The Choice

by Stella Gray

  Shaking my head, I handed the phone back. So he really hadn’t been trying to hide anything about his day with Anja—or Max, rather. In fact, he’d given me fair warning and tried to make sure it wouldn’t upset me. He’d been open and honest, just like I’d wanted.

  I felt myself relax a little. The text did nothing to change the fact that the three of them looked like the perfect, happy family together, but at least it seemed like he hadn’t sat me down just now to break up with me. Not tonight, anyway.

  “Will you sit with me, please?” he asked, gesturing to the couch.

  Nodding, I rose from the chair and settled in beside him. “So how was it?” I asked. “With Max?”

  “It was…such a good day,” Stefan said, almost in wonder.

  He seemed oblivious to the turmoil I was feeling inside, but I set aside my emotions and leaned closer to listen. This wasn’t about me. This was about Stefan and his kid. Supporting their relationship wasn’t the problem; I just wish I knew where I fit into my husband’s new life.

  “That’s great,” I said, and meant it. “I’m glad you’re getting a chance to know him.”

  Stefan briefly filled me in on the conversation he’d had with Anja last night, saying she’d confessed to using her pregnancy as a bargaining chip with Konstantin, as a way to leave KZ Modeling and start a new life—not in Europe, but right here in the States. My father-in-law had been more than happy to oblige, in return for Anja’s silence and cooperation in her own disappearance. In the process, he’d been able to ensure that Stefan followed in his footsteps and stayed on the path to joining forces with KZM. Sounded like a win for everyone involved. Except my husband.

  “I’m sorry she hid all of this from you,” I said. “Max, especially. And for such a long time. You’ve been through so much.”

  He shrugged. “In the end, it doesn’t matter. The important thing is that she brought my kid back to me. Everything between me and Anja died a long time ago, but Max—he’s everything. You know how smart he is? He can name every kind of dinosaur. He gave me a lecture about the functions of camouflage!”

  I couldn’t help smiling. It was obvious that Stefan was smitten with his kid. “He sounds pretty brilliant,” I said, meaning it. “I bet he’s a lot of fun to be around.”

  “To be honest, I didn’t know if I was ready to be a father. Especially considering the way I was raised…”

  He let his words trail off, staring into the distance, probably replaying the day he’d had. I took his hand, squeezing it gently. My heart went out to him. To the child he’d once been and the man he’d grown into today. “Oh, Stefan. That’s not what defines you. When it comes to being a parent, you get to make all your own choices. And I know they’d be good ones.”

  Fatherhood would suit him. I’d already pictured it, envisioned how he would be with his kids. Strict, but loving. He would support them, encourage them to be their best selves. Do everything in his power to care for them and keep them safe and protected.

  “I think I’m really ready,” he finally said, his gaze searching mine, a look of determination in his eyes. “I want to do right by my kid. Be a good dad.”

  “You’re going to be great at it,” I told him. And I meant it. It was endearing to hear him talk about the time he’d spent with Max, though the fact that I’d had nothing to do with Stefan’s new role was bittersweet. It made me ache that I hadn’t been a part of it. “I would’ve loved to have seen you with him today,” I added.

  Stefan nodded. “I wish you’d been there, too. But it was probably better that you weren’t. Even Anja hung back all day, so the kid and I could have our one-on-one time.”

  His words hurt, but at least he was being honest. Logically, I knew I would have just gotten in the way. But the reality of our situation stung.

  “So what now?” I asked. “When will you see him again? This is just step one, right?”

  “Right. So Anja wants us to get together tomorrow night, so we can all have dinner with my dad.” He shot me a look, as if trying to gauge my reaction.

  “Okay…I guess I can handle that.” Dinner with Konstantin was far from the top of my list of favorite activities, but I’d manage. I could tell Stefan was still hesitating. “What else?”

  He squeezed my hand as he spoke. “She said it might be too many new people if you were there too. But I told her that you’re my wife and I want you there with me. That we’re a package deal.”

