A Form of Justice

by Dawn Marsanne

  Although Will had further to drive to work, he also had the option of taking the train. In addition, they had just had some good news about their house in Manchester and had accepted an offer on it.

  ‘Will, do you have anything urgent to do this morning?’ asked Gina.

  ‘No, just some emails to respond to. I’m only part-time at the moment, remember.’

  ‘Good. We need to talk.’

  ‘Let me make some coffee first,’ he said.

  Gina looked at the news on her phone whilst Will was busy in the kitchen. He returned with two mugs of coffee and sat down opposite her.

  ‘Thanks. Which pods are these?’

  ‘The purple ones.’

  ‘Which sort of coffee I mean.’

  ‘No idea. Purple coffee!’

  Gina laughed. ‘Well, it’s very smooth, even though not very purple.’

  Will was relieved that finally, Gina seemed to be showing some emotion. The first week in the hospital was so unreal, and he had put it down to delayed shock.

  ‘I’ve reached a decision, Will. I’m not going back to work, as a barrister, I mean.’

  ‘Gina, darling, you don’t have to make such a momentous decision so soon. You need to give it time. Your chambers have said that you must take as much time as you like.’

  ‘Yes, and that’s very nice of them, but it’s time for a change. I don’t feel it’s appropriate for me to prosecute others when I’ve got so many skeletons in the cupboard.’

  ‘And everyone else is perfect?’

  ‘I’m not talking about everyone else, this is about me, and I have to do what I feel is right. I’ve spent over thirty years hiding my past, and although I’m not exactly going to go around shouting about it, I have to do what my conscience is telling me.’

  ‘But you’re good at it, and you enjoy it, don’t you?’

  ‘I’m not sure whether I actually enjoy it. I studied law because my father told me to. As you know, he was a businessman but seemed to have an obsession with me entering the legal profession.’

  ‘You’ve had a good career, I never thought that you didn’t enjoy it.’

  ‘Well, I suppose the thing is that you become accustomed to the job and the longer you do it, the harder it is to make a change. It seems foolish to throw it away and do something else.’

  ‘So, in that case, wouldn’t it be better to stay with the same career?’

  ‘I could, but this incident is sort of a natural break. After all, I’ve been in the legal profession for thirty years, that’s long enough.’

  ‘Well, you know I’ll support your decision whatever it is,’ said Will.

  ‘I know, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you and love you. I’m surprised you want anything to do with me after the things I did to Patsy or Trish as she prefers to call herself.’

  ‘But you were children and children can be very cruel. Your parents should have shown you more discipline, and the school should have picked up on what was happening.’

  ‘I was fourteen and old enough to know the difference between right and wrong.’

  ‘But Trish was an adult, and she should have known that whatever her grievances were, that was no way to elicit a confession or an apology from you.’

  ‘I ruined her life, and she’s lived with that mental torment for so many years. She must have hated going into school each day, never knowing what I would do. I constantly damaged her possessions, eroded her confidence, called her names. I tried my best to turn the whole form against her.’

  ‘We’ve all done things we regret, and I still think you are blaming yourself too much.’

  ‘I broke three of her fingers by stamping on them, for God’s sake! That was unforgivable. I would have carried on if someone hadn’t spotted us.’

  Will shrugged as he was unable to find the words to assuage his wife’s remorse.

  ‘Do you know, I think I might have gone on to kill her? I think I was possessed. I’ve been dreaming about the incident, and I realise how close I came to committing the ultimate crime.’

  ‘I think you are exaggerating,’ said Will. ‘After the trauma you’ve suffered, you are bound to be having difficulty looking at things objectively.’

  ‘I know what I was like in those days, I have to admit it to myself.’

  Will smiled reassuringly at Gina.

  ‘In my counselling sessions, we’ve been talking a lot about my childhood and my parents. It’s been really helpful, and it’s good to stop brushing things under the carpet,’ she paused. ‘My father was a bully, I realise that now. He didn’t physically abuse my mother, and he gave her a comfortable lifestyle, nice holidays, a cleaner and someone to look after the garden, but he just totally dominated her. She never had a say in anything, and that must have rubbed off on me, made me think that we can just get what we want all the time. Also, I’m sure he had lots of affairs with other women, and my mother turned a blind eye to it.’

  ‘Really? You’ve never mentioned it before.’

  ‘No, well, it’s not something I wanted to remember, I must have tried to blank it out. Remember that weekend, just before Mum went into the home? She talked about Brenda from the bridge club.’

  ‘Oh, yes, I remember her saying about her flaunting herself to your Dad.’

  ‘Yes, I remember her, but when I was in my teens, I didn’t know whether anything was going on. It was later, once when I came back from University, unexpectedly. Mum was out, and I saw Brenda leaving the house one afternoon as I reached our road.’

  ‘Oh, Gina, I’m so sorry. I never realised your childhood was like that.’

  ‘How could you? As regards Trish, I don’t know how she has coped for so long with the festering resentment, then it was just triggered, by my presence at the inquiry. Well, I assume that’s what it was. Unless there was something else going on at the same time.’

  ‘Well, she’s away from us now and hopefully will be for a while.’

