The Tiger Mom's Tale

by Lyn Liao Butler

  “What happened, Lexa?” Jake’s voice was so gentle it almost brought tears to her eyes. Instead of answering, she leaned over and kissed him, pressing her lips firmly to his, as if she could keep the answers inside only by stopping her mouth from talking.

  And when he kissed her back with as much passion, she longed to tell him that she was falling in love with him too, and that she was going to miss him so much when he flew home to San Francisco the next day. But she said nothing.

  34

  The next day, images from her night with Jake flitted through her mind as she trained Andi. She berated herself for acting like an idiot. He’d told her he was falling in love with her, and she hadn’t been able to answer. What was wrong with her that she couldn’t let go and tell him how she felt? Why did the thought of falling in love with Jake terrify her so much?

  “Okay. Stop moping and tell me what’s wrong.” Lexa was jolted back to the gym by Andi’s command. She focused her eyes on Andi, who had stopped doing standing rows with twelve-pound weights to stare at her.

  “You mean besides that my whole life has turned upside down?” Lexa tried for a flip tone, but it didn’t quite work.

  “Yeah. It’s Jake, isn’t it?”

  Lexa picked up her cell phone and stopped the stopwatch she was timing Andi with. “I don’t want to talk about it. Tell me about you. Anything new?”

  “I had a date last night. It did not go well.”

  “Another one?” Lexa arched her eyebrows, about to say something snide. But then she remembered her remorse at snapping at her clients lately and vowed to rein in her snark. “Let’s do a four-minute tabata round, and then you can tell me about it.”

  Andi frowned. “No tabata! Who invented this twenty-second-on, ten-second-off bullshit?”

  Lexa smiled but started the timer and gestured for Andi to start with mountain climbers. For all her complaining, Andi worked hard and was able to finish the round without too much effort. Lexa handed her a water bottle. “Okay, tell me about your date.”

  “The guy seemed great. He looked like his picture, said he wants to get married and have kids.” Andi sat on a bench to take a gulp of water. “We met for drinks on the Upper West Side. You won’t believe what he said to me.”

  “What?”

  “He took my hand and was like, ‘I think we have good chemistry. But before this goes any further, I have to ask you a question.’”

  Lexa smiled. “What, he wanted to know about your pot-smoking ex-boyfriends?”

  “No.” Andi scowled. “He asked, ‘Are you willing to convert to Judaism?’”

  “What?”

  “Exactly! All I could think was, ‘Huh?’”

  “What did you say?”

  “I stammered something incoherent.” Andi screwed the cap back on her water bottle. “He told me he wants to raise his children in the Jewish faith, and the mother has to be Jewish or willing to convert. Since he’s forty already, he didn’t want to waste time getting to know someone for months only to find out she won’t convert.”

  “But that’s great he knows what he wants. I think that’s smart.”

  “Then you date him.”

  “Maybe I will.” Lexa lifted her eyebrows at Andi. “What’s his profile name?”

  Andi looked incredulous. “Are you kidding me? No. You’re not going out with him. I have nothing against the Jewish religion. I’d totally convert if I were in love with the guy. But I don’t know him!”

  Lexa burst out in laughter at Andi’s reaction. “What did you say to him?”

  “I said no.” Andi stood up with her hands on her waist, her workout forgotten. “So he says, ‘Thank you for being so honest. I really had hopes for us. I think we would have made beautiful babies.’”

  “OMG.” Lexa collapsed to the ground, holding her sides.

  Andi wasn’t done. “Who says that?” She grabbed a mat and slammed it on the floor. “And then you know what he did? He left some money and walked out, leaving me sitting there with my mouth open. He dumped me on the first date!”

  “Oh, no. What did you do?”

  “I sat there like an idiot. I asked the waiter for the check, and you know what he said? He asked if the gentleman was in the restroom.”

  “And?”

  “I had to tell him the gentleman was not in the restroom. In fact, the gentleman had left the premises. And instead of just getting me the check like a nice waiter would do, he leaned down and whispered to me, ‘A lover’s spat? Don’t worry, the makeup sex is always the best.’ And then he winked at me. He. Winked. At. Me.” She said the last with so much derision Lexa couldn’t help laughing again.

