The Maple Effect

by Madeleine Cull

  That was a big lie, of course. Aaron had every right to be at the cabin considering his parents were the ones who owned it. It was June who technically shouldn’t be here, as if that fucking mattered. Either way, he wasn’t ready to explain to Aaron the real reason for keeping him and Angie apart all this time. How selfish he was for wanting to keep Aaron inside his private little bubble like some sacred sex toy (bad analogy but whatever).

  “June, you’re so stupid.” Angie flicked him on the ear and sighed. “Worrying about nothing.”

  He grimaced at the table in shame but refused to agree with her. She was right, of course. Absolutely right. He should have told her about Aaron and introduced them from the very beginning. Then he wouldn’t have run into this situation.

  His gut twisted and the crickets leaped when he forced himself to look up and meet Aaron’s gaze. It especially wasn’t fair to him. June hoped he hadn't hurt his feelings.

  “Anyway…” Angie went on when no one else bothered to say anything. “We can put it behind us now! Aaron, it’s nice to meet you.”

  She held her slender hand out to him, and he took it with a genuine smile. There was no hurt in his eyes at all, which confused June because Aaron was terrible at hiding his emotions and had every right to feel betrayed. He shouldn’t be completely unbothered by the whole thing. June couldn't believe he was getting away with this.

  Seeing his oldest friend and his newest friend shake hands and accept each other wasn’t something June realized he needed in his life until now. It calmed the anxiety smoldering in his chest; extinguished it and made room for flowers to grow. He felt, for the first time since Aaron snapped that photo, relieved.

  See, this isn’t so bad? Sure, Angie is still going to kick your ass when she has you alone, but maybe Aaron will appeal to her better nature and make it less painful.

  “Nice to meet you too,” Aaron said. “You’re an impressive dancer.”

  She snorted, and June’s ears burned.

  “Oh! And I should introduce you to Charlie.” Angie pointed with the broom handle toward the coworker who leaned grumpily on the display case watching them.

  Charlie had made the mature decision not to chase the three teens out of the shop and to the docks during their little episode. He’d stayed inside and reassured a family of four that everything was fine, and the stupid boys weren’t actually fighting. He’d scooped them ice cream alone and even assured Angie’s mom that her daughter had just taken a break when the noise brought her from her office.

  June recognized Angie’s ability to accept Aaron, and Aaron’s ability to accept her, and knew it wasn’t fair of him to think less of Charlie now. Despite June’s desire to hold and protect the duo dynamic he and Angie had built for so many years, he had to admit it would be easier this way.

  Charlie could have his stupid little crush on Angie and June could have his stupid little crush on Aaron, and at the end of the summer, it would all succumb to more memories. June imagined himself drawing a line through it, and letting it be.

  “So, who wants ice cream?” Angie clapped her hands together much in the way her mother would when taking control of a situation. “I’m thinking sorbet. June?”

  “Only the pink kind.”

  “Aaron?”

  “Oh…uhhh. Mint chip?”

  She nodded, turned away, and set the broom up against one of the tables for later. June cast another look toward his newer friend and found those green eyes looking back expectedly. They were suspended in a moment alone together, and uneasiness fizzled between them despite Aaron’s smile.

  “I promise, I won’t show anyone that photo,” he said for the fifth or six time since being knocked in the lake. “But you’re a good dancer too.”

  June rolled his eyes. He refused to acknowledge the comment. “I’m surprised you even know who Beyoncé is, considering your music collection is so outdated.”

  Aaron barked a laugh at that. “Outdated?”

  “Madonna, Motley Crew, Beastie Boys,” June ticked them off on his fingers as he went, “Nirvana, Queen—”

  “Hey, Queen is timeless!” Aaron leaned across the table at him; pointing a finger. “And I’ll have you know; I work for a radio station, so no one is more up to date on what’s trending than I am.”

  June folded his arms and pursed his lips. “Poser.”

  Aaron shrugged.

