Deuce

by Jen Silver

I am entranced. This young woman standing before me is the image I had constructed for my other daughter, Julie. Even with the hormonally induced changes, I can see the similarities between the two.

  “Well, Tess. You’ve grown.” A stupid thing to say, I know. But I feel suddenly in awe of this product of my loins.

  Neither of us moves. She is no doubt processing the changes in my looks too. On closer inspection of her face, I see some evidence of recent bruising. Before I can comment, Jay speaks up.

  “You look like you’ve been in the wars.”

  “Car accident.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. You’re both okay, though.”

  “Yeah. Apart from this.” Alice lifts the sling away from her body.

  “Have you met Konrad?”

  I’m glad that Jay is taking charge as Tess and I continue to stare at each other.

  “Um, sort of. Josh didn’t have time to introduce us properly before going off to park his car.”

  Konnie comes to stand beside me. I am grateful for his sturdy presence. He whispers in my ear.

  I nod and look at Jay. “He wants to know if we can offer our guests biscuits.”

  “Yes, of course.” She goes to the cupboard to remove a tin.

  “Konrad is my son,” I say to the two young women. I hold out my hand to Tess. “Let’s go and sit in the living room and you can tell me about yourself.”

  That statement breaks the trance and she steps into my arms. I am surprised to feel her shaking. Jay had painted a picture of a strong-minded, strong-willed person. Telling me, laughing, that Tess was a lot like me.

  Josh comes in not long after we’ve all seated ourselves in the living room. He sits on the floor next to Konnie and Ritchie. The three of them have formed a close bond. Male creatures huddled together.

  There. That is the first time I have consciously acknowledged Josh as male.

  Tess is sitting next to me on the sofa. Alice and Jay took the two chairs. This is my family. A rush of love threatens to overwhelm me. I pick up Tess’s hand and study the clear smooth skin next to my lined and liver-spotted paw. I try to keep my voice steady as I speak.

  “I truly didn’t know what to expect, coming back to a life that had moved on without me for so long. In a way it doesn’t feel real. I keep thinking I will wake up and find myself back on the island.”

  We talk some more. I ask about her parents. When she tells me that Cheryl has just celebrated her sixty-fifth birthday, I am reminded again of how much time I have missed in the lives of all these people.

  †

  Jay was tired from the long drive and the swirl of emotions she’d been corralling all day. And most of the night as she lay awake wondering if Charley really would come back to her.

  Seeing Charley with Tess was like watching a double act. They shared the same mannerisms, using their hands to emphasise points.

  Josh had sent out for pizza, phoning in the order while walking back from the parking garage. The conversations started to falter once the last slice had been consumed. Jay started to think about sleeping arrangements. Josh’s room was too small for Konrad to share with him again. She decided she could bed down in the back of the Land Rover, and Konrad could have the sofa. Charley might dispute the decision to let her have Jay’s bed, but it seemed the best solution.

  Tess and Alice finally left after agreeing that Tess would come back to talk Charley through some interview questions. Just before they left, Mo had phoned to say the BBC had a presenter lined up. Not the one we had hoped for but a woman with a good reputation as an interviewer. Friday was the proposed date for the recording to take place, scheduled for going out after the six o’clock news the following Monday.

  Jay was happy that Charley could enjoy another week out of the media glare as long as no enterprising reporter tracked her to the house. Mo informed her that some unknown person on Twitter was already setting a false trail, saying Charley had been spotted in Edinburgh. Jay suspected the Danish embassy was behind that misinformation, wanting to get rid of the journalists hanging around outside their building.

  As expected, Charley protested when Jay told her of the sleeping-arrangement plans.

  “No. This is your house. You can’t sleep in the garage.”

  “You’re our guest. So you can’t sleep there.”

  “Then we’ll share the bed. It’s big enough for two.”

  Jay would have argued further, but she was exhausted and gave in more easily than she might have done earlier in the day.

  Ritchie was torn between taking up his usual sleeping spot with Josh or staying with Konrad on the sofa. As Jay walked through the living room from the bathroom, she wasn’t surprised to see that the boy had won out. They seemed to have formed a special bond in a short time.

  Charley was already in the bed when Jay arrived in the bedroom, snuggled under the duvet. Is she wearing anything? Jay had donned her usual nightwear in the bathroom: T-shirt and boxer shorts.

  She turned off the light and slipped under the covering, carefully avoiding contact. Her hope that she would fall asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow was shattered by the proximity of Charley’s body only inches away. This arrangement might have worked in a king-size bed, but in a double, one roll to the left and she would have her face planted in Charley’s chest.

