Promise Me Tomorrow

by Lori Wick

  “Hello,” Rusty said.

  “Hello. I thought you might have retired.”

  “We’re just talking.”

  To Chase’s eyes they both looked very tired, but he didn’t comment.

  “Did you need something?” Rusty asked.

  “Just to speak with you when you have a chance.”

  She nodded. “Will you be in the drawing room?”

  “Yes. Come at your leisure.”

  “All right.”

  “What happened then?” Quintin asked when his father left.

  “Well, Zacchaeus ran ahead of the crowd and climbed into a tree. He knew that Jesus was going to come that way, so he waited, and sure enough, Jesus stopped right under the tree, looked up, and spoke to him. Jesus even told Zacchaeus that He wanted to have a meal with him. The two ate together, and Zacchaeus’ life was changed forever. He saw that he was a sinner and needed Jesus Christ to forgive him.”

  “Why is that your favorite Bible story?”

  “Well, I love all the stories about Jesus, but I especially like Zacchaeus because he’s short like me.”

  “My father is tall. He could have seen Jesus.”

  “Yes, he is. You’ll have to tell him that.”

  The look that Rusty had become accustomed to seeing at the mention of Chase McCandles now covered Quintin’s face. Was it yearning or indifference? She honestly couldn’t tell. What did this little boy think of his father? Did he know him well enough to have any opinion about him?

  “I think you’d better sleep now, Quin,” Rusty suggested. If she didn’t rein in her thoughts on this subject, she’d be sorry.

  “Are you going downstairs?”

  “Yes. Will you be all right?”

  “I think so.”

  “If you need anything, just come to the drawing room.”

  As had become their custom, Quintin now stood on the bed so Rusty could give him a long hug. She rocked him from side to side as her arms held him close.

  “I love you, Quin.”

  “I love you, Aunt Rusty.”

  “Sleep well, Quin,” she said as she kissed his small cheek. He scrambled into bed and waited while she tucked the covers close. This was the way Clayton Taggart had always put his children to bed. Rusty’s father would have wrestled Quintin a little and snuggled him again, but Rusty only leaned down so they could rub noses. Quintin smiled up into her eyes. Rusty exited but left the door open. Her mind was busy, but her movements were serene. Indeed, her feet made almost no noise as she moved to the stairs.

  32

  After leaving Rusty and Quintin on their own, Chase found his usual chair in the drawing room, the one that let him see the stairs and foyer. He hadn’t been looking for her, but because he was expecting her, he came to his feet the moment he saw Rusty descending. She smiled kindly when she saw him, but to his eyes Quintin’s caregiver still looked tired. He determined not to keep her long.

  “Would you like anything? I’m sure Mrs. Whitley is still in the kitchen.”

  “Thank you, no. I’m fine.” Chase nodded and took his seat. “I wanted to speak with you about Quintin. How do you feel he’s doing?”

  “Very well. He climbed a tree today, and it was his idea to go and see Dobbins.”

  “Have you taken the cart around the grounds yet?”

  “Yesterday. I thought we might be noisy, so we tried to stay away from your office windows.”

  Why such a statement would bother Chase, he wasn’t certain, but it did. Was it her tone or just the fact that he would have enjoyed seeing them come past the window? For a moment he was incapable of responding. As the silence lengthened, Rusty shifted in her seat, drawing Chase’s attention back to her. He had the impression that she was ready to make her excuses and head upstairs for the night, but Chase had one more thought on his mind. “I saw Pastor Radke today,” he said suddenly. “He commented to me that you and Quintin seemed to be getting along well.”

  Tired as she was, Rusty smiled. “I’m glad he noticed. Quintin and I have been by to see him a couple of times. He always has a kind word. And Quin genuinely seems to enjoy him.”

  Chase was surprised that Rusty and Quintin would visit their pastor, so much so that he had no immediate reply. Again he was silent for so long that Rusty thought they were finished.

