by Melody Adams
"Good! I like you better that way!" he replied indifferently. "Hate me as much as you want. That's better than running after me like a dog in heat!"
"Motherfucker!" I shouted after him. His words had struck me deep, but I would not do him the favor and show it. Discontentedly I followed him through the brush and I wished the bastard did not have such a damn sexy backside. Damn the fucker! I would see to it that my father punished him. He would pay for treating me like this!
Hunter
I could hear her cursing quietly behind me. I had deliberately hurt her and although I knew it was better if she hated me, I felt bad for hurting her feelings. The next few days would be quite difficult for me. I had to reject everything I felt, everything I desired. And I couldn't just turn my back on her and walk away as I would if we were somewhere safe. I had to look after her, take care of her. It was going to be pure torture. It already was. Every instinct in me cried out to pull her into my arms and take what I wanted. What I needed. But it was exactly these instincts that I had to fight with all might and means, because they put Pearl in great danger.
"My foot is hurting again!" Pearl's voice sounded behind me. "Can't we set up camp here somewhere? I can't go any further! Please!"
Sighing, I stopped without turning around to her.
"This isn’t a good spot", I said. "Just a little bit farther. I smell water. There must be a stream or a spring somewhere nearby." Slowly I turned around without looking directly at her. "I can carry you if you can't walk anymore." It would kill me to carry her without giving in to the urge of my nature, but I didn't want her to be in pain.
"Thank you, but no!" she replied flippantly. "I don't want to impose myself on you again, because my closeness seems so repugnant to you!"
"Pearl, I ..."
"No!" she me off. "You better don't say anything! I don't want to hear anything else from you. I’m able to handle a few more meters. I am tougher than you think! I hope that we will be out of here soon and that I will never have to see you again!”
I clenched my fists and ground my jaws. I wanted to reply, but I managed to swallow the words that were on my lips. She was better off with her momentary hatred instead of wanting something I couldn't give her. I should be glad that she now saw things this way. But the truth was that, deep inside, I did not want her to feel that way. What I wanted, however, was not important. It was impossible! Even if there was a chance that I would have enough control over myself not to hurt her, the danger that I would fail was just too great. It would be selfish to even try.
"Great!" I said grimly and turned around again. I tried to ignore the guilty conscience when I heard her limping behind me. I should carry her, it wasn't far now. But I didn't trust my self-control.
"Ouch," Pearl screamed softly behind me and I turned around swearing. With a few steps I was by her side and had thrown her over my shoulder. Softly cursing I stomped through the jungle. I heard her sob quietly and I felt like the biggest asshole on the planet. But what could I do? She would quickly forget about me once she was back in her privileged fairytale world. She would get over it.
"Here we are", I announced when we arrived at our camp. I lowered Pearl carefully. "Sit here and I'll prepare the camp."
Pearl sat down on an uprooted tree trunk and I began to examine the camp site for snakes and other dangers. Then I collected firewood and made a campfire. Pearl sat silently, staring at the ground in front of her. It hurt me to see her like this. I wanted to give her something better than a camp in the jungle, but right now this was the best I had to offer. For almost a week she would have to do without any comforts. Even in the captivity of the rebels she had been more comfortable.
"You stay here by the fire", I said. "I will go and get us something to eat. Do you still have the gun I gave you?"
Pearl nodded without looking at me. Her lips were turned to a pout and my first instinct was to go to her and kiss that expression from her lips until she would be soft and compliant beneath me. But that kiss would inevitably lead to other things. I would most likely lose control of myself and what the consequences of that would be if I didn't even want to imagine. With my hands clenched in fists, I turned away and disappeared into the thicket of the jungle to go hunting.
