger than any squirrel. I staggered back and jerked my blade clear. A deer stared at me wide-eyed, not ten feet away. It froze for a long moment, then turned and bounded off.

  “Stupid animal,” I muttered as the pounding of my heart gradually slowed. A beast that would stray so close to so many armed men was going to wind up getting eaten.

  I wondered if I was any smarter than the deer.

  The forest thinned in front of me, and I crouched in the cover of a bush and scanned the vista ahead. It looked like I’d caught my first break of the past forty-eight hours. I was exactly where I wanted to be, and the way was clear. The valley, shadowed by the trees behind, sloped gently down. The way I was feeling, I liked going down much better than up. I descended the gradual slope, starting to feel like this might actually work. Gently waving prairie grass brushed my thighs. It was like wading through a shallow, green sea. I rehearsed my conversation with Roshel in my mind.

  They say you never hear the one that gets you. I definitely heard the crack of the gunshot, although I couldn’t have honestly said whether that was before or after pain exploded in my knee.

  Writhing where I collapsed on my back in the tall grass, I couldn’t see my attacker. The katana had flown from my hand. I wanted to turn over and crawl in search of it, but my knee screamed in protest when I tried to move. Maybe if I lay very still, the gunman wouldn’t be able to find me. It hardly seemed likely, but the fact was, I wasn’t going anywhere.

  I heard the rustling in the grass before I saw the figure silhouetted to the west. It moved with a strange, slow, shuffling gait, but it had a carbine and so it didn’t need to be fast. Anyway, it was faster than me.

  When it was twenty feet away I recognized Erev.

  “Forgot about me, didn’t you?”

  His voice sounded like he’d inhaled fire. Or like someone had severed his vocal cords with the Darkness and they hadn’t healed properly. His slow, painful walk was probably the result of me destroying the tendons in his ankles. Although evidently what I’d done to his wrists hadn’t ruined his marksmanship. Unless he’d been aiming higher.

  He was the only survivor of Yoshana’s merely human bodyguards who’d crossed the Sorrows with us. I’d left him crippled when I fled back to Our Lady. I hadn’t been sure it was a mercy not to finish him. Yoshana might easily have tortured him to death for letting me escape. It seemed instead she’d healed him. At least somewhat. Still, I could understand why he wasn’t pleased to see me. Even in the half light, I could see that pain had carved new and deeper lines into his weathered face.

  “Glad to see you made it out of the Sorrows alive,” I said, trying to force a light tone through gritted teeth.

  “Are you?” he croaked. “You always were stupid.”

  “I guess we’re pretty close to even now,” I grunted, “so I'll have to ask you not to come any closer. Or I’ll be forced to kill you.”

  He barked out a rasping, coughing laugh. “It’s not in you anymore, boy. Everyone knows that.”

  “Really? Same way everyone knew I had a Hellguard with me?”

  “Only one way to find out.” He took a shuffling step closer and leveled the carbine, sighting on my face. The bore of the muzzle looked much larger from that angle. I couldn’t help staring at his finger on the trigger.

  He laughed again and lowered the weapon, just a little. It was still pointing at me. “Didn’t think so. Woulda been funny, though, me going to all this trouble to hunt you down and then you doing for me instead. Woulda been an end, so that’s still good. But I like this end better.”

  I tried to sit, propping myself up on my elbows. The pain in my leg and the gun aimed at my belly convinced me otherwise and I fell back. I felt terribly vulnerable, which I suppose was the idea.

  “I can’t help but think killing me seems a little ungrateful.”

  “Why, because you let me live?” he rasped. “Live like this, half crippled? So I can stagger around behind Yoshana like some old dog that she can’t even be bothered to put down? You would think that was doing me a favor, you stupid blackeyed freak.”

  “You’d rather I’d opened your throat?” I snapped. Which wasn’t smart, but the pain and tension were getting to me.

  “If you’d had any guts or any brains you would have. If you really stood for anything instead of blowing along like a leaf in the wind you would have. Your Prophetess would have.”

  He completely failed to understand her if he thought that, but he was continuing his hissing rant. “That was always your problem. No determination, no spine. You’re too worried about hurting anyone’s feelings to do the right thing. You’re too nice.” He sneered the last word.

  “That’s kind of ironic. You’re the only person in the world who thinks so, and you want to kill me. So you’re doing the right thing here?”

  “I’m right the way the guy holding the gun is always right. Might makes right. By right or force. By right of force. Take your pick, the ancients had lots of ways of saying it. All of ’em true. You always wanted to do the decent thing. There’s no room for decent men in war.”

  “Some people would argue that’s exactly where you need decent men. Father Roric at Our Lady, for example, is very persuasive in his discussions of just war -”

  “And you talk too damn much,” Erev grated, raising the carbine.

  His body jerked, then again and again, as Cat’s shining knife plunged into his back over and over. He let out a sigh and the gun slid from his hands. He followed it to the ground and lay motionless in a widening pool of blood.

  “Actually, I’d say I talked just about the right amount.” I looked up at the paleo. “Took you long enough.”

  I’d managed a glimpse of her coming down the hill when I’d tried to sit. I hadn’t been sure I could stall until she reached me.

  “Railes above,” she said, jerking her chin over her shoulder. The slight girl wiped her blade on Erev’s pants and sheathed it, then reached down to help me stand. She was stronger than she looked, but couldn’t support all my weight. I gritted my teeth to stifle a scream when I put pressure on the wounded knee.

  My adjutant w
as coming down the slope, rifle in hand.

  “You couldn’t have just shot him?” I asked.

  He shrugged. “Wasn’t sure I’d get a clean kill without him squeezing off a round into you. You seemed to be keeping him busy. Friend of yours?”

  “Let’s say acquaintance. He was one of Yoshana’s personal guard. He never did like me very much.”

  Railes showed me the twisted grin that made his skull tattoo even more hideous. “Seems like there’s a lot of that going around, boss. You’re not the most popular guy.”

  I grimaced. “Well, he maybe had more reason than most, since I crippled him with the Darkness and left him helpless in Hellguard territory. Still, he was a jerk before I did that. Speaking of which, thanks for saving me. I don’t mean to complain.”

  “Second serious wound in two days can make anyone cranky, boss. Why don’t you sit down and let me look at that before you bleed out?”

  I was only too happy to sit again, or more accurately slump back to the ground. Railes used Cat’s knife to cut my pants away above the knee, and peered at the injury in the fading light.

  “Not that I mind, but what were the two of you doing out here?” I asked. Although it was pretty obvious.

  “Figured you might get yourself killed out here all by yourself. Cat’s the best tracker we’ve got, so we took off after you.”

  “I guess I’m lucky you two didn’t stop to fool around in the woods.”

  To my amazement, Cat blushed. Railes said, “That would be unprofessional, boss. We were going to do that on the way back.”

  The paleo unleashed a punch to his shoulder that would have broken a lesser man’s bones. The captain just grinned.

  “Best I can tell, the slug hit the top of your kneecap and bounced off. You’ve lost barely any blood, but it’s probably shattered the bone. Bet it hurts like a mother.”

  “Good guess.”

  “I’m not sure the two of us can carry you back. I’ll stay here and Cat can go for help.”