Paid In Full

by Rachel Rawlings

  “Jax.” One word. Just my name, but it held so much more. He’d managed all the things he wanted to say with just that one word.

  Dane was sitting on the floor, next to the bed, his back pressed up against the nightstand. I didn’t know how long he’d been there or how long I’d been out. Forgetting the water, I reached for him, relief that he was there flooding my body. He’d come back, waited, watched over me even though he’d hated every second of it and sworn he wouldn’t. When he said my name again, pressed my fingertips to his lips, the tears fell once more, harder, faster. I couldn’t look at him, couldn’t see all those things unsaid reflecting back at me in his eyes. So I stared at the ceiling like it held all the answers to the universe while he kept my hand pressed to his mouth and whispered words of comfort.

  Chapter Eight

  “Jax, I…” Dane grappled with what to say, all the while holding on to my hand like it was his lifeline. “You were crying, screaming. I wanted to wake you, started to more than once, but what if it made it worse? What if trying to help you only hurt you more?”

  “Water.” My fingertips brushed the side of the glass. There was more to say, but it could wait until after I took a drink and soothed my throat.

  “So instead of helping you, stopping whatever was happening to you, I just sat here and did nothing.” He put the cup in my good hand, helped me raise it to my mouth. When I shook my head to signal I’d had enough, he set it back on the nightstand. “I swore I wouldn’t. I was so pissed at you, at everything. I went to Mt. Royal with the sole purpose of drowning my anger in alcohol. I was well on my way to doing just that when I saw Tobias sitting at the opposite end of the bar. He didn’t have to say anything, just shook his head.”

  “You’re here. For now, that’s enough.” I tried to sit up, thought better of it when the room started to spin and tilt at the same time.

  “Slow down, take it easy.” Dane readjusted the pillows behind my head, tending to me like he was afraid I would break. It was both endearing and annoying. Probably more annoying, given he’d walked out at the start.

  There was nothing restful about the sleep I’d had. If you could even call it sleep. Resisting Apollyon while he was lurking in my dreams, in my head, was exhausting. Mentally and physically. But I couldn’t lie around in bed like an invalid.

  Something crashed in the living room.

  Dane was out of the bedroom before I could throw the covers off. Dragging a hand along the wall for support, I stumbled my way through the hallway and into the living room. I needed coffee to deal with whatever had crash-landed in front of my couch. Copious amounts of coffee. Preferably with whiskey in it.

  “Well, I’ll be a son of a bitch.” Dane folded his arms over his chest, nodding to the mysterious lump on the floor.

  “That’s putting it mildly. I had some other choice names for you earlier.” Turning back to the coffee pot, I concentrated on scooping the grounds into the filter and pouring the water. Pressing the start button, I waited for the magic to happen.

  “Ha, ha. You’re hilarious.”

  Something moaned while Dane shuffled around behind me.

  “Who’s joking?” I had no intention of letting Dane off the hook that easily. He’d be dodging metaphorical jabs for days. “Stop poking it.” Mostly awake and too curious to avoid the intruder any longer, I grabbed my extra-large black coffee and padded barefoot into the living room.

  Full view of the alien or in this case demonic invasion came just as I passed the couch. There was no mistaking the monster making a mess of the area rug – he’d haunted me for the better part of five years.

  Lazarus.

  “They actually kept their word.” Squatting down, I got a better look at the beaten mass of demonic flesh before me. Lazarus had not come willingly.

  “It would be a nice change of pace if the Romani kept his.” Dane pushed the demon onto its side, forcing another tortured moan from the beast. “We can’t take him out like this. I doubt he’ll be able to mask himself after the beating they gave him before they dropped him off.”

  “We’re lucky he’s here at all. Apollyon didn’t glean anything of use inside my head. Nothing worth handing him over for, anyway.”

  No, he’d only stirred the something inside me, awoken the evil lurking in the darkest parts of me and brought her to the surface. Which had been the whole point. It was easy to kill his demons, but mine? The one living inside me? The Devil had brought the fight on two fronts, a masterful tactic and one he was all too confident I’d lose against.

  “Jax? Hey, Jax.” Dane snapped his fingers once, twice. “You okay?”

