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A Royal Embarrassment

Page 18

by Emma Lea


  “Take care of who?”

  I rolled my eyes. As if he didn’t know. “Savannah,” I said, and then walked away without looking back.

  Savannah

  I stroked the hair back from Archer’s forehead. He was asleep in my bed in the palace, where he would stay. The queen insisted that both my father and Archer move into the residential wing of the castle. My father got his own suite and Archer would live with me. She had plans to move me to a two-bedroom suite to accommodate the both of us and had even offered a nanny and a tutor when the time came for Archer to start school. It was more than I could have ever asked for and more than I deserved.

  “How is he?” Papa asked from the doorway in a whisper.

  I sighed and stood, walking out of the room and closing the door, but leaving a small gap so he knew we weren’t too far away. “He’s good. Better than I am.”

  I crossed the room and sank into one of the plush couches. I was exhausted but I didn’t think I would be able to sleep. I was still coming down from all the adrenalin and my hands shook as I reached for a glass of wine.

  “It’s my fault,” Papa said as he slumped into a chair opposite me.

  I looked at him and noticed how old he’d gotten. Why hadn’t I seen it before? He was ageing and yet I kept seeing him as the young man he’d been as he raised me, alone.

  “If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine,” I said. “I expected too much of you, Papa. I should never have expected you to look after him twenty-four seven. It was unfair.”

  “Non, ma chérie,” he said with a shake of his head. “We were in this together. You and me and Archer. We are a family and family looks after each other. I let you down. I let the cards distract me. I am ashamed. If not for Jed—”

  I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. Jed. I had been awful to him and he had saved my baby. He didn’t have to go out in that storm and look for Archer, but he did and then I’d screamed at him like a banshee.

  “He knew,” Papa said, and I lifted my head to look at him.

  “What?”

  “He knew about my…problem. He even paid off some of my debts. He made sure Archer was occupied whenever I went into town and looked after him until I got back.”

  “What?”

  “That’s why Archer was spending so much time at the stables. Jed told me to send him there and to not leave him alone at the cabin.”

  “You left him alone at the cabin?”

  “I, uh, I got myself into a bit of trouble and I needed to win the money back. I thought Archer would be fine on his own—”

  “Stop,” I said, standing. “I can’t hear this right now. I just got him back and I can’t think of him being alone in that cabin. We’re going to talk about this, but I can’t do that now.”

  Papa nodded and I could see the hurt and shame on his face but I couldn’t deal with that right now. I needed to go and see Jed. I’d said some awful things to him and I needed to apologise.

  “Can you stay here?” I asked Papa. “Can you stay here in case Archer wakes up and doesn’t know where he is?”

  “Sure, sure,” Papa said. “I can stay. Where are you going?”

  “I need to go and speak to Jed. I said some things—” I shook my head. My father didn’t need to know any of that. “I’ll be back, but just promise me you will stay with Archer.”

  “I will,” he said. “I will stay.”

  I pulled on my coat and headed out toward the stables. How many times had I made this trek over the last few weeks? And usually with my back up and ready for a fight. I owed Jed an apology. I hadn’t known just how much he was doing behind the scenes to keep my son safe. He hadn’t deserved my anger. It was no wonder he’d begun to pull away from me just when I thought there was something blooming between us. Why would he want to get involved with me when he knew the drama my father was caught up in? I didn’t blame him from pulling away, even if it hurt my already bruised heart. But despite that, I owed him an apology for my ugly words. And I needed to thank him, not just for finding Archer but for bailing my father out.

  I stepped into the dim warmth of the stable. Horses poked their heads over the stalls as I walked by and I was no longer frightened by them. Penny looked at me and I stopped, reaching out to brush her velvet nose with my hand.

  “You kept him safe,” I whispered to her. “Thank you.”

  She tossed her head as if she knew and I smiled. They weren’t so bad, these horses, not when you got to know them. I scratched her between the eyes and then behind the ear, giving her some love.

  “I think she likes you.”

  I smiled and turned the Chase. “I kind of like her too,” I said.

  Chase stepped up beside me and handed me a treat for the horse. I held it on my palm and let Penny take it delicately with her soft lips.

  “He’s not here,” Chase said, a sad and tired note in his voice.

  “When will he be back?” I asked, knowing exactly who he was talking about.

  “I don’t think he’s coming back.”

  I sucked in a breath. “He’s gone for good?”

  “He went home. I understand his reasons, there was too much left unsaid when he left last time, but I’m pretty sure he’s gone for good.”

  I turned and leaned my forehead against Chase’s chest. He wound an arm around me. It was comforting but there was none of the chemistry that arced between Jed and me. Chase’s touch felt like a friend or an older brother and for a moment I let myself soak it in. I needed his support, just for a moment.

  “He’s an idiot,” Chase murmured into my hair. “If I ever see him again I’m going to kick his…well, what I mean is, we’ll be having words.”

  I smiled sadly into his chest and took a deep breath. Life went on. I couldn’t change what had happened and I couldn’t make someone love me. That was a lesson I’d learned years ago. I would survive this, just as I had survived everything else.

