by Faith Gibson
“Will you play somethin’ now?” Mal asked.
“Sure.” Andy led the others to the den and sat down at the bench. Mal sat in the chair close by, but Bryan stayed by the door, leaning against the frame the same way he did the first night Andy played for him. “What do you want to hear?”
“Somethin’ happy,” Mal answered.
Andy played the intro to Bob Seger’s “Old Time Rock and Roll” and waited to see if Mal approved. When he smiled and nodded, Andy played it again and began belting out the lyrics. Mal joined in, and by the second verse, Bryan was singing with them. Andy played several songs they all knew, and when he was finished, Mal had a genuine smile on his face. “You can give Cade a run for his money. The two of you should get together and jam.”
Andy blushed at Mal’s compliment. It felt good to let loose with something he enjoyed so much. On that high note, they all said goodnight. Mal headed upstairs while Andy and Bryan got ready for bed. They had gotten into a routine of taking turns in the bathroom before meeting in Bryan’s room. Andy hadn’t slept in his bed since the night they’d gone to Primus.
Maybe it was because they’d had such an emotional day, or it could have been the anticipation of making love the next night, but neither one moved to get naked. Andy curled up against Bryan’s body as he did every night and ran his fingertips across Bryan’s chest hair. Bryan stroked Andy’s arm slowly and placed random kisses on his temple. Andy had never felt so secure. Content. Loved. As he felt himself being pulled under, Andy whispered, “I love you, B.”
Bryan’s arm tightened around him as he said, “I love you, too, Lily.”
Andy was a ball of nerves as he went about his morning. He knew Mal had to be even more nervous because his love life was on the line. Still, Andy wanted everything about that night to be perfect. He’d woken up with silly ideas running through his head. Ideas that wouldn’t quieten in his brain, so he decided they weren’t silly after all. When Mal and Bryan finally headed to Nashville for the concert, Andy called Christy to catch up. He told her all about Bryan and listened while she talked about her last failed romance. Andy hated that his best girl friend couldn’t find a good man. She was a beautiful, smart, kind woman. Andy asked about her parents and told her about Walt and Suzette. When they had caught each other up without talking about his family, they promised to meet up soon, somewhere besides Texas. When he hung up, Andy borrowed Bryan’s truck and drove into town. He stopped by the bar to say hello to Kason since he had some time to kill. The two men shot the shit while Andy had a couple of beers. The place filled up, and several women asked Andy to dance. He turned them down, though. Now that he and Bryan were together, Andy didn’t want to have anyone else in his arms.
Kason kept asking him what had him so wound up, but Andy couldn’t tell him. He wasn’t ashamed of being gay, but considering where they were, there was no way Andy would think about breathing the word gay in DWs. He wanted to be able to visit the bar on Friday nights without the threat of getting into a fight. Instead, he blamed his mood on the full moon, and when he couldn’t sit still any longer, Andy paid his tab and headed to the store. When he got back to the farm, he still had a lot of time to kill before Bryan would return. And if he didn’t return alone? Andy’s plans would be fubar.
Bryan had promised him in bed that morning, right after he’d woken Andy with a blowjob, he would not leave Nashville until Mal and Cade reconciled. The blowjob had been a surprise, but a nice one. Smiling, Andy looked at the clock. God, he couldn’t believe in a few short hours, the two of them would consummate their relationship.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Bryan
Bryan had been crawling out of his skin all day. Andy had been a ball of live wire while at the same time his thoughts would take him somewhere else. Bryan had to call his name several times to get his attention, but he laughed at his lover when Andy would finally look up, grinning. Leaving Mal to his own planning and thoughts, Bryan and Andy set out on the horses and went their separate ways. That was probably for the best, because if they’d been together, Bryan would have wanted to get naked. Ever since they admitted they loved each other, Bryan couldn’t think about anything other than Andy and how to keep him. Bryan wasn’t a catch. He wasn’t good-looking. He wasn’t talented. But he loved Andy with everything he had, and he prayed it would be enough.