  Blinking, I struggled to bring my focus back to the problem at hand. The demon in my living room. Nodding, I silently lied, knowing full well Dane wasn’t convinced by my effort to reassure him.

  “Maybe you should…”

  “No, I’m fine.” Waving off his worries and mine, I got up and took a seat on the chair opposite Lazarus.

  After a long sip of my coffee, I sank back into the cushions and forced myself to enjoy the moment. The demon who’d tormented me for so long had been gift-wrapped and drop-shipped to my apartment. Never look a gift horse in the mouth. Especially when said horse is the Devil.

  “So how do you propose we get him out of here?” Uncertainty that I really was fine written all over his face, Dane eyed me warily as he contemplated the conundrum of how to haul the scaly, oozing lump out across town without being seen.

  “We roll him up in the area rug and carry him out.” Crossing my legs, I took another swig of my coffee and stared at the carpet. Ruined. The stench of brimstone and the soot stains would never come out. Might as well make use of it.

  “And then what? Tie him to the roof? That’s a bit cliché, and just a little suspicious, don’t you think?”

  “It’s Baltimore. Trust me, stranger things have happened. I’m going to change, then we’ll take him to Maloney. See if you can get that piece of shit to lie down. Missionary style.” Chuckling at my own bad pun, I headed back to the bedroom to scrounge up something to wear.

  Preferably something that didn’t reek of alcohol and Apollyon.

  * * * * *

  At some point, the zipcar we’d taken from Mt. Vernon had been replaced with our Chevy Trax. Given that Dane and I hadn’t really had time to deal with the retrieval of our vehicle, I assumed we had Tobias to thank for it.

  The ride back to Maloney’s was loud but uneventful. True to form, Lazarus screamed obscenities and banged what I can only assume was his head, since he was bound and encased in an Oriental rug, on the roof of the car. Thankfully it was still early, the sun barely cresting the horizon. Baltimore’s citizens were either just getting up or just going to bed, and the people who should have been paying attention to the writhing monster strapped to the top of our car were tied up with the fires, pocket riots and looting.

  The unrest Apollyon’s minions had stirred in the city made our job as demon hunters easier. An unexpected side-effect Apollyon was no doubt trying to undo.

  “So how are we going to do this? We can’t just hand Lazarus over. Maloney’s already proven himself to be a liar and a cheat. We can’t expect him to keep his word and give us information on the spear. If he even knows anything at all.” Dane pulled up alongside the curb in front of Maloney’s house. Unclicking his seatbelt, he turned in his seat to face me, wincing as the banging and screaming increased now the vehicle had stopped. “Good cop, bad cop?”

  “Something like that.”

  Dane might have been joking, if the glint in his eyes was any indication, but I’d devised a plan not too far from what he’d suggested. I just hadn’t bothered to let Dane in on it. It needed the element of surprise. Tugging my jacket down as I got out of the car, I made sure the Smith and Wesson M&P9 tucked into my waistband was secure and undetectable.

  Dane got out of the car and started to undo the ratcheting tie-down straps we’d used to secure our bundle to the roof, while I went and rang the d
oorbell. The Romani took his sweet time answering. I had to leave my post on the porch and help Dane drag the demon up the walk to the steps or risk Lazarus escaping.

  With a boot and most of my bodyweight on what was most likely his neck – the thick roll of carpet made discerning body parts difficult – I helped keep Lazarus pinned to the ground while we waited for His Royal Highness to walk down the front steps and join us.

  “That’s him? That’s Lazarus?” Maloney clasped his hands in delight. He stumbled back a step, his demeanor quickly changing, when he realized a gun was pointed directly at his face.

  “Jesus, Jax. What the fuck?” Dane didn’t move, but his concern was a palpable thing. I hadn’t included him in my plan, and the uncertainty obviously worried him.

  “I ought to kill you where you stand, you lying sack of shit. Did you actually think Beelzebub wouldn’t rat you out at the first opportunity? You don’t deal with the Devil or his demons. Trust me on that.”

  “Wait, wait,” Maloney pleaded, his palms out, gesturing for me to stop. “If you kill me you’ll never know what happened to the spear.”

