Emilia stopped and looked at her friend who took something out of her valise. When Emilia saw that the small object was the blue diamond ring, she hurried over to her. “You brought this thing to a foxhunting estate?”
“I brought it along in the event you gained your senses and realized you want to spend the rest of your life with your husband.”
“But I thought you wanted to keep it.”
“I took it so you wouldn’t do something foolish like return it to the jeweler. It’s an exquisite ring. What kind of friend would I be if I let you get rid of it?”
Emilia accepted the ring and smiled. “You really are a good friend.”
“Of course, I am.”
Emilia gave her a hug. “Thank you.”
Lilly gestured to the door. “You have one hour before we go down to dinner. I order you to make the most of it.”
Emilia wasn’t sure what her friend meant, but she was so excited to get the ring back that she didn’t care. She did love the thing. It was the most beautiful piece of jewelry she’d ever seen in her entire life. And now that she had decided to stay in the same townhouse with Benjamin, it was all right for her to keep it.
She wrapped her hand around it so no one would see it and left the room. She thought about putting the ring in her room before going to see Benjamin, but it turned out he was walking in the hall.
She hurried after him and, mindful not to let anyone else know her true identity, she used her masculine voice to say, “Oh good, you’re here.”
Benjamin glanced over his shoulder. “I need to wash up and change into my dinner attire.” He gestured to one of the doors further down. “After I finish up in there, I’ll be downstairs.”
Emilia laughed. “There’s no sense in waiting to talk. Besides, I have something important to tell you. I don’t want to wait. Your room is this one, correct?” She headed for the door he had motioned to.
“Well, yes,” Benjamin said, unease in his voice. “But whatever you have to say can be said anywhere. We can go back downstairs right now if the matter can’t wait. There’s no one in the drawing room.”
“Nonsense. There’s no reason why we can’t talk in here.” She opened the door to his room and stepped inside. When he didn’t follow, she urged, “Come on. I can’t do what I want with you out there. We need our privacy.”
She couldn’t be sure, but she thought his face went pale.
He glanced around the hallway. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“We could wait until after dinner, but that’s a long time from now. I’d rather we have this discussion before we eat.”
“Discussion? That means all you want to do is talk?”
She nodded. “Yes, I want to tell you something you’ve been wanting to hear for a while now.”
“There’s nothing in particular I’ve been wanting you to tell me.”
“Don’t be silly. Of course, there is.” Emilia knew for a fact that he’d been longing for the day she’d tell him she loved him. This was going to be the best moment of his life. She waved for him to go into the room.
Benjamin shifted from one foot to the other. “We’re only going to talk? That’s all?”
Why did he keep asking her this? “I suppose we can do more if you want,” she whispered, “but I really just want to talk.”
“Talking is all I want,” he hurried to reply. “I don’t want to do anything else.”
“Then we’ll just talk.”
He hesitated for a long moment then let out a resigned sigh. “All right.”
Surprised he wasn’t more enthusiastic to be alone with her, she watched in silence as he entered the room. He did love her. He’d made that abundantly clear many times. She didn’t know why he was acting so strangely. Perhaps it was because they were at a gentleman’s estate. Deciding that had to be it, she closed the door.
She turned to him. He stood by the window and glanced outside. She took a deep breath. If she was going to do this, she ought to just come out and say it.
“I love you, Benjamin,” she said in her normal voice.
His eyes grew wide, and he stumbled back, hitting the window behind him. “What?”
“I suppose I could have waited until we returned home until I said it, but I was just so overcome by everything you said out there while we were hunting for foxes that I wanted to tell you now.” Recalling the ring she was holding, she slipped it on and showed it to him. “You gave me this lovely gift. You said I could have a horse. You let me talk about anything I want. And you’ve done many other things to spoil me. I don’t think any lady is as fortunate as I am. I love you with all of my heart. I’m glad we’re married.”
He blinked several times. “Emilia?”
She laughed. “You knew it was me the whole time.”
He shook his head, still looking baffled. “No, no, I didn’t. I thought you were Duke.” He paused and squinted as he studied her. “Is it really you, Emilia?”
She stopped laughing. He really hadn’t known it was her? She’d been wrong this whole time? He really had believed she had been a gentleman? She removed her hat, the wig, and the beard to prove it was her.
He jerked in surprise.
He really hadn’t known it was her! “I thought you figured out it was me when Lilly and I arrived here.”
His eyes grew wide. “Lilly is here, too?”
“She’s Mr. Squire. I thought you knew that.”
“No, no, I didn’t know any of it. I thought you two were on your way to the country.”
“We only said that so we could come here.”
“Why?”
“Because it sounded like fun and I didn’t think there was any way you would let me come if you knew I was disguised as a duke.”
He blinked a few times as he took into account everything she was saying. “I didn’t think you would do anything like this. Roger mentioned something about inviting you along, but I didn’t think you’d be willing to do it.” He gasped. “You were at White’s!”
She shushed him. She didn’t think anyone heard him, but it was hard to tell for sure. She glanced at the door. Good. No one was coming in to see why he had spoken so loudly.
