As Darcy built a small fire, Elizabeth looked at the bird in confusion.
“What is the matter?”
“I am ashamed to admit I do not know what to do with it.”
“You have never prepared a bird before?”
“Never. None of us ever had anything to do in the kitchen. And I can assure you this is my first time escaping highwaymen and preparing dinner in the forest.”
Darcy showed her how to prepare the bird. Elizabeth learned quickly and soon, the tempting smell of roasting meat came toward them. Darcy tore slices for them, discreetly giving most of them to Elizabeth. She perked up quickly with the food.
“You are to be commended, sir,” she said as she licked her fingers clean. Darcy watched in fascination then looked away before she noticed him staring. “My compliments to the chef.”
“You helped as much as I did,” said Darcy. “No one turns a bird as well as you.”
Elizabeth was in much better spirits as they walked. Darcy tucked his new spear into his coat pocket, feeling more confident as they went. They might not find people to give them food, but he would still provide for Elizabeth.
“I cannot wait to see my Aunt and Uncle Gardiner,” said Elizabeth. “Imagine their shock when I walk in the door. They will not know…”
Darcy interrupted her suddenly by putting out a hand and stopping her.
“What is the matter?” she asked in a low voice. Darcy looked about him, listening keenly.
“Someone is coming,” he said tersely.
Elizabeth stopped to listen. At first, she only heard their breathing. But then she heard it. Two men were coming toward them.
“Perhaps they can tell us how many miles we have left to travel?”
Darcy listened and shook his head as they grew closer.
“I know those voices.”
“How can you possibly…”
Before Elizabeth knew what he was doing, Darcy had grabbed her and swung her around so her back was pressed against a tree. He stood in front of her, his arms around her, his hands on either side of her face. She stared at him in astonishment, her heart pounding at his nearness.
“Forgive me,” he whispered. Before Elizabeth could ask him why she should need to forgive him, Darcy’s lips were on hers. For a moment, she stiffened out of sheer surprise. But as his lips warmed and grew more insistent, she forgot her surprise and gave herself over to him. His hands cupped her face, warming her as he kissed her again and again, a small growling noise in his throat. His arms wrapped around her, pulling her against him tightly. Elizabeth wound her arms around his neck and up into his hair. She had often wondered what it would feel like. The smell of him overwhelmed her, and her scenes drowned in him. She almost forgot to breathe as she felt Darcy’s warm hands on hers, sliding up and down her back and holding her tighter. She almost forgot they were not alone until a bark of laughter interrupted them.
“What’s going on here?”
Darcy paused for a moment then turned toward them, holding Elizabeth’s face against his shoulder so they could not see her.
“What does it look like?” he demanded in a rough accent Elizabeth had never heard him use before.
Elizabeth turned her head slightly just enough to catch sight of the men. When she saw their faces, she almost wished she had not. No wonder their voices had sounded familiar. They had been in the inn when she and Darcy had been taken there. They had argued with Jerry and asked that they take part in their abduction so they might share in the money. If they recognised her and Darcy, they were doomed.
One of the men frowned and took a step toward him.
“You look familiar. Do I know you?”
“I should say not,” snapped Darcy. There was not a trace of his usual cultured accent. Elizabeth could almost have believed he had never been within one hundred miles of Pemberley. She could only hope his beard and peasant clothes would fool the men into not realising who they beheld. “Now, do you mind? It took me months to save up for a woman. I have things I’d much rather do right now than talk to you.”
The men laughed coarsely. “In this cold? Aye, that will warm you up. I don’t suppose you might pass her onto us when you’re done with her?”
Elizabeth felt Darcy’s arms tighten about her and felt the low rumble in his chest.
“I should think not. I have bought her for a few days, and I intend to take full advantage. I’ll not have you distract me by hanging about waiting for your turn. Go buy your own.”
One of the men held up his hands in surrender.
“Right enough. I can’t begrudge a man a little comfort. Besides, I think the last one gave me a parting gift that will cause me many a painful day and night for some time to come. I hope you have better fortune with yours.”
Elizabeth felt Darcy’s warm, steady heartbeat beneath her as she lay against him with his sheltering arms about her. Her own heart pounded as she waited to see what the men would do next. Before she realised it, she was pressed back against the tree, and Darcy’s hands and mouth were on her once more, making it hard for her to think straight as she responded without being able to stop. Elizabeth scarcely heard the course laughter and cheers as the men moved on. It was quite some time before Darcy released her. He gave her one last, soft kiss then stood back a little shakily. Elizabeth had to lean her head against his chest. She could feel his heart pounding hard.
“Are they gone?” she whispered. Darcy’s chin rested on the top of her head as his fingers gently pressed and caressed the back of her neck.
“They are gone,” he whispered. Elizabeth slumped against him for a moment as she tried to get her jumbled thoughts back in order. She could barely think straight. Who knew she could feel something like that?
Darcy’s breathing seemed to take longer to return to normal than hers. When he finally released her, he did not seem too steady.
