The Closer: A Marriage of Convenience Romantic Comedy

by Kristy Marie

  He leans down, whispering back, “No, I didn’t pay the monthly dues, so I haven’t been introduced yet.”

  He wouldn’t let me bring my wrench for this exact reason. First, he brings me to this uppity Lamaze class, and second, he makes me mingle with women who basically have diamonds the size of stars on their fingers.

  And now he’s being sarcastic.

  “Apart from what you might think, all rich people don’t know each other,” he says seriously, stopping in front of the bottled waters and handing me one.

  “Well, excuse me if I thought maybe you had some teammates here.” Isn’t that how he found the doctor’s office?

  “If I did, I—”

  “Lexington?” A guy several years older steps in front of Cooper, extending his hand for Cooper to shake. “I’m Caulder, I’m a client of your brother.”

  Cooper stands taller, like he can’t be as antisocial as he wanted. “It’s nice to meet you.”

  “Your brother brags about you every chance he gets.”

  I find it funny that Maverick looks so scary yet brags about his “little” brother’s accomplishments. The way they all are so close sends a pang through my chest. I used to think Griffin and I were close, but after seeing Coop and his family, I’m starting to think my definition of close was highly lacking.

  “When are you due?”

  I turn to a woman who thinks it’s okay to interrupt my eavesdropping on my husband and his conversation with… I forgot his name. “Christmas,” I state flatly, turning back to the refreshment table.

  “Oh. You should have the doctor induce or schedule a C-section a couple weeks before. I’d hate to miss Aspen that time of the year.”

  “Aspen? Like the place?” Surely we aren’t talking about Cooper’s agent here. I highly doubt she prefers to spend her Christmases with clients.

  The woman scoffs, fingering her platinum necklace. “Of course. We never miss a year.”

  How delightful. “I think we’ll manage.”

  She shrugs. “Just trying to warn you. With our first child, I was two weeks later than my due date. And after forty-eight hours of labor, I finally had our son—with my husband at the airport.”

  The tragedy she must have endured… Wait. “He left without you?”

  She looks around, probably scanning for her crappy husband. “I’m going to give you a little advice. When you marry professional athletes, remember it’s all about them and what they need.” She glances at Cooper, and my gaze follows, noting him engaged and actually smiling at that guy whose name I can’t recall. “They work six months straight; when it’s the off-season, you’re either there when they need you, or someone else will be.”

  My mouth falls open, and she flashes me a fake smile full of pity. “Get the C-section and go to Aspen. Otherwise, you won’t need to worry about baby number two.”

  Just when I thought Ear Hair was the shittiest male on the planet. Now, this lady is saying that the majority of players are assholes too? Is that what Cooper does or did? Will he fill his bed with someone else when I’m healing for six weeks?

  No, surely not. Cooper isn’t like that. Except, I really don’t have to worry about what happens after Christmas, now do I? Unlike that crabby lady, I have a contract, one that ends with delivery.

  I should give her advice to always get a contract—it ensures you won’t have a broken heart.

  “All right, mommies and daddies. Finish up and have a seat on the mat.”

  I watch as the unhelpful lady wiggles her fingers and scurries off, pulling her husband off the phone.

  “You ready for this?” Cooper’s voice is a welcome distraction.

  “No. I’m thinking we should get rich people diarrhea.” I wave my hand, looking up at the ceiling like it’s going to be written there. “Oh, what’s the word?”

  “Dysentery?” Cooper suggests like the amazing man that he is.

  “That’s it! Yes, we need to get dysentery and get out of here. Maybe we can have a quickie before Pops needs to be picked up.”

  Cooper turns me in his arms. “Did someone say something to you? You seem upset.”

  Do I? I thought I was nailing this whole ‘blending in’ thing. “Not really. Nothing I didn’t already know anyway.”

  That these are not my people—not that Cooper is a ho, though, I don’t really know that for sure. We’ve only been married for a short time.

  Cooper stares at me a beat longer before sighing and pulling me to a mat in the back. “Come on, if you hate it, we can get diarrhea and go home.”