  ‘She doesn’t deserve to be in prison, I hope they let her out, she needs help.’

  ‘Another coffee?’

  ‘No thanks.’

  Will returned. ‘Another cup of purple!’

  ‘The other thing which upsets me is the fact that you had to find out about my past this way. I should have had the courage to tell you about what I was like when I met you. I really am a coward.’

  ‘No you aren’t, you are blaming yourself too much, I know I keep saying that but it’s the way I feel. Will paused and sipped his coffee. ‘I still feel that Trish wanted to kill you by the railway, otherwise, why take you there?’

  ‘She needed to make me afraid to elicit a confession. She was desperate.’

  ‘Have the police contacted you again?’

  ‘Yes, they want me to speak to them later this week. I need to finalise my statement.’

  ‘And are you sure she didn’t want to kill you?’

  ‘I can’t be sure sure what she intended to do.’

  Will shook his head.

  ‘But Will, think about it. There were no other witnesses, it’s my word against hers. She’s had a troubled past and is clearly mentally ill. It would be so hard to prove she wanted to kill me.’

  ‘I would hope that the psychologists could tell whether she was telling the truth.’

  ‘Well, we can’t speak for them. She will have told them how I bullied her at school. There’s no doubt about that. I just hope she can get some treatment and rebuild her life. She will be closely monitored, so it’s not like she will just be let loose on society again, not until they are sure she’s not a risk to others or herself.’

  ‘OK, I understand,’ replied Will with resignation. ‘So, what do you plan to do if you aren’t going to be a barrister?’

  ‘Well, I’ll still be available if there are any loose ends to tie up with the Benton inquiry, although Julius has been coping admirably. Also, I’m going to continue with my work on the parliamentary committee, and I might get some consultancy work, I’ve not
really thought it through properly yet. And, I’m going to do some charity work.’

  ‘Any particular sort of charity?’

  ‘Well, I’m going to do some work with amputees, and also I think I should get involved with the anti-bullying campaign. I’m going to admit to what I did, and then I’ll be free. It’s time it was out in the open.’

  ‘Are you sure? I mean about the bullying? It will be emotionally painful.’

  ‘I’m sure.’

  ‘Come here, give me a hug!’

  **

  Melanie was making good progress and was now back at work full-time. She was still having counselling on a weekly basis, and that would continue for some time yet. She had started a Spanish language class one evening a week, and swam three times a week after work. The news about her previous counsellor had shocked her to the core. The sessions with Trish had given no hint that she was having her own mental health crisis, but of course, the emphasis was on herself and not Trish. Nevertheless, Melanie felt horrified that her own mental health had been entrusted to someone suffering from their own mental distress.

  Her mobile rang. ‘Hi, Ben, everything OK?’

  ‘Yes, busy so I’ll be quick. I just wondered if you are doing anything on Friday, evening, I mean.’

  Ben was an acquaintance of Rob’s, Izzy’s partner. Melanie had met him one weekend at a birthday party at their house and had liked him immediately. He wasn’t unlike Dr Spencer who she’d seen in hospital and had caused Izzy’s heart to flutter.

  ‘Er, nothing in particular.’

  ‘I wondered whether you fancied going out for a meal, pizza or something. Anywhere you fancy.’

  ‘I would, thank you. That sounds great,’ replied Melanie, smiling.

  ‘Oh, well, that’s fab. Shall I meet you somewhere?’

  ‘Why not collect me at my flat. I’ll text you my address.’

  ‘Excellent. Right, I’ll have to go now. Bye!’

  Melanie disconnected. Finally, her life was beginning to come together. She couldn’t wait to tell Izzy her news.

  **

  Susan heard the post drop through the letterbox and went to collect it. There was a hand-addressed letter, and she recognised the writing. Taking the letter through to the lounge, she sat down and opened it, unfolding the single page of notepaper.

  Dear Susan,

  I am writing this short letter to apologise for the disgraceful way I stole your identity and capitalised on your illness in order to trick Gina Overton. It was a despicable thing to do, and I still cannot believe I treated you like that. I am not asking you to forgive me. I do not expect it, and I assume our friendship is at an end.

  I simply want to wish you a full recovery from your illness. You have suffered enough. Please forget you ever knew me and the evil things I have done. Perhaps that will help you to recover emotionally from the shock of the way I exploited you.

  Best wishes

  Trish.

  Susan put the letter down and closed her eyes. If only they had been able to convince the teachers what was happening all those years ago, then all this could have been avoided. It was a tragedy which had continued to play out over the decades, and it was too awful for words. Susan closed her eyes, alone with her thoughts, feeling totally despondent.

  Chapter 55

  Trish was deemed to be fit to attend court and pleaded guilty to drugging Gina, using threatening behaviour and endangering her life through reckless conduct. However, she was found to be mentally traumatised due to incidents in her childhood home, and the sustained bullying at school. Gina had also issued a statement admitting her part in historical incidents at Stourford School, and this was accepted by the judge. The authorities decided there was no concrete evidence that she had wanted to murder Gina, merely that she had wanted to leave her with an everlasting feeling of guilt at being the cause of someone’s suicide.