Pearl
I watched Hunter disappear into the jungle. Wondering where that attraction came from that didn't seem to let go of me, no matter how angry I was with him. I had been in love many times, but never with an intensity so intense that made me want to fall to my knees in front of him and beg for his attention. Maybe that was the secret? He was the first man to ever reject me. Despite the fact that he showed clear signs of being interested. Is that why I felt such a strong attraction to him? Because I couldn't have him? What did I even know about him? Except that he looked pretty damn hot and was an exotic mix of man and alien, I really didn't know anything about him. Not his strengths nor his weaknesses. I didn't know what he liked to do in his free time, what he liked to eat, what music he listened to. Nothing at all! I only knew that he had been sent here by my father to rescue me and that he obviously thought that I was off-limits. That in turn suggested that he had honor and a sense of duty ... and a great deal of self-control. At least he wasn't the type of guy who picked a woman simply because he had the opportunity. A good trait if only it weren't standing in the way of what I wanted.
There was a crack in the bushes and I flinched. Slowly I reached for the gun and flipped the safety off. It was almost dark now and I felt a little uncomfortable, despite the gun in my hands.
"It's just me", I heard Hunter's voice, then he stepped out of the thicket into the light of the fire. He was carrying a spear over his shoulder with some fish hanging from it. He looked at me a little entertained and I realized that I was still pointing the gun at him.
"Do you want to shoot me before or after dinner?" he asked teasingly and I slowly lowered the barrel and put the gun.
"Sorry, I thought ..."
"Do you know how to gut fish?", Hunter interrupted me and changed the subject.
"Sure!" I said confidently, even though I had never gutted a fish in my entire life.
"How many times have you done it before?" he asked and scrutinized me insistently. I blushed. A grin appeared on his full lips. "You’ve never done it before!"
"That does not mean that I can’t ...", I started to defend myself.
"I'll show you", he said. "Come here and sit down!"
He placed a few large leaves on the ground and knelt in front of them. I took a seat on the other side of the leaves.
"We don't want to attract animals with the blood and intestines, that's why we want to use the leaves. Later we will throw them into the fire with the guts. So, watch me. You grab a fish in your hand. Like I am."
He showed me where to make the cut and how to get the intestines out. I found the whole thing quite disgusting, but I was determined to prove to Hunter that I wasn't the spoiled rich girl he apparently thought I was. I picked up a fish and tried to copy him. Opening the stomach was still okay, but when I dug my fingers into the slimy intestines and guts, I had to force myself not to cringe.
I felt a little queasy, but I managed to somehow pull out the intestines, even though I needed several attempts to remove everything where Hunter had managed in one piece. Nevertheless, I was proud of myself and triumphantly presented him with my fish. He smiled at me and I got all tingly.
"Not bad," he said and offered me another fish.
After we had gutted all five fish, Hunter washed them in the stream we were camping on, and I burned the leaves with the innards. Hunter came back with the clean fish skewered on a stick and held them over the fire. For a while we sat in silence and I realized that this was the most relaxed moment since my rescue.
"What's it like on Eden?" I asked after a while.
Hunter's gaze shifted to me, then back to the campfire, where the fish were sizzling over the flames. He turned the stick a little and the smell of the fried fish made my mou
th water. I was really hungry.
"It's a little bit like here", Hunter finally answered. Warm, a lot of jungle. Not like that cold place where your father's house is."
„Oh, the White House in Washington? It's not our house, you know? All the presidents live there for the duration of their term. We used to live in Florida. It's warmer there. Not as tropical as here, though. I've heard that there are indigenous people in Eden who are cannibals?"
Hunter laughed.
"Well, the Jinggs are undoubtedly not the most likeable creatures, but I doubt they're practicing cannibalism."
"Have you ... have you seen them before?"
"Yes", he replied and turned the fish again. "I saw them a few times while hunting. They left me alone. I think they have a right to be pissed off. After all, it's their planet!"
"Yes, from their point of view that's true, of course," I agreed. "Do you think that the Alien Breeds and the ... these Ji..."
"Jinggs!"
"Yeah, right. These Jinggs, that you could live together in peace sometime?"
Hunter shrugged his shoulders.
"Maybe! I hope so, because they’re fascinating in their own way."
