No Looking Back

by Kate L. Mary

  Landon had dated another women. More than that, he’d loved another woman, had loved her enough to imagine a future with her, to propose to her, to give his heart to her.

  It had been stupid for me to imagine that his life over the last five years had been futile and empty as mine, but I couldn’t deny that I had.

  “Did she die?” I managed to get out.

  “She did.” He looked down at his hands. “She got sick, just like everyone else, and went fast. Only three days between her first symptoms to the night she died. I was with her, at her apartment, and even after she was gone I couldn’t bring myself to leave. I was still there when she came back.”

  The pain on his face when he said the last sentence made me want to reach out to him, but with my own pain still fresh, I couldn’t make myself do it. Maybe it was selfish, or maybe it was kinder than trying to pretend I was grieving a woman I would never know and never could have liked.

  “I’m sorry you had to go through that,” I said, and once the words were out, I realized they were true.

  “Thank you.”

  We lapsed into silence and I finally pulled myself to my feet, and Landon followed, but his focus was back on the bed.

  “Do you think we can bury them?”

  “Maybe…”

  I thought about the bodies and how decayed they now were. We could keep them wrapped in the sheets, but even then it wouldn’t be easy or mess-free.

  They were Landon’s parents, though, and I understood him wanting to put them to rest. Plus, if I helped him, he could help me with my own family. My parents, grandma, sister and brother, nieces and nephews. Some of them wouldn’t still be in their homes—they were out there somewhere, stumbling through town—but it was possible one or two of them had been put down…

  I wanted to cry just thinking about revisiting them, and I had to look away, too ashamed to tell him I wasn’t strong enough to handle it.

  “Another day,” he said as if reading my mind. “Or I can get someone else to help me.”

  “Yeah,” I said, studying the wood floor beneath my feet.

  It was original to the house and had been Landon’s mother’s pride and joy. She’d always made sure it was swept and mopped, and I could remember the way the sun would shine in through the windows, practically reflecting off the smooth surface. Almost like it was a mirror instead of a floor. It was dusty now, scraped in places from the people who’d raided the house, dragging items we could use out.

  “We should get back,” I said when neither one of us said anything else.

  “Okay.”

  I walked out into the hall and Landon followed, pulling the door shut behind him. He stood there for a moment with his head bowed and his eyes closed as if saying a silent prayer, his hand resting against the closed door. His parents had been religious, our families had attended the same church, but I’d never seen Landon pray before now. Maybe he wasn’t praying, though. Maybe he was just telling his parents goodbye.

  When he finally turned, his face was oddly serene considering what he’d just been through. “I’m ready.”

  I nodded once and turned toward the stairs, pulling my rifle off my shoulder before I’d even taken one step down. The house was as silent as it had been when we arrived, and just like on our way up, our footsteps seemed to pound through the empty space surrounding us.

  “I’m going to miss this place,” Landon said.

  “You never know, maybe one day things will be something that resembles normal and we can come back here. Live in a house and have jobs and school and a regular life.”

  Behind me, Landon snorted. “Five years apart and I can still tell when you’re full of shit.”

  I looked back at him, a small smile on my lips even though sadness weighed me down. “A girl can dream, can’t she?”

  “Yeah,” he said, returning my smile. “And I guess these days dreams are pretty much all we have.”

  “No,” I replied. “We have each other, too. I’m glad you’re back, Landon. Even if we never kiss again. No matter what happens with us, I’m glad to know you survived this thing.”

  “Me too,” he said, and this time his smile was bigger. “And I wouldn’t put money on us never kissing again. We may feel like different people now, but there’s one thing that never changed. I never stopped loving you, April.”

  My heart swelled and my smiled widened, but the tears of happiness in my eyes blurred his face.

  “I never stopped loving you, either.”

  Chapter 7

  Outside, the spring day was as clear as I’d thought it would be this morning when I stepped out of my RV. Except, thanks to Landon’s presence at my side, it now seemed nearly blinding in its brightness.

  The tingle of his lips on mine lingered as we started walking, and his words hung over me like a rainbow after a brutal storm. He never stopped loving me.

  What did that mean for the woman he’d promised to marry? I didn’t know, but it also didn’t matter. She was gone, and so was the promise he’d made to her. We not only had a clean slate, but we were facing a future unlike anything we’d ever imagined, one where anything could happen.

  Landon and I moved side by side at a steady pace in a silence that, while comfortable, was thick with grief. He needed the quiet to think, so even though I had a million things I wanted to tell him and ask him, I said nothing.

  We hadn’t made it far, less than three houses away, when the sound of moans echoed through the air. My rifle was slung over my shoulder, and I pulled it forward on instinct, keeping it up and ready just in case. I had a knife strapped to my hip as well, and it would only take a second to pull it out if I needed it. Hopefully, there were just one or two and we’d be able to take them down silently and easily with our blades.

  I slowed, but didn’t stop, and at my side Landon had done the same. Like me, he had a gun out, a pistol, and a knife in his other hand, and he was scanning the area.