  “Was there anything else, Mr. McCandles?”

  “No.” Chase shook his head and then cordially asked, “Unless there was something you wanted to discuss with me.”

  Rusty looked at him, at least 20 things coming to mind, but only shook her head no.

  Chase nodded, but he knew very well that she had things she wanted to say. Had she not looked so weary he might have pushed the point.

  “I’ll say goodnight now, and if I don’t talk to you again, have a good trip, Mr. McCandles.”

  “Thank you. Goodnight, Katherine”

  A study in courtesy, Chase came smoothly to his feet and remained standing until Rusty was well out of the room. He sat down again but felt immediately restless and stood up. He wasn’t scheduled to leave for Pueblo until the following afternoon, but it wasn’t that easy to find an audience with Rusty when she was taken up with Quintin’s care.

  Chase suddenly caught himself and stopped pacing. He debated going back into his office to work, but that was not a habit he wanted to fall into. He stood now in the huge bay window on the east side of the drawing room, his eyes roaming over the spring landscape.

  I have no idea what to do, Lord. I have the uncomfortable impression that Katherine wishes she’d never taken the job. I knew how good she would be—I’ve never seen Quintin so happy—but I can’t shake the feeling that she wishes she’d never come. Should I say that outright? Should I come right out and ask her? The staff all enjoy her, I can see that, so it must be Quintin or me, or possibly both of us.

  Chase had no answers. It wasn’t enough for him that the job got done. If Rusty was disturbed, he wanted to know. Chase turned to look back at the sofa where she had been sitting. She had looked so tired. Although there were things he needed to prepare, his train didn’t leave until two o’clock the next day. He would keep an eye on things over breakfast and as the morning passed. If anything seemed amiss, he would talk to Rusty on the spot. The plan gave him rest, and when he sought his bed and opened his Bible, he felt at peace. He read for more than an hour and slept as soon as he turned down the lantern.

  Rusty woke slowly and stretched. She had slept so soundly that her hip ached where she had lain on it most of the night. It took a moment to get her eyes fully open, and when she did, she reached for her Bible. The morning was chilly, so she rolled off her painful hip and onto the other and sank down beneath the covers to read in the book of Ephesians. She silently studied Paul’s prayer in the third chapter.

  For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; that Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend, with all saints, what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height, and to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fullness of God.

  Here Rusty had a note in her Bible. It simply said:

  “Filled with all the fullness of God.”

  That as much as God is, we will be like Him.

  Rusty mulled the words over in her mind and then read them again. “Filled with all the fullness of God” was a line of Scripture that captivated her. The fullness of God was an awesome thing, almost too much to take in. But Paul had prayed it for the believers in Ephesus, and this told Rusty that it was something to be attained.

  Rusty read on: Now unto him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us. Rusty closed her eyes to think about what she had just read. Not m
any seconds passed before she began to pray.

  I might be overwhelmed in trying to learn what Your fullness is, Lord, but You’re able to do more than I can even ask of You. Thank You for the prayer in chapter one, Father. Thank You for this reminder that I must never forget what You did for me. Thank You for dying for me and then coming from the dead to conquer death forever. Thank You for bestowing on me all the riches of heaven. Such riches are not without responsibility, Lord, so please help me to stand strong and keep going even when I don’t want to.

  Rusty lay still and thought about what she’d just asked. She had never dreamed how hard it would be to live in this house. She thought back to her brief conversation with Chase the night before. He knew something was wrong—she could tell by the way he watched her—but she still believed it wasn’t her place to give advice.

  So what is my place? she asked the Lord. Without having to think very long, she had her answer. I’m here to take care of Quintin. That’s all. If I see things that go against Your Word, Lord, then I can ask You to intervene. Her mind resolved, she got out of bed in order to clean up and dress.

  Rusty felt her heart lighten. She had a job to do, and she was going to do it to the best of her ability. Quintin McCandles would be the recipient of her faithfulness, and that was impetus enough to keep Rusty going.

