Unfavorables

by JM Butcher

  He doesn’t answer. He just paces the room. As soon as the bookshelf is in reach, he angrily knocks several books to the floor. He’s not as composed as I thought.

  Approaching me, Hayden puts his hands on my shoulders and stares into my eyes. His glass eye even seems to have life. That’s how potent the stare is.

  “Listen, Maggie,” he says. “You need to prepare to leave. We need to leave. I want you to leave with me.”

  “What, why?” I shift away from the awkwardly somber embrace, though the thought of him wanting me to leave with him warms my heart.

  “Don’t you see?” he says and realizes I don’t. “First, the attack was roughly twenty miles from here. Authorities will find us sooner or later. Second, the residents didn’t bomb the place. The government did to contain the uprising. And who do you think that other person at large is?”

  I gaze upward, trying to find the answer to his question on the ceiling. Then, it hits me. My gasp lets Hayden know that I’ve solved the puzzle.

  “Yes,” Hayden says. “It’s you. Your hacked chip. I mean, they don’t know you. But the hacked chip is what they’re looking for. It’s only a matter of time. We need to leave. Please, let’s go?”

  “Yes,” I stutter out of shock. “Okay. Do you want me to say anything to anyone?”

  “Umm,” Hayden thinks. “Don’t say anything. But don’t act weird. Just stay in your room. Nobody will think anything of it.”

  I ask a question that has been burning through my skull. “Is Makayla a part of this too?”

  “No, I don’t think so. She just follows orders. Play it cool around her. Wait until I’m back and we’ll fill her in. She’s one of the good guys. Just don’t alarm her.”

  I’m not entirely certain that she’s one of the good guys. If Jack’s been playing Hayden, Makayla surely could be, too. But what do I know? I’ll take his advice for now.

  While Hayden throws some stuff in a backpack, I ask, “Where are you going?”

  “Don’t worry, Maggie,” he says. “I’ll be back soon. Tonight at the latest. I’m going to check out the scene to see if there are survivors. It won’t take long.” I open my mouth to protest, but he continues, “You didn’t want people to get hurt. Well, I’m going to make sure no one else gets hurt.”

  I can’t argue with that. “Okay, but hurry,” I say.

  “I will be back soon. Be ready to leave. We’ll be fine.” His voice sounds like he’s convinced that things will be okay, and I believe him.

  “See you soon, Maggie.”

  “Come back safe, Hayden.”

  Hayden kisses me. “I will. Then we leave. Together.” He smiles and walks out.

  Before leaving, I go to turn the TV off, but something stops me. The footage shows a Gray Coat cuffing Billy. A couple of other Coats then escort him to a vehicle. Words crawl across the bottom of the screen: WILLIAM CONROY’S PUBLIC EXECUTION SCHEDULED FOR TOMORROW.

  It’s not the execution announcement that frightens me. It’s not even the fact that he got caught. I knew, everyone knew, that Billy was a liability. It was either his eye or go on another mission and get caught. He chose to go out like a hero. Or did he?

  He doesn’t walk with his head high like a hero would. Rather, he leans to his side, and it’s like he’s being dragged. His head is tilted to the side and twitches as if he’s been electrocuted. But it’s only his head.

  His eyes. His eyes look completely blank. They wander around in the sockets but aren’t looking at or for anything. His eyes bob in reaction to every twitch. That’s not Billy. That’s not someone who believes himself to be a martyr. Who believes himself to have done good for the cause. Who believes in the rebel movement. This person is a nobody. He’s braindead. He’s been deleted.

  The footage playing was shot right after Billy had been arrested. There’s no way the Coats deleted him there. Not with all the cameras. At the very least, it would’ve been reported. Deletion couldn’t happen just like that.

  Plus, the Coats would interrogate him before wiping his chip.

  That means one thing. Billy’s chip wasn’t removed here; Billy was deleted here. He’s the scapegoat for this run. Billy was deleted and offered to the authorities. A braindead person can’t talk. What did Makayla say at the Garbage Spot? A secret silenced is a secret safe.

  I wonder what secrets have been silenced. There have to be records of his night thoughts somewhere, and I’m going to find them.