He was nervous about having sex. He had researched about anal on the internet, reading article after article on what to do to prepare and what to expect. Bryan wasn’t afraid of the pain, because everything he read said the pain quickly turned to pleasure. He was afraid Andy would find him lacking in some way and decide they shouldn’t be together. So far, that hadn’t happened when they were intimate, but they hadn’t had full out sex either.
Shaking off his nerves, Bryan turned his thoughts to the concert. Cade had left backstage passes at will call so they could stand at the side of the stage during the show, but Mal wanted to be in the audience and get the full effect. He’d never seen Cade play, and he wanted to watch his man in his element. It was probably better for Cade that way, as well. He could focus on his drums without wanting to look over at Mal every few minutes.
By the time they were ready to go, Andy was practically pushing them out the door. Andy grabbed Bryan’s arm before he could make his way outside and said, “Text me when you’re on your way and let me know if you’re alone.”
“Why? So you can rush your boyfriend out the door?” Bryan joked.
“No, so I can get ready to rush my boyfriend in the door when he comes home to me.” Andy brushed his lips across Bryan’s with a promise of what was to come later.
Bryan touched a finger to Andy’s cheek and gave him a smile. God, he loved his man. They’d only said the words the night before as they were falling asleep, but they didn’t need the words. They had the looks, the touches, the quiet moments alone. And in a few hours, they would have each other in a way no one else had.
After getting their passes at the will call window, Bryan and Mal headed into Bridgestone Arena with thousands of other concert goers. It made Bryan proud to know that they were two of the select few who knew someone in the band and would get to go backstage afterwards. Bryan had seen Cade play before, but that was before he’d become friends with the drummer. It was still surreal to know Cade considered him a friend as well. After getting a beer, they made their way down to the general admission area on the floor. “You sure you don’t want to go stand on the stage? We’ll have more elbow room.”
Mal grinned, but it was filled with trepidation. “I’m sure. I’ve never been to a rock concert, and I really want to see Cade from this viewpoint.” On the outside, Mal looked like any other fan with his Divining the Dark T-shirt. He’d left his ball cap at home, but he’d styled his hair away from his face. On the inside, Bryan knew Mal was scared shitless. In just a couple of hours he’d come face-to-face with the man he loved, and they were either making up or breaking up.
The two of them hadn’t rushed the stage like a lot of people, so they were standing about fifty feet away from the front of the crowd. The Neurotic Prophets were the only opening band. It surprised Bryan that there wasn’t more than one opener. Usually there were at least two lesser known groups to play before the headliner. The lights went down, and the crowd got rowdy. Bryan was glad to be standing farther away from the stage. After a couple of songs, a mosh pit formed toward the front, and he wasn’t a fan of pushing and shoving. Their set lasted forty-five minutes, and that included an encore. When the lights came back up for set change, Bryan asked Mal if he wanted another beer.
“No, I’m good. I’m too nervous to drink any more. I’m already about to throw up,” he admitted.
“Okay, I’ll be right back.” Bryan wedged his way through the crowd and up the steps to the concourse. While he waited in line for the restroom, he sent Andy a quick text telling him he couldn’t wait to get back home. Bryan had thought about home and what it meant to him quite a bit. He had ca
lled his siblings and chatted with each one, but when he and Brett spoke, Bryan admitted he was in love with Andy. If anyone would understand, it was his baby brother. Brett asked all the same questions that were running through Bryan’s head, and Bryan had been completely honest. Brett told him to follow his heart and he supported his big brother one hundred percent. Before they hung up, Brett promised to visit, stating he and David had some vacation time coming up, and Chicago wasn’t that far from Arlo.
After speaking with Brett, Bryan had also confided in his other siblings about Andy. Brianna had been ecstatic that he was in love, and Bryce had actually admitted to being gay as well. It hurt Bryan that his middle brother hadn’t told him before, but he could also understand it, too. Now that Bryan was with Andy, all four Moore siblings were happy with a partner. He knew it was what his mom had wanted for them all, and he could smile a little easier when thinking about her. He had a feeling she had something to do with Bryan being at the VA the day Erik came around. Why else would he end up with the perfect job, a surrogate mom, and a man who loved him for who he was?
