The Tiger Mom's Tale

by Lyn Liao Butler

  49

  Why are we back here?” Maddie stood on the sidewalk staring at the red gate. She’d been busy texting with Mike and the kids in the taxi ride from the temple and had missed the conversation between Lexa and Hsu-Ling.

  “We’re picking up Ah-Ma to take her for coffee, before going furniture shopping. She doesn’t get out much these days. She loves the bread at this coffee shop we go to.” Hsu-Ling unlocked the gate, and they headed down the hallway toward the stairs leading up to the second floor, where Ah-Ma lived.

  The door to Pin-Yen’s apartment opened before they could round the corner up the stairs. Pin-Yen stood in the doorway with her purse in hand but stopped when she saw the three of them.

  “Mama. We’re taking Ah-Ma to coffee.” Hsu-Ling spoke in English.

  Pin-Yen didn’t say anything and turned around as if to go back into the apartment.

  “Mama,” Hsu-Ling said again, louder. She walked to her mother and put her prosthetic leg in the door before her mother could slam it shut. “You’re not talking to me now?”

  Pin-Yen held still.

  “Stop this.” Hsu-Ling pushed past her mother and went into the apartment. “You can’t stop talking to me just because Lexa is here. I’m still your daughter.”

  Lexa and Maddie glanced at each other, and then Maddie shrugged and went in after Hsu-Ling, with Lexa trailing behind.

  “As long as that girl is here and you continue to bring her around, we have nothing to say to each other.” Pin-Yen spoke in English and stood stiffly in the foyer with her arms crossed over her chest, glaring at the trio, who had made their way into the living room.

  “That girl is my sister,” Hsu-Ling said between gritted teeth. “She is welcome here whenever she wants, because she owns the building. She’s family.”

  “She’ll never be my family.”

  Maddie laughed. “Well thank goodness for that. I wouldn’t want you in my family.”

  Lexa turned and glared at Maddie. “Shut up,” she hissed.

  “No, I won’t shut up. I’ve had enough of her attitude.” Maddie walked up to Pin-Yen. “You’ve done nothing but make us feel unwelcome from the moment we met you. You put Lexa down and won’t admit what you did to her all those years ago was wrong. I think it’s time you shut up. Your husband acknowledged that Lexa was his daughter. And there’s nothing you can do about it.”

  “Get out of my house.” Pin-Yen stabbed a finger at Maddie, and Lexa could literally see the steam coming out of her ears.

  “No.” Maddie said the word deliberately and crossed her arms over her chest.

  “I said get out!” Pin-Yen screamed. She pointed to the door, and when no one moved, she walked over to Lexa and grabbed her arm. “You will never be Jing Tao’s daughter. Get out of my home.”

  Lexa tried to shake off Pin-Yen, but the older woman had a tight grip. “Get your hands off me.”

  Maddie cocked her head. “Lexa knows Kung Fu. I’d let go of her arm if I were you.”

  “Fook you.” Her face red with rage, Pin-Yen let go of Lexa’s arm and turned to Maddie. Lexa went back to Hsu-Ling’s side.

  “Fook? What the heck is that?” Maddie pretended to scratch her head and let out a laugh. “Oh, you mean ‘fuck.’ If you’re going to curse me out, at least pronounce it properly.”

  Pin-Yen’s face turned so red that Lexa almost wondered if she’d been drinking. The older woman stared at Maddie with loathing.

  “Maddie, stop,” Lexa said, hoping to shut Maddie up. Lexa could see the distress in Hsu-Ling’s eyes as she fixed on the duo standing in the foyer. But there was no stopping Maddie.

  “Just admit you lost. Lexa is back. She’s claiming her Taiwanese heritage, getting to know her family again. And what do you have? Nothing. Your husband died knowing the truth about you.” Maddie leaned in so close to Pin-Yen that the older woman shrank back. “He died knowing what a liar and bitch you are. So go ahead, stop talking to Hsu-Ling. She’s the only one still on your side, but if you want to alienate her . . .” Maddie threw up her hands and shrugged. “You’re going to die a lonely, bitter old woman because your precious daughter, who you did all this for, is going to end up hating you.”

