“Are you sure you aren’t rushing into this? I mean, maybe because of what happened with Jennifer or—”
“No. Jennifer’s got nothing to do with my decision. I want a stable life in the same town; I’m tired of soulless hotel rooms and nobody waiting for me after a show.” His heart ached at the thought that Valerie could doubt his reasons for quitting. Hadn’t she been the one who always told him she missed him whenever he was away? “If I work at Berklee, I’d never have to leave Boston again. Everything will be like it used to be. It’ll be just you and me, Val. Forever.”
“Well, if you’re sure that’s what you really want...”
A beautiful smile spread across her face and he dared let a little hope fill his heart. Maybe she wasn’t disappointed by his decision, after all. He nodded.
“I think that’s the best idea you’ve had in ages, Ryan Wyler.”
The ton of bricks on his chest crumbled and he let out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.
“Really? You don’t think throwing it all away is stupid?”
She shook her head, her cute smile never leaving her face. “I’m sure the dean at Berklee would love for you to work there and I’d love to have you around again. I’ve missed you the past five years. I’ve missed what we used to have but I didn’t want to ruin your dream by acting like a possessive, whiny friend.”
His free hand came up from his thigh and stroked the side of her head, settling on her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch. He loved her. If he hadn’t been sure about his feelings before, which he had anyway, he was now. He loved this beautiful, caring and determined woman who’d saved his life more than just the three times she’d restarted his heart.
“I’ve missed those days, too and I’m sorry for how things went. I didn’t mean to neglect you. You’ve always meant the world to me, Val. And you do now, too. Nothing and no one will ever come between us anymore, I promise.”
She opened her eyes and her smile was a little sheepish this time, which reminded him of the first time he’d met her, the way she’d looked like a scared kitten and how she’d opened up with him, slowly blossoming and turning into a woman. The woman he wanted to be with. He needed to let her know how he felt, but his brain couldn’t come up with a smart opening line.
He cleared his throat, suddenly nervous. He’d never been nervous around Valerie, he’d never had trouble telling her he loved her, but now that he had to admit his kind of love was the one with the big L, the one that he hoped would last forever, he felt worse than the first time he’d walked out onto a stage in front of a huge audience.
“Well, apparently we both did choose carefully whom we wanted to date, huh?” He let out a shaky chuckle. His stomach tied itself into intricate knots, judging by the way it hurt. He brought both his hands to his abdomen and interlocked his fingers on top of it. “It’s funny how we tried to live our lives separately and ended up getting cheated on by our partners. Don’t you think fate might be behind all this?”
“I’d rather say it was bad luck and maybe lack of good judgment, too. I mean, we should’ve known better than to date a playboy and a model. It was doomed from the very beginning.”
Valerie shrugged and looked away. Ryan’s hope sank just a little deeper. He couldn’t get discouraged, though. Not yet. He needed to help her see what he knew was their destiny.
“After all I’ve been through, I really think fate has had an important role in our lives, Val. I mean, if they hadn’t called you to fill in for your colleague, I wouldn’t have gone to see Jen and I would’ve never found out she was cheating on me, so I’d still be dating someone who didn’t care about me.” Her gaze softened and her teeth played with her bottom lip. It was the right time to press on with his speech, lay out all the cards and see how it would end. “Plus, if you hadn’t been on duty, I would probably be dead, because another doctor wouldn’t have cared as much as you did: I would’ve been just another patient, an unlucky guy who had a bad car accident and died because it was his time. Not to mention that my crashing the car and nearly dying helped you get over your fears and go back to the operating room. So, yes,” he continued, looking her straight in the eye, ready to deliver the final words that would put him out of his misery once and for all. “I do think fate’s had a hand in all this and I think I might have understood what it wanted to tell me—to tell us.”
Valerie tilted her head to one side and arched an eyebrow. “You lost me.”
“Val,” he croaked, almost choking on the word. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I... Um...”
He looked up and when their eyes met, a cold chill like an electrical shock ran all along his spine. His heart rate picked up and the steady beep from the machine next to his bed gave him away. He had to say it and face the consequences.