  “Where are they?”

  Another moan broke out, this time followed by a few others, and I turned toward the sound. The dead still hadn’t revealed themselves, and my pulse quickened.

  Across the street from us stood neglected home after neglected home, each one more depressing than the last. The overgrown yards seemed ominous at the moment, as if they harbored enough secrets and deadly things to take the rest of humanity out for good, but still there was nothing around. No sign of the dead, and with the way their sounds bounced off the surrounding buildings, it was difficult to pinpoint where they were coming from.

  Finally, a zombie stumbled into view, coming from between two houses on the opposite side of the street. His moans had the same unearthly quality that every other zombie possessed, and he was already reaching for us, his fingers grasping at air. I lowered my rifle and reached for my knife, readying myself for the confrontation, but hadn’t even had the chance to pull my weapon from its sheath when two more zombies stumbled into view less than five feet behind the first one. Even worse, they were followed by more.

  The dead seemed to pour out of the backyard after that, stumbling and tripping their way across the uneven earth as they headed our way. At my side, Landon swore, and even though I was already stumbling back, he grabbed my arm and pulled me as he, too, moved away from the advancing horde.

  “There are too many,” he said.

  They’d begun pouring into the street, making it impossible to continue on our current course unless we wanted to fight our way through. I didn’t, though, because even with guns, the two of us against a horde this size were impossible odds. Even knowing the settlement was just around the corner and whoever was on guard would come running to our aide at the first sound of gunfire didn’t make me confident that we could take a group this size. It was too risky, and the best chance we had would be making a run for it.

  Only, I didn’t know where. There was only one way back to the settlement, which was part of the reason we’d set up there to begin with, and it was currently cut off. We c
ould go back the way we came, back to Landon’s house maybe, or even one of the other houses on the street, but doing that would effectively trap us if the horde decided to follow. They’d surround the house and we’d be stuck until someone came to our rescue. Who knew how long that would take.

  We were trapped. Cut off from the rest of our group unless I could think of a way out of this.

  Inspiration hit so suddenly it was like I’d been slapped in the face with it, and I turned on my heel, grabbing Landon as I did, and took off across the street.

  “This way.”

  He didn’t question me as we ran side by side. Behind us, the dead were still moaning, still advancing, and still stumbling from between the houses. It was like the entire town had gathered for a picnic and decided to use us as the main course.

  Across the street, I charged up the driveway of an old two-story home that had probably been built in the early 1900s. Like a lot of the buildings, the winter had left it looking abandoned and neglected, but despite that, there was still something regal about it that the newer homes in town didn’t seem to possess. Like an aging king or a former president on his deathbed.

  Landon followed wordlessly, not breaking the silence until we’d reached the backyard. “You have a plan?”

  “I do.” I nodded toward the fence that ran between the two yards, marking the property line. “Over.”

  “It’s not going to keep a group like that out for long,” he said, eyeing the four-foot high wooden fence.

  He was right. The wooden planks had seen better days, and at this point I doubted they were even sturdy enough to keep a small dog in the backyard. Thankfully, I didn’t plan on staying long enough to have that theory tested.

  I threw myself over the fence, not even batting an eye at the ungraceful way I plopped to the ground on the other side. Landon was over by the time I pulled myself to my feet, and I gave him a nod to let him know I was okay before heading across the yard.

  “We don’t need to keep the zombies out, we just need to make it to the waterfall.”

  “Waterfall?” Landon repeated

  On the other side of the yard, the fence looked even more dilapidated, making getting over it easier. This time I managed to climb over and stay on my feet instead of wiping out, which I was thankful for. My shoulder throbbed from the first impact, and even though it was only a bruise, I wasn’t interested in falling on it a second time.

  Moans and growls bounced off the surrounding houses as the zombies converged on the yard we’d just fled. Like we’d thought, the rickety fence only held them back for a minute or two before giving with a crack that echoed through the air.

  “They won’t be able to maneuver the steps leading down to the falls,” I said as we ran side by side, heading for the next yard. “Even more importantly, we’ll be able to climb out on the other side and make it back to the settlement.”

  “While possibly leading the entire horde that way,” Landon said.

  “We’re fortified. We’ve had hordes show up before and we’ve been fine. This will be no different.”

  “If you say so,” he said doubtfully.

  I didn’t respond.

  We made it through the final yard, which was unfenced, and squeezed our way through an opening between an old iron post and a stone wall. Once there, we found ourselves on the stone path that lead down to the falls. It ran behind what had once been the West Milton Inn, a restaurant that had closed its doors years before and had since sat empty. Wedged between the old building and trees, the path wound its way down, eventually giving way to a staircase that led to the bottom of the small waterfall.

  The steps were old, covered in green moss and made of stone with a metal railing on one side, meant to keep you from falling into the water below. They had always seemed treacherous to me, and with the moans pounding against our backs, that feeling only increased.