  Chapter 19

  This is J.A.K. coming to you. All U-F’s and sympathizers, tune to the feed.

  Feed 12:

  We got some trouble brewing. I am on my way to the C-Bus base.

  All YRL report. G-Spot. Three hours before normal time.

  J.A.K. out.

  Anonymous, 15 October, 2040

  Fortunately, it’s lunchtime, so I know exactly where to go to find the person I’m looking for. It won’t look as shady if I approach her in a crowded room.

  Most of the people already moved on from the earlier celebration because hardly anyone acknowledges me when I walk into the room. A few waves here and there, but nothing that will create a spectacle.

  This is a good thing. I have to be as careful as possible. It’s impossible not to draw some attention, but the less I get, the better.

  It doesn’t take me long to find her. It’s not the purple hair that stands out to me; it’s her glare of disgust that brings her into focus. I sense her eyes penetrating every fiber of my being. Gia’s trying to unravel me from the inside out. It might work if I wasn’t the one hunting her down.

  Gia’s raised eyebrows suggest that my presence at her table is unexpected. “Hey, ’burb girl, what ya doing at my table? Ya already got one of us. Who’s the next target?”

  Gia’s devastated that Billy’s gone, and she blames me. It’s understandable she feels that way.

  I have to explain myself, but I can’t do it here. Not with her only friend at the table, too. “Gia, could we go somewhere to talk?”

  “Did ya hear that, Toni?” She slaps her friend’s shoulder as if I told a not-so-funny joke. “Hotshot here wants to add two more to her kill list.”

  I lean over the table. “Seriously, Gia. Can we talk?” I tilt my head at her friend. “Alone?”

  “No, as a matter of fact. We can’t,” Gia adamantly replies.

  Toni gets up from her seat and grabs her tray. “Nah, Gia, y’all have some issues to figure out. We’ll hook up later. See ya, hotshot.” My nickname has caught on.

  When Toni’s out of earshot, Gia says, “Damn it, Maggie, I was finally thinking that ya may be alright. Then ya go and pull this crap. All those kids are dead. Did ya even think about how Washburn would react? I know the bomb wasn’t your idea, but still.”

  Leaning closer to Gia, I whisper, “That’s the thing. I had nothing to do with any of this.” I scan the cafeteria and spot Makayla’s back across the room. “I know you hate me, but I need your help. I can’t explain it here. You’re the only one who can help me.” I straighten back up in my seat so as not to appear suspicious.

  Just then, someone bumps into me. It’s the Suit. His bruise is nearly gone.

  “Why’d you do it?” he says. “Why’d you turn into a killer? You act like you care, and then you go kill the ones you act like you want to protect. More Unfavorables. Hypocrite.”

  “You pull the trigger with your own hands,” I reply.

  The Suit startles me by slamming his hand on the table. He mutters through clenched teeth. “And I’m sorry for it. It will haunt me forever. But you, you’re here celebrating like you’re the cat’s ass. I got to live with my sins. Now, you got to, too.”

  As he gets ready to leave, I grab his arm and whisper, “I swear I didn’t do this.” I immediately regret admitting this. His one eyelid closes halfway in confusion. Like he actually believes me. Then, he’s gone.

  “What did ya say to Leon?” Gia asks.

  Leon’s his name. “The same thing I told you,” I answer.
“Will you help me?”

  “Help with what?” Gia’s flustered or uninterested. I can’t figure out which.

  I turn around to search for Makayla. Her back is still to me. “Getting Billy’s records. I need to see his night thoughts.”

  Finally, I’ve gotten Gia’s attention. She remains silent and scans the room herself. A little nod from her tells me all I need to know.

  “Jack’s office,” I say. “I know you have a key. Meet me in one hour.”

  Gia nods again.

  ***

  In Jack’s office, I offer Gia my explanation of the recent events. Her single raised eyebrow communicates an “Oh, please” reaction. If only she had glasses on, she could lower them on her nose and put on the aggravated teacher look.