  “Great. I’ll definitely be there, then,” I said brightly, forcing a smile.

  Anja’s suggestion seemed cruel, but I had to admit it made sense. Max was a child, caught in the middle of a lot of confusing things. The last thing he needed was another new face added into the mix.

  “You have nothing to worry about,” Stefan said. “Anja’s just being overprotective.”

  “I mean, I can see her point,” I said. “It’s a lot of strangers for a kid to be meeting all at once.”

  “Max will be fine,” Stefan said breezily. “He’s a little shy at first, but he warms up fast. Just ask him what his favorite dinosaur is, and you guys will be best friends in no time.”

  His reassuring smile did little to assuage the anxiety I was trying to hide. Because despite my husband’s efforts to keep me included, I knew I’d still be the third wheel. I could feel it more and more as this whole thing developed. There just wasn’t a place for me.

  Even The Dirt seemed to think Stefan looked better with his shiny new insta-family. And he’d really been in love with Anja once upon a time—she’d been his first love. He’d cared enough for her all these years to continue searching for her, chasing after her. And now he finally had her back. Along with an adorable child. What else did he need?

  Stefan and I, on the other hand, had been thrown together for business reasons. Ours was a marriage of convenience—one that wasn’t convenient anymore. Though Stefan might not have realized it yet, Anja obviously did. And Konstantin was the one who’d made all these moves to get me out of the picture. I didn’t fit. I was the outsider. I always had been.

  I knew what I had to do.

  Stefan

  Chapter 10

  It was Tuesday night, and I was late for dinner. Getting out of the office had taken longer than I’d anticipated, thanks to all the catch-up work I had to do after playing hooky yesterday. And it had started raining just after dark—really coming down, pelting everything with hard, ice cold torrents of water—so traffic across town had been infuriatingly slow, the visibility poor.

  Shaking the rain off my coat in the elevator up to my father’s top floor penthouse, I couldn’t help wishing Tori was at my side. But she’d insisted on coming straight from UChicago and meeting me here. I’d tried to tell her we’d both be more comfortable if we showed up at my dad’s together, but her argument was that it would look better if at least one of us was on time. I couldn’t fight her on that. Punctuality was something my father valued highly, and considering the way things had been going lately, Tori needed all the brownie points she could get with him.

  This dinner was already a lot to ask of her. I could only imagine how hard all of this was on Tori. Truthfully, I wasn’t exactly looking forward to it either. While I was eager to spend more time with Max, that enthusiasm didn’t extend to seeing my father and Anja.

  I was doing my best to forgive her, to convince myself that the choices she’d made all those years ago had been driven by her fear of my father’s power and her love for Max. My father, on the other hand, deserved no mercy from me. Unfortunately, there was too much at stake to risk alienating him in any way. So for the time being, I had to pretend that everything was fine. That I still planned to take over KZM and run it exactly the same way he always had.

  Stepping off the elevator and heading down the hall, I checked my phone, hoping for a text from Tori telling me that things were going fine. Nothing. It was hardly a surprise. She’d been quiet lately, probably because she was processing a lot. We both were. There were going to be
a lot of changes in our lives now that Max was in the picture. I wasn’t exactly sure how we were going to make it work, but I knew that we had to. For Max’s sake.

  I rang the doorbell and one of my father’s domestic employees let me in and took my coat. A huge clap of thunder cracked outside, and I couldn’t help feeling like it was an omen.

  My father, Anja, and Max were all waiting around the dining room table. The room was lit with candles and the soft glow of the chandelier overhead, the best china and crystal laid out. There were even cloth napkins folded into little origami triangles at each place setting, like at a formal meal. I couldn’t remember the last time my father had hosted something this extravagant in his home, and that was saying a lot. He was the kind of person who loved to show off.

  “Where’s Tori?” I asked, pulling out the chair next to Max.

  “Not here,” my father said airily.

  “Really? I thought she was—”

  “Hello, Stefan,” Anja cut in. “How was work?”

