This Isn't Goodbye

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This Isn't Goodbye Page 7

by K. R. Reese


  “I don’t think she’s here, Mace!” I yell behind him.

  He rushes back down the stairs. “Where the hell could she have gone? Her car’s out front.”

  I shrug and look around. Nothing is out of place. “Dylan has his parents’ car. Maybe they went on that date they were supposed to?” I don’t think that was the right thing to say because Mason’s face turns red, fuming. “Mace, we can call her. See where she’s at.”

  I pull my phone out and dial her number. Cheyenne picks up on the third ring.

  “I thought you were at the gym?” Her voice is happy, normal. Like there’s nothing wrong.

  “We were at the gym, but, uh, something’s come up.” I sigh. “Where are you, Chey? I’m afraid your brother is going to have an aneurysm soon.”

  “Why? What’s wrong with Mason?”

  I ignore her question and ask again. “Where are you?”

  The balcony doors slide open and I turn toward them. Cheyenne and Dylan stroll through. The line goes dead.

  “We were out back in the yard. Mason, what’s wrong?”

  I look between them only to notice that Mason’s glare is firmly on Dylan. He must notice because he shifts uncomfortably.

  I step between them and stare at Mason. “Not here, Mace. Not now. Go outside. We’ll be out in a few minutes.”

  He does as I say, and I turn back to Cheyenne, questions blazing in her eyes.

  “What’s going on, Cole? Why is Mason pissed off? At Dylan, no less.”

  I run my hand along my jaw and glance at Dylan. He shakes his head at me, and I oblige. I focus back on Cheyenne. “There’s just something we need to talk about. I promise, I’ll tell you afterward. Can you stay in the house for me, please? Don’t listen in. Don’t look out the window. I’ll be back in a bit.”

  She huffs and stomps her foot like a two-year-old. I smirk slightly. “Fine, but one of you better explain soon. I’m tired of this bullshit.”

  Dylan and I watch as Cheyenne stomps up to her room. I’m intent on letting Mason have his say, but I can’t bite my tongue either.

  “Mason’s pissed, man. I don’t know what you do at these parties you keep attending, but he doesn’t like it. He doesn’t like that you’re around Cheyenne, much less that you’re talking about dating her.” I close my eyes and rub my hand over my head. “Let’s get this over with. I don’t want to have to pull you guys off each other.”

  I go to walk outside, but Dylan doesn’t follow. He’s staring intently at me. I stop and face him again. “Whatever it is, say it.” I wait him out.

  “Those parties…” He stops. “I’m sure he told you I haven’t been to one in a while now. I got invited when school started, I wanted to hang out with some people and meet friends. Since Cheyenne and I have gotten closer, I haven’t gone. I haven’t talked to anyone but you guys, and the guys on the team.”

  “This isn’t my fight, Dylan. Unless Mason discloses something that does piss me off, we’re cool.”

  Dylan visibly flinches, but I let it go. I’ll find out soon enough.

  When I step out the doors, Mason is pacing in front of the porch. The porch shifts with my weight and his eyes snap to where I’m standing, Dylan closely behind. The moment he steps outside and the doors close, Mason’s trying to storm past me to get to him, but I shove him back.

  “Mace, we’re not picking fights. We aren’t throwing punches. We can talk this out. Whatever this is.” I try to get him to tell me what’s really going on, but his eyes are firmly planted on Dylan. I snap my fingers in his face to get his attention. “Talk it out. Fighting isn’t going to help. Cheyenne’s upstairs, probably being a peeping Tom, and she’ll kill us all if fists are thrown.”

  That seems to slow him down and he steps back, hands up in surrender. I take that as a good sign and gesture for Dylan to step around me.

  “Mason, those parties were a way for me to meet friends. Nothing more, nothing less. I haven’t gone, as you know, and I don’t plan on it.”

  I watch Mason’s nostrils flare and he cuts his eyes to me before looking back at Dylan. He points his finger at him, eyes raging. “You know, I looked the other way at every party. Sure, you’re their friend, but I didn’t think it was more than that. Now, you’re thinking of dating my sister and I have a problem. What you did, what you’ve done. You won’t get within ten fuckin’ feet of her.”