  “I don’t even want to know what you said to him.”

  “I told him the truth. And he blinked and said, ‘Honey, I’ve never heard that one before!’ And he sashayed off to get my bill and to tell the rest of the staff about the poor dear seated outside who just got dumped because she wouldn’t convert.”

  “Andi, stop,” Lexa said between fits of laughter. “You’re killing me.”

  Andi finally got down on the mat and did a set of push-ups. “I’m about ready to give up on this online dating thing. It’s so much work, and I get more dick pics than I do actual nice guys who want to date a nice, semi-normal, successful woman.”

  “I’m surprised guys aren’t lining up to date you. You look great.”

  “I wish.” Andi grimaced. “I always feel like a side of meat on display when I’m out at bars, waiting for someone to look me over and decide if I’m worthy. Or else they recognize me from TV and only want to go out with me because they think I can help them with their acting careers. I cook. I don’t act.” Andi flipped over on the mat. “Enough about me. How are you?”

  “Okay. Taking it one day at a time.”

  She was about to elaborate when she looked up and saw Kiley walking toward them. Lexa was meeting with Kiley after Andi’s session, but she was ten minutes early. Kiley looked nervous, and Lexa noticed she wasn’t wearing her workout clothes. She was dressed in a sleeveless black sheath that hugged her body, with a pair of snakeskin high-heeled sandals. Her hair was down and blown out to float around her face. She threw her arms around Lexa. Lexa met Andi’s eyes over Kiley’s head, and Andi sat up on the mat.

  Lexa pulled away after a moment and saw tears in Kiley’s eyes.

  “What’s the matter?”

  Kiley released a breath and said, “I came to say good-bye. I’m leaving.”

  “Where’re you going?”

  “I decided I didn’t care if John has no money. I love him so much. He’s moving to San Francisco because a gallery there has agreed to show his work, and I’m going with him.” She suddenly seemed to notice Andi for the first time. “I’m sorry, Andi. I’m cutting into your time.” She hiccupped the last word.

  Andi stood and waved a hand. “It’s okay. We’re basically done. You look like you need Lexa more than me.”

  “You don’t even know me, and you’re so nice.” And at that, Kiley burst into tears. Elise, who was walking by at the moment, took in the scene and beckoned to Lexa to take Kiley into her office. Andi gave Lexa a hug and said, “I’ll catch you later.”

  “I’m sorry. I keep cutting your sessions short.” Lexa returned the hug.

  “Trust me, you gave me my money’s worth already.” Andi gave her a mock glare and then left Lexa alone in Elise’s office with Kiley.

  Lexa turned to Kiley, who was now sobbing into a tissue. “I’m proud of you. Money isn’t everything.”

  “I know,” Kiley wailed. “But I’m sad to be leaving New York. And giving up my dream of marrying a rich husband.” She turned terrified eyes at Lexa. “What if he can’t support us with his art? How are we going to have a family?”

  “Well, I’m sure you’ll find a job out there. Restaurants always need waitresses and barte
nders.” Kiley had been working in a restaurant around the corner from the gym.

  Kiley sniffed, and Lexa handed her tissues. After blowing her nose loudly, Kiley looked up. “I know. I’m not afraid of work. I was going to break up with him, but when I pictured my life without him, I just couldn’t bear it. I’d rather have him be in my life and not be rich than not have him in my life.”

  “That’s good, Kiley.” Lexa looked at her with new respect. If she’d had to bet, she would have thought Kiley would break up with John. If Kiley could stand up to her fears of being poor, then maybe Lexa could face her own fears and go back to Taiwan and confront Pin-Yen. And maybe she could allow herself to fall in love with Jake.

  Kiley’s eyes filled again. “I’m going to miss you. You’ve done so much for me this year. You’ve listened to me and helped me out so many times when I didn’t understand things.”

  Lexa nodded absently and handed Kiley more tissues, her mind on her own problems. Was she really thinking of accepting Pong’s conditions and going back and confronting Pin-Yen?