  I look at the man who has literally changed my life and take his hand, allowing him to pull me to one of the yoga mats.

  Cooper Lexington is a good man and an even better husband. I don’t know if he has the professional athlete mentality like ol’ girl suggested, but I know he’ll kill himself in order to take care of the people he loves.

  “Oh, wow.” Cooper stops abruptly at the edge of the mats, and I have to move around him to see what caused him to stop.

  “Well, this has certainly taken a turn,” I note, noticing all the wives getting on all fours. “You sure this is a Lamaze class? I mean, surely they aren’t about to turn off the lights and just start fuck—”

  Cooper turns and covers my mouth with his hand. “Just thinking of you on all fours is giving me a semi.”

  My gaze drops between us, and I note the bulge in his pants.

  “This isn’t funny,” he says when I can’t contain my grin.

  ” Mr. and Mrs. Lexington, is there something wrong?”

  I look at the tense lines in my husband’s face, the bulge in his pants showing no signs of disappearing. Now’s my chance to get out of this nightmare. “Tell her we have the rich people’s diarrhea, Coop, and I promise, I’ll get on all fours at home.”

  He groans, no doubt warring with his morals of making me learn stupid tips or plowing me from behind. “We can’t just walk out.”

  “Are you sure?” I ask. “Because I don’t have any underwear on, and if I get on all fours, you’ll be staring at my slit through these thin leggings and not be able to do anything about it for two hours.”

  Cooper’s hands grip my arms as he leans over me.

  “Mr. and Mrs. Lexington, is everything okay? Please come join the class on the floor.”

  I cup Cooper one more time, squeezing what was a semi that is now a full-blown stiffy. “What’s it going to be, Mr. Lexington? Torture or pleasure?”

  He needs no more enticing as he flips me around, ushering us to the door, his voice loud when he yells, “I’m sorry. We have dysentery!”

  Cooper

  “I’m going to crack the quartz.”

  I turn from the stove, where I’m currently basting the turkey for tonight’s Thanksgiving meal, to my wife who I have perched on the island, merely serving as the phone holder and my own personal eye candy. “You’re fine.”

  “I’m as big as the entire island. It’s no longer cute for me to sit up here like I’m only a hundred pounds.”

  Drying my hands, I walk over to the most beautiful woman in the world, wedging my body between her legs. “I disagree.”

  Lifting her (technically my) shirt, I press a kiss to her belly, the little one inside now up to four pounds per our last ultrasound. The doctor said the baby is formed to perfection. The only thing we are waiting on is for the lungs to finish maturing and the baby to put on weight. Delivery cannot come fast enough. I can’t wait to hold the little one in my arms. The hiccups, the kicks, every little thing this kid does is nothing short of amazing.

  “You’re biased.” McKinley laughs.

  “That I am.” It’s ridiculous how hard I’ve fallen for this woman.

  “You two better not be contaminating the food!” Pops hollers from the living room. “I don’t want to have to change out of my pajamas.”

  He mutters something else about not wanting to eat at the Chinese buffet like we did last year when Ainsley smoked up the kitchen by burni
ng the pumpkin pie.

  “Hush, old man. Be grateful you’re even being fed at this point with all the snoring you did last night.” Between Mac getting up ten times to pee and Pops snoring like a steam engine, I might have pulled in four hours of sleep, which is rare anymore since McKinley has been helping out and baseball season is over.

  “Cooper, I will still wash your mouth out with soap for lying. You aren’t too big.”

  I chuckle, turning to my wife and meeting her grin. “Give me a kiss so I can get back to the food and shut him up.”

  She leans down, grasping my face between her hands while she presses her lips against mine. “You say the sweetest things sometimes.”

  She’s being sarcastic which is nothing new.

  “You know I love you.”

  Her lips purse. “Uh, huh.”

  I’m not disappointed she doesn’t say she loves me back. Honestly, McKinley has been through a lot this year, and I want her to heal. I know she loves me, even if she isn’t ready to admit it to herself.