  Dylan tenses and steps forward. I push him back and shake my head. “What I did at those parties hasn’t happened. It isn’t a habit I carry around with me.”

  Mason steps forward and waves me off when I try to stop him. They are standing toe to toe now, and I’m prepared to jump between them if I’m needed.

  “Can you promise me that, Dylan? Can you prove to me you quit doing all the shit you were the first few weeks you were here?”

  I grind my teeth and clench my fists. They’re talking in riddles and I’m still left in the dark about what Dylan’s done. I clear my throat and they both look at me.

  “Sorry to interrupt, but does someone want to clue me in on what the fuck is going on? I didn’t know anything about this shit until about an hour ago, and now you’re talking in fucking riddles and I’m clueless.”

  Mason smirks and looks back to Dylan. “Yeah, Dylan, want to clue him in, or should I? Because you think I’m pissed off? You haven’t seen anything yet.”

  Dylan visibly gulps in a lungful of air and my body coils tight. Whatever he’s about to say, I know I’m not going to like it. I expect him to back down, look away. Instead, he steps to me and takes a deep breath again.

  “When I first moved here, I would go to parties, get drunk and hang out.” He stops, but Mason nudges his back. “I, uh, also participated in some extracurricular activities that would have me removed from the football team if they’d drug test me and my Army career would be over before it started.”

  I raise a brow at him but give him a chance to explain. Dylan runs a hand through his hair and sighs. “Cheyenne doesn’t know any of this, and if she did, I know she wouldn’t want anything to do with me. But I haven’t gone, I’m clean. I can pass a drug test with flying colors. I…”

  I cut him off. I turn to Mason. “We’ve all made mistakes, Mace, and you can’t fly off the handle about it because he wanted to have a little fun. Hell, I’ve done drugs. It’s been a long ass time; but I’ve done it. If that’s what has you so worked up, you shouldn’t be.”

  Mason still looks tense, prepped for a fight. “That’s not what I’m worked up about. Dylan isn’t going to tell you the rest because he’s afraid you’ll smash his face in. But I’ll tell you because I want to see it happen. About a month or so ago, he slept with Kenzie. Pretty sure it happened more than once because they were quite familiar with each other.”

  There’s a long, silent pause. No one speaks. Then I start to laugh. My stomach tightens and I hunch over at the waist. Mason doesn’t think it’s funny.

  “Dude, why are you laughing? I just told you Dylan slept with your girlfriend and you find it funny?”

  I take my time to catch my breath and stand straight again. “Kenzie and I haven’t been together since the summer. She talked shit on Cheyenne, and I put her in her place; she didn’t like it. As for my best friend sleeping with my ex. Nah, that shit doesn’t bother me. He hadn’t met her as my girlfriend, so how was he supposed to know that’s who it was?”

  Before Mason has a chance to reply, a low whisper comes from the doorway. “Y-you… Dylan slept with Kenzie?” All our heads swivel in her direction and there are tears in her eyes. She stares at Dylan, probably trying to process what she just heard.

  “Chey,” I step forward. She shakes her head and runs back in the house, the tears falling free.

  “Fuck,” Dylan huffs out. “She’s going to hate me now.”

  “We live in a small town, man, she was going to find out. Nothing stays hidden here.” Mason’s voice is calm, collected. Like he knew Cheyenne was listening in. I narrow my eyes on him and he
smiles wide. Ding, ding, ding. My speculation is right; he knew she was standing in the door. He wanted her to hear Dylan admit it. Though, she probably heard what I said instead. Either way, it doesn’t look good for him.

  “I should probably go talk to her.” Dylan starts for the door, but I stop him with a hand to his shoulder.

  “Trust me, the last person she’s going to want to see is you. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but that’s the way it is right now. I’ll go talk to her, let her know it was before you asked her on a date and everything. She’ll come around. I’ll text you later.”

  Dylan nods and goes around the side of the house to leave. I turn on Mason as soon as he’s out of sight.

  “You knew Cheyenne was going to listen. You knew she was standing in the doorway. I think she had a right to know just as much as you, but that wasn’t the way to go about it, Mace. Did you even stop to think about what it would do to her? How learning what she just did would hurt her?”