  Kiley dabbed her eyes. “We’re leaving in a few days. That’s why I can’t work out today. I have to pack. I’m going to find a trainer when I get to California, but I know I won’t find anyone like you who’ll listen to me the way you do.”

  Lexa patted Kiley’s back, still distracted by the thought of actually returning to Taiwan. And what about Jake? Could they possibly make things work, given how different their views on children were? “That’s good.”

  Kiley looked at her with curiosity. “Are you okay? You seem . . . out of sorts. Is something wrong?”

  Before she could answer, Elise’s office door opened, and a male voice said, “Hi, El. Ready to go to lunch?”

  Lexa looked up, and her eyes widened. Greg stood in the doorway. His mouth opened as he registered that Lexa was in Elise’s office with Kiley. They stared at each other, and no one spoke until Kiley asked, “Who’re you?”

  Lexa found her voice. “Kiley, this is my dad.” She turned to him. “What are you doing here? I can’t go to lunch. I have a client.” She glanced back at Kiley. “Or I did.” Then she turned to Greg again. “When have you ever called me ‘L’? And how did you know I was in Elise’s office?”

  He turned bright red and backed out of the office. “Sorry, I’ll catch you later.” He slammed the door shut.

  Lexa’s brows furrowed, and she looked at the closed door. What had all that been about?

  Kiley stood. “I’ve got to go. Can we stay in touch?”

  “Of course.” Lexa gave Kiley a smile, realizing she was going to miss her.

  They left Elise’s office, and Lexa walked Kiley to the front door of the gym, where she gave Lexa one last hug before saying good-bye.

  Now that she had an hour free, Lexa decided to work out by herself to take her mind off Jake. On the way back from the front door, Lexa glanced into the gym’s café. And there, sitting at a table together, were her dad and Elise. He raised a hand in greeting, and Elise gave Lexa a small smile, reaching up to touch the lotus necklace she was wearing around her neck.

  And just like that, it clicked. The last time Lexa had seen a necklace like that was on her dad’s coffee table in his apartment. She walked over to them.

  “You,” she said, gesturing between the two of them. They both looked guilty, like she’d caught them cheating on their diets with bacon cheeseburgers dripping with Russian dressing. “The two of you? Together?”

  And Greg nodded and gave a weak smile. “Surprise?”

  35

  I don’t know if I can walk any more.” Hsu-Ling stopped in the middle of the Sunday crowd outside the Metropolitan Museum of Art. She’d been in New York for five days, but since Lexa had had to work all day on Thursday and Friday to make up for canceling on her clients earlier in the week, she had dragged Hsu-Ling all over Manhattan that weekend. She wanted to fit in as many sights and attractions that Hsu-Ling wanted to see as possible.

  “I’m so sorry. I totally forgot about your leg.” Lexa reached out to take Hsu-Ling by the arm.

  “I’m glad you forgot. But I’m not used to all this walking. No wonder you’re in such good shape.”

  “That’s one of the perks of working out for a living. If I didn’t teach classes, I don’t think I would ever get to the gym. People always assume I work out for hours, but the truth is, I don’t.” Her text alert dinged, and she looked at the phone and smiled when she saw it was from Jake.

  “Jake again?” Hsu-Ling gave her a knowing look.

  “Yes.” He’d been texting her every day since he’d gone home on Thursday morning. She sent a reply and then gestured to the museum. “Do you want to go home and forget about this?”

  Hsu-Ling thought for a moment and then shook her head. “No. I’ve come all this way. I have to be able to say I at least set foot inside the Metropolitan Museum.”

  “There’s a rooftop bar and a few cafés inside. We could get something to eat and sit for a bit?”

  “If I sit now, I’ll probably never get up again.” Hsu-Ling grimaced as she shifted her weight to her left leg. “Why don’t we at least walk through the French exhibit you were talking about, then we can get something to eat? I want to see the roof garden commission too.”

  They headed toward the museum, and Lexa stepped off the curb to avoid a large group of tourists planted smack in the middle of the sidewalk. Hsu-Ling grabbed her arm and pulled her back next to her. “You step into the street like that in Taiwan and you’ll get run over.”