“We should go before they come back,” he said. His voice was low and thick, almost a growl. Elizabeth nodded and brushed down her gown, which had become disarranged as they kissed. After walking in silence for some time, she added, “Your accent was excellent. I did not know you are an accomplished actor.”
Darcy gave a little laugh. “I used to entertain Georgiana by mimicking different accents and voices. It entertained her and made her laugh. I never thought it might become essential.”
“You are a fast thinker,” she said, feeling a little confused.
“I had to be. If they knew who we were, they would have taken us in a moment. I did not know if they had weapons on them, and I was not about to find out.” He stopped walking and turned to her. “I must beg your pardon. I took advantage of you when you were under my protection. It is unforgivable, though I…”
Elizabeth’s heart sank. So he thought of that kiss only in terms of how necessary it was and nothing more. How could he be so calm when her head was still swimming, and her limbs could barely keep her moving?
“You have nothing to apologise for,” she said. “I know it was necessary. I am not so missish that I will pretend offence when you did what you had to do to protect us both. Let there be no silly talk of taking advantage. You need not feel any regret.” She smiled at him and walked on.
Chapter 25
Darcy caught up to her side, and they were both silent as they sought to put as many miles between them and the men as possible. Elizabeth’s face burned whenever she thought of that kiss, and she did so often. How could Darcy see it as merely necessary? Had all the feelings been on her side alone?
No, they could not have been. Darcy had barely been in control when he held her. But perhaps any man might have been the same with any woman? She was not experienced enough to know any different, never having kissed anyone before that day. Perhaps now he had cooled off, he regretted what he did. If he had been hoping to find a way to escape their marriage, he might have felt the kiss might place an unwanted obligation on him.
Well, she was not Lydia or Kitty. She would not throw herself at
a man and demand he marry her at the smallest provocation. She would not howl and weep. Once they arrived in London, they would talk and decide what to.
Darcy was silent as they walked. His face was troubled, and though he responded to her comments, he always lapsed into silence again. Once or twice, Elizabeth glanced at him out of the corner of her eye to see a look of anger on his face.
Very well, she told herself. If he regrets it, I will not regret him. But though she told herself this repeatedly and even stirred up some feelings of anger toward him, she could not prevent her heart from sinking.
There was an hour of daylight left when Darcy’s face grew animated for the first time since their kiss.
“A church,” he said. “Perhaps they will allow us to sleep inside tonight. Or at least you. I can always make a shelter.”
“If I am sleeping inside, so are you,” said Elizabeth.
“Not if they only allow one of us…”
“Well, there is little point in arguing about it before we have even arrived,” she said tartly. She walked ahead of him. If she’d looked behind her, she would have seen the dismay in his eyes.
Elizabeth was already speaking to the cleric when Darcy caught up with her. The cleric introduced himself as Mr John Graham. He was younger than Darcy would have expected for such an isolated place, and surprisingly handsome. He was sure a man like this would have done well in London.
“Please, come in,” he urged them. “I only have a handful of parishioners, so I am not overwhelmed with supplies, but I will offer you what I can.”
“As long as you can offer anything to my wife, I am content,” said Darcy. Elizabeth threw him a look, but the cleric smiled.
“If you were unmarried, that would be the case as I only have a small room to spare with a small bed. But as you are married, you may be assured of a bed for the night, Mr…”
“Gardiner,” said Darcy. “And this is my wife, Elizabeth.” His mind reeled at the idea of sharing a bed with Elizabeth so soon after that kiss. He already loathed himself for taking advantage of her, but when he attempted to tell her he had not regretted it, she had shut it down at once.
He must not forget she had disliked him. Perhaps that had not changed. He could not tell himself that her manner toward him had altered when they were in such strange circumstances. They had to work together and be companions during an uncertain time, and Elizabeth was sensible enough to understand it would be easier if they were on friendly terms. While he would have to marry her anyway after everything that had happened, he loathed the thought of having her marry him under sufferance.
And now, to share a bed with her when he was still fired by their encounter earlier, would test his fortitude to its capacity. Perhaps the cold night air might be what he needed after all.
The cleric insisted they share his dinner with him. He apologised for the humble fare as they sat down to boiled mutton and potatoes. It was the sort of food Darcy loathed, but he fell to it eagerly, often stopping to praise the cooking. The cleric had the same light, easy manner as Elizabeth and as they both talked and laughed as if they had known one another for years, Darcy looked on with increasing jealousy.
“May I ask how you came to be in this place?” Elizabeth asked. “You are rather isolated here.”
John smiled. “Yes, I am. But it is what I wanted.” John stared down at his plate for a moment. “I craved solitude. My wife died two years ago, you see. She had family in this parish who were very dear to her. Being here helps me feel closer to her.”
Darcy stared at him aghast. The cleric was so young. He looked at Elizabeth and tried to imagine…
No, he could not even allow his mind to consider it. How did a man endure such a loss? How would he ever recover from it? He does not… he should not.
“I am so sorry,” said Elizabeth. “It is a tragedy when you had your whole lives ahead of you. Were you married for a long time?”
The cleric smiled. “Not long enough, but I believe if we had been married one hundred years, I would not have felt it was long enough. She brightened everything. She was so young and happy.”