  I understand Gia’s skepticism. If she bought into everything I told her right away, she wouldn’t be Gia. Although she might not believe me at all, at least the story intrigues her enough to entertain the chance that it’s true.

  “So I assumed you had a key, but why do you have Jack’s computer password?” I ask.

  “If I’m gonna help ya with this, ya best call him Johnny,” she snaps back.

  I’ve had the upper hand on her since I’ve been here. Now, I’m at her mercy. “Sorry.” I try to sound sincere. “Why do you have Johnny’s password?”

  “Because he trusts me a lot more than y’all think,” she says with a big grin, finally getting the chance to display her superiority. “Shouldn’t we turn off the lights if we want to be sneaky?”

  “No,” I quickly respond.

  If we’re in the dark, my chip starts to record. The risk that my thoughts are being monitored is much greater than someone passing by Jack’s office and noticing a light is on.

  Gia nods, needing no explanation. “What do ya want me to look up anyway?”

  “You’re a Hound. You can access Billy’s night thoughts, right?” I ask.

  Gia types rapidly, only stopping to use the touch screen function to flip through windows. “Yeah, but what’s this gonna do?” she asks. “Wouldn’t it be better to look through your memory?”

  “No, mine won’t tell the truth. It’s been altered,” I answer, hovering over her left shoulder. “If I’m right about Billy, maybe there will be some clues. Maybe some hints about if he knew something or was scared of someone.”

  “You mean scared of Johnny,” Gia says.

  “Someone set me up,” I respond.

  Gia stops swiping and typing. She catches my chin with her head as she swings back to face me. At first, I think she did it on purpose, but she puts her hand on the spot that suffered as much damage as my chin did.

  “Listen, you brat! I’m only doing this to prove to ya that Johnny did nothing. I’m doing this to find out where he’s been. I promise he wouldn’t hurt those kids.”

  Using a soft voice so as not to annoy her further, I say, “He was okay with killing those people at the Mills office.” My strategy fails; her cheeks flush, almost matching her hair.

  “That was different. They weren’t innocent. They weren’t kids. Johnny wouldn’t hurt the kids. He protects Unfavorables. Unfavorables like you.”

  Gia’s said a lot of mean things to me, but this one hurts. Nobody here uses that word as a slur here, and I’ve gotten used to that. She avoids eye contact when I tear up. It makes me feel a little bit better that she might be experiencing some guilt.

  For her to say something so hurtful, she must really put all of her faith in Jack, and she’s afraid he might fail her. I worry how she’ll react when she discovers that Jack isn’t who she thinks he is.

  “I’m sorry,” she says and resumes her work on the computer. “I didn’t mean…”

  I interrupt, “It’s fine.”

  We both remain silent as Gia sorts through files. When a hologram of Billy’s face appears, she asks, “Where do ya wanna start?”

  The sheer volume of his records overwhelms me as she flips through windows and windows of data. We can’t possibly browse through his entire chip’s memory. Where should we start?

  “Umm,” I mumble. “Can I try?”

  “Be my guest,” Gia answers and moves out of the way.

  I have no idea what I’m looking for. I don’t even know how to work the computer. Dad wouldn’t buy us such a high-tech device, no matter how much Tyler and I begged.

  Sifting through Billy’s night thoughts, I read some interestingly useless things about Billy. He wants ranch dressing to be called a dairy-dill smoothie. If he won the lottery, he’d apparently buy a plot of land on Mars for when the sun swallows Mercury and gets hotter. And he wasn’t lying about framing Danny Johnson for cheating. There are at least twenty different plans here.

  As entertaining as this is, I’m getting nowhere. And I feel bad for violating Billy’s privacy—even if he’ll never know. If he’s been deleted, these aren’t even his thoughts anymore.

  That’s it!

  I ask, “Hey, has this data been downloaded or are you literally accessing his chip at this moment?”

  “This is from our system,” Gia responds. “Ya can see these have synthesized into narratives. Why does that matter?”

  I perk up. “Listen, if Billy’s been deleted, his chip would’ve been wiped, right?”

  “I guess, yeah,” she answers.

  “Can you directly access his chip?”

