by Maia Starr
“What?” Jenna Mae couldn’t help herself. This wasn’t possible. This wasn’t true.
None of the friends that she and James’s used to go out with in the early days were at the funeral. None of the colleagues that she had met were here. None of the people who would show up to take him on business trips were here.
She froze.
The business trips that James had taken were pretty regular. She knew that he was important in the company he worked for, although he wasn’t very good at his job. She would have thought that so many business trips would have paid better.
There were no business trips at all, she realized. He had lied to her about everything.
“I miss him more than anything,” Joan said. “I can’t believe that he is gone. We’ve been together for ten years and…”
Jenna Mae felt her heart sink. Ten years? How could they have been together for ten years? How could she have never seen this woman before?
Jenna Mae had thought that she had been angry before. Nothing compared with this. He had played her and literally just kept her around to hurt her.
She felt tears well up in her eyes and sank onto the nearest seat.
“Are you alright, dear?” an old woman asked her, softly. “I know; it’s terribly sad.”
“You don’t...understand…” Jenna Mae sobbed.
“It’s ok,” the old woman said. “There, there. You’re a mother, dear; you have to be strong for your baby.”
“My baby…” Jenna Mae said. “My baby…”
“Where’s his father?” the woman realized that Jenna Mae was becoming more and more distraught.
“Gone,” Jenna Mae said. “Gone.”
“Oh, you poor dear,” the woman said. “No wonder you are so upset. I’d be upset too if I had to come to such a sad funeral alone. How did you know James?”
Jenna Mae couldn’t even answer that, shaking her head. The woman put her arm around her, pulling her close.
At the front of the church, the priest continued after Joan sat down.
“Please stand. James Lupe is now safe. He is already on his way to heaven to enjoy all which awaits there. Let us say this final farewell to his body as we commit James Lupe's physical form to its natural end.”
“Heaven?” Jenna Mae blurted out. “He’s not on his way to heaven!”
Everyone turned to look at her, and the woman gave her a little squeeze.
“James Lupe, we bless you and thank you for being a part of our lives. We honor your life on Earth, and we pray for your peace ever-after. We will not forget you. Go well into the kingdom of heaven.”
“No!” Jenna Mae finally found the courage to say what she wanted to say. “You don’t understand. You don't understand what a—”
The woman yanked her down, and the priest tried to continue like nothing had happened, despite the fact that everyone was now staring at Jenna Mae.
“We have been remembering with love and gratitude a life that touched us all. I encourage you to help, support, and love those who grieve most. Allow them to cry, to hurt, to smile, and to remember. Grief works through our systems in its own time. Remember to bless each day and to live it to the full in honor of life itself, and of James Lupe. We often take life for granted, and yet it is the greatest gift God gave us.”
“No!” Jenna Mae had enough. She threw herself to the front of the church, trying to get to the microphone. She needed them to know what he did to her. “Listen to me. Listen to me. Most of you have never seen me before; isn’t that right? I mean, why would you? I only lived with James for two years. I’ve only had his child. Why would you know who I was? Why would anyone—”
“You’re a liar.” Joan stood up from the front, her face tear streaked. “You’re a liar!”
“Am I?” Jenna Mae asked, holding Cameron so the crowd could see him. “Look at my boy. Look how he looks exactly like his…”
“Jenna Mae!” Jean-Paul was suddenly beside her out of nowhere. “Jenna Mae, come with me.”
“What? No,” she tried to protest, but she was no match for him. He began to drag her out of the church as everyone stared. “What are you doing here? Let me go! Let me go!”
“We have to go!” he hissed in her ear. “We have to go, or you’ll put yourself in more danger.”
“Danger?” Jenna Mae asked. “Danger was what James put me in! He’s gone, Jean-Paul. I’m safe now.”
“Yes!” Jean-Paul stopped cold. He didn’t care who was looking at them. “You’re safe now. With me. You’re both safe.”
Jenna Mae felt all the air go out of her when he said those words.
He was right; she was safe.
What was she doing here? Why did she come? This wasn’t where she belonged. She had worked so hard to escape and now she had walked right back into it.
“I know,” she said, softly, her legs going weak. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
Tears poured down her face, and she let Jean-Paul lead her away. As they walked out of the church, she heard the priest finish the blessing.
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious unto you. The Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace. So then, go in peace, and the God of all peace go with you.”
Jenna Mae did not need to look back because, at last, she was going in peace. She never needed to see James, or his family, or anything that tied him to earthly memory again. Except for Cameron, who had his father’s eyes. She just hoped that he didn’t have his father’s spirit too.
“I’m sorry,” she apologized again to Jean-Paul outside the church. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“I do,” he said. “You wanted to closure. You wanted not to be a secret any longer. You wanted to be heard, Jenna Mae. And I hear you.”
“They must think I’m crazy.”
“I think, if any of them have any sense,” he said, gently, “they will realize that the person they mourn is not quite the person lying in that coffin. He didn’t deserve that great funeral. I should have buried him in the woods and let everyone forget him.”