  “Jax. Take it easy. We need to hear what he has to say.” Dane played the good cop to a T. If I’d let him in on my plans, his performance wouldn’t have been half as authentic.

  “I’m listening.” I cocked the 9mm for emphasis. Wouldn’t want the Romani to think I was bluffing.

  “The spear…it doesn’t exist.” Eyes flicking from me to the gun, Maloney cleared his throat.

  “Then you’re of no use to me.” With my left hand cupping the grip for stability, I aimed the gun. I wasn’t an expert marksman by any means, but I’d had more practice of late, given the number of demons crossing over.

  “Jax.” Dane forced my name through clenched teeth. “What the fuck are you doing?” He moved to stop me, reaching for my arm, but Lazarus shifted and Dane’s attention was drawn back to keeping the demon from getting loose.

  “It doesn’t exist. I swear it. Not like you think.”

  The Elioud stirred, clawing her way up from the bowels of my subconscious. Why shouldn’t we kill him? What are you waiting for? Pull the trigger. He’s just another useless human. He betrayed you. He deserves it.

  Shut up, shut up, shut up! Hearing voices wasn’t anything new. I just wasn’t used to it being one of my own. Next item on my to-do list after dealing with Maloney – figure out how to put the monster Apollyon had woken inside me back to sleep. I took a deep, calming breath, then slowly exhaled and counted to ten. Unaware of my inner turmoil, Maloney took the exhalation as a sign I was about to shoot.

  “Listen, I’m trying to tell you! Would you talk to her? What the fuck’s the matter with you, man? You’re just sitting there. You’re going to just let her shoot me?” He was asking Dane for help, but his eyes never wavered from the gun. “They melted it down. It’s not a spear anymore. It’s a dagger.”

  “A dagger? You’re going to have to do better than that if you want my help, gypsy.” Dane shifted his weight but made no move to intervene.

  Angered by the derogatory remark, Maloney risked shifting his attention from me and my friends Smith and Wesson for the first time, spitting at Dane and narrowly missing his face. Without flinching, Dane brushed the saliva from his neck.

  “You think it’s easy concealing a Roman spear, Sin Eater? They melted it down and forged a dagger. A nail pulled from the true cross by Saint Helena herself is embedded in the hilt.”

  With a little whistle and a flick of my wrist, I brought Maloney’s attention back to me and the 9mm. “And the dagger is where, exactly?”

  “Byzantium.” It was my turn to be on the receiving end of Maloney’s DNA. Romani curses and expletives followed the projectile spit. Some of his confidence returned when I dropped to one knee, but the gun still aimed in his direction kept him in place. “I knew you weren’t going to shoot me. Stupid bitch.”

  “Byzantium… Byzantium.” Dane puzzled that over for a moment before recalling some of his geography. “That’s Constantinople.”

  “It’s actually Istanbul now, old timer.” Winking at Dane, I laid my left hand on the demon still bundled in carpet on the sidewalk. “What are the odds it’s even still there? Or that he’s even telling the truth?”

  The Elioud stirred again. He’s a liar. Shoot him. Concentrating on the words to banish Lazarus and silencing the Elioud at the same time was a struggle. Sensing something was wrong, Dane joined in, filling in the words when I stumbled.

  “What are you doing? We had a deal!” Realizing what we were doing, Maloney rushed forward in an attempt to stop us.

  I fired one shot at the sidewalk. Tiny shards of cement and a small cloud of dust erupted at Maloney’s feet. Screaming, he dropped to the ground and grabbed his foot. Whispering thanks that his house stood alone on the street and we were in Baltimore, I closed my eyes and focused on chanting. No sirens or flashing lights would interrupt us, so I let the rhythm of the words drown out Maloney’s cries and the whispers from my darker self. After a few moments, and without any fanfare, the lump inside the area rug disappeared.

  So did the seeping wound on my palm.

  Lazarus was back where he belonged, for the time being at least . And I’d upheld my end of the bargain, albeit not in the way Maloney had hoped. Blood covered Maloney’s hand, making it impossible to tell if his palm had healed or what he’d told us was true.

