Diary Three: Dawn, Sunny, Maggie, Amalia, and Ducky

by Ann M. Martin

VERY WEIRD!

  Finally, Maura shouted, “It’s a wrap,” and the shoot was over.

  Maura thanked us and said it had been a great day. My friends seemed happy. Tyler said good-bye to everybody, told me he’d call me, and left with Felicia.

  UNTITLED

  I sang while you danced with her.

  It was unreal.

  What’s the deal?

  You pretend to be in love with her.

  Is it an act?

  Or fact?

  Why did I write such a stupid poem?

  I’m not in love with Tyler.

  Tyler’s just a friend.

  I think.

  I thought.

  I don’t know.

  My friends were all happy about being extras in a movie. They didn’t even mention how boring it was. Ducky thanked me about a zillion times. Well, at least some people had fun.

  Did Tyler?

  Sunday 5/9

  1:00 P.M.

  Tyler called!

  He said he loved listening to me sing yesterday. That it was fun to work together. He didn’t mention that his “work” was holding Felicia in his arms and slow dancing.

  It’s going to be a crazy, busy week for him. They’re filming the J.B.-saves-Vivian-from-the-undertow scene at some beach south of L.A.

  “But I have Saturday off,” he said. “Maybe we could double-date with Brendan and Amalia?”

  A date? Well, he probably just means we’d go out with Brendan and Amalia. Hanging out with them will be a more normal way to see Tyler than on a film set. At least Felicia won’t be there.

  I told Tyler I’d check with Amalia and Brendan and get back to him.

  Monday 5/10

  1:00P.M.

  I’m in study hall and should be studying, and will study in a minute, but first I have to write what’s on my mind.

  Why is everyone flipping out about a little scene in a movie? The Vista Voice wants to interview me about the film. And someone from the student government asked if I could arrange a special screening of Love Conquers All as a fund-raiser for our library.

  Do they think the movie is about Vista? Do they think Vanish are the stars of the movie? Just because we shot for a day doesn’t mean our little scene will even be in the final film. It probably won’t be. Movie producers spend millions of dollars shooting scenes that they never use.

  Ducky acts like he had a big part in Love Conquers All. He’ll be lucky if the back of his head is on the screen for a nanosecond.

  This week I’m going to study hard, work at the shelter, and forget anything that has to do with movies.

  Back to work!

  Back to my real life!

  Amalia and Brendan said okay to going out with Tyler and me Saturday night. Maybe we’ll go bowling.

  Will try not to think about Tyler until I see him on Saturday.

  Wednesday 5/12

  10:00 P.M.

  It feels good to be back to my old routine. Lots of homework. Aced a math quiz with 100+. Going to work at the shelter after school tomorrow.

  For the record: Dad said my singing on the set was “very good” and that Vanish has a “good sound.” He also reminded me that a classical background in music is important and he wondered if I was practicing piano enough. He managed to turn a positive thing (that he liked my singing and the band) into a negative (that I wasn’t practicing piano enough).

  I hate it when he does that.

  Later

  Talked with Tyler briefly. He’s going to pick me up at seven on Saturday. We’ll meet Brendan and Amalia at Alley Cat Bowling. Tyler said they finished shooting the rescue scene.

  How many takes did they film of Tyler saving Felicia?

  How many times did he give her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?

  Friday 5/14

  8:30 P.M.

  Phone message from Tyler.

  Hi, Maggie. Sorry I missed you. I’m really looking forward to tomorrow night. My tutor is giving me a big history test tomorrow morning. Studying tonight. The shoot is going okay. Wondered how you’re doing.

  I heard Uncle Fred yelling something to Tyler in the background. Tyler signed off with a quick Gotta go.

  Saturday 5/15

  Sometime After Midnight

  I should have known the evening would be a disaster. What was I doing hanging out with Tyler in the first place? I must have temporarily lost my mind.