  Will I ever have my own child, Lord? Every year I see children leave or, like this summer, I commit my heart and then have to walk away. Will You remember me, Lord, when You think of motherhood? Will You please remember how much I want children of my own?

  “Aunt Rusty,” a small voice sounded just outside Rusty’s door. She was dressed, although her hair wasn’t combed, but she did not go to the door. She waited for Quintin to open it just a crack and then dashed around the bed and into the closet. She knew Quintin saw her from the delighted giggles that followed her across the room.

  “I saw you, Aunt Rusty. You can’t hide from me.”

  But hide she did, and it was a few minutes before Quintin found her behind the dresses in her walk-in closet.

  “I see your shoe,” he cried triumphantly, and with that Rusty came rushing at him. He squealed and tried to run, but she was too fast. She grabbed him with a triumphant cry and ran out to toss him onto the bed. A wrestling match ensued, lasting until they were both laughing too hard to move.

  “I’ve got to finish getting dressed,” Rusty said, her voice still breathless. “It’s time for breakfast.”

  “I’ll wait for you.”

  “All right. I just need to do something with my hair.” She scooted off the bed and made for the mirror.

  “Put it on top,” Quintin recommended, and Rusty turned to him, confusion lowering her brow.

  “On top?”

  “Yes, like in the picture.”

  “Oh, all right.”

  As Rusty’s hands began to gather and brush, she remembered the small photo album she had brought along. It showed all of her family, including a very formal picture of her with her siblings. It was for this photo that she had piled her hair atop her head. This was not something she usually did unless it got very warm, but to please Quintin she went to work.

  “You missed some,” he offered, having come close to advise her.

  “I’ll get it,” she assured him. “How’s that?” Rusty finally turned to present herself, and Quintin smiled.

  “I like it.”

  “Thank you. Now, help me make the bed, and we’ll get something to eat. Did you make your bed?”

  “I think so.”

  “Well, did you or didn’t you?”

  “I tried.”

  “I think I’ll check for myself,” Rusty decided, her voice quiet but firm.

  “I’d better go try again.”

  Rusty shook her head when he dashed from the room. She finished the bed on her own and then sought him out.

  “Well, now, this is nice, Quin. I can tell that you tried hard.”

  He smoothed one more wrinkle and looked very pleased.

  “Shall we go down?”

  He skipped over to take her hand, and just a few moments later they were entering the breakfast room. Chase was already in attendance.

  “Good morning,” Rusty said to him, smiling.

  “Good morning,” Quintin echoed her.

  “Good morning to both of you,” Chase replied in his usual quiet way. But he was feeling anything but quiet inside. It hadn’t occurred to him how different Rusty might look with her hair up, but the change in her was dramatic. The effect was heightened by the pale blue blouse, which sported a high collar around her neck. She looked very lovely and mature, and right now, thankfully unaware of the way Chase stared.

  “Doesn’t that smell good, Quin? I’m hungry.”

  “You’re always hungry, Aunt Rusty.”

  The remark swiftly grabbed Chase’s attention away from Rusty’s appearance. He thought such a remark to be impertinent, but his son’s companion obviously didn’t agree.

  “I am always hungry, aren’t I, Quin?” Her voice revealed no affront.

  “It’s because you don’t clean your plate,” Quintin explained.

  Chase waited for Rusty to correct his son, but a reprimand never came. Instead she took what she wanted from the buffet and made her way to the table.

  “No, I don’t,” she agreed good-naturedly. “I get distracted, but I’m always satisfied.”

  Rusty and Quintin had finished filling their plates, their backs to the room’s other occupant. When they took their seats at the table, Rusty saw very swiftly that her employer’s attention was not on his food or paper, but she didn’t comment. She bowed with Quintin, said a prayer of thanks for the two of them, and then picked up her fork.

  “I took too much eggs.”