  Time stopped. Hsu-Ling stood with a hand over her mouth while Lexa held still at her side. She was about to move, to say something, anything, to dispel the terrible tension in the air, when Pin-Yen suddenly sprang to life. Reaching for the big blue-and-white vase that had stood in the foyer for as long as Lexa could remember, Pin-Yen picked it up and swung it over her head.

  Lexa had time to marvel at how Pin-Yen was able to lift the heavy vase before reality crashed in and she realized with horror that Pin-Yen was aiming for Maddie’s head. Before Lexa could react, she heard a cry and, out of the corners of her eyes, saw Hsu-Ling leap forward.

  As if in slow motion, her eyes tracked Hsu-Ling’s form as she sprang between her mother and Maddie, pushing Maddie aside. Pin-Yen’s eyes widened as she realized her daughter was directly in line with the downward arc of the vase in her hand. But by then, it was too late. The vase crashed down hard over Hsu-Ling, who fell against Maddie, causing Maddie to stumble and sprawl to the floor. Hsu-Ling crumbled backward out of the apartment in a shower of broken glass, her head making a sickening crack as it connected with the concrete floor. Then the only sound was the harsh breathing coming from Pin-Yen as she stared down at the still form of her daughter, the broken vase still in her hand.

  50

  Someone was screaming. Over and over again, a loud, piercing scream that made Lexa want to put her hands over her ears. She stared at the still form of her sister. It reminded her of all the times Hsu-Ling used to trip when they were younger and Lexa had stared, horrified, at her sister sprawled out on the floor. Except this time there was blood, so much blood, seeping into the concrete floor. Lexa glanced at Maddie, also on the ground, but she was sitting up. Maddie looked dazed but seemed otherwise okay. Realizing the severity of Hsu-Ling’s situation, Lexa finally got her body to move, going to her sister’s side and grabbing her phone to call 911. But wait, was it 911 in Taiwan? Or something else? Oh, God, she didn’t know. Frantic, she jabbed at her phone as if the answer would magically appear.

  Footsteps pounded down the stairs, and suddenly Li-Chung, one of her cousins, appeared on the landing. She ran to Pin-Yen, who was screaming her head off, and slapped her hard. Pin-Yen collapsed to the ground and crawled to Hsu-Ling, and Li-Chung pulled out her phone and dialed for help. Her voice was calm as she asked for an ambulance and gave their address.

  Lexa dropped to the other side of Hsu-Ling, not sure if she should touch her but wanting to stop the blood. She could hear Maddie behind her saying something to her, asking questions, but her attention was on Hsu-Ling. Oh, God, please hurry. She needs help. Lexa knew CPR but not basic first aid, and she crouched helplessly over the still form of her sister.

  * * *

  • • •

  Lexa sat as far away from Pin-Yen as she could in the waiting room. They’d just taken Hsu-Ling into surgery to relieve the pressure on her brain. She called her mom.

  “Mom.” Lexa tried to keep the hysteria from her voice as she told her mom what happened.

  “It’s my fault. I should have been there with you and not sent Maddie. I’m so selfish!” Her mom’s voice rose with each word.

  “It’s not your fault, Mom.” Somehow, her mom’s panic calmed Lexa’s own hysteria.

  “I’ll get on the first plane. Poor Hsu-Ling. She saved Maddie’s life. Is Maddie with you?”

  “No, she’s still at the building with my cousin. I came in the ambulance with Hsu-Ling.”

  “I could kill her mother!”

  It took Lexa a few minutes to calm her mom. She only hung up after Lexa promised to call as soon as they had news. Lexa paced the waiting area, unable to sit still. She prayed, not sure who she was praying to; the gods, h
er father, anyone who would listen. Please don’t take my sister away when I’ve finally found her again. I just lost my father. I don’t want to lose her too.

  Without thinking, she pulled out her phone again. And it wasn’t until he answered that she realized she’d called him.

  “Lexa, what’s wrong?”

  She sank with relief into a hard plastic chair and closed her eyes as the sound of Jake’s voice washed over her. Her heart calmed as his comforting voice soothed the raw edges of her nerves.

  * * *

  • • •

  The doctor was speaking in Mandarin, and Lexa struggled to understand.

  Brain injury . . . first forty-eight hours . . . critical . . . bruising on the brain. And then a whole bunch of medical terms before more words seeped in. Lacerations . . . relieved the pressure . . . hole in skull.