“I love you, Val,” he finally said, staring at his clasped hands. He was afraid that if he looked into her eyes, he’d see the rejection he was dreading. “All that’s happened in the past few days has opened my eyes and made me understand that what I was looking for had been by my side my whole life. Well, for nearly seventeen years, to be precise.”
Valerie flinched slightly on the bed and Ryan cringed. What an idiot. He’d misunderstood her feelings and had ruined the most precious thing he’d ever had.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. My feelings are all over the place now and maybe I’m just confused. I... Damn, I’ve ruined everything.” He’d rushed into this, needing to let her know how he felt, when he should’ve taken it slow, showed her how good things between them could be as a couple and help her realize they could have a future as more than just best friends. He didn’t dare to look up at her; Feeling her flinch at his words had been enough to understand she didn’t feel the same.
“No, you haven’t, you eejit.” She put a hand over his clasped ones. Her touch was warm and soothing. “You’re my best friend, and you’ve been my North star ever since I met you. Nothing in this world could ever spoil our friendship or push me away from you.” He finally looked up and she was smiling, although her eyes were damp. “The past few days have been quite tough for me too, and only God knows how I felt when I thought I was losing you. My life wouldn’t mean anything without you, Ryan. It started the day I met you, and now I know for sure I’d never in a million years be able to love anyone in this world the way I love you.”
She blushed, and Ryan was afraid to build his hopes up in case he’d misunderstood.
“You mean...”
“I mean I love you, you eejit, and not the way I used to love you, not like my best friend, but more like a soul mate, more like... like I couldn’t possibly imagine a life without you in it.”
He couldn’t stop the smile that broke across his face, and he pulled her close to him. Their eyes locked and they stared at each other for some long, endless seconds. He lifted his hand and stroked her cheek softly, as if he was scared she would flinch again and stand up. But she didn’t flinch, nor did she stand up; instead, she closed her eyes at his touch, and he knew nothing else mattered, nothing else but that moment with her.
He leaned forward just slightly and, while her eyes were still closed, he brushed her lips with his, softly, gently, like their first kiss years before. When the tip of his tongue ran along her bottom lip, she didn’t offer any resistance; she leaned into him and kissed him back, giving as much as she got, leaving him breathless and happy. Their lips fit like two matching puzzle pieces, and he would never let anyone or anything between them, ever again.
Their grandfathers had been right; they had always known their grandchildren would end up falling in love, in spite of all the times Ryan and Valerie had denied it. If they could see them, from wherever they were now, they would be smiling and nodding approvingly.
At the very moment their lips touched, Ryan felt as if he could fly out of that bed and reach the moon, as if that missing piece in his heart, in his life, had finally gone back into place, as if all the roads h
e had traveled had finally brought him home, even if he was miles away from his real home in Ireland.
But home would always be where Valerie was, and home would always mean being at her side. He knew it now, for sure. No more traveling around, no more tours, interviews, photo shoots—no more of that crazy life. He would finally be with the love of his life, they would never part, and everything would be perfect. Everything would flow smoothly, just like his fingers flowed on a piano keyboard, creating a beautiful melody, the melody he had been longing to hear all of his life, the only melody he would want to hear until the end of his days.
The melody of true love.
Chapter 36
“Here’s my favorite doctor, at last,” Ryan said, as soon as Valerie walked into his room after another long shift was over. “Where have you been? I’ve missed you.”
“Good morning, Jazz Star. Did you sleep well?”
Valerie smiled and when she met his eyes, the weariness she’d been feeling only moments before disappeared. One beautiful smile from Ryan was enough to make her forget she’d been working non-stop all night through, with barely the time for toilet breaks. Technically, her shift wasn’t over yet but everything seemed quiet now that the night was over, so she’d taken a quick break and rushed upstairs to see him.
She still couldn’t believe they’d kissed the day before and that now not only were they the best of friends, but a couple of sweethearts, too. Thinking about Ryan as her boyfriend was a little strange, given how long they’d been repeating to everyone that they were just friends, but it also felt right. She was sure it wouldn’t take them long to adjust to their new status—and she couldn’t wait for him to leave the hospital so that they could explore this new part of their relationship.