“It’s done now,” Jenna Mae said. “And I don’t want to talk about him again.”
“Well…” Jean-Paul said. “Then perhaps you’d like to talk about us.”
There was a tone in his voice that struck fear into her heart.
“What is it?” she asked him.
“It’s Remy,” Jean-Paul said. “He has officially challenged my rule, on the basis that I’ve broken the sacred laws, being with you.”
Jenna Mae met his eyes.
“But we haven’t been together,” she said. “I left you.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Jean-Paul said. “You are mine, and we did what we did.”
“I don’t want to be the reason that you are not…”
“Jenna Mae,” he put a hand to her face gently. “There will never be anyone else for me. And whether or not we are ever together again doesn’t matter. You will always be mine.”
She couldn’t resist him. The time away from each other had been too much for her. It had taken this time away to realize exactly what she wanted, and she wanted him. She had done what she needed to do, and now she needed to be with him.
“Yes,” she decided, still shaking. “Please, take me home.”
Chapter Twelve
His city home was nothing like the small cabin in the woods. It was large, and there were windows from floor to ceiling. It seemed like the biggest mansion that she had ever seen. She wasn’t even sure places like that were real. She thought that they only existed in storybooks and beautiful paintings.
“Is this...all yours?” she asked, as he let her in the front door. “Like...yours because you own it?”
“What did you expect?” he asked her with a grin. “That I just burst into a random mansion?”
“Wait, did you?” she asked, and he laughed.
“You have such little faith in me,” he said.
“No, it’s
just things in my life have been...strange,” she said, and he turned serious.
“I can understand that,” he said. “I’m sorry I kept you cooped up in that cabin in the woods so long. I should have brought you here. Maybe things would have turned out differently.”
“I don’t…” she took a deep breath. “I’m not sure I would want them too.”
“What?” he asked, confused by her wording.
“I know that I'm free now,” she said. “From all that tyranny. And I know that there is going to be a bumpy road ahead. But when I saw you walk into that funeral...I didn’t feel scared anymore. I felt...hope. For the first time in a long time.”
He wanted to kiss her then and there, but he resisted. Instead, he left his coat at the door as she put Cameron on the floor, letting him explore the new space. Jean-Paul watched Cameron with a smile.
“To have the wonderment of a child again,” he said. “That would be something I would wish for.”
“Always sleeping, eating, and putting random things in your mouth?” Jenna Mae asked, and Jean-Paul laughed.
“Do you want a tour of the house? Since you’re going to be staying here?”
“Is that...ok?” she asked. “That I’m going to be staying here? I mean, I know what happened last time we tried to stay together...it’s just that I don’t have anywhere else to go.”
“Even if we bicker,” Jean-Paul said. “This house is more than big enough to accommodate all of that. I won’t even hear you unless you yell for me from your bedroom to mine.”
“Separate bedrooms?” she asked, just out of curiosity. He cleared his throat.
“I thought it was...best...for the time being. I did prepare a nursery for Cameron though. I had hoped you’d come home with me after I went to get you.”
“How did you know I was even there?” she asked.
“The bears may be questioning my rule,” he replied. “But I still have people who are loyal to me.”
“What is going to happen with all of that?” she asked. “The bears can’t just...toss you out, can they?”
“Well, that’s the thing, Jenna Mae,” he said, turning around to face her. “By our law, I have broken every rule that my kingdom has set out. There isn’t a clan leader who isn’t whispering about me.”
“But you told me that this—Remy, he wanted to take you down all along.”
“He did,” Jean-Paul said. “But he had no case. Until now.”
“I feel so bad,” she said, putting her hands to her face. “This is all my fault.”
“No, my love,” he said, quietly. “This is not your fault. This is what nature intended. This is what the universe fated for us.”
“For you to give up your whole life to raise another man’s child?” she asked. “For you to be dishonorably discharged so that you could…”
“I would do all those things and more if it meant I could be with you,” he said, looking into her eyes. She felt like the world was quaking underneath her.
“Oh my God, you’re serious, aren’t you?” she said as tears fell down her face. “I’m not worth that, Jean-Paul.”
“My dear, of course you are,” he said, taking a step closer. “You are worth all of that and more. The reason you think you are not is because James put vile and disgusting things into your head. He told you things that were so untrue that the wordsmiths rolled over in their grave. You are worth everything to me.”
“Why are you being so nice to me?” she asked. “Why are you so kind?”
“Because I love you,” he said, plainly. “This is what love looks like this. This is what purity looks like. I want to spend my life by your side, and the rest doesn’t matter.”
She collapsed into his arms, crying. He held her gently, stroking her hair and bringing her as close as he could.
Beside them, Cameron continued to play on floor, babbling and laughing to himself. Jean-Paul glanced over Jenna Mae’s head to the happy child.
“He loves it here,” Jean-Paul said to Jenna Mae, eventually. “You can’t leave, because he’s happy here.”
“Yes, that’s exactly why I can’t leave,” she teased him, pulling back and wiping her face. “Not because I’m in love with you.”