  Tyler picked me up at seven as planned. He talked about the shoot all the way to Alley Cat. He was pretty hyper from working all week.

  When we reached the bowling alley, I reminded him to put on his sunglasses and hat. As soon as we walked inside, a guy Tyler knew called to him. His name was Rod Simon, and I figured he was a friend of Tyler’s who happened to be there.

  I waved to Amalia and Brendan, who were already at our lane. I was about to tell Tyler they were there, when two girls interrupted him. They giggled a lot and asked for autographs. A couple of guys saw what was going on and wanted to talk to Tyler too.

  I told Rod that it was nice meeting him and to tell Tyler I was going to our lane.

  “Nice meeting you too, Maggie,” Rod said. “See you over there.”

  I was a little surprised that Rod was planning to hang out with us, and I wondered if Tyler had invited him.

  Amalia, Brendan, and I bowled a few practice sets until Tyler and Rod joined us.

  Rod introduced himself to Amalia and Brendan. “Rod Simon,” he said. “I’m following Tyler around for a few days. We’re doing a lead piece on him for Teen ’Zine.”

  I was shocked. Tyler agreed to let a reporter join us!

  I glared at him. But Amalia invited Rod to bowl with us. Brendan thought that was a great idea too. No one but me seemed upset that we were hanging out with a reporter.

  But I was upset enough for all of us.

  Actually I’m still furious. Tyler must have suggested the evening because it would make good magazine copy.

  Is that how he treats a date?

  Is that how he treats a friend?

  If it is, I don’t want to be friends with him anymore. Especially since all he’s interested in is being a superstar surrounded by adoring girls. He must have signed autographs for every girl at the alley. And even when he was bowling he’d look around and smile. He turned bowling into a performance and our evening into a publicity stunt. He’s worse than Felicia.

  I don’t believe a word he said about missing his hometown and friends. I don’t believe a word he says about liking to be with me. No wonder his friends in Santa Claus freak out about his being a star. He acts like one.

  It was like Tyler wasn’t with us.

  Maybe he was wishing he was with Felicia.

  Later, in the car, Brendan was telling us a story about his cousin who does bungee jumping. It was really interesting. Brendan asked Tyler if he’d ever done it and Tyler said, “Done what?”

  He wasn’t even listening!

  Amalia made a joke out of it. And Brendan didn’t act offended. But I was.

  I should have trusted my instincts. I should have steered clear of Tyler.

  From now on I will.

  Monday 5/17

  After Homework, Before Bed

  Tyler left me an e-mail today. How did he get my e-mail address?

  Maggie, I’m sorry about Saturday night. I was surprised that Rod showed up at the bowling alley, but I didn’t want to be rude to him. He was just doing his job. But I know you didn’t like having him there. I thought you might come to the set today. Or maybe you’ll come later this week. Hope your week’s going okay. Call me or e-mail back. Please. T.K.

  I’m not e-mailing T.K.

  Or calling him.

  Or going on the set.

  Tuesday 5/18

  9:00 P.M.

  My rat brother gave Tyler my e-mail address! Zeke said he and Tyler have been e-mailing since the party.

  Amalia says that Tyler really seemed to like being with us and that she could tell he liked me and wanted me
to like him.

  I said every girl in America is in love with him and shouldn’t that be enough?

  She said that he’s not in love with every girl in America.

  I said that was only because he’s in love with himself, like every other actor.

  She said I’m not being fair.

  I said I had to go, that dinner was ready. Which was less rude than hanging up on her, which is what I felt like doing.

  Wednesday, 5/19

  8:00 P.M.

  Talked a lot about Tyler in therapy today. I tried to imagine what it must be like for Tyler suddenly to find himself in that shallow, fake movie world. Everyone treats him like he’s something special. I wonder if deep down he’s thinking, I’m just like everybody else. What’s so special about me? Why is everyone giving me all this money and all this attention?

  Dr. Fuentes said that is often the way famous people feel.