Ryan held out his hand and waited for her to approach the bed and take it. When she did, he pulled her toward him and kissed her slowly. Valerie braced one hand on the side railing of his bed while the other went automatically to his stubbled cheek.
Although she knew it wasn’t professional, since he was still her patient, she didn’t find the strength to pull back. Now that she knew what kissing him, really kissing him, was like, she would never get enough of tasting him on her lips, of feeling his fingers brush her cheeks gently or his hand stroking her neck. She was so in love she feared her heart was going to burst.
“I love you,” Ryan whispered, inches away from her lips. His warm breath against her mouth stirred the butterflies in her chest to life. He kissed the tip of her nose and she smiled.
“I love you, too. But I’m your doctor and this is definitely not professional.”
She pulled back and straightened the stethoscope around her neck. He laughed and took her hand, pulling her back down on his bed.
“I know, but you’re so sexy in that white coat...”
“Ryan. You’ll get me fired!” She slapped his hand away, and he laughed harder, a mischievous look in his eyes.
“Don’t worry, I’ll tell them it’s a new therapy—a sort of CPR for VIP patients.” He stroked her cheek and his eyes turned a warm shade of caramel with little flecks of green. Gosh, he was beautiful. How had she ever managed to be immune to his charm for so long?
“Come here now,” he said, pulling her by the collar of her coat and waggling his eyebrows. “Give me one last kiss, and then I promise I’ll behave.”
“Will ya?” she asked, cocking an eyebrow. He nodded, batting his eyelashes in his best good boy expression. “All right then, only a quick one.”
“Maybe not so quick,” he whispered, just before his lips brushed hers in a sweet kiss that quickly turned into something way less fraternal.
“Whoa, is that the kind of therapy patients get in here? ’Cause I might break a leg just to end up in this ward!”
Valerie gave a start and pulled away, but she didn’t turn back. She’d recognized the voice and she wished she could walk out of the room with her back to him, so she wouldn’t have to see his reaction.
She’d been dying to tell Karen, but their shifts hadn’t matched and they hadn’t seen each other yet. Once she’d told Karen and had listened to her rambling on about how she’d always known it, Valerie was sure Kevin would show up and do the same with Ryan. Kevin and Karen had taken their relationship one step further now, and they’d moved into Kevin’s apartment only a couple of weeks before—if they’d had no secrets before, they wouldn’t have any now.
She hadn’t expected Kevin would show up so soon, especially since Ryan and she hadn’t had time to talk about how they would break the news to their friends. She hoped that, since she was supposed to be working now, she could simply walk out of the room and leave Ryan to handle the situation with his former roommate. Not that she was taking the easy way out or anything, but she was supposed to be back in the ER by now so it wasn’t really an excuse.
She closed her eyes, inhaled deeply and let it all out in a whoosh before turning back to face Kevin. Her cheeks were on fire and she braced herself for one of his silly jokes. Instead, when he saw it was her, all color drained from Kevin’s face, and Valerie feared he’d pass out.
“What the... Valerie? Wait, no, this can’t be... did I really see... I mean, were you two... man, wait till I tell Karen!” He raked his fingers through his wavy hair and pulled at the strands, giving them an even wilder look than they had before. “What’s going on, guys? What happened to the brother-and-sister nonsense you kept feeding us all these years?”
“It wasn’t nonsense, Kev; it was how we felt,” Ryan said, taking Valerie’s hand and rubbing it with his thumb. “Things have changed—no big deal.”
“No big deal? Are you kidding me? This deserves the six o’clock news—”
“No!” Ryan and Valerie both said at the same time. Kevin stared at them as if they had gone crazy.
“Aww, come on, I didn’t mean literally! I know you don’t want your private life to be splattered all over the newspapers, Ryan. Do you think I’d be so stupid?”
Valerie’s shoulders relaxed and she felt this would be the right time for her to leave the room and avoid Kevin’s inquisition. She moved toward the door, sidestepping him.
“Running away from the embarrassing questions, are we, Doctor?” He put a hand on her shoulder and grinned. “Karen will want to know all the gory details—I’ll take care of Ryan, and she’ll take care of you. You can’t run away from it forever.”