"What do they look like?"
"They are tall, muscular, but not built broad like the Alien Breeds. More like a runner. They are very fast and I know that they can move in the trees, like these funny animals here."
"Oh, like monkeys?"
"Yes, I guess they are. Monkeys. I have seen a few. They reminded me of the Jinggs. Although not the way they look, of course."
"So, the Jinggs look like humans?"
Hunter shook his head.
"No! Their faces are human, but they have blue skin and yellow eyes. Their skulls are bald. I don't know if it's natural or if they shave them. I have only seen the male representatives of their species so far. Hunters!"
"Blue skin and yellow eyes? That sounds awful."
I shuddered, feeling a bit uneasy.
"Well, I'm not a woman, but I would say that the warriors were quite handsome in their own exotic way. I think it's hard to imagine if you haven't seen it for yourself."
"What do you do when you're on Eden?" I changed the subject. Blue-skinned aliens with yellow eyes didn't seem a pleasant topic at night. I wondered if I would be able to sleep here in the wilderness anyway. As stupid as that sounded, I had felt more comfortable in the terrorists' camp. My tent had been pretty much in the middle of the camp and with all the armed men it seemed unlikely that any wild animal would have managed to make it to my cot. Here, on the other hand, there was only the campfire flames and Hunter standing between me and the wild nightlife of the jungle.
Hunter removed the fish from the fire and laid them on a rock between us. He tore a chunk of meat from one of the fish and put it in his mouth. I followed his lead and noticed that the fish tasted great. My stomach growled loudly as I swallowed the first bite.
"Hungry, huh?" Hunter asked amused.
I decided not to answer his rhetorical question and took another bite. We ate in silence for a while until I remembered that Hunter hadn't even answered my last question.
"So what about my last question? What do you do when you are on Eden?
Hunter didn't seem to want to answer my question. He threw me a quick glance and devoted himself to eating again. When I didn't expect it anymore, he suddenly started talking.
"I'm spend most of my time in the jungle", he said.
"Hunting?"
He shrugged his shoulders.
"Hunting. Exploring. I'd rather be outside of the settlement."
"Why? Don't you have any ... friends there?"
"I have friends!" Hunter announced grimly. "I just don't like the presence of humans very much!"
I almost dropped the chunk of fish I was going to put into my mouth with. I lowered my hand and stared at him. Was he serious about that? He hated humans? Not that I could blame him, considering what humans had done to him, but it threw a whole new light on his motives not to get close to me.
"Then why did you rescue me if you hate my race so much?" I asked bitterly. I threw the piece of fish into the fire. I had lost my appetite.
"I’ve hurt you", he said quietly. "I'm sorry about that. I didn't express myself clearly. I don't hate you, Pearl. I only hate the soldiers who think they are better than the Alien Breeds!"
I took a deep breath and finally dared to look at him. His gaze was resting on me. It was difficult for me to interpret his mood. His face always seemed nearly expressionless, even now. His gaze was intense, dark. He sent a shiver down my spine.
"Eat some more", he said roughly. "You’ll need strength for the march. We’re leaving early in the morning!"
I nodded and started to eat again. Except the fish somehow didn't taste so good anymore. Hunter was too confusing for me. It had never been so difficult for me to judge a human being.
Maybe it's because he's not a human!, interjected my inner voice.
I was facing the campfire. Hunter was lying behind me, albeit a bit further away. I was tired and exhausted, but my racing thoughts wouldn't allow me to sleep. Additionally, every sound of the nocturnal jungle frightened me and I just couldn't find a comfortable position to relax. Sighing, I turned around and stared at Hunter. His eyes were closed and he seemed to be asleep. I wondered why he didn't seem to fear any danger. What if a predator snuck up on us while we were sleeping? Shouldn't at least one of us keep watch at all times? On the other hand, he was an outdoorsy type. The jungle on Eden was certainly not any less dangerous and he must have enough experience to assess the situation. He had better instincts. Perhaps he felt when danger was looming? Nevertheless, I could not rest. I sighed softly, then I sat up resolutely. Carefully I crawled closer to Hunter and laid down next to him.