  “You work in a radio station?” Angie called from behind the display case. She was barely tall enough to see over the glass and look at them. “That’s hella cool. What do you do there?”

  “A morning show.” Aaron’s chest puffed up a little bit at the praise.

  June tried to picture it and felt instantly inferior. This Aaron? Hosting a morning talk show? That was quite a step up from his minimum wage job at the ice-skating rink back home. June spent time spraying disinfectant into smelly skates while Aaron schmoozed with all of Portland. That was so…grown up of him.

  “Amazing!” Angie returned to them with foam cups of their ice cream and plastic spoons. She set them on the table and slid gracefully into the place beside June. “I wish I could have a big city job like that.”

  Aaron murmured a thank you for the cup and blinked down at the grains in the table. June hadn’t missed the way his shoulders sagged slightly. His voice fell.

  “Yeah…I’m pretty lucky. But…to be honest, the reason I came here this summer is because I was asked to take some time off.”

  June and Angie exchanged confused glances. There was no way a guy as young as Aaron could have accrued enough overtime to be asked to take time off for no reason. The way Aaron sank back into himself, told a story of hurt.

  “You never told me that.” June gathered a spoonful of sorbet and popped it in his mouth. “Why did they make you take time off?”

  “You never asked,” Aaron pointed out. “And…there was this crazy scandal that happened. It got really out of hand on air. A lot of people heard. And in the end, I got blamed for something I didn’t even do.”

  June realized there was a lot more than meets the eye when it came to Aaron. He wasn’t just some passive teenager from Portland who didn't know how to climb trees. He was several layers of personality and maturity. He was sheltered but had more work experience than June and Angie combined. He was brave enough to flash an embarrassing photo at the cost of being chased into a lake. He had a nice car and even nicer manners.

  “Well…” Angie, always trying to lighten the mood, pointed her spoon at the other boy. “At least they didn’t fire you right?”

  “I hope not.” He shook his head and took a bite of his ice cream. “I guess I’ll have to wait and see.”

  “What was the scandal?” June asked. He could tell Aaron didn’t want to talk about it, but his curiosity burned like wildfire. He had to know.

  Aaron’s face turned down again, and a frown sat between his brows. He poked at his bowl for a long moment, considering the question. Took another bite and swallowed it thoughtfully.

  “You know how in radio stations there’s this button that you press to make you go live?” he began.

  June and Angie nodded, although he had never given much thought to the mechanics of a radio station before. He reached for another spoonful of sorbet as Aaron continued.

  “Well…the button got pressed on accident while this dude was…screwing...my…girlfriend.”

  June inhaled a whole mouthful and damned near the spoon too. He broke off in a fit of coughing, wide-eyed and struck with shock. Did his ears mislead him? What was that word? Girlfriend?

  Aaron Valentine. Sweet and kind and passive, Aaron Valentine had a girlfriend?

  Aaron Valentine was…straight?

  June let Angie pound him on the back until he came around to something other than wheezing. He couldn’t believe this! He was so positive his intuition about Aaron’s sexuality had been correct. So incredibly sure the dude played for his team! He’d refrained from mentioning it or flat out asking because many guys were
insecure about their preferences, but he’d never considered he could be wrong!

  Oh, this was bad. This was really, really bad. June wiped at his tearing eyes and sucked in a full breath to control the tickle in the back of his throat. He cleared it, gave himself a shake, and shoved Angie so she would stop smacking him.

  “I know,” Aaron agreed with June’s dramatic episode, completely oblivious to the underlying reasons. He sulked. “The entire town heard them having sex, and they all thought it was me…”

  “Would it have been worse if it was you?” Angie asked in disbelief. Maybe she thought the cost of finding out your partner was cheating on you was worse than losing a cool job like Radio Host. June disagreed.

  Aaron scratched nervously at his cheek. “No…well…I don’t know. You see they weren’t just having sex. The dude was…aggressive.”

  “Was he raping her?” Charlie, who had been listening from afar, piped up. His dark hazel eyes clouded with disapproval.