“I have to work, Kevin; I’m not running away from anything.”
“Indeed,” he said with a smirk and a twinkle in his eyes. She blushed hard and looked away. “Go back to your patients, Doctor Fogarty; I’ll take care of this one.”
Ryan brought a hand to his face and covered his eyes dramatically, as if he was expecting the worst of times, but he was smiling.
“Just take it easy, please. He’s still weak, and he shouldn’t be allowed to see people who can upset him.”
“Me? Upset him? Come on, I’m his first American friend. I’d never do anything that could upset him, would I, Ryan?”
Ryan smiled. “I’ll press the emergency button if I need your help.”
Valerie nodded, glaring at Kevin to show she meant business, but the only effect was to make him chuckle.
“Will you be back, later?” Ryan asked her with puppy eyes, and for a second she almost forgot Kevin was there. All she wanted to do was take his face in her hands and kiss him.
“I’ll be back once my shift is over, yes.”
Kevin raised his thumbs at her and she left the room shaking her head but sporting a silly, love-struck grin.
“So, wanna tell me what happened?” Kevin asked, pulling a chair next to Ryan’s bed and plopping down on it.
“Yeah, I almost died, but I’m fine now, Kev; thanks for asking.”
Kevin rolled his eyes and pulled his right leg up, resting his ankle on his left knee.
“By the way you were kissing her it was obvious you were perfectly fine—that’s why I didn’t ask. Come on now, spill it!”
“What do you want me to say? It just happened. You fell for Karen, and I fell for Valerie. End of the story.”
“I wasn’t Karen’s best friend or the brother she’d never had when we started dating, though. And I wasn’t dating a hot model either. What happened to Jennifer?”
“It’s over.” Ryan shrugged, anger and disappointment settling in the pit of his stomach once again. He didn’t want to think about Jennifer anymore. Truth be told, he’d never really loved her, just like she had never loved him. “I caught her in bed with her manager; she came here just yesterday, we had a fight, and I told her it was over.”
“And you kissed Valerie,” Kevin said, wearing a knowing grin. “Or was it she who kissed you?”
“I did.” He smiled as he recalled the moment their lips had met. “Being close to death made me realize lots of things. My love for her was one of them.”
“Can I be your best man, then?”
Ryan frowned. “What are you talking about?”
“Come on, I know you’re gonna end up marrying her. She’s your soul mate, it’s written all over your face—heart-shaped eyes and silly smile.”
Ryan laughed and didn’t contradict him. He couldn’t deny he’d been feeling like a lovesick teenager since he’d kissed Valerie.
“So I want to be your best man; after all, I’ve always known it would end up like this, ever since you first told me about her. I’ve always tried to make you two get together. It’s the least you can do.”
Kevin was right: he probably would end up marrying Valerie. Spending the rest of his life with her was something he could easily imagine doing.
“You have my word,” he said, holding out a hand to Kevin. “But only if I’ll be yours.”
“Deal.” Kevin grinned, shaking his hand.
It felt like the days when they shared the same room and talked about where they would be in twenty years. He’d always be thankful to his grandfather’s friend Clyde, who’d helped him get the audition at Berklee when Ryan was seventeen and still thinking he’d study in Dublin and become a music teacher. Clyde, who’d been a former teacher at the famous Boston conservatory, had heard him play at the Club and helped him submit his admission application. If the man hadn’t been traveling to Dublin with a group of friend and hadn’t bumped into his old friend Thomas Wyler, Ryan’s destiny would have been completely different. For once, he never would have met Kevin, who’d played an important part in Ryan’s life in America. Maybe Valerie wouldn’t have become a surgeon, if they’d stayed in Dublin and her mother had had a say in her life. Then, since he never would have become famous, he wouldn’t have met Jennifer and wouldn’t have had the accident that, eventually, made him realize his real feelings for Valerie. Yes, he’d always be grateful to his grandfather and his friend for offering him the opportunity of a lifetime that not only helped him pursue his dream and an outstanding career, but that had also made him meet a loyal friend who, Ryan knew, would be part of his life forever.
A Love Melody Page 19