  “Did you, Quin?” Rusty was glad to have something else to think about. “Just finish what you can and next time take less. You can always go back for more.”

  “Do you want some?”

  “No, thank you, dear. I took only what I needed.”

  Rusty went back to her food, but not before she glanced at Chase. He was not staring at them anymore, but something told her that he would seek her out before leaving town. Rusty guessed correctly. As the trio finished their meal, Chase sent Quintin to the kitchen on his own and asked to see Rusty in his office. He spoke to her without shutting the door or taking a seat.

  “I’m a little concerned with how familiar Quintin has become with you. I find him impertinent when he tells you that you’re always hungry.”

  All color drained from Rusty’s face. She felt as if he’d just thrown ice water on her. “I’m sorry, sir,” she said with soft sincerity. “I forget my position here—as one of your employees, that is. I’m sorry I’ve been too familiar with Quintin.”

  “Katherine, I was not speaking of your behavior but of Quintin’s.”

  Rusty swallowed past a dry throat and frowned in confusion. Chase could see that he’d lost her.

  “Do you not find it rather personal when he tells you that you don’t finish what’s on your plate?” he asked.

  “Yes,” she said slowly, “I guess I do find it personal, but I don’t find it offensive. If I could be so bold as to ask, sir, if Quintin can’t be informal and at ease with me, with whom can he get close?”

  Chase visibly started. He opened his mouth and shut it again. He didn’t have an answer.

  “I’m sorry, sir.” Rusty felt immediate regret. “I shouldn’t have said that. You’ve asked me not to be too familiar with Quintin. In the future I’ll do my best to remember.” Rusty fell silent, waiting to be dismissed. She tried to ignore the painful squeezing sensation around her heart, but she was all too aware of it.

  Chase couldn’t believe what she’d just asked him. With startling clarity he remembered the teasing and laughter around the Taggarts’ table in Boulder. Chase knew in an instant that it was time to find a wife. His son couldn’t grow up as lonely as he had. He had to have some siblings, but in the m
eantime …

  Chase realized that Rusty was still standing in front of him. Her eyes looked large enough to swallow her whole face, and until that moment Chase didn’t realize how much his words must have hurt her. He tried to make amends.

  “I think I’d like us to forget about this conversation, Katherine. You’re right, Quintin doesn’t have anyone with whom to laugh and joke. In the future, I’ll leave his manners and choice of words to your discretion.”

  “All right.” Rusty was relieved, although she still felt somewhat bruised. “I feel that I should tell you, Mr. McCandles, that Quintin is always polite. He thanks me for reading to him and for helping him with his shoes. I’ve yet to find him disrespectful. Mrs. Harding did a very thorough job.”

  Chase nodded, but no words came.

  “Was that all, sir?” Rusty finally asked.

  Chase looked down into her pale face and felt a sudden need to stay home. It was too late to cancel his appointment, but he wouldn’t stay any longer than absolutely necessary.

  “Yes, that’s all, Katherine. Please send Quintin to me. I’m going to leave earlier than I’d planned, but I’ll be home no later than Thursday.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Rusty slipped away, and Chase looked after her with regret. She was doing a great job, and he’d made her feel like she’d failed. For some reason his eyes lingered on the back of her slender neck as she made her way through the drawing room. She seemed so vulnerable to him that he felt an ache inside.

  I didn’t even tell her how nice her hair looks. His thoughts were cut off when Quintin came into view. His words to the little boy were brief, and just minutes after he spoke to him, Chase headed out the door for the train station. His only thought was to get to Pueblo and return home as swiftly as possible.

  33

  Rusty received two very welcome letters on Thursday. The remainder of Tuesday had been hard as she’d tried not to take Chase’s words personally; he had been on her mind off and on all day. Rusty kept reminding herself that he had only been concerned about his son, but she was surprised by how much the conversation had affected her. Wednesday had been almost as bad as the scene had been on her mind all that day as well.