  When he stares at me wide-eyed and doesn’t speak, I’d wager his answer is no, he hadn’t thought about how it would make Cheyenne feel.

  “I’ll go talk to her, but you’re going to have a lot of apologizing to do. Not only to Cheyenne, but also Dylan. I can understand why you were pissed. I’m a little ticked off, too, especially since it’s hurt your sister. But there’s different ways to handle this and you did not handle it well.”

  Mason turns back to face the yard and ignores me. I leave it at that and head toward Cheyenne’s bedroom. Today hasn’t turned out like I thought it would after this morning. I thought last night was bad, but I think things just got a lot worse. I only hope their friendship, relationship, whatever they’re calling it now. I hope it can survive it.

  It’s been a little over a week since Mason confronted Dylan in our backyard. It’s been just as long since I’ve spoken to him or been around him, too. I know Cole’s still hanging out with him; I’ve seen them around school a few times, mainly between classes and before football practice.

  But I’m avoiding them both. I don’t know what to say to Dylan. We weren’t dating at the time, but it still doesn’t feel right that he slept with Cole’s ex-girlfriend while he was talking to me. Though, if I’m honest, we weren’t anything more than friends and I’m being a hypocrite. Cole and I slept together in that time frame and didn’t say a word to anyone. We’ve gone on pretending nothing happened, as it should be.

  That’s also why I’m avoiding both my best friends’. I can’t look at Dylan without thinking about him sleeping with Kenzie. And I can’t look at Cole without being reminded that we did cross the line of friendship and I’m being unfair.

  If I avoid them both, they’ll think I’m still getting over it. I’ve already forgiven Dylan since there wasn’t really anything to forgive. As for Cole, I’m not sure what my real problem is. Maybe the fact that he kept enlisting from me? Maybe because he came to my room after their revelations out back and tried to comfort me, and all I wanted him to do was pull me closer again. Whatever the reason, it’s been a lonely couple of days that I’ve spent wandering aimlessly around school, keeping quiet, and spending a ton of time in my room.

  Mason hasn’t talked to me either. I think he feels guilty for exposing what Dylan had been doing, though it was in the past, and now he’s caused a rift between us all. Oh, well. If he hadn’t stood up for me, I would’ve been left in the dark about a lot of things. My best friends would’ve kept everything from me, and I would’ve been blissfully ignorant to what had been going on around me.

  The last class of the day is government and Cole happens to be in the class. Of course, he’s in most of my classes since our schedules were aligned perfectly, but Dylan’s also in those classes so neither of them have approached me.

  I’m mindlessly doodling in my notebook when textbooks are slammed down on the table beside me and I jump, eyes darting up to whoever is standing at the back of my chair. I find Cole glaring down at me, fire in his eyes, before he takes the seat next to me. I glance around the room, but it seems no one else has noticed the tension at the back of the room.

  “I’m done allowing you to continue avoiding me. I did nothing wrong. Dylan did nothing wrong. We’re still your best friends and there’s nothing left to say about it.”

  I know he’s right. I know that. But it still isn’t that easy, and something holds me back from agreeing with him.

  “I’m glad you see it that way, Cole, but I don’t. I’m mad at him, at you both. I don’t know anymore. I just need some space.”

  I go to stand and find a new seat, a new table partner, when Cole snags my wrist and plants my ass back in the seat. “I’ve given you over a week of space. I haven’t bothered you; I haven’t even attempted to talk to you. It’s enough. What’s really going on, Chey?”

  I nibble on my bottom lip and squint out the windows along the far side of the room. I won’t lie to him, even if my mind is screaming at me to. I don’t want to seem jealous.

  “Everything’s wrong. Dylan slept with your ex-girlfriend, which is still a huge concept to wrap my head around. I know it was before we started talking about dating, but it doesn’t hurt any less. You both know how I feel about her.”

  Cole stares at me a moment, gauging if I’m being honest. He’s not going to find anything but the truth in my eyes. “So, this whole fight, argument and silence is because you’re jealous he slept with Kenzie? Or that he slept with someone in general?”

