That Which is Unexpected
Page 30
Chapter 21: The Attack of the Merrywidows!
I heard a car honking. I looked out the window and saw Jason in the driveway, sitting in the driver’s seat of a white sports car, so I went out to meet him. He rolled the passenger window down as I approached.
“Birthday present from your mom?” I inquired.
“Yeah, kind of her way of saying ‘sorry we haven’t seen each other in two years.’ I would still be angry, but this car is so awesome that she is forgiven,” Jason replied.
“It is an awesome car, but couldn’t you have come up to the door?” I asked.
“No, that’s not really possible at the moment on account of my huge, throbbing, erection,” Jason said.
“You said that like a normal person would say ‘I can’t because my foot hurts.’” I told him.
“My foot does hurt… from the lack of blood going to it. Anyway, go get Rei. I’ll give you guys a ride,” Jason replied.
I ran into the house to fetch Cheza and my backpack. Since the Saturn Sky is a two-seater, Cheza sat on my lap.
‘It’s fine if it’s only for one day, right?’ I thought as Cheza adjusted in my lap so she could sit comfortably.
Jason started driving to school. About ten minutes into the drive, Jason squeaked like he was trying really hard not to laugh.
“What’s so funny?” I asked as Jason’s face turned red from lack of oxygen.
“What?” Jason questioned with his voice at a higher octave than normal. Jason looked over at me and started laughing his ass off.
“What’s so damn funny!?” I practically yelled. Cheza grabbed her ears and gave me a look that clearly said, “Cole, small car, voice loud.”
“Sorry,” I apologized to her.
“Oh, nothing,” Jason said as he looked back over at me, finally in control of his laughter.
I glared at him, but he didn’t budge. The car was silent for the next minute with the radio off.
“How come I’m always the one moving!?” Jason said in the higher pitched voice he uses when imitating Cheza.
Cheza reached over and punched him in the arm while calling him an ass. It took me a few minutes before I finally got it.
“Oh you dick! She’s my little sister!” I said while punching him in the arm.
“Aw same spot!” Jason said, switching hands and rubbing his arm with the hand that was previously on the steering wheel. He looked over at Cheza, who was sporting a disappointed little pout, and started laughing again.
‘I guess she’s disappointed that I didn’t punch him harder, but he is the one driving.’ I thought.