  With one last peck, I turn back to the stove and continue basting what I hope is a decent-tasting turkey when my phone rings.

  “It’s Aspen,” McKinley notes, holding it out.

  “Just put it on speaker.” I need to get this turkey back in before Pops decides to risk it and not wait until it’s cooked all the way through.

  “Cooper?”

  “Hey, Aspen,” I say over my shoulder. “What’s up?” I don’t ask why she’s calling me on Thanksgiving. My agent sleeps about as much as I do.

  “Okay, so do you want the good news or the greatest news?”

  I can literally feel her excitement coming through.

  “Uh, surprise me.” I’m more focused on opening the oven and not dropping this turkey on the floor.

  “Ugh! You’re just as bad as your brother about showing emotion. Come on, Coop! This is big! Pick one!”

  The turkey slides to one side and I barely have time to catch it. “Asp? Can I call you back in a minute?” If I ruin dinner, I will never hear the end of it.

  “Are you fucking serious right now?”

  She doesn’t give me time to answer, which is probably for the best since I would have said, “Yes, I’m absolutely serious.”

  “Never mind. You know what? No, you can’t call me back. If you don’t hear our exciting news, I will get my ass on a plane and come over there and shove my shoe so far up your as—”

  “The good news,” I blurt out, shutting the oven door.

  “That’s better,” she says after a beat. “So, you know how I said you had interests sniffing around your free agency?”

  I glance at Mac on the counter, her face expressionless. “Yeah.”

  “Well, my dear, you had several offers. Eight to be exact!”

  The squeal at the end of Aspen’s sentence makes me grin. We’ve talked about a trade before, but with Ainsley due any day now and having a family of my own, I told Aspen I was interested in coming home. “I’m assuming that you’re happy with a couple of offers then?”

  “Oh, I’m more than happy with a couple. I’m freaking ecstatic. How does forty-mil a year sound?”

  I stop mid-sip. “Forty million a year? For a closing pitcher?”

  Closing pitchers make decent money if they are good, but forty million a year is considered prime. You’re at the top of your game for this kind of money.

  “Yes!” Her scream that follows sounds as if she’s bouncing up and down.

  “For how many years?”

  “Ah! That’s the better news. It’s a five-year contract!”

  A five-year contract? “That’s almost unheard of!”

  “Right? But there was a bidding war. Your skills are needed by many teams, my friend. Those teams need a pitcher to come in and save their pitiful run leads. They need a closer, and the best one on the market right now is you.”

  Her words take a minute to sink in. This deal is everything I’ve ever wanted in life. “Wait, what team had the winning offer?”

  “Eek! I thought you’d never ask. That’s the greatest news! It’s here!”

  My stomach clenches. “Here? As in Atlanta?”

  “Yes.” I can hear the annoyance in her response. Aspen is excited about this deal, and I’m giving her nothing. “Here in Atlanta. You know, where your home and family are,” she whines. “Cooper, why aren’t you telling me how amazing I am and how you want to give me a bonus?”

  Because my wife is sliding off the island, her face tight. “Mac, wait.” She waves me off.

  “I’m gonna check on Pops while you finish your call.”

  She’s upset, understandably. I haven’t talked to her about it, but really, I haven’t thought much about it. Aspen and I broached the topic after the awful intervention. At the time, I shot down everything she suggested, but a new contract during free agency? That was happening whether I had help with Pops or not. There was no harm in being open to all offers and locations.

  “How long do we have to respond to the offer?”

  A very much offended scoff sounds in my ear. “Are you serious?”

  I rake a hand through my hair. “I need to talk to Mac. With the baby coming and—”

  “Mac will love it in Atlanta. Besides, we’ll be here to help you and her with the baby. Not to mention Maverick and Ainsley miss Pops. Don’t be greedy, Cooper. Share the old man and the baby. You can’t keep them all to yourself. It’s not fair to your family.”