  Pin-Yen nodded at whatever the doctor said, tears running down her face. Lexa looked back and forth between them, trying to gauge if the news was good or bad. She was about to speak when the doctor turned to her and spoke in English. Lexa let out her breath when he said they’d done what they could for now and it was up to Hsu-Ling to wake up.

  * * *

  • • •

  Something beeped, and Lexa looked up, her eyes anxiously scanning the monitor above Hsu-Ling’s hospital bed. The machines hooked up to Hsu-Ling were terrifying, and every noise made Lexa jump, sure that something was wrong and she should call for a nurse. But after two days of sitting by her sister’s side, she’d learned which beeps signaled an emergency and which were routine. She learned to look at the numbers and graphs that appeared on the display panels and trust that they were doing their job to inform the medical staff of Hsu-Ling’s condition. She dropped her gaze back on her sister, lying so still and pale, with large white bandages wrapped around her head.

  Lexa fidgeted in her chair, trying to get comfortable on the hard wooden surface. Her cell phone was clutched in one hand, since her Taiwanese family was constantly reaching out to see if there was any change. Her mom and Greg had been calling and texting from New York too. Hsu-Ling’s friend Kuan-Yu had stopped by many times, and even though it was supposed to be family only, the nurses had let him in to see Hsu-Ling briefly.

  Lexa was dying of thirst but didn’t want to get up. Too soon, Pin-Yen would be back, and Lexa wanted to stay by Hsu-Ling’s side as long as she could.

  Her phone dinged. It was from Jake.

  Any change in HL?

  No.

  I’m sorry. Wish I could be there with you.

  Her mouth curved, even as sadness weighed in her heart.

  Her phone dinged again, this time from Maddie.

  You need anything? Want me to come to the hospital and keep you company?

  Yes, come, if you can get Li-Chung to drive you over. Maybe bring me a bubble tea?

  Ok. Be there in half an hour.

  Maddie had wanted to be with Lexa at the hospital right after the accident. But in the chaos that ensued, Lexa had been glad that Li-Chung had taken over. She had calmed Maddie down, herding her upstairs so Lexa could ride with Hsu-Ling to the hospital. Her husband had driven Pin-Yen to the hospital on his scooter.

  Lexa leaned her arms on the side of the hospital bed and dropped her head on top. She was so tired and so scared. Pin-Yen had insisted on staying overnight with Hsu-Ling both nights, so Lexa had gone back to the hotel, but she hadn’t slept. She’d spent as much time in this room as she could, keeping watch over Hsu-Ling when Pin-Yen needed a break, and willing her to wake up. Hsu-Ling’s face was bruised and swollen, and she’d needed many stitches to close the cuts caused by the broken glass. But it was the blows to her head, one from the vase and one when her head hit the floor, that the doctor had been most concerned about. Her head had been shaved for the surgery. They’d hoped she’d wake on her own after the surgery, but she’d remained still and silent for two days.

  Hsu-Ling made a noise, a soft sigh, and Lexa picked up her head. The first time her sister had done that, Lexa had called the nurse, sure it meant Hsu-Ling was waking up. Now she knew it was an involuntary sound, and after scanning Hsu-Ling’s face for movement, Lexa sighed herself. She picked up one of her sister’s limp hands.

  “Hey there, sleepyhead. Wake up.” They’d told her it couldn’t hurt to talk to Hsu-Ling. “That’s what my dad used to say to Maddie and me when we were little.” Lexa smiled, thinking about Greg trying to wake them when they were young.

  Lexa used her other hand to adjust the blanket from where she’d pulled it loose when she’d leaned on it. “We still have so much to see and do, Hsu-Ling. You can’t just sleep my entire visit away. There’s only three and a half days left before I go back to New York. You promised to take me to the Yizhong Shopping Street. We were supposed to take Maddie to Sun Moon Lake today. You promised to take me to the original bubble teahouse in Taichung. What’s it called again?” Lexa took her hand back to scroll through her phone, where she’d bookmarked the website for the teahouse. “Oh, yeah. Chun Shui Tang. You said you loved their turnip cakes and cuttlefish balls. And the handmade noodles with the minced meat sauce.”

  Lexa stopped when her stomach growled. All this talk of food was making her hungry. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d eaten. Maybe she should have asked Maddie to bring food along with the bubble tea.