  “Hi, Stefan,” Max said quietly, echoing his mother. “Did you see the light-ling before?”

  I gave Anja a half-nod and then sat down and grinned at my son. “I sure did,” I said. “It was pretty cool. Thunder’s kinda loud, though. You hanging in there okay?”

  “Yeah,” he said, but from the looks of it the poor kid seemed overwhelmed. My father could be intimidating enough, but the set-up was a lot to take in as well.

  Max was sitting up unnaturally straight in his chair, hands tightly clasped in front of him, eyes wide as they roamed the room full of antiques and the formal table settings. I understood how he felt. It was hard not to be nervous around my father’s things. You could tell at a glance just how expensive and priceless everything was. And if you broke something, god help you. My father was quick to punish.

  Not that I’d ever let my father do anything like that to Max—or any other children I might have. Nor would I do that to my own kids. I’d never repeat his parenting mistakes.

  “You’re late,” my father said, standing from his seat at the head of the table. He gestured for me to move chairs so I’d be next to Anja, but I didn’t budge.

  “I was getting caught up on a few projects,” I said. Then I looked at Max. “Sorry it took so long,” I told him. “You guys should have started without me.”

  No doubt the kid had to be hungry. It was obvious from the near-empty bread basket and bowl of olive pits on the table that they’d been sitting there picking at the appetizers for a while.

  “We’ll eat now,” my father said, his words a command. The domestic worker standing near the doorway nodded and then scurried off to the kitchen.

  I frowned. “We should wait for Tori. I don’t know what’s kept her; she should have been here already,” I said, but then noticed there wasn’t another place setting. “Where’s her seat?”

  My father just ignored me, leaning back as a bowl of soup was set in front of him.

  “We can set her up when she arrives,” Anja said, reaching across the table and gently putting her hand on my arm. “If she shows.”

  “She’ll be here. Probably just got caught in traffic. People here can’t drive in the rain.”

  Pulling my arm back, I looked over and narrowed my eyes at my father. It was no secret to my wife that he was a complete asshole, but even still, I knew that Tori would be hurt if she arrived and there wasn’t a place setting for her. Not that she’d be surprised. But I couldn’t ask them to wait any longer, that much was obvious. Max was practically inhaling his soup and had taken the last piece of bread as well.

  Excusing myself and slipping out into the hallway for a moment, I slid my phone out of my pocket and checked my missed calls and texts. There was nothing from Tori. When I called her, it rang through to voicemail.

  “Hey, hope everything’s okay. Call me back when you get this, or text me,” I said in my message. “Either way, let me know what’s up. Dinner’s started, but we’ll be here. Love you.”

  Hanging up, I paced the hallway. I expected her to call me right back. But a few minutes went by, and she didn’t. Worried, I sent her a quick text.

  I’m here at KZ’s. You on your way? Shoot me an ETA when you get a sec.

  I sent it off, waiting to make sure it was marked as delivered, but it didn’t change to “read.” Still anxious, especially with the torrential downpour that was flooding the streets out there, I waited a few more minutes. But I knew I had to return to the table.

  “Don’t you think you’re being rude?” my father asked as I sat down, when he noticed I was looking at my phone. “This is supposed to be family time.”

  “Forgive me for being worried that the woman I love is missing,” I told him coldly. “It feels a little too familiar.”

  My father just laughed, as if I was making a great joke. It was a challenge to keep my hands from clenching into fists as I tried to eat my soup.

  For a moment I considered calling Bruce, but I didn’t want to resort to that. I’d hired the bodyguard to keep Tori safe, and I felt guilty about the idea of using him as a babysitter or my personal spy like I’d done with Dmitri in the past. I’d worked hard to build trust with my wife, and I didn’t want to compromise that. Plus, it was safe to assume she might be running late from a study group or that she was hiding out from the rain or else caught in traffic. Bruce would have called if there was anything to worry about. So I’d just have to wait.