The lights were going down just as Bryan reached Mal. The pounding of the bass drum reverberated through his chest, and he knew Mal had to feel it, too. Mal looked at him and said, “That’s Cade!” Bryan grinned and nodded. That indeed was Cade. When the spotlights came up, there he was in all his glory. Cade’s was one of the largest drum kits Bryan had ever seen. After he’d met Cade at the farm, Bryan did a little research on Cade’s time with 7’s Mistress as well as the tour for Divining the Dark. He didn’t bother to read the tabloid shit, because he knew the real man, not the one the trash mags made him out to be. Mal had told them how Cade had been in love with his former bandmate, Taggart Lee, and how he’d tried to sabotage Tag’s relationship with Erik. Bryan didn’t think badly of him for it. He’d apologized and made amends with both men.
Bryan shouldn’t have been surprised that Mal knew the words to all the songs. If his boyfriend was a rock star, he’d listen to their music nonstop as well. Hell, he did listen to Cade’s bands more than any others, and they were just friends. He already knew how badass Cade was, but when the other guys left the stage for Cade to do his solo, Bryan couldn’t help but smile at Mal’s face as he experienced Cade in all his glory. It truly was a sight to behold.
Before the show started, he and Mal had agreed to stay on the floor until the band left the stage between the final song and their first encore. Bryan figured it would take a while to get through the crowd. He pulled out his phone and texted Carl, Cade’s bodyguard and friend. When they reached the side of the stage, Carl ushered them past the barricade.
“Mal, Bryan, it’s a pleasure to meet you both. Do you want to see some of the encore before I escort you to the dressing room?” Carl asked after introducing himself. Bryan had heard all about Carl, and he immediately liked the man.
When Mal nodded, Carl led them to the side of the stage opposite from where Cade came and went. Mal’s nerves were palpable as he fisted his hands at his sides. Bryan put his hand on Mal’s shoulder and squeezed. “You’ve got this, Boss. Everything’s gonna be fine, you’ll see.”
Mal nodded, but his eyes were still wide. After Divining the Dark played two songs, Carl led them down a long hallway to a private room where they could wait. “I’m really glad you’re here, Mal. Our guy’s not been the same lately, and I’m tired of dealing with his mopey ass. I’m going to go get him. I’ll be back in a few.” Carl closed the door to the spacious room. It had a sofa and a couple of comfortable looking chairs, as well as a long table in front of a mirror that had hand towels stacked on top. There was a cooler on the floor by the sofa. Mal began pacing back and forth, but when the door opened, Bryan rushed Cade.
“Man, what a fucking show! You were phenomenal. And your drum solo? Oh my god! How do you play for that long without needing a break? Seriously, that was the shit!”
Cade’s face was cheek-to-cheek smile. He had to still be on an adrenaline high. He grabbed one of the towels and wiped the sweat from his forehead and neck. “Practice, my man. Lots of practice and gym time. How are you?” Cade asked. Before Bryan could answer, Cade saw Mal leaning against the far wall, his arms crossed over his chest. Bryan was immediately forgotten.
The two men stood and stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity but was only a few seconds before Mal said, “Hi.”
“Hi,” Cade replied, his voice cracking. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Hi, Mal. You look good.”
Mal pushed off the wall and quickly had Cade in a tight grip, devouring his mouth. As badly as Bryan wanted to know how things went after that, he turned to leave the room and give them some privacy. Carl followed him out into the hallway and closed the door.
“I hope like hell your boy can talk some sense into mine,” Carl said, clearly exasperated. “Cade’s a handful on a good day, but you get him in a pissy mood? Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. I’m too old for this shit.”
Bryan grinned. Carl didn’t look that old, but looks could be deceiving. “Yeah, well living with Mal hasn’t been sunshine and rainbows, either. He was a complete ass when he found out Cade owned the farm, but after what Cade did with Dwight, Mal had time to re-think things. I tried to get him to call Cade and make amends, but by that time, Cade had shut down. Let’s hope the face-to-face reminds them of why they fell in love in the first place.”
The two men swapped stories of the last few months while they waited. After about thirty minutes, Roarke Fowler, the guitarist for the band, came down the hallway whistling. When he stopped in front of them, he introduced himself to Bryan. The man was larger than life and just as loud. “Are they duking it out in there or fucking like bunnies?” he asked, thumbing at the closed door.