  “I think you shot off his big toe. You know, I read somewhere that you can’t keep your balance without your big toe. Weird, right?” Dane walked over to the Romani writhing on the ground and pressed a boot to his shoulder, forcing Maloney to lie back. “Let her take a look at it.”

  “Are you fucking crazy? Keep her the fuck away from me.” Maloney crab-walked backwards toward his porch.

  “Show me your hands.” Voice calm and with steady hands, I raised the gun again when Maloney failed to comply. “Show me your fucking hands and we’ll go.”

  Dragging himself up onto the bottom step, Maloney raised both hands. Like mine, the cut in his palm had begun to heal. With no other way to confirm what he’d told us, I took it as a sign that Maloney had told us the truth.

  One step closer and still half a world away from finding the spear. Or dagger or whatever.

  “Let’s get out of here.” Satisfied at having beaten Maloney at his own game and the bonus of banishing Lazarus, I headed back toward the car.

  “He marked you.” Maloney’s laughter followed me down the walkway.

  Turning around when I reached the car, I gave him one last look.

  “Yeah, well he’s coming for you, Maloney. Don’t bother running.”

  The Romani’s face crumpled, the fear in his eyes confirmation that he knew what I meant. Never make a pact with the Devil.

  Chapter Nine

  “I can’t believe you shot off his big toe.” Slapping the top slice of bread on his sandwich, Dane mumbled around a mouth full of roast beef. “What got into you today?”

  “I wasn’t trying to shoot him in the foot. I was aiming for a spot on the sidewalk in front of him.” Wanting to avoid another conversation about my deteriorating appetite, I picked at the sandwich he’d made for me. “Besides, he won’t need the toe. Not where he’s going.”

  “Hell’s not bad enough for you? The guy’s gotta walk funny too? You’re a cruel, cruel woman, Jax.” Dane’s eyes sparkled with humor over the rim of his glass of iced tea.

  “You’d be wise to keep that in mind.” Plucking a chunk of crust off my sandwich, I worked it into a little ball and flicked it at Dane.

  “How long do you think Lazarus will be gone this time?” Dodging left, Dane avoided the little ball of bread hurtling toward him.

  “If I never saw him again it would be too soon.” I started to push my plate away, then saw the look on Dane’s face. I pulled it toward me again and took a begrudgingly large bite of the sandwich.

  “Yeah, well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I’d be willing to bet
we’ll see him sooner rather than later.” After putting his plate in the sink, he grabbed a water bottle from the fridge. “Want one?” When I shook my head, he shut the fridge and headed for the couch. “So, you going to tell me what’s going on with you or what?”

  “There’s nothing going on with me. I’m fine.” Afraid he’d sense the lie, I chose to keep some distance between us and stayed in the kitchen.

  “You’re not fine. There was a moment when I thought you really were going to kill Maloney. A heads-up would have been nice. We’re a team, remember?”

  “Are we?” Spinning around on my stool, I leaned back against the kitchen counter and stared at him from across the room. “It didn’t feel like it last night when you walked out on me.”

  Old insecurities and past hurts had flared up when he’d walked out of our apartment, slamming the door behind him, but my anger over being left alone had more to do with my history than Apollyon. A history which I had Apollyon to thank for. I was so screwed.

  You can’t rely on the Sin Eater. You can’t trust him. The Sin Eater will hurt you, betray you just like everyone else. Even your angels are using you. You’re just a tool. A means to an end for all of them. For all of them apart from one. He waits for you. All you have to do is accept him.

  The hurt I felt was one more chink in my armor, allowing the Elioud to take a deeper hold of my psyche. She was becoming something more, something stronger. Struggling to contain her, I buried her beneath the emotions and memories she’d stirred up to weaken me and fortified my mental blocks. I needed to work on tuning her out. Tuning him out.

  “I deserved that.”

  I flinched when Dane’s thumb brushed across my brow in an effort to smooth away the crease that had formed there. He’d crossed the room without my noticing, and the touch was unexpected.

  “I shouldn’t have left, shouldn’t have let my anger and frustration keep me from being where I needed to be. Where you needed me to be. It won’t happen again, I promise.”