  Her comment hits me right in the heart. I know keeping Pops away from my brother and sister-in-law isn’t ideal. I know they miss him and Pops misses them too. Aspen is right, I have been selfish. All I’ve cared about is keeping Pops safe, keeping my partner in crime with me so that I’m not alone. I didn’t consider that my brother would want to recoup lost time with Pops while he was in college. But he’s never said anything.

  “He didn’t want you to be alone. He wanted you to be happy, and if living with Pops was the answer, then he’d never tell you otherwise. Maverick has Ainsley, and you had no one other than Pops.”

  I didn’t realize I had wondered that last part aloud as Aspen answers me, sending a sickening feeling through me.

  “Maverick will always be your big brother. He’s always gonna look out for your best interests, Coop.” She pauses for a second and then delivers the final blow. “Maybe it’s time you return the favor and look after him some.”

  Fuck.

  I want to scream. I want to throw this baster against the wall and put a dent in the sheetrock. It’ll make me feel better. Anything to forget that I’ve been selfish with the only family Maverick has left too.

  “We have a week to give them an answer.”

  Bile rises, and I know today is going to be awful. “When would I have to report to Atlanta?”

  “The first of February. But, Coop?”

  I inhale, bracing myself for another blow. “You should come earlier to let McKinley pick out a house and spend the holidays with your family. You know, get things settled.”

  I know this. I do. But things aren’t as simple as Aspen thinks. “Okay. I’ll let you know my answer by the end of the week.”

  She doesn’t respond immediately, and I think that’s because she’s disappointed I didn’t accept on the spot. It’s a great offer. Six months ago before I married Mac, it would have solved all my problems. But now… not so much. “All right. But don’t make me fly over there and kick your ass. Don’t be stupid. This is a once in a lifetime deal.”

  I know. “Did you tell Maverick?”

  I don’t know why I care if she told my brother. Well, I guess I do. The last thing I want to do is choose between him and Mac.

  Aspen sighs thick and heavy. “Maverick doesn’t know yet. I’ll only tell him if you make the wrong decision.”

  Aww. How sweet of my agent to cross lines of professionalism if I choose incorrectly. “I’ll get back to you.” Inhaling, I look to the ceiling. How the fuck am I supposed to deal with this? “
And, Asp?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Happy Thanksgiving.”

  She sounds resigned and not nearly as happy as she was when she first called. “Happy Thanksgiving, Coop.”

  After agreeing to pass along Aspen’s love to Pops, I head into the living room, only to find Pops watching TV alone. “Where’s Mac?”

  “In the bedroom. She said she was tired.”

  More like pissed, but it’s about time Mac and I have this discussion. We might have agreed to end things at delivery, but things have changed.

  “Mac?” I rap on the door once and open it, finding Mac in the bed, curled up on her side.

  “Not now, Coop. I don’t feel well.”

  Do I know she’s lying? Sure. But I don’t want this conversation to end in a fight.

  “Alright, but we need to talk about this. I’m a professional ballplayer. Sometimes I have to go where the contracts are.”

  That comment has her turning over. “I haven’t forgotten.”

  “Then talk to me. Clearly, our relationship is different now.”

  “Is it?”

  I rear back. “What is that supposed to mean?”

  McKinley sighs, pulling the blankets onto her. “I don’t know, I—”

  My phone rings in my hand, and I almost don’t answer it, but it’s Maverick, and Ainsley was due a week ago. “I gotta get this.”

  McKinley nods, rolling back over like the interruption was a welcome relief.

  “Mav?”

  My brother’s breathing is frantic like he’s running or having an SVT spell. “Mav? Everything okay?”

  “Something’s wrong with the baby.”

  Cooper

  I’m throwing clothes in a bag while Pops secures us airline tickets home to Georgia.

  “Cooper?”

  I shove another pair of pants in my suitcase, never looking up. “Are you packed?” I don’t have time to finish the contract discussion with McKinley. My brother needs me.

  “Um, no.”

  I pause, finally looking up and noticing McKinley’s red-ringed eyes. “Why not?”

  McKinley swallows, picking up a shirt off the bed and folding it. “I think you and Pops need to go without me this time.”