“We’ve not heard any yelling or loud noises, so hopefully they’re discussing things like adults,” Carl said.
“Where’s the fucking fun in that?” Roarke didn’t bother knocking before he slung open the door to the dressing room. As soon as he was inside, he shouted, “Whoowee, let me get my camera!”
Bryan looked at Carl and they both went to the door and looked in. Cade was on his knees in front of a shirtless Mal. At first, Bryan thought they’d walked in on a blowjob, but when Cade stood, he pulled Mal to his side. Grinning at Roarke, Cade said, “Shut up, you sick fucker, and get over here and meet my fiancé.”
“Fiancé? I thought… Never mind. Roarke Fowler,” he introduced himself to Mal.
Shaking his outstretched hand, he responded, “Mal Wilson. Pleasure.”
Roarke was bouncing on his toes. “I just came to tell you we’re all headed out to the hotel. Your buddy Bryan’s waiting with Carl for you two to come up for air.”
“Thanks. Please tell them we’ll be right there.”
Carl and Bryan stepped out of the doorway as Roarke stalked toward them. “You got it.” When Roarke got to the door, he stopped and twisted back toward Cade. “How cute… matching tattoos.” Laughing like a maniac, the man ran out the door past Bryan and Carl. When he got to the end of the hallway, he turned back. “They’re all yours.”
Carl led Bryan farther down the hallway to wait. “Don’t want him to think we’ve been eavesdropping,” Carl said with a wink, even though that’s exactly what they’d been doing.
A few minutes later, Cade and Mal emerged from the room hand in hand. Bryan breathed a huge sigh of relief for more than one reason. Cade asked Bryan, “You want a room at the hotel?”
No way in hell. “Nah, I better get back home to Andy. He’s been feeling kinda sick,” Bryan said. Mal gave him an odd look, because he’d seen Andy feeling just fine when they left.
Mal handed Bryan the keys to the truck. “Here you go. I’ll catch a ride back with Cade tomorrow.”
Bryan looked between the two of them and asked, “We’re all good now?”
“Yeah, we’re all good,” Cade assured him. He put his hand on Bryan’s shoulder and squeezed. “Thank you for watching over my man while
I’m gone.”
Bryan smiled and said, “It’s my pleasure.” Looking around, he asked Carl, “How do I get out of here?” After Carl directed him to the nearest door, Bryan said his goodnights and quickly made his way to the exit. He waited until he was in Mal’s big truck to text Andy.
Cade and Mal made up. On my way home.
Alone.
He put the key in the ignition and fired up the engine. He waited before leaving the parking lot for Andy to text him back.
Be careful, but hurry.
Bryan planned to do both. As he headed toward the interstate, his nerves began taking over. Normally, his panic attacks were brought on by loud noises, but he’d had enough of them to recognize the signs. He rolled down the window, hoping the fresh air would do him some good. Bryan didn’t want to have to pull over to the shoulder and get out. Turning the radio down helped some. He continued driving north as he did his best to get his breathing under control. Bryan had no idea why he was reacting this way. Andy loved him, and he loved Andy. They’d already been intimate. He’d sucked Andy’s cock and swallowed his come, for Christ’s sake. He let his mind remember what Brett told him – yes, his baby brother had gone there – this wasn’t just anal with a random hookup. This was making love between two people who loved each other. There was nothing more special than offering your body up to the other person.
When he let that mantra run through his head, he calmed down. He knew this was special, and after tonight, neither one of them would be the same. Bryan could do this. He would feel better being the one on top for his first time, but he couldn’t ask that of Andy. Not after what had been done to him all those years ago. Bryan wanted Andy to talk to someone about that day as well as what happened afterward with his family. PTSD wasn’t just for men and women in the military. Andy admitted his nightmares were more often about Patrick’s abuse and rape than what Andy had seen overseas. Bryan had kept his mouth shut before when they were only friends. Once the made love, they would truly be bound to one another, and Bryan would make sure Andy did whatever it took to become whole again.