  “No…” Aaron sighed. “It was like, mutual aggression. She was begging for it…”

  “But still,” June added before he could say anything more. He didn’t need to know the details.

  “But it still sounded awful.” Aaron closed his eyes as if to dislodge the memory somehow. June wondered if he had been listening to the radio when it had happened. If he had to experience the noise firsthand or if he’d gotten the condensed version of it via word of mouth.

  “And no one believed it wasn’t me. She even went on air and made a public announcement telling people it wasn't me. They still didn’t believe it.”

  “Your…girlfriend.” June almost choked on the word again. His stomach churned. “She worked there too?”

  Aaron nodded. “She was my co-host for the show.”

  “Whoa…” Angie placed her chin in her palm and leaned over dramatically. Her eyes were a lot more sparkly than they should have been considering Aaron was obviously still upset about the whole thing. She twirled a lock of her curly hair around her finger. “So, like…the town knew you two were a thing? That’s such a soap opera.”

  Aaron whined.

  “Okay, but my question.” June dismissed his best friend. She wasn’t fucking helping. He pointed a spoon at Aaron. “Did you break up with the skank? She cheated on you!”

  Maybe the vigor in June’s voice was a little too defensive. Aaron looked at him curiously before nodding. “Yeah. Of course, I did.”

  “Damn.” Angie shook her head slowly. “Sorry, Buddy.”

  June wasn’t sure what to be mad about. The fact that someone would hurt such a nice person like Aaron, or the fact that he’d just discovered all hope was lost on his crush.

  Not that June had expected anything to come from it anyway… No indeedy, not him. He hadn’t laid in bed last night mulling over how his disposable camera gift would come across. Thinking maybe his crush would be so obvious Aaron might entertain the idea of…going on a date with him or something. He certainly hadn't speculated what it might be like to have a summer fling….

  June fought hard not to sulk into the booth. It was selfish to make Aaron’s story all about him. And anyway, as long as he’d broken up with the cheating girlfriend, then that was good enough. It would have to be.

  “It’s alright.” Aaron made an obvious attempt to perk up. “To be completely honest, I needed a vacation. And…I’m having fun here.”

  His eyes flashed up at June then. Quietly, shamelessly, he added, “I’m glad I’m not here by myself.”

  June’s ears burned and his sexuality rolled over in submission. How dare Aaron be so honest? Boys weren’t supposed to be so honest or genuine. Even while soggy and dirty from the lake June had tackled him into, Aaron managed to look like he was the lucky one. June was now positive there were no hard feelings between them, but somehow it only made him feel guiltier.

  Angie elbowed June in the ribs when he was too deep in thought to answer.

  “Ow, hey!”

  “June’s happy you’re here too.” She beamed at Aaron.

  “Whatever,” he grunted.

  7

  Sunday Morning

  Being afraid of the dark wasn’t the worst fear in the world. Juvenile maybe, but not as unmanageable as one might think. A few key conditions ignited Aaron’s fears, making it far more complex than just flipping a switch. For one, he always felt relatively safe in his car, but only while it was in motion. And the familiar space of his own home, which he could navigate with his eyes closed, was a safe space no matter which lights were off.

  Aaron struggled the most with large open areas, especially ones unfamiliar to him. He'd struggled at sleepovers as a kid, usually faking ill so his mom or aunt would come to pick him up. He struggled with parks in the early morning hours when Arco had tried so hard to convince him to work out with him. He struggled with a lack of background noise to fill his ears, making fresh falling snow (a normally peaceful experience) one that set his nerves on edge.

  Here at the cabin, he struggled with the forest outside the guest bedroom window looming over him. It taunted him when he couldn’t get to sleep, singing songs of coyotes and bobcats howling. Even the incredible view of the moon brightening the edges of the pines did nothing to ease his nerves.

  To combat this, Aaron typically stayed up later than June with his bedroom light on, waiting for the other boy to fall asleep. When he did, Aaron opened his bedroom door and flipped the hall light on so it cast a milky yellow hue toward him. He’d crawl in bed, plug his phone into the charger despite not having any service, and fall asleep quickly.