  I slept fitfully and not just because I was still churned up over what had happened. Archer was a bed hog. I didn’t know how such a little body managed to take up so much space and all the blankets. I couldn’t get him his own bed soon enough.

  He was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed the next morning and chattered happily to my maids as they fussed over him at breakfast. Archer was in his element and loving every second of the attention.

  “Coffee,” I growled as one of the maids passed a warm mug into my hand.

  I sipped gratefully and closed my eyes to enjoy the rush of caffeine through my system. Today was going to be a long day after an even longer night and I would need caffeine to get me through.

  “When can we go and see Penny?” Archer asked. “And Jed?”

  My heart stuttered in my chest and I swallowed the mouthful of coffee, trying not to choke on it. Had Jed thought about that when he’d done his disappearing act in the middle of the night? He hadn’t even bothered to say goodbye to Archer and just left me holding the bag, so to speak.

  And I was back to being angry at him.

  Anger was good. Anger was better than hurt.

  “Maman? Are you okay?”

  “Of course,” I said, forcing a smile onto my face. “We can go and see Penny after I’ve had my breakfast and dressed.”

  “Will Jed be there? I want to say sorry to him and thank you too. He came and got me, Maman. In the storm. He came and got me and Penny. I need to say thank you.”

  I forced my eyes to stay open and kept the smile on my face even though I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Where did the anger go? Now I was back to weepy and that was the last thing I needed.

  I took a fortifying sip of my coffee and then set the mug carefully on the table. I leaned forward and took Archer’s hand in mine. “Archer, mon cœur, Jed had to leave.” Just saying the words felt like a stab through my heart.

  “Is he doing some errands for Master Cliff?” Archer asked innocently, his mouth full of pancakes.

  I shook my head. “No, he had to go home.”<
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  “Oh,” Archer said, his little brow furrowed. “I thought he lived in the bunkhouse.”

  I closed my eyes briefly and swore in my head at Jed who had run away and left me to explain this. It was just like David all over again.

  “Jed lives in America,” I said, slowly opening my eyes. “He was just working here for a little while.”

  “But he’s coming back, right?” Archer asked. “He has to come back. He needs to teach me and Penny how to jump. He promised.”

  “Maybe Master Cliff can find someone else to teach you,” I said, although just the thought of it was enough to cause my gut to clench. I didn’t think I would ever be comfortable with Archer on a horse let alone racing around and jumping over things on one.

  “But I want Jed,” Archer said, his bottom lip poking out in a pout.

  “I know, baby, I know.”

  “Can we still go and see Penny?” he asked.

  “Of course,” I replied, relieved that he hadn’t broken down into a tantrum about Jed. I was expecting one and probably would have joined in with my own given half the chance.

  We finished breakfast and got dressed before trudging through the snow to the stable. Archer went straight to the room where they kept the food and treats before coming back to find Penny, his pockets stuffed full. He opened the stall and I went to stop him, but Cliff stood by watching and gave a short shake of his head. I fisted my hands and crossed my arms so that I wouldn’t pull Archer back.

  Cliff walked over and stood beside me.

  “He’s got a good touch,” he said as we watched Archer talk to Penny and feed her treats. “The horses respond to him.”

  “I wish they wouldn’t,” I replied softly. “They scare me.”

  Cliff nodded wisely. “I know,” he said, “but you can’t put that fear into the boy.”

  “Maybe if I had he wouldn’t have stolen one of the queen’s horses and tried to hide her in the forest.”

  Cliff quirked a crooked smile at me. “Maybe,” he said. “But if it wasn’t the horse, it would have been something else.”

  I sighed. I knew he was right, but I’d hoped that Archer might have waited until he was teenager before he started doing stuff like that.

  “Believe me when I tell you the boy has the touch. It’s not a bad place for him to spend his time and it keeps him out of trouble while teaching him about life and responsibility.”

  “I know,” I said with a sigh. “And I’m grateful for you taking him under your wing even if it was all happening behind my back.”

  “He cares for you,” Cliff said.

  “Of course he does, I’m his maman.”

  Cliff shook his head. “No, not the boy. Jed. Jed cares for you. He left because he thought it would be for the best. For you and for the boy.”

  “Well that’s just stupid,” I said. “How is it better for us that he’s not here?”

  Cliff lifted his head and I followed his gaze to Chase.

  “He thought something was going on between Chase and me?” I whispered.

  “It happened before and the two of you are close.”

  “Friends,” I said. “Chase and I are friends. That’s all.”

  “I’m glad of it. I like Chase, but Jed? He’s got a soft spot for you and I don’t think he had it in him to watch you and Chase become more than friends.”

  Cliff walked away after leaving me with that little nugget and it stirred up all the anger inside me again. Jed had walked away without telling me how he felt or even asking the question if there was anything between Chase and me. He just assumed, like the ass he was. Why were men so monumentally stupid? Seriously. I was better off without him.

  Chapter 19

  Jed

  There was a car waiting for me. I should have known that my father would find out about my return. I wasn’t exactly slinking home with my tail between my legs, but I was trying to get home without too much fanfare. But no, that wasn’t acceptable for a Fairchild.