  Now, I look down and fiddle with the pencil on the table. If I tell Cole that truth, he’s going to call me a hypocrite. He wouldn’t be wrong, but I don’t need him to tell me that. I’ve already thought about it plenty. When I continue to stare at the table and won’t meet his eyes, he smacks his hand down and I jump again. I lift my head this time to glare at him.

  “Will you stop doing that?” I hiss. Others in the class are noticing and I duck lower in my seat.

  “Not until you answer me.”

  I sigh and close my eyes. “I guess I would’ve felt this way regardless of who he had slept with. But the fact it was Kenzie makes it worse somehow.” Cole goes to talk, but I hold my hand up to stop him. “And, yes, I know I’m being unfair. I know what we, uh…what happened is the same thing. I’ve thought about that. More than I should, really.”

  Cole leans closer, we’re inches apart. I can feel his breath on my face. “No more silent treatment, Chey. It’s killing me. I think it really is killing Dylan. He feels like shit. But he hasn’t wanted to approach you in case it made things worse.”

  I shrug and turn away from him. “At first, it would have made it worse. I was mad at you both. I was mad at Mason. He hasn’t talked to me either, but I was fine with that. I’ve been fine.”

  Cole leans back, shocked if I had to guess. “You were fine? Are you serious right now? Because I can’t tell anymore.”

  I bite my bottom lip and pick up my pencil again. “I didn’t like it. I’m not saying that. But I was okay.” My voice is small, a whisper. Cole knows I’m lying, but he isn’t calling me out on it. “There wasn’t anything to forgive you guys for, not really. I just needed time to think, to process it all. I guess I should talk to Dylan now, huh?”

  “That would be a good start. Your problem isn’t with Mason. It isn’t even with me. Dylan knows you were mad, upset, whatever. He wants to apologize, to explain more.”

  I shake my head as the teacher steps into the room. “Dylan doesn’t have anything to apologize for. Which I’ll tell him when I see him next.”

  Cole laughs and smiles. “Oh, no. He’s expected to grovel, Chey, it’s mandatory. Mainly because he’s my best friend, too, and I want to see him sweat.”

  I laugh and smack his arm. “That’s rude. Very unfriend-like.”

  “Oh, it’s totally friend-like. I’m an asshole.”

  We fall silent as class begins. There isn’t any tension between us, no misjudging what the other is thinking. It’s like we’ve always been. Though I can’t get t
he thoughts out of my head that Cole and Dylan will both be gone in a few months, I know I need to support them. They’re following their dreams, doing what they’ve always wanted. Someone has to be there for them through it all. What better person than me?

  Besides, I still want to go on that date with Dylan. I’ll let him grovel, let Cole have his fun for a little bit. But then, I want to see what happens. As much as I began to think Cole and I would be together, things change, and I don’t want to ruin our friendship. He means too much to me to risk it. Dylan’s my best friend, too, but there’s always been something else between us. From the moment he stepped into the yard on that first day to introduce himself.

  It’s hard to believe that eight months ago, we started our senior year. Now, we have one month left. It’s surreal, something I didn’t think would ever get here. As I wait for Dylan to come outside, I wonder what he wants to talk about, what he wants to show me.

  I don’t have to wait long. He jumps in the passenger side of my truck and starts a GPS on his phone. Without a word, I blindly follow the directions.

  After an hour on the road, I glance at Dylan and see he’s fidgeting. I turn the volume down and tap my fingers on the steering wheel.

  “You haven’t said a word since you climbed in. You didn’t tell me where we’re going either. How much longer will I be driving? Because at this rate, you’ll have to drive back.”

  Dylan finally looks up from his phone, a frown on his face. “Oh, uh, sorry. I want you to check out this cabin with me. A family friend of my parents moved to Florida, retirement, and they offered it to me cheap. I don’t have my inheritance from my grandparents, yet, but Mom said they could front me half the money if I found a co-buyer.” He shrugs, like what he just spouted was no big deal. But before I can say anything else, he surprises me again. “I thought, since we’re both enlisted, that maybe you would want to go in on it with me. It can be a place for us to relax, hang out. Whatever we want.”

 

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