  “No,” Gia shrugs. “Johnny has to give his approval for that. We just get whatever is downloaded. But it’s all here. Every thought. I can get out of narrative mode if you want. Would that help?”

  “No,” I say, “it’s easier to follow this way.”

  Ugh, what am I even looking for? I smack the side of my head in an attempt to spark an idea. We could read what he’s thinking now, but chances are the Coats have disabled his chip. Or ripped it out. It’s worth a shot.

  I stand up and signal for Gia to take back over the reins. “Can you see if there’s any incoming data now?”

  “Sure,” she says. Gia swipes and clicks. She looks frustrated. “Nope. Nothing. The Coats probably disabled it.”

  “Or,” I excitedly spit out, “Ja…someone here might’ve disabled it.” I can tell Gia isn’t happy that I almost slipped in Jack’s name, but I’m proud of my suggestion. “Go to last night. If Billy was a part of this last run, he surely would’ve gone over it in his head last night.”

  Gia gasps and leans in closer to the screen to confirm something. “He went offline at 2:37 a.m.”

  “That’s more than four hours before the JUH kids rioted. That means…” I don’t need to finish my thought. I’ve convinced Gia that Billy’s chip was cleared. The downloaded data is all that is left of Billy’s mind.

  How could he take part in the JUH run if he was already deleted? Simple answer: He couldn’t have. Did he know this was going to happen? If so, there’s a chance Jack’s name would appear in Billy’s final night thoughts.

  I begin to flip the data backwards in time to a point when Billy’s chip was online. My eagerness causes me to accidentally go back too far. My heart beats against my ribs as I work forward until I get to a spot that appears worth reading.

  3x + 4y = D. I can’t get another D on this test. Sydney doesn’t like dumb boys. She’ll leave me for sure. She’ll get with Danny Johnson.

  Why was she walking with him yesterday? And eating with him in the lunch hall?

  I hate Danny Johnson. Sydney knows that.

  Well, Billy wasn’t lying at school when he talked about his algebra-Sydney thoughts. I scroll ahead a day.

  How could I fail that test? I studied. I crammed. Imaginary numbers, letters that I don’t even use in writing classes. Quadratic crap.

  No college for me. Danny Johnson is good at algebra. And at writing.

  Sydney likes smart boys. I’m not smart. Only dumb people fail first-year algebra.

  Sydney likes him because he’s good at algebra.

  “What’s this crap?” Gia asks. She isn’t as interested in validating
Billy’s morning talks as I am. “Is this what you were looking for?”

  “No,” I respond. I keep moving forward. All the way to last night.

  This is it. He’ll find me here, but I wish I had one final time in the stadium.

  I wish she was here. One more time to run through the field. Those always were my favorite times. Now, she’s going to wipe me clean. That’s okay. Just wish I had one more run with her.

  I visualize Billy lying in the middle of the field—the grass and weeds hiding his body. His eyes closed, thinking about his crush. For his sake, I wish she were running the field with him too, instead of just running through his mind.

  This tells me that Makayla is involved.

  She’s only doing it because of him. He has her in his pocket. Why does she let him control her? He controls everything.

  I never should’ve trusted him. I should’ve stayed with the YRL.

  Gia’s sharp intake of breath ear tells me that she’s reading this, too. Jack. Jack and his top Hound. Jack and Makayla. I was right.

  I want to stop the search so that I can spare Gia from losing it. But then, I see my name.

  Poor Maggie. She has no idea what she’s in for. I should’ve warned her not to get involved. Nothing good can come of this.

  Why didn’t I talk to Maggie more at school? Or even here? I should’ve gotten to know her.

  Now, she’s in his hands. She’ll be cleaned soon.

  What’s he always say? A secret silenced is a secret safe.

  The famous words from Makayla. I guess she learned the phrase from Jack.

  I want to say, “Thanks, Billy. You did warn me. You’re warning me now. Thanks to you, I might have a chance. Thank you, Billy.”

  Dang. He’s already here. I thought I’d have a little more time.

  Maybe Makayla is with him. I can ask her for one more run. Just one more run. I will let her tackle me. I will finally try to kiss her. Just one more run.