  Staying focused on Max as the main course was brought out, I managed to dodge the awkwardness of Anja’s attempts at small talk and my father’s blatant and vocal disregard of my concern over Tori. It was uncomfortable, to say the least. But nothing could ease my worry. I had to keep telling myself she’d just bailed out at the last minute, that the pressures of playing house with my ex and my kid, along with my overbearing father, had seemed like too much to handle.

  “Anja hasn’t aged a day,” my father was saying, as I tuned back into the conversation. “Most women, it’s all downhill after they have kids. They go soft, start to sag. Get lazy about taking care of themselves.”

  “Dad,” I cut in, disgusted by his chauvinism. Anja’s smile was tight and thin, but it was her eyes that gave her away. She was looking at him like she wanted to stab him with her fork.

  “Not this one, though!” my father went on, ignoring me. “Just look at her, Stefan. You really lucked out. No wonder the kid turned out so good looking, am I right?”

  “Yeah,” I said, hoping he’d move on. I didn’t want to be rude in front of Max, but I also didn’t want to give my father or Anja any ideas. Especially since my father kept acting as if she was my wife. As if Tori could be replaced just because she wasn’t here for dinner.

  Instead, he just leaned over and pointed at her with his knife. “Don’t you think she’s even more beautiful than when you two were young?”

  “She looks very strong and capable,” I said pointedly, refusing to play his game.

  My father just grinned and reached out to mess up Max’s hair in an affectionate way that almost made my jaw drop. “Hey kid, you want to tell me more about those aardvarks?” he asked.

  “Pangolins,” my son corrected him.

  “Still buzzing over your trip to the zoo yesterday?” I said. Max was the only person I wanted to talk to.

  He flashed me a huge grin. “Yeah!”

  “Max was telling me all about it over breakfast this morning,” my father butted in. “We talked about every exhibit he saw. I heard you got to walk through a whole rainforest.”

  “Did you now?” I couldn’t help glaring at him, but he just smiled indulgently at Max, avoiding my gaze. Apparently, he was going to play the role of doting grandfather this evening.

  As if we were all some big happy family.

  But that definitely wasn’t how I saw it. Tori was my family and she wasn’t here. My father could act like a kind, attentive grandparent all he wanted, but I knew the truth. He was up to something.

  As dinner progre
ssed, my anxiety gradually shifted to relief that Tori hadn’t made it. It would have killed her to see the way my father was acting. Though I did nothing to encourage it, he was talking like Anja and I were a married couple, and that we’d be staying that way indefinitely. He was also treating Max as if he’d already fully bonded with him as his first grandson. The hypocrisy stoked my rage toward the man, who’d barely spared me a second glance when I was that age.

  “Your son is going to be very handsome,” my dad told me and Anja. “Especially with such good-looking parents.”

  “He’ll be smart too, if he takes after his father,” Anja added with a smile.

  My father grinned. “Beauty on one side, intelligence on the other. He’s lucky to have the two of you.”

  Pie and ice cream had just been brought out, and I was glad that Max was devouring his with gusto and thankfully oblivious to the tension simmering between the adults at the table.

  What the hell was my father doing? Had he forgotten that he’d been the one to take Anja away in the first place—or at least make me believe that she was gone for good? He’d mocked my feelings for her when I was a teenager and now he was acting like the last eight years hadn’t even happened. I drank more wine and kept quiet, surreptitiously checking my phone again.

  Why wasn’t Tori calling me back? Had she left her phone at home again? No, that couldn’t be it. She knew she was supposed to meet me here tonight—knew I had wanted her here with me. She’d even insisted on heading here directly from school. Where was she?

  Finally Max’s face was so covered in ice cream that Anja excused both of them so she could get him in the bath and put him to bed. After they left, I rounded on my father.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” I demanded. “Stop acting like Anja and Max are my family. Tori is my family. She is my wife. Not Anja. I’ll make room for Max, but Anja and I aren’t getting back together.”