  ‘Patricia Joanne Webster, you have pleaded guilty to the charges,’ said Judge Shaw. ‘Your victim sustained life-changing injuries and was extremely lucky not to lose her life. The fact that you pleaded guilty and fully recognise the seriousness of your crimes is in your favour. You have also spent three months on remand, and that will also be taken into account. I have also considered the mental health reports which demonstrate that your desire for retribution stemmed from a traumatised childhood and more recently, a breakdown in your mental health. Despite this, it is my duty to point out that whatever you were hoping to achieve, this is not a form of justice we can condone in any way.’

  ‘The mental health reports I have studied from your time at HMP Bronzefield show that you have made good progress and have been willing to accept help. Therefore, you are not judged to be a danger to society. Despite this, there are concerns that you may attempt to take your life again and it is the duty of the authorities to provide a safe environment for you.’

  ‘I am going to issue a sentence of eighteen months in prison, suspended for two years. The mental health assessments state that you should receive help outside the confines of prison, in an appropriate environment, therefore, a place has been secured for you at St Martin’s Hospital, near Canterbury. Ultimately, it is hoped that you will be able to return to your own home, and receive support from a Community Mental Health Team.’

  Trish smiled at her husband and also at Beth and Derek who were in the court for the sentencing. Thus, she left the court to be taken to her new abode on the outskirts of Canterbury. Tom was so relieved that Trish would be out of prison and closer to home. Whilst she was an inpatient, he planned to return to work, and the surgery had agreed that he could reduce his hours to spend time supporting his wife.

  Their relationship had changed immeasurably, and though it could never return to exactly how it had been before, Tom still had faith in their future together. Trish had offered him the chance to make a fresh start, but he didn’t want to abandon her, they had been through too much together to simply throw it all away. He himself was having counselling to cope with the dreadful events as he was consumed with guilt that he had not shown more interest in his wife’s mental well-being.

  **

  The police informed Gina about the outcome of Trish’s trial and within a few hours, the report appeared on the local news websites. She still felt that Will believed Trish should receive a harsher sentence, but Gina truly believed that she had suffered enough, and it was society’s responsibility to give her the mental health support she needed. Gina sincerely hoped that in the future, Trish could fulfil her potential without the encumbrances of her painful past and fulfil any ambitions she still held.

  Gina’s last conversation with Trish had been that fateful night beside the railway line when emotions were at breaking point. Although she knew there was truth in the old adage that time was a great healer, she needed some further closure. Though it might not be possible to meet Trish in person, she needed to make contact and decided to write her a letter. Gina had no idea whether they would actually give the letter to her in the hospital, but she felt it was the right thing to do.

  Dear Trish,

  Perhaps you don’t want to hear from me? I will understand if that is the case, but I need to write down my feelings, and I hope that you will find it in your heart to read my words.

  I wish I could turn back the clock and change the way I behaved so that you could have enjoyed your school years. I was a coward, a bully, a spoilt brat and probably many more descriptions could apply. I am truly ashamed of my behaviour.

  I do not blame you for the way you reacted after seeing me in the inquiry, and I can understand how it must have triggered the awful memories. In a way, I now feel free of my past which I had managed to push to some distant part of my memory. Now, it is time for me to make some changes in my life and to try to make amends. I will leave the decision to you as to whether we can meet in person, whatever your decision, I wish you a speedy recovery.

  Best wishes,

  Gina.

  Chapter 56

  �
��Hi,’ said Tom as he kissed his wife. ‘You look well.’

  ‘Thanks, I’m OK.’

  They sat next to each other on a sofa at St Martin’s Hospital and held hands.

  ‘How are you settling in?’

  ‘OK, actually, I like it here, it’s peaceful. We can go for walks in the grounds, the trees will be lovely in the spring.’

  ‘I noticed how quiet it was when I parked up.’

  ‘Yes, it’s so quiet at night, you can’t hear anything,’ she paused. ‘How’s work?’

  ‘OK, the usual problems but it’s ticking over. We’ve appointed another GP, so that should ease the pressure a bit. Also, I’m going to reduce my hours, so they are advertising for another Practice Manager to job share.’

  ‘Are you sure, Tom? I don’t want you to give up your job because of me, you are so good at it.’

  ‘There are things which are more important than work, I want to spend more time with you. My mind is made up.’

  ‘Well, I had better make sure I get out of here as soon as I can. I really want to get better.’

  ‘That’s good to hear.’

  ‘I realise that my counselling days are over, I need to focus on keeping myself on an even keel. I’ll have time for some new hobbies.’

  ‘It’s too soon to be making decisions about work.’

  ‘No, I’ve decided, it’s too much for me. I can’t cope with the stress of it any longer.’

  Tom squeezed her hand, he didn’t want to spend their precious time together arguing.

  ‘Which reminds me, any news about Melanie?’ asked Trish.

  ‘No, sorry, I’ve been too busy to contact Francine recently. She was doing OK though, wasn’t she, last time I asked?’

  ‘Yes, I still think about her, I can’t help it.’

  ‘Beth and Derek were asking about you. They’ve been really supportive, I’m still going to have dinner with them once a week.’