  I asked her if she thought I should give Tyler another chance.

  She said I should do what I feel like doing.

  8:09 P.M.

  I feel like giving him another chance.

  Later

  Amalia said I should have a party and invite Tyler. She thinks he and I should be together without fans, reporters, directors, other stars, or any of the Hollywood hype. She says that’ll give us a chance to figure out how we feel about each other.

  So I’m having a party. A normal Saturday night party.

  I’m going to go to the studio tomorrow to invite Tyler in person.

  Maybe he won’t come.

  Maybe he’ll be too busy.

  Maybe he’ll say he’s too busy so he won’t have to come.

  Friday 5/21

  As I was going up the steps to Tyler’s trailer he came out. “Oh,” he said with a surprised look. “Hi.”

  “Hi,” I said back.

  “I’ve been hoping that you’d show up.”

  We faced each other in the trailer doorway. I tried to look casual by leaning against the door jamb as I told him that I’d had a busy week.

  He said that he wondered if maybe I was mad at him.

  I admitted that I’d been a little ticked off about Rod Simon.

  He apologized again for that. Then he said he was glad I was being honest with him. That he’s sick of people saying one thing and meaning something else. “Which is the way Hollywood works most of the time,” he added. He sounded much older than fifteen when he said that.

  I told him about the party. He said it sounded great, and that although they were shooting tomorrow, he’d come right from the shoot.

  When I asked him how the shoot was going, he said he was on his way to do another scene with Felicia.

  “Which scene are you shooting?” I asked.

  “The one in the library.” He handed me his script and I quickly read over the scene. It takes place behind a stack of books.

  Here’s the dialogue (as well as I can remember it). A very romantic scene.

  VIVIAN: No one wants us to be together. My parents, your friends, my friends. Nobody’s on our side.

  J.B.: Maybe you should stop worrying about this stuff. Let’s just be together and see how we feel. This is about us. Not about them.

  VIVIAN: But—

  J.B. (putting a finger to her lips): Shhh. I’m happier when I’m with you than I am with anybody else, Vivian. That’s the truth.

  VIVIAN: I feel the same way.

  Felicia caught up with us as we were walking to the set. She said hi to me, but all of her attention was on Tyler. “Don’t forget that tonight after the shoot you’re coming to my place for dinner,” she reminded him.

  “I know. And don’t forget you promised we’ll work on tomorrow’s scene,” he said pointedly.

  I wonder if Tyler said that so I wouldn’t think they were having some kind of big date.

  “You staying for awhile?” Felicia asked me.

  I told her no and said good-bye to both of them. I didn’t feel like seeing Tyler and Felicia in luv with each other, even if it was acting.

  Tyler looked disappointed that I was leaving.

  I guess that counts for something.

  10:00 P.M.

  Dad brought home selected dailies of the shoot with Vanish.

  “I’m showing you the three best takes,” he told me. “But we’ll only be using a minute of that scene in the final movie—at the most. I hope you warned your friends.”

  The takes Vance and the editor selected are close-ups of Vivian and J.B. You barely see the band in the background. The camera is focused on the luv chemistry between Tyler and Felicia. All I could think was that they look the way I felt when that current was running between Tyler and me.

  I must have looked pretty sad watching the selects, because my father said, “They’re only acting, Maggie.”

  I told him I didn’t care. That Tyler wasn’t my BOYfriend, just a friend.

  “Which is all you should have at your age. Friends, and some of them happen to be boys. Know what I mean?”

  Why do adults always say that?

  Dad’s knocking on my door to say good night.

  Gotta go.

  A Few Minutes Later

  Dad came in with some suggestions for my party. He offered to have it catered by this fancy Mexican restaurant and hire a DJ. “Pilar can serve,” he added.

  I said I didn’t want a DJ, fancy food, or Pilar serving us.

  “I’m just trying to help, Maggie,” he said.