  Trying to get that image out of her mind, Jay stilled her breathing and lay rigidly with her arms pinned to her sides. If Charley fell asleep first, she would carry out her original plan and take the spare duvet down to the garage. Sleeping in the Landie wasn’t ideal, but she had done it before.

  “Are you awake?” Charley’s voice pierced the darkness, as soft and sexy as she remembered.

  “Yes,” Jay managed to croak.

  A hand snaked across the narrow gap and found hers.

  “I know it’s been a long time and you won’t want to sleep with an old woman. If you’re worried I’ve contracted any sexually transmitted diseases from being with Thorin and Konrad’s sperm donor, I can assure you I’m clear. I was given all the medical tests known to humankind during the weeks I spent in Copenhagen recently. I am attracted to you. I know we had a life together. Is there any possibility, do you think, that we could still have that?”

  Tears wetted Jay’s cheeks.

  Charley pulled her hand away. “I’m sorry. It’s too soon, I guess. I shouldn’t have asked.”

  “No. It’s not that. I’m just…oh, God…I’ve never stopped loving you. Loving the memory of you. And now you’re here. I can’t quite believe that you’re real. That you won’t disappear again.”

  The hand reached for hers again. “I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

  Letting out the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding, Jay rolled over and reached across Charley’s body. She was naked, and a warm breast met her hand.

  They found each other’s lips, and the kiss that followed was everything Jay had dreamt of over the intervening years. Everything and more as their tongues met and danced.

  When they came up for air, Charley murmured in her ear, “Take off your shirt. I want to feel you. All of you.”

  No more words were needed as Jay quickly shed her shirt and shorts. She lay back down, and the contact of their naked limbs connecting overwhelmed her senses.

  †

  “I don’t know if I’ll remember what to do.”

  “It’s like riding a bike. You never forget.”

  “I never rode a bike.”

  Jay kisses me again before removing her mouth from mine to trace a line down to my chest with her tongue. I gasp as she sucks on a nipple. Already, my lower gut is responding. I don’t want Jay to stop what she’s doing, but I want her to keep moving down my body. She seems to know without me having to ask. Her hand trails across my stomach and rests on the curls below before she lets her fingers drift further south. I gasp as first one finger, and then another enters my wet and welcoming vagina.

  Still the supreme athlete, Jay takes her time, tea
sing me with her tongue. First one breast, then the other. Then a slow series of exquisite sensations as she covers the area from my sternum to my pelvis, stopping just above my pubic hair. Her fingers haven’t stopped their movements, in and out, a little further in each time.

  I’m on the edge and want to scream, but I’m conscious of my son sleeping in the room below. When Jay’s tongue finally reaches my clit, all thoughts of disturbing anyone’s sleep disappear. My moans would wake the dead as I come, an orgasm the likes of which I know I haven’t experienced in the last twenty-three years.

  Jay lifts her head, and although I can’t see her face clearly, I know she’s grinning at me. The euphoria of a champion holding the trophy above her head as she parades around the court.

  She kisses me and I taste myself. Jay positions her legs on either side of mine and leans back.

  “Was that okay?”

  “More than okay. And you know it. Now let me see if I can remember what you like.”

  She falls easily onto her back when I give her a light push. If I had ever ridden a bicycle, I guess I could have got back on and ridden fifty miles without mishap. Loving Jay was never a problem. When we were together, I couldn’t get enough.

  Now with her lying beneath me, our legs entwined, my juices coating her thighs, I know I have forgotten nothing. Our love match continues as if it was never interrupted. The rain delay hasn’t tempered our desire to win, to gain the final match point.

  I stroke her face. The tears are gone. “Are you ready for the replay?”

  “Stop procrastinating. It’s your serve. Get on with it.”

  And I do.

  †

  Waking with the early morning light peeking through a gap in the curtains, Jay savoured the feel of Charley’s body spooned against hers.

  Recalling the selkie legends, she remembered the descriptions of them in their human forms as being amorous, affectionate, and affable with a preference for dancing in the moonlight. The stories were romantic in nature but always ended in heartbreak for the human partners.

  Charley could never be described as “affable” but she was “amorous and affectionate” and they had danced in the moonlight on many occasions.

  Jay snuggled closer, placing a hand across Charley’s belly. Her seal woman had returned and her heart was mending.