“Sorry,” he whispered. “Why were you at White’s?”
“Lilly wanted someone to go with her so she could talk to Roger. This was when he was upset with her. She wanted to know how she could make things right with him.”
“But she was pretending to be Mr. Squire.”
Emilia nodded. “She thought if he talked to a gentleman, she could find out what she could do, as his wife, to make amends. She didn’t tell him she was Lilly. She let him think he was Mr. Squire.”
“Oh. Did it work?”
“Yes, it did.” Her gaze went to the hat, wig, and beard she was holding. “Are you angry with me for coming here?”
“I could never be angry with you. I was just shocked, that’s all.” After a moment, he added, “To be honest, I’m relieved. I had no idea what a gentleman wanted to do with me in this room.” He put his hand over his heart. “You gave me quite a fright.”
She put the things she was holding on a nearby table then went over to hug him.
He glanced at the window and moved her away from it. “Give me a moment.” He pulled the drapes closed and breathed a sigh of relief. “I don’t want anyone to know you’re here.”
“That’s why I thought you kept talking to me as if I was the duke while we were in front of the others,” she said. “I thought you wished to keep my identity a secret.”
“I do wish to do that. But I really didn’t think it was you. I thought you were a peculiar gentleman.”
“What made me peculiar?”
“Well, you had a title, but you talked as if your father was still alive.”
“But I thought you knew it was me when I did that,” she said. “You know my father’s alive.”
“If you were a gentleman with a title, your father would not be alive. When I think about it, I
suppose that should have told me you might not be who you claimed to be.”
As he made sure the drapes were secure, she was overcome by a horrible thought. “So when you told me I could have a horse and that I could talk about anything I wanted, even if it was a topic that ladies aren’t encouraged to discuss, you weren’t really telling me that.”
He turned to her. “I’ll be more than happy to get you a horse, and I’ll discuss whatever you want.”
What a relief! Lilly was right about him. He would do anything for her.
She put her arms around him and hugged him again. “I’m glad you’re my husband, Benjamin.”
He put his arms around her. “I’m glad you’re here. I missed you. I was going to ask Roger if he’d take me to Lilly’s sister’s estate. Now I don’t have to do that.”
She looked up at him. “You missed me that much?”
“How could I not? You’re the best thing in my life.”
Pleased by his words, she stood on her tiptoes so she could kiss him. It was hard to believe they’d only shared their first kiss that morning. So much had happened since then that it almost seemed like it’d happened days ago.
She had enjoyed the other kiss, and she was enjoying this one, too. Actually, she was enjoying this one more. Now that she knew the fluttering of her heart was nothing to worry about, she could give herself completely to the thrill of being wrapped up in his arms and kissing him.
Letting out a contented sigh, she urged him to keep kissing her. He seemed more than willing to comply, for he made no move to stop. Sparks shot straight through her. This was so much better than she’d thought kissing would ever be, and that included how she had imagined kissing even the gentlemen she had fancied before she even met Benjamin. She doubted she could have ever enjoyed kissing anyone else the way she enjoyed kissing him, though. He was, by far, the best of them all.
He pulled away from her, and just as she was about to protest, he said, “I can’t keep going. I want to keep kissing you. Really, I do. It’s just that I only have so much self-control. If we keep going, I won’t be able to stop.”
“Stop what?”
“Stop kissing and holding you.”
“Why would you want to stop? I was enjoying it. Weren’t you?”
A blush crept up his cheeks. “Yes, but I’m enjoying it too much.”
How was it possible to enjoy something too much? And why would admitting he wanted to keep kissing and holding her make his face grow red? It wasn’t like they were in front of other people. Had they been kissing outside during the foxhunt, she would have understood his embarrassment, but there was nothing to be embarrassed about when they were alone.
He cleared his throat. “I assume you want to wait until we’re home before we share a bed.” He cleared his throat again. “Other husbands might be able to show more restraint while doing all this kissing, but I don’t think I can.”
She glanced at the bed and then at him. Then she thought over what her mother had told her to expect on her wedding night, a wedding night that Benjamin, thankfully, had been willing to wait for since she hadn’t been ready to be with him that way back then. But she was ready now.
“You don’t have to show restraint. We’re alone, and we’re married,” she said. When he didn’t reply, she took his hand and led him to the bed. “I want to be with you. I see no reason to wait.”
She thought he might protest since this was all so sudden, but when she glanced back at him, she saw that he was already unfastening the buttons of his hunting coat. She blinked in surprise. She had no idea he was that excited by the prospect of being intimate with her. Never once had he given her any indication that making love to her was so important to him.
She surmised it was because he had been determined not to rush her. On their wedding day, he was the one who suggested they wait until they knew each other better before they consummated the marriage. At the time, she’d been so relieved that she hadn’t considered he probably wanted to be with her but was willing to put aside his own desires for her sake. Everything he had done had been for her. She couldn’t think of a lady who was better loved than she was.