He had waited so long to hear those words, and they were like music to his heart. He kissed her gently, and she lay her head on his shoulder.
“Now, shall we get on with that tour?” he asked. Jenna Mae was eager to agree and bent down to scoop up Cameron.
The mansion had so many rooms that Jean-Paul himself seemed to lose track of them. They walked from room to room, and the only one that seemed designated was the nursery he had designed.
“Was this your house?” she asked him. “I mean, you bought it when you became Alpha?”
“My brother, actually,” he said. “Bought it when he became Alpha.”
“So...could it be taken away?” she asked. “If they decide that they...won’t let you be Alpha anymore?”
“No,” he said. “This was Michael’s home, and now it’s mine. It was not tied to the crown in any way. If you decide to stay with me, this will be our home as long as we want it.”
“It’s dazzling,” she said. “I’m just afraid that I’ll lose my phone every day.”
He laughed, remembering how wonderful she could be with every word.
That night, when Cameron was in bed and they were in front of a roaring fire, Jean-Paul told her more of what would happen.
“I will stand trial,” he said. “In front of all the nobles: the clansbears who rule each of the clans. They will determine whether I have broken the rules and whether Remy’s claim to the throne is, therefore, more valid than mine. He is the next in line, but even if he wasn’t, he challenged me, and so all his merits will be laid out for assessments.”
“Do you have to...fight or something?” she asked. “I’ll be so worried about you.”
“I wanted to accept his challenge and face him, yes,” Jean-Paul said. “But I have always ruled by justice, and so I will leave it up to the clans bears to decide. Whatever they see fit will be the final choice.”
“But you didn’t even do anything wrong,” she protested. “If this fated mate thing is as serious as you say...surely they can’t fault you for that?”
“They will decide what is best,” Jean-Paul said. “And one of my oaths as Alpha was always to give them a voice.”
“Well, I think you’re the best Alpha I know,” she said, and he gave her a weary smile.
“How many do you know?”
“At this point, two,” she said. “And one of them had a terrible track record.”
He leaned in to kiss her as the fire crackled and she felt the familiar tingles go up and down her spine.
In the romance novels she used to read, they always talked about making love in front of a roaring fire. At this moment, with Jean-Paul close, Jenna Mae wanted nothing more than the fantasy to come true.
She kissed him back with passion, angling her body so that she could climb into his lap. He was so muscled, so solid and so strong beneath her, and she knew she would soon be putty in his hands.
He tangled his hands in her hair, pulling her close and feeling her heat grow as they continued to kiss.
“I missed this,” she said to him as they talked around each other’s tongues. “I missed this so much.”
“I dreamed of this, every night that you were away,” he said to her. “I dreamed of running my hands up and down your body and giving you so much pleasure.”
“I want you to get right inside me,” she said. “I don’t want to wait. Will you get inside me?”
“Mmm,” he said. He didn’t think that his cock could get any stiffer, but when she said that, she made him harder than he thought he had ever been. He shifted her off of his lap and undid his pants, springing his massive cock free. “Lie back.”
She complied with his instructions, lying back and closing her eyes. She wanted to feel his arms all over her body, sending her se
nses into overdrive.
“Oh God,” she said, as he touched her. “I don’t think I can wait any longer.”
“I want you to beg for it,” he said. “I want you to beg and cry out for me, and then I will get inside you.”
“Oh no,” Jenna Mae’s eyes flew open. She reached out to his cock, closing her hand around it. “You are going to suffer if I am.”
“I wouldn’t exactly call it suffering,” he groaned as she began to jerk him off. He inserted his fingers inside of her, and both of them began to moan as each other’s fingers brought them closer to climax. “Oh, God.”
“How does that feel?” she asked him. “Does it feel good?”
“Oh God,” his thighs quivered as he fought to stay upright. He thrust into her in the same rhythm that she was pulling at his cock, and it felt absolutely euphoric. “Don’t stop that.”
“How much can you take?” she asked as she picked up her pace. “Does that feel good?”
“So good,” he said. “I don’t think...Jenna Mae, I need to be inside you or I’m going to cum. I want to cum inside you.”
“Here,” she moved her legs apart, and he could see that she was dripping wet. He only took half a second to get inside of her. His thrusting had made her pussy lips contract, and once his cock filled her, she began to moan even louder.
“Oh God,” he said, feeling her pussy contract around him. “Don’t squeeze. I want to last. I want to…”
“Don’t squeeze?” she teased him and did just that. “Aren’t you supposed to be able a strong shifter? You should be able to take that.”
“I can’t take you,” he answered. “Anyone else, I could hold out, but you send me into ecstasy every time. Oh, God.”
“Cum in me,” she said, rolling her hips upwards. “Cum in me.”
“I’m going to...just a little more,” he said. “Just a little more. Oh God, oh God, oh God,” he exploded inside of her, pushing her deeper against the couch.
Jenna Mae groaned and then shuddered, cumming as well. They were always so well matched sexually, and this time was no exception. Every time she slept with Jean-Paul, it was the best sex of her life.