  Tonight, wasn’t like most nights.

  June wouldn’t go to sleep, and the moon was nothing but a sliver in the sky. It was well past one in the morning, making his brain tired and his body ache. He wasn't used to staying up quite so late, and they’d spent their day down at the lake swimming. The sun slowly sucking their energy. Aaron was hot and slightly sunburnt. He was grouchy. He was tired.

  He was anxious.

  He lay in the shitty pull-out bed, uncomfortable knowing he could hear June across the hall. It was mostly tossing and turning with an occasional murmur to his cat, but it did nothing to ease Aaron’s nerves or desire to rest. The light above him was beginning to hurt his eyes so much he decided he couldn’t take it any longer.

  He rolled out of the loud springy bed and to his feet in one motion. Ran a hand through his sticky hairline and sighed. Peeled his shirt from his skin and sauntered to the door.

  Out in the hall, it was a lot easier to feel the flow of air conditioning. He sighed almost immediately, letting the floor vent blow cool against his ankles for a long moment. He even considered lying down on the carpet right there.

  “Aaron?” June’s voice filtered through the crack of the master bedroom door. Just wide enough for Quail to come in and out of.

  Aaron blinked, trying to ignore the fact June was submerged in a room even darker than his, with the light off. There was no moon on that side of the house to cast a glow, and usually, the curtains were drawn tightly together. Uneasiness made his chest tight, but he couldn’t just stand there and not answer the other boy.

  “Yeah?”

  “Are you hot?” June asked. A flicker of humor laced his tone. It occurred to Aaron he was backlit by the light from his bedroom, and even though he couldn’t see June through the crack, June must be able to see him.

  He placed his hand on June’s doorknob and pushed it open farther, letting the pale light spray across the bigger bedroom. Aaron frowned.

  “It’s like a sauna in there.”

  June blinked obviously at him. “Well, yeah, there’s no A.C. vent in that room.”

  “Well, I can’t sleep,” Aaron grouched from the doorway. He didn't have to tell June he was afraid of the dark when he had a perfectly good excuse for being awake at this hour. “I’m going to sleep on the couch.” He began to slide the door closed.

  If he were lucky, the pantry light and the porch light would be enoug
h to set him at ease. And if not, hopefully, he was too damn tired at this point to care.

  “Wait,” June whispered at him, so softly, he almost hadn’t heard it.

  “What?”

  Hesitation. Aaron waited another moment before pushing the door open again and peering inside. June lay on his stomach with the oversized comforter bunched up under him. His face soft in low light and his shoulders bare. When their eyes met, he immediately looked away.

  “We can share?” It was a question more than a suggestion, but June hoisted himself over from the middle of the bed to one side of it anyway. As if to show it was a serious offer. “It’s cooler in here than it is in the living room.”

  A slow and burning shame grew in the pit of Aaron’s stomach. This was exactly the kind of thing that made fear of the dark difficult. Falling into a situation he either had to lie his way out of or make a total ass of himself. He licked his lips, considering all the times he’d turned down a dark room for the sake of fear he couldn’t control. All the sleepovers, camping trips, and even opportunities to have sex. His insides squirmed with remorse, anger toward himself rose.

  He couldn’t be sure what compelled him at that moment, but he saw June’s expression totally unguarded for perhaps the first time since they’d met and mentally kicked himself in the shin. Maybe it was the fact that he didn't want to hurt June’s feelings or the fact that it was just too hot for his brain to work properly, but either way, he released the doorknob and shuffled inside.

  The light in the bedroom across the hall was still on…the doors were open… He could still see. As his eyes adjusted and the details became more obvious to him, he convinced himself this was fine. He would be fine.

  The coolness of the room was potent, as was the unfamiliar smell. Vastly different and more inviting than the mothball stench he had slept in for a couple of weeks now. It smelled lived in, like the rest of the cabin and also very much like June. Like earth and generic bar-soap.