  With a sigh I grabbed my bag from the carousel and started toward Fenwick. He had been driving for my father my whole life. I couldn’t resist returning his smile when he spotted me.

  “It’s good to see you sir,” he said, reaching for my bag. I let him take it. There was no point trying to hang onto it in the crowded airport concourse, it would only attract attention.

  “It’s good to see you too,” I replied. “How’s my mother?”

  “Fine, fine. The whole family is anxious to see you.”

  “I’m sure they are,” I mumbled under my breath.

  I swore silently under my breath as we exited the building and I saw the monstrous limousine waiting for us. Of course my father couldn’t have just sent one of the regular town cars, he had to send the one that telegraphed to anybody paying attention that the Fairchild’s wayward son had returned.

  Fenwick opened the door for me and I slid into the dark interior half expecting my father to be waiting for me. Thankfully the car was blessedly empty and the bar was well-stocked. I poured myself a whiskey and leaned my head back against the plush leather. I was home. It no longer felt like home, but here I was to face the music.

  I sipped the drink as Fenwick took his seat up front. The privacy screen was down and Fenwick turned to look at me over his shoulder.

  “It’ll take us at least an hour to get back to Fairview. Maybe you should try to catch up on some sleep?”

  I grunted in response and Fenwick closed the privacy screen before pulling out into the traffic. Sleep was elusive and had been the entire trip back. A thirteen hour flight where even the business class seats didn’t have enough room for my long legs.

  I hated flying. I hated coming home even more.

  I sipped my drink and looked around the interior of the car. It had been two years since I’d ridden in a limousine and I couldn’t say I’d missed the experience. Once upon a time, I had loved it. I’d loved everything about being a Fairchild and the trappings of wealth and prestige that came with it. At the time I hadn’t realised that it was a gilded cage—pretty and expansive, but a cage nonetheless. My life had been one of privilege and excess but I hadn’t known the cost and it came as a rude awakening when I finally got the cheque.

  And now I was back. I was willingly walking back into the life I had run from. I never thought this day would come. I never thought I would be back here and actually contemplating staying. And all because I was running again. The irony stole my breath.

  But Cliff had been right. I had been hiding out at Merveille instead of dealing with the fallout from my life. Waking up to the truth of who my father was and what he expected of me had been a hard pill to swallow and instead of dealing with it head on, I ran. I blamed Chase and Caroline—who indeed shared a fair sizeable chunk of the blame—and ran away from home like the immature child my father accused me of being. Instead of moving on, though, I had simply stalled. Living and working at the palace was easy. There were no demands on me and nobody knew who I really was, although I hadn’t tried to hide it. They took me at face value rather than having preconceived ideas about me because of my last name. It had been the perfect escape and an ideal place to lick my wounds. But now it was time to face the music.

  I finished my drink and settled back into the seat, closing my eyes. I didn’t know what mood my father would be in when I finally made it home. Would it be the scene from the prodigal son when the father brings out the fatted calf and celebrates the return of his long, lost son? Or would it go the other way and be pistols at dawn? With my father, it could go either way depending on what angle he was trying to run. He would have thought long and hard about those first responses when he saw me and the whole thing would be choreographed down to the smallest step. The problem was that I no longer knew the dance. I no longer cared about the dance.

  It was a major revelation, finding out that your hero was in fact the villain. I had idolised my father and hoped one day to walk in his footsteps. But all that changed the night I found Chase an
d Caroline locked in a lover’s embrace. I went to my father. Of course I would. We had the kind of relationship where I would turn to him first and he would tell me what to do. It was no different this time except that the answer I got from him was not the one I expected. I had expected him to take my side, instead he told me to grow up. He told me that there was no way I could call off the wedding. Jilting the bride was not an option, especially after the money he had paid to get her to agree to marry me in the first place.

  There was no summons to my father’s office when we got to the house. Millie, the housekeeper, informed me—after a welcoming kiss on the cheek—that my father would see me at dinner. That suited me just fine. I needed a shower and a change of clothes, possibly a shave…definitely a shave. It also gave me time to go down to the stables and walk around and see what had changed in the last two years.

  My room hadn’t changed. Millie had kept it clean and had tidied up from my rushed exit, but everything else was the same. The only noticeable change was the photo of Caroline that sat on the bedside table had been removed and I hoped burned.

  It didn’t feel like home anymore. It no longer felt like it was my room even though the detritus that lined the shelves and filled the drawers and wardrobe belonged to me. The man who lived in this room was long gone and I didn’t think he was ever coming back.

  I rolled my shoulders and cracked my neck, the tension already pulling tight and giving me a headache. Opening drawers, I found some clothes and headed into the ensuite. The shower was the only part of my life I had missed. A steam shower big enough for two with acupressure jets, two handheld shower heads, and an overhead rain shower. I took my time and worked out the knots in my shoulders and breathed in the steam that helped to clear my head. Whatever happened next, wherever I went, I needed one of these as a permanent fixture in my life.

 

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