  I lead the way down, holding onto the railing as I did, the metal cold against my palm despite the sunny day. Not that it felt sunny right now. The trees over us were thick with early buds, and blocked out most of the sun’s rays, making everything dark and ominous.

  Footsteps pounded against the cement behind us and I turned to face it, my rifle up and ready. The first few zombies came into view, pushing and shoving each other to get at us, while Landon and I continued moving down. We seemed to have lost a lot of the horde somewhere along the way, and less than a dozen had followed us down the stairs. The odds were better, but still not good, and there was no way I could fire a gun. That would only succeed in drawing the attention of every zombie we’d managed to lose.

  I slung the rifle over my shoulder and pulled my knife. “We can do this if we work together. They’re going to fall on these steps, and when they’re down and trying to get up, we can take them out.”

  “I’ve got your back,” Landon said, momentarily distracting me from the dead.

  He used to say that to me all the time. When I had fights with my parents, when I was mad at girlfriends, when I couldn’t decide which college to go to.

  “April,” Landon said just before striking, bringing my focus back to the moment.

  One of the zombies had stumbled and fallen, taken a few others down with him, and just like I’d predicted, they were having a difficult time getting up. Landon pressed his hand on the back of the zombie on top of the pile, holding him down while he slammed his knife into the creature’s head. I did the same with the zombie trapped in the middle, and I’d just yanked my knife free when Landon slammed his blade into the skull of the third.

  “Good,” he said with a gasp, smiling. “I have to say, of all the moments I thought we’d share, I never thought killing zombies would be one.”

  “You always did have a very limited imagination.”

  Landon let out a chuckle just as another zombie fell over the bodies already littered across the steps and tumbled down. He didn’t have a chance to even try to get up before I’d slammed my knife into his head.

  One after another the dead followed this example, falling to the ground where they struggled to get up only to be met with their final deaths. Soon, there were only a few left and they were at the top of the stairs. The bodies had piled up until they found maneuvering the steps impossible. They’d get by some only to get tangled in the limbs of others, making getting to us impossible.

  The bad news: we were also cornered.

  “What now?” Landon asked.

  I looked to my side, to the stone wall that ran up the hill. It was covered in ivy, but we could still climb it. Once we did, we would be home free. The settlement was right across the street.

  “Up,” I said, shoving my knife into its sheath so I could climb.

  Chapter 8

  I was panting by the time I made it up the hill. My nails were caked in dirt and my clothes were just as bad, but we’d made it and were almost home free now.

  The road was in front of us, so close the relief was already settling over me. All we had to do was pull ourselves up and cross the street and we’d be home, and if any of the zombies decided to continue down the street, our people on guard duty would be there to help.

  I had just pulled myself up the hill but froze when the roar of car engines broke through the silence. It seemed like such a foreign sound after all these months. Yes, we had a few vehicles we took out on runs, but only one at a time, never in a group like this. It would be a waste of resources—gas was already getting scarce—and would draw too much attention.

  Just as the first vehicle came into view, Landon grabbed my arm and pulled me down, and together we huddled behind a few bushes. We were out of sight but still able to get a glimpse of the street, and we watched in silence as another car appeared, followed closely by two more.

  There were four vehicles in all. Two trucks, both of which had metal plates welded to the sides and large guns mounted in the back, and two smaller cars that were equally decked out. They looked threatening even before I got a glimpse of the men, but whe
n a broad man with a bull of a face stepped out of the first car, all it took was one look at his sneer to know these people were not here to make friends.

  More men climbed out, each one as imposing as the last. They were a diverse group, all ages and sizes, but also one in the same thanks to their hard expressions and the tense way they carried themselves. They were also all loaded down with weapons. Automatic guns, pistols strapped to waists, knives secured to legs.

  “Have you seen these guys before?” Landon asked in a low voice.

  “No.”

  I lifted myself up a little, trying to get a better look at the men, but Landon pulled me down.

  “Stay out of sight.”

  “I am,” I hissed, my focus still on the men.

  They were at the gate now, talking to our people. I couldn’t hear what was being said but it wasn’t necessary to know we were witnessing a standoff. Whoever these men were, they wanted inside.

  Our guards had their weapons up as well, but they were outnumbered and vulnerable and everyone knew it. Still, they didn’t lower their weapons, and the more time that passed, the harder my heart pounded. There were five people on duty just like there had been when Landon and I left the settlement a short time ago, with Devon at the back of the group. He was as tense as he’d been the day we went to Tipp City to loot the RVs, only the stakes were much higher now. Then we’d been worried about running into a big group of the dead, but now we had to worry about losing everything we’d built. Eight months we’d labored to set this place up, and it was safe, it was working, but these assholes were threating to take everything from us.

  No way.

  “We have to do something,” I hissed.

  “We’re a little outnumbered,” Landon said.

  He was right, but that didn’t stop me from shaking my head and saying, “I won’t just let them take my home.”

  “You don’t even know that’s what’s happening,” he pointed out, but like me, I could tell he knew these men were trouble. “We can’t hear anything.”