  I told him the biggest help would be if he left us alone. And made sure Mom did the same.

  He put a hand on my shoulder.

  “Don’t worry about her,” he said softly. “I’ll take care of it.”

  I hate worrying about my mother being drunk in front of my friends.

  But I’m glad Dad understands how I feel.

  Saturday 5/22

  7:30 P.M.

  A party for eight that starts at eight.

  Guests: Tyler, Amalia, Brendan, Sunny, Ducky, Dawn, Rico. And me.

  I have a good supply of sodas, juices, pretzels, etc.

  Pizzas are to be delivered at nine o’clock.

  Since Zeke and Tyler have been e-mailing each other, I told Zeke he could drop in on the party as long as he didn’t stay the whole time.

  I’m very nervous about the party!

  10:00 P.M.

  Tyler Kendall is an unreliable phony.

  Why did I think he’d want to come to the party anyway? He probably only said he’d come to be courteous. He’s probably at another party right now. Maybe at Felicia’s. Later he’ll have some brilliant excuse (A LIE) for why he never showed up here.

  Why didn’t he just come out and tell the truth in the first place? He says he loves the truth. He was probably afraid to say no to the producer’s daughter.

  I bet he and Felicia are laughing about how the producer’s YOUNG daughter has a crush on him.

  At 9:00, when Tyler was only an hour late, Dawn said we should wait for him to eat the pizza. I said, absolutely not! and served them as soon as they were delivered. We sat at the table by the pool, eating pizza and talking.

  Ducky said that our lives over the past few months would make a good TV series.

  “It certainly wouldn’t be a sitcom though,” said Amalia.

  “If it’s not a comedy then I don’t want my character in it,” Sunny told us.

  No one said anything. But we were all thinking, How can it be a comedy if your mother dies in it?

  “My mother would want it to be a happy series,” Sunny said softly. “She loved to laugh.”

  Dawn reached out and gave Sunny’s hand a squeeze. “You’re right,” she said.

  “It’ll be a sitcom with dramatic moments,” Ducky explained.

  “A comdram,” suggested Dawn.

  “A dramedy,” added Amalia.

  “Will I be in it?” asked Brendan.

  “Yes,” we shouted in unison.

  Amalia and Brendan beamed smiles at each other.


  We were all just fooling around about the TV show. But I was serious when I thought, Tyler won’t be in the story of my life.

  My friends are being very cool about the fact that Tyler isn’t here. They’ve mostly ignored it and have had a good time without him.

  But not Zeke!

  “If you’re having a party for Tyler, how come he’s not here?” he asked about twenty times. Finally he went to his room, but I had to promise him that I’d let him know as soon as Tyler showed up.

  Now even Zeke has given up on Tyler. I just passed his room and he’s sound asleep.

  Sunny and Ducky are shouting for me to play water polo. I better go back to my own party.

  After Midnight

  Tyler finally showed up at ten-thirty. We were all in the pool.

  “Hey, man, good to see you,” Ducky shouted.

  Brendan tossed Tyler a wet ball.

  Tyler tossed it to me. “Sorry I’m late,” he said.

  I threw the ball to Dawn, but she didn’t bother to catch it. Instead, she pulled herself out of the pool to greet Tyler.

  So did Amalia and Brendan.

  Amalia draped a towel over her shoulders and talked to Tyler while Dawn went inside to zap the leftover pizza for him.

  But I stayed in the water.

  Ducky swam to the floating ball. He hurled it to me and shouted, “We might as well get out too.”

  I was the last one out of the pool.

  Tyler was standing with my friends, acting like he hadn’t been two and a half hours late for the party. “Sorry I’m so late,” he said. “The shoot ran over, then this reporter stopped me, and —”

  I put up a hand. “It’s okay,” I said. “It’s no big deal.”

  “You’re shivering,” he said. He grabbed a towel from the chaise and wrapped it around my shoulders. “There. That’s better.”