  Lexa turned to Hsu-Ling. “Sorry. I do that all the time. But I remember the traffic in Taiwan. It’s a hundred times worse than New York.”

  “You’ll have to be careful when you come over. You’re so used to New York City streets and crossing against the lights. You can’t do that in Taiwan.”

  Lexa didn’t answer, but they exchanged a meaningful glance. Hsu-Ling knew very well Lexa was torn about whether to go back to Taiwan. They walked to the museum entrance in silence and got in line. Once they were in the museum, they followed signs to the French exhibit.

  “Hey, so I’ve been wondering,” Hsu-Ling said as they walked. “Do you get Alexa jokes a lot? You know, like, ‘Alexa, what’s the weather?’ Or ‘Alexa, turn on the heat.’”

  Lexa scrunched up her face. “Yeah. I don’t know why Amazon had to name their virtual assistant Alexa. But that’s why I’m glad I go by Lexa.”

  “Can you imagine a virtual assistant named Hsu-Ling?” She snorted. “Non-Chinese people would have so much trouble pronouncing it. ‘H-Su-Ling,’ they’d probably say.” She exaggerated the “h” sound at the beginning of her name.

  Lexa smiled, and they stopped to look at a painting by Matisse. While Hsu-Ling studied the Impressionist scene of outdoor leisure, Lexa asked in a casual voice, “Have you talked to your mother?”

  Hsu-Ling didn’t turn from the painting, but her body tensed. “Yes.”

  “When?”

  “I called her on Wednesday night, the day we read Pong’s letter. After I got back to the hotel from dinner with you and Jake. It was Thursday morning in Taiwan, and I knew I’d catch her at home.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” Lexa looked at Hsu-Ling in confusion. They hadn’t talked about the will and Hsu-Ling’s mother in the past few days, and Lexa had been waiting for Hsu-Ling to bring up the subject.

  “I didn’t want to upset you further.” Hsu-Ling shuffled her good leg on the ground. “I was waiting for you to ask me.”

  “And I was waiting for you to bring up the subject.” Lexa poked Hsu-Ling in the arm, making her sister smile.

  “I’m so angry with her. You have no idea.” Hsu-Ling’s smile fell from her face.

  “All these years, I was afraid to have you find out what really happened, because I thought you would take her side.”

  Hsu-Ling let out a dry laugh.
“What? You really believe I’d side with my mother after finding out what she did to you? She kept us apart.”

  “I know. But she’s your mother. I’m very protective of my mother.”

  Hsu-Ling cocked her head to one side. “If your mother did to me what my mother did to you, would you protect her?”

  “No.”

  They looked at each other before Hsu-Ling turned away. Her hands opened and closed as she spoke. “I told her I knew everything. What she did to you. How Pong lied for her. Do you know what she did?”

  Lexa shook her head.

  “She laughed, like she was humoring a child. Said I had no idea what she’d sacrificed to make sure I got everything I deserved from Baba.” Hsu-Ling squeezed her hands together. “ChiChi, she wasn’t sorry at all. That’s what I’m most mad about. If she’d apologized, said she was wrong, maybe I could have forgiven her and asked you to forgive her. But she’s not sorry.”

  “I didn’t figure she would be sorry.”

  “Oh, it gets worse.” Hsu-Ling slanted a look at Lexa. “She told me not to believe everything you told me. Said you have psychological problems from having to grow up not knowing your father. That you were damaged in the head, not right, and jealous of me.”

  Lexa’s hand flew to her mouth. She was the one with psychological problems?

  “I shut her up. I told her about Pong’s letter. How he left you money and the apartment, and if you accepted it, the building would come back to Baba, and in turn, to you and me equally.” Before Lexa could open her mouth to ask about the legalities of that, Hsu-Ling jumped in. “I spoke to the lawyer too. He said he’d work out the issues. All you have to do is accept Pong’s gifts, and he’ll make sure we own the building.”

  “Your mother must have died when she heard that.”