"You can't sleep?" he asked without opening his eyes.
"I ... I thought you were asleep," I replied, startled.
"I am a light sleeper", he explained. "I heard you sneaking up on me. What is it? Are you scared?"
"Yes", I admitted.
Hunter stretched out his arm and I snuggled closer to him. His arm wrapped around me and I felt much better already.
"Now sleep, Pearl."
"Thank you", I whispered and closed my eyes. It was nice to feel Hunter's warmth and even though his muscles were as hard as steel, my head was comfortable on his shoulder. Much more comfortable than on the hard ground. It didn't take long, and I had drifted off to sleep.
I awoke when Hunter began to move. I blinked and opened my eyes. It was still dark. Why did Hunter wake up? Had he heard something? My heart began to beat faster.
"Good morning, Pearl."
"Morning? It is still dark out", I objected.
"It will soon be light. I want us ready to march as soon as the sun rises. Come on! Get up!"
Hunter's commanding tone destroyed the beautiful feeling I had while lying in his arms. Still sleepy and a bit stiff, I released myself from his embrace and stood up. He jumped on his feet so fast that I jerked together in shock.
"We leave in fifteen minutes. If you want to freshen up, then I advise you to hurry."
Hunter
The night with Pearl in my arms had been heaven and hell at the same time. I had enjoyed feeling her so close to me. But it had also aroused my desire and suppressing it had cost me everything. I hadn't slept a wink. Accordingly, I was in a bad mood now. My erection had tormented me all night long, and even though I took care of myself while Pearl was washing up, I still felt unsatisfied and extremely unhappy.
Pearl's scream startled me from my dark thoughts. My pulse immediately accelerated. I sprinted in the direction her scream had come from. She stood beside the burned down campfire and stared paralyzed at a snake at her feet.
"Don't move!" I said and her eyes shifted to me long enough for me to see the fear in her eyes before she stared at the snake again. I took out one of my knives and threw it. The blade hit the snake right behind the head and pinned it to the gro
und. Pearl screamed, but didn't move from her position. The snake's abdomen twitched wildly, and I took out another knife, jumped at the creature and cut off its head.
"It's over, Pearl," I said and grabbed her firmly by the arms. "It’s dead! It's over!"
Pearl was staring at me, her eyes still full of fear, then she relaxed noticeably and nodded.
"Thank you", she said quietly.
I smiled encouragingly.
"We have to go! Come on!"
Any other man would have taken her into his arms to comfort her, but I was not like other men. I was not allowed to be so close to her. Last night had been bad enough. I needed distance, so I turned around and allowed Pearl to follow me. But my feelings were in turmoil. It had frightened me deeply to see Pearl in such a dangerous situation. The snake could have bitten her long before I could have reached her. Fortunately, Pearl had been so frozen by her fear that she hadn't moved. This had bought her a moment and I had arrived on time. The instinct to pull her into my arms when the danger was averted had almost made me lose control. I couldn't show her how much the scene had frightened me. I wouldn't let Pearl out of my sight from now on. I kept forgetting that she wasn't used to the wilderness and couldn't manage on her own. Even though I had to say that she was doing better than I had expected. Despite her fear, she wasn't hysterical. She had also done well with the fish. There seemed to be quite a lot more inside of her than one might think, she was able to learn and she was tough. I could show her how to survive in the jungle and ...
Whoa! Slow down!, my inner voice reminded me. You will hand her over to her father in a few days and never see her again!
The prospect of not seeing Pearl again didn't exactly help improve my mood.
The sun was very high in the sky. It had to be about noon and it was hot and stuffy. I knew that the sweltering heat had to get Pearl down much more than me. Still, she didn't whine and kept up the pace. It was time to take a break. I headed for a shady place where we could rest a little.