  She picked up Hsu-Ling’s hand again and continued her monologue. “I can’t lose you now, Hsu-Ling, not when we’ve finally found each other again. You’re my only real link to Baba. You said you’d teach me Taiwanese. Our cousins are nice, but it’s awkward when you’re not around. I need you. I need you to help me get to know our family, our history and culture.”

  Her phone dinged, and Lexa looked at the message.

  I got steamed buns for you. Thought they’d be easy to eat at the hospital. Li-Chung also picked up tian bu la for Hsu-Ling. Maybe if she smells her favorite food, it will wake her up?

  Lexa held up her phone. “Look, Maddie’s on her way. She’s bringing tian bu la for you. How does that sound?” Not really expecting an answer, Lexa let the phone drop to the side of the bed. “That was a brave and selfless thing you did. Maddie and I will never forget it.”

  Hsu-Ling’s mouth moved, and Lexa grabbed the cup of ice chips from the table beside the bed and ran some over Hsu-Ling’s lips.

  “Okay, I’ll make you a deal. If you wake up now, I’ll stay in Taiwan for a whole month. Longer if necessary, until you’re back on your feet. I’ll stay in my apartment. You’ll teach me Taiwanese, and we’ll eat so much my clients won’t recognize me when I go home. I want to spend lots of time with Ah-Ma, hear more stories about our family. I want to visit the temples and the graves of our ancestors. I want to know who I am, Hsu-Ling.” Lexa looked down when a large tear plopped on the sheet and watched as the cotton absorbed it immediately, leaving a round wet spot.

  A noise at the door made Lexa looked up. Pin-Yen hovered just inside the room, and Lexa stood as soon as she saw her. They’d worked out a silent agreement where if one wanted time with Hsu-Ling, the other would leave. They’d yet to say a word to each other since the incident.

  Pin-Yen looked awful. Her salt-and-pepper hair was hanging around her face in greasy strings, and her face had aged ten years in the past two days. Lines pulled at her mouth, drawing it down, and dark shadows darkened the skin beneath her eyes.

  They stared at each other for a moment, and then Lexa walked to the door, trying to pass Pin-Yen without touching her. She stopped when Pin-Yen laid a hand on her arm. Lexa stilled and looked at it.

  Pin-Yen cleared her throat. “Stay. Just for a minute.”

  Lexa raised her eyebrows, her face stony.

  “Please.”

  With reluctance, Lexa backed into the room, keeping her eyes on Pin-Yen. The older woman looked like she’d lost everything dear to her in the world,
which she almost had. She dropped her eyes to the floor, as if the sight of Lexa hurt her eyes.

  Impatience brewing inside her, Lexa spoke first. “What is it?”

  “I . . .” Pin-Yen’s mouth opened and closed, but no other words came out.

  “Fine. I’m leaving.”

  “You’re going to stay? For a month or more?” Pin-Yen’s voice was hoarse, as if she’d lost her voice and was just getting it back.

  Lexa’s chin came up, and she said in a steely voice, “Yes. Don’t even think of getting in my way. Whether you like it or not, I’m part of the Chang family. You can’t chase me away. I’m not that fourteen-year-old girl anymore.”

  “No, you’re not.” Pin-Yen lowered her gaze again, her eyes stopping to rest on her daughter.

  “I will stay for as long as it takes Hsu-Ling to wake up and get better. If it takes longer than a month, then so be it.”

  “Yes.” Pin-Yen’s head dipped once.

  “You can spread all the lies you want about me, but this time, I’m not going to run home crying. I missed out on getting to know my father because of you. You tried to keep Hsu-Ling and me apart, but our bond is stronger than your manipulations. I am a Chang, my father’s eldest daughter, and I’m back.”

  “Yes.”

  Lexa realized the other woman wasn’t fighting her. Pin-Yen had her head bowed, her hands clasped in front of her, as if praying for forgiveness. “Yes?”

  Pin-Yen raised her head and met Lexa’s gaze. “Yes. I’m sorry.” Her voice trembled with emotion, but she took a breath and continued. “I was wrong.”

  That was the last thing Lexa expected. What was she supposed to say to that? “It’s okay”? No, it wasn’t okay. Pin-Yen was responsible for keeping Lexa away from her father. And it wasn’t okay that Hsu-Ling now lay in the hospital because this crazy woman had tried to kill Lexa’s other sister, only to injure her daughter instead.