“What happened?” Elizabeth asked in a soft voice.
“One of our neighbours was ill,” said John. “Suzanne visited her daily to care for her. But she fell ill from the same disease.“ He paused to take a sip of his wine. “She was expecting our first child.”
Darcy swallowed. He could not imagine how anyone could survive such pain. Sometimes he imagined Elizabeth carrying his child and the joy he would feel when she told him he was to be a father. To lose the woman he loved at the height of such joy was unspeakably cruel.
“I am very sorry for your loss,” he said, his voice gruff with emotion.
The cleric smiled and thanked him.
That evening, they joined John in his small parlour. A tiny pianoforte sat near the window. Elizabeth looked at it longingly.
“It feels so long since I played,” she said.
“It has been so long since I have heard music,” said John. “If it is not too much trouble, Mrs Darcy, I should be obliged to you if you favoured us with some music.”
Elizabeth hurried toward the pianoforte. Darcy smiled. Though Elizabeth had never struck him as an enthusiast, certainly nothing to Georgiana, it would give her one small taste of normal life after so much chaos. If he closed his eyes, he might even imagine he was in Pemberley while Elizabeth played in the drawing-room as its mistress.
John stood at Elizabeth’s side, turning the pages. He made a remark about the music and Elizabeth turned laughing eyes up at him as she murmured something in agreement. Darcy felt a burning sensation in his chest at the sight. He longed to be the one standing beside her as she played and be on the receiving end of her smiles. Yet he could not blame her if she preferred someone else. She had clearly made her opinion of him known to other people if Wickham could boast of her dislike for him. And he had used her shamefully in the woods. True, he had to prevent them from being seen, but he had done what he had wanted to do almost since the beginning of their acquaintance. He did not deserve the name of gentleman. As Elizabeth said something to John, causing him to laugh, Darcy stood up.
“I will see what the weather is like,” he said. “I am concerned I smelled snow in the air this afternoon.”
Before either of them could say anything, he strode from the room.
There was a sharp bite in the air. Darcy looked up at the clear sky. If there was to be snow, it would not arrive yet. John had informed them they were only fifteen miles from London. They could be there in two days if the roads were clear. And then Darcy would have to consider the complicated question of what to do about Elizabeth. He was sure their marriage was not legal, but he would need to consult his solicitor about that. Legal or not, they would have to wed after such an experience. But how would it be to marry a woman who did not want to be his bride? Once the excitement of the road wore off, and Elizabeth was back to normal life, her tolerance of him might turn to resentment. Could he bear that?
When Darcy returned to the parlour, John and Elizabeth were looking over a small book together. Darcy stood in the doorway, looking at the two bent heads. He shrugged off his coat to avoid looking at them.
“Is there snow?” Elizabeth asked.
“Not yet. I am confident we shall make it to London before it begins.” He nodded to the book in John’s hand. “What is that?”
“A book of poems.” Elizabeth made a face. “I told Mr Graham I have no liking for them, but he is convinced he can persuade me otherwise. After looking over the words of Mr Wordsworth, I am still not convinced. I would much rather and exciting story any day. Give me Treasure Island over a sonnet to a daffodil or whatever he is writing about.” Her dimples flashed. “Am I a terrible philistine?”
“Not at all, not at all,” said John quickly. He paused. “Well. Maybe somewhat.”
Darcy looked at them as they shared their laughter. Though they had only known the cleric a few hours, Elizab
eth already seemed happier in his company. They had the same easy manner while Darcy stood by like a dull, stiff oaf with nothing amusing to say to make Elizabeth’s eyes sparkle. He took a chair, feeling as left out as he so often did in company.
“What do you think, William? Are you a lover of poetry?” Elizabeth smiled at him. Her obvious attempt to include him in the conversation warmed Darcy’s heart.
“I have a copy of Treasure Island in my library in London,” he blurted out. “If you wish to read it.”
John looked between the two of them with a puzzled smile. “Forgive me — you have not been to your husband’s house in London?”
Darcy could have cursed himself for that slip of the tongue. That’s what he got for being so petty and jealous.
“Not yet,” said Elizabeth. “We have only recently married. I am still learning to be a wife.” She leaned toward the page as if interested in the words she must have read many times before.
John gave his gentle smile. “I understand. Married life is wonderful, but it takes some getting used to even when one is out of their minds with love for their spouse. It is like learning to be a whole other person. But it is worth it.”
Elizabeth murmured something that might have been an agreement or a denial. Darcy decided he did not want to know which.
Chapter 26
When they retired to bed that night, Darcy had never been more aware of Elizabeth by his side. He could feel her warmth but after his almost loss of control earlier, he did not trust himself to draw her into his arms as he usually did. Perhaps Elizabeth felt the same. In the moonlight, her form seemed stiff and ill at ease, causing him to curse himself for his behaviour once again earlier. Her breathing told him she was as wide awake as he was. As she shifted, he felt her brush against him and had to grit his teeth to calm his racing heart. It was a long time before he drifted to sleep.
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