She gave him another kiss and, despite the sudden burst of shyness that crept over her, she started to undress. She was aware he watched her, but she removed her clothing anyway. She tried to look over at him to see how much of his clothing was off of him, but she couldn’t do it. Yes, she wanted to be in bed with him and find out why Lilly enjoyed this activity so much, but this was all new to her.
As she finished removing the last of her clothing, he pulled back the covers on the bed. Her heartbeat picking up, she climbed into the bed. Despite her nervousness, she did take a moment to appreciate how nice the bed felt. Lilly had told her Lord Browning had thought of everything when he created the rooms for his patrons, and this bed was one of the most comfortable she’d ever been on.
Benjamin got into the bed with her and pulled the covers over both of them, something he probably did to make her feel more at ease. And it worked. She didn’t feel quite as nervous now that she wasn’t so exposed to him.
He fluffed up a pillow and urged her to lift her head so he could swap the pillow she was currently using with the fluffed one.
She felt a smile tug at her lips. “We aren’t going to sleep. I don’t think it matters how the pillows are.”
“I want everything to be perfect for you,” he replied.
“It is perfect,” she assured him as he put the new pillow under her head. “That fact that you’re so good to me is what makes it perfect.”
His gaze met hers, and it occurred to her that she rather liked the way he looked. He had a noble appearance about him. She didn’t know why she hadn’t noticed that on their wedding day, but she supposed it didn’t matter. She was happy with him. They were going to spend the rest of their lives together in the same townhouse, and they were going to have children and be a happy family. And, if they had daughters, she would tell them to try to find someone like their father when it was time to enter their Seasons.
He smiled at her. “The best day of my life was when we married.”
“It was the best day of my life, too.” Even though she hadn’t realized it at the time. She knew it now, and that was good enough.
She cupped the side of his face with her hand and encouraged him to bring his mouth to hers. He did as she bid, and before long, he was kissing her in earnest. He traced the bottom of her lower lip with his tongue, and she parted her lips to let him into her mouth. Lilly hadn’t told her about the more intimate details of the bed. Her mother had seen fit to do that in order to prevent her from being frightened on her wedding night. But Lilly had described the kind of kissing that involved more than keeping one’s lips closed. At the time, Emilia had been so appalled that she wished such kissing would never happen to her. Now, however, as Benjamin’s tongue interlaced with hers, she found such kissing to be as pleasant as Lilly claimed it to be. It was so pleasant, in fact, that she became aware that she relaxed further, and, on instinct, she wiggled closer to him.
The first thing she noticed was the male part of him that poked her in the abdomen. She knew what it was, though she couldn’t bring herself to think of it as a love appendage as her mother had termed it. Her mother had thought by terming it that way, it would be easier for Emilia to accept, but Emilia had thought it the most ridiculous term she’d ever heard. Yes, it was attached to a gentleman like any appendage, but adding the word “love” to it had just seemed silly. Even now, it made her want to giggle.
But she managed to refrain. She didn’t want Benjamin to think he was doing anything funny in case he stopped making love to her. She was enjoying this much more than she had thought possible. She wanted him to keep going. Or maybe it was more of a need. There was an unfamiliar tension building up between her legs that was pushing her to do more. She would just have to push all of the silly references her mother had used out of her mind and focus on him. That way, she wouldn’
t get distracted from the way he was making her feel.
While he continued to kiss her, his hand slid up her side until it cupped her breast. The action sent an unexpected spark through her, and as he explored her, that tension between her legs grew stronger. She had no idea that someone touching her breasts could affect that part of her, but the more he explored her, the more she realized there had to be a connection between her breasts and her most private place.
The connection became even more pronounced when he brought his mouth to her breasts and spent considerable time kissing them. She most liked it when he traced her nipples with his tongue. She moaned and squeezed his shoulders, something she hadn’t planned to do. It had just happened on instinct.
When he was satisfied with his exploration of her breasts, he brought his mouth back to hers. His kisses were more ardent than before, and that thrilled her. It was wonderful to know he was caught up in the moment. He wasn’t the only one who experienced this rise in passion; she did, too. The ember that had been within her had given way to a wild fire, and her body was demanding to be satisfied.
He brought his hand between her legs, and she parted them for him, eager for what he was going to do next. He slid two fingers into her. She groaned and lifted her hips to take him deeper into her. While he stroked her with his fingers, he seemed to be searching for something with his thumb. She wondered what he was searching for until his thumb rested on a part of her that heightened her pleasure immensely.
Mindful they weren’t at home, she whispered that she needed him to keep his thumb there. He settled on that part and employed circular motions that sent her over the edge. Her orgasm came so fast she was unprepared for it. All she could do was give in to the burst of pleasure that erupted inside her. She’d never felt so wonderful in her entire life. If she had known being in bed with him would be like this, she would have insisted they do this on their wedding night. It was a shame she had denied herself this level of ecstasy. But at least, this wasn’t the last time she’d get to experience this. She and Benjamin had the rest of their lives to be together this way.
Nobody's Fool (Marriage by Design Book 2) Page 16