  Epilogue

  Only a week has passed since we were gathered in this living room after coming back from the cottage. This time we are waiting for a programme to start, the television interview I recorded for the BBC. There was no shortage of journalists wanting to do the questioning. Our first choice was away covering an important sporting event. I had insisted on a female presenter and the young woman they selected turned out to be perfectly acceptable.

  Tess had drawn up a list of questions, which she rehearsed with me beforehand. I didn’t have time to feel nervous once we arrived at the studio.

  Hilde has joined us this evening. Although the embassy has allowed Konrad to stay with me, they haven’t completely let go. They have even arranged for him to have English lessons to prepare him for attending school after Christmas. Although he’s already gained an impressive grasp of the language with Josh’s guidance.

  Both Jay and Josh have offered to give me driving lessons. One of the many things I have to relearn.

  Cheryl and Donna aren’t here this evening. I did meet them earlier in the week. They seemed nervous to start with. Maybe they thought I wanted to take Tess away from them. I only really wanted to thank them for being the kind of parents the girl deserved. Eventually they relaxed and we fell into our old habit of Cheryl and I talking biology, while Tess and Donna went into the kitchen to refill the drinks and snacks.

  The invitation from the university came out of the blue. They would like me to attend a graduation ceremony so I can be officially presented with my doctorate. My PhD thesis was validated in my absence and a copy even resides in the British Library.

  Mo was especially enthusiastic about this development and has offered to manage my speaking engagements. She is certain I will be in great demand. I’m not sure when I will be ready to do anything like that, if ever.

  There is a party atmosphere in the room as the theme music for the programme begins. I can hardly bear to watch. Josh and Tess are huddled over their devices, watching the Twitter feeds and posts on other social-media sites, so they tell me. Jay and Konnie sit either side of me on the sofa.

  I hardly recognise myself on the screen. The make-up artist covered over the lines and crevasses in my face and did something magical to my hair. I look twenty years younger. My voice, I’m pleased to note, comes across well. The practice sessions with Tess paid off. I waver into the emotional realm when talking about the seals and, of course, the fatal voyage of the RV Caspian.

  It is hard to describe those last moments on the boat, which only return to me in disturbing flashes, usually at night. I want to talk to Dougie when he comes back from Alaska. He understands about survivor’s guilt. It haunted him for many years after the Piper Alpha disaster, and perhaps still does. He lost his lover, as well as many friends and colleagues on that awful day.

  I lost good friends too. Anyone who has been to sea knows how dependent you are on your crewmates. But our vessel stood no chance of surviving that storm. The most experienced sailors couldn’t have prevented what happened. We thought we could outrun it; instead it pursued relentlessly and destroyed us.

  You can’t outrun your fate, yet somehow I did. I might wish that my memory had returned sooner, that those I loved wouldn’t have suffered the pain of loss for all those missing years. But then there would be no Konrad. I can’t change what happened. I can only live in this moment, thankful I have made it back, able to reconnect with those I left behind. All that might have been gone forever.

  My lover is here and I grip her hand as the interview draws to a close.

  Josh punches the air when the programme ends. “You have your own hashtag, Charley.”

  I don’t mind him using Jay’s nickname for me. It didn’t feel right for him to call me Mum. I have no idea what he means by a “hashtag”.

  Tess brings her iPad over to show me. There’s a whole string of what she calls “tweets” with “#IAmCharlotteSummersbridge” in the messages. I’m overwhelmed by the outpouring of positive comments from all these anonymous people.

  “You’re a star, Mamma.” Konnie beams at me.

  Josh gets to his feet and starts to replenish everyone’s drinks.

  Jay leans in. “We can go back to Seal View tomorrow.”

  “I would like that.”

  The background voices, the thundering noise of the sea in my head, all recede as I gaze into her eyes. That unwavering message of love captures my heart once again.

  My love…my life…restarts here.

  About the Author

  Jen Silver

  After retiring from full-time work, Jen thought she would spend her days playing golf, shooting arrows, reading, and enjoying quality time with her wife (not necessarily in that order). Instead she started writing and Affinity Rainbow Publications published her debut novel, Starting Over, in 2014. Jen now has nine published novels to her name, a number of short stories, and not as much time as she thought for other activities.

  For the characters in Jen’s stories, life definitely begins at forty, and older, as they continue to discover and enjoy their appetites for adventure and romance.

  Take a look at Jen’s blog: www.jenjsilver.com or contact her via:

  Facebook: www.facebook.com/jenjsilver

  Twitter: @jenjsilver

  Other Affinity Books

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