On Your Knees

by Liz Bradford

  “No, I’m fine. I need to do some research, and I can do that as well here as at home.” His smile faded. “Unless you want me to leave.”

  “I didn’t say that. Why don’t we go hang out in the living room?” She dried her hands.

  “That would be good. I’ll grab my computer and meet you in there.” Adam walked out the side door towards his car.

  She grabbed her school bag and went to the living room. She pulled her lesson plan book and pencil out and set them on the coffee table. She settled on the floor, and Adam came back into the house, smiled at her, and settled on the couch behind her with his laptop.

  “What are you working on?” Adam asked.

  She leaned against the couch and looked up at him. “Lesson plans. I’m trying to make them super clear should I have a bad night and need a sub without notice. I’m telling ya, not going to school is more work than just going. What about you?”

  “Research.”

  “What research?” She tilted her head and turned to see him a little better.

  He pulled his lips in like he didn’t want to answer the question. “I’m starting a clean profile of the attacker. I need a fresh look at it. We’ve been working with a seventeen-year-old profile. More research has been done since then, and we know more about him now.”

  “That doesn’t sound like fun.”

  “It’s not. I have to dive into what makes him tick and what the triggers in his life might be, to give us a clearer picture of what we’re looking for. I do find it interesting, but only in the sense that it helps me catch the bad guy.”

  They both dove into their work and kept at it in silence for quite a while. Ella finished her plans for science and realized she hadn’t heard the clacking of Adam’s keyboard in a while, so she turned. He had fallen asleep. She smiled. He was an adorable man. A chunk of his dark hair had fallen down across his forehead. She took the laptop from his hand and put it to hibernate while avoiding looking at what he had up on the screen. She closed the computer and set it on the table and grabbed a blanket from the basket by the TV. She draped the blanket over him and impulsively reached up and brushed the hair out of his face. He had been so sweet to her that morning when she had woken up in such a fright. She touched his shoulder as she turned and left the room.

  She needed more coffee. Her night had been nearly as long as his. Staying up watching a musical had been wise on one level, but it just prolonged the inevitable. She might have stayed up longer if she hadn’t noticed that Caleb had fallen asleep on the love seat. She couldn’t make him stay up all night with her. So, she had gone up to bed. But knowing that her attacker had been out there killing another woman while they had all been sitting around laughing made sleep impossible. She had taken her time getting ready for bed and sat in Carter’s car bed reading her Bible until she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer. But it wasn’t long until the dreams started. The rest of the night had been spent fighting her demons and willing herself to get some sleep.

  Caleb came in the side door from where he had been out playing with the kids again. “Hey, Adam fall asleep?”

  “Finally.”

  “That’s good.”

  “Yeah, I tried to get him to go home, but he refused.”

  Caleb nodded. “He’s worried about you.”

  “So, I see. Caleb, you said at one point that Adam was asking all the right questions.” Caleb nodded. “Do you think he really will turn to Jesus?”

  “I can’t know that, Ella.”

  “I know, but as worried as he is for me, I’m worried about him, too.”

  “Me, too. He’s been doing better this week than I’ve seen him in a long time. He hit rock bottom a couple of weeks ago, just before you came into his life again, and he is really searching in that. Have you guys had any spiritual conversations?”

  “We have, a little bit. I just hope he doesn’t take too much of this case on himself… if something were to happen to me… I just don’t know if he could handle it.”

  “Let’s not talk that way. If we have anything to do with it, nothing is going to happen to you. The best thing we can do in all of this is keep praying. We pray for Adam, that he’ll turn to Jesus. And we pray that God will keep you safe.”

  Ella nodded.

  Late Monday afternoon, Adam lifted the lid on the grill to check the burgers. Caleb came over to join him.

  “Thanks, again, for having us over today.”

  Adam flipped a burger. “My pleasure. Just seemed like it would be a more comfortable situation for Ella over going to the Captain’s house for his annual Labor Day barbecue.”

  “Definitely. She wanted to get out of the house but was not interested in hanging out with the whole squad.”

  “Can’t blame her.” Adam flipped the last burger and closed the lid. He turned and looked over to where Ella and Amelia were across the yard with the kids. “What was going on with Carter?” The boy had thrown a huge temper tantrum a few minutes ago.

  “He wanted to open the gate all by himself.”

  “Can he even reach the latch?”

  “No, but he insisted that he could do it on his own.”

  “Goofy kid.”

  “I guess they call it childish for a reason. How are you doing, Adam?”

  “I’m all right.” Adam grabbed his bottle of beer and took a swig.

  “The drinking?”

  He let out an amused snort. “Fine. I’ve got it back under control.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes.” Adam tilted his head. “The Captain gave me an ultimatum. Apparently, he didn’t like me coming to work hung over.”

  “As your partner’s husband, I’m not too impressed with that either.”

  “It’s better. I need to be at my sharpest anyway to keep Ella safe.”

  “Do you think it would be wiser to follow Jared and Becca’s example and cut it out completely?”

  “Nah, I got this.”

  The guys sat in the lawn chairs. Rusty came running over and shoved his tennis ball into Adam’s lap. He petted the dog and launched the ball across the yard.

  “Ella seems to have warmed up to you in the last week.”

  Adam’s lips turned up and his heart palpitated. “She has!”

  “I told you miracles are possible.”

  He raised an eyebrow at his friend. “Maybe. We’ll see if it goes any farther than friendship.” Rusty brought the ball back, and Adam threw it again.

  “You want it to?”

  “Uh, yeah. But I have no idea if she’ll ever be open to that.”

  The dog returned the ball again. “Will you grow tired of this boy?” The dog panted in anticipation of another chance to chase the fuzzy, green ball. “Okay, fine.” He chucked it as far as he could and still have it land in the yard. He looked back at Caleb. “I just wish she’d be open to staying here.”

  “Totally not appropriate.” He was a little louder than he needed to be.

  “Just so I could protect her.” Adam focused on Rusty who was back yet again with the ball.

  “And you’re the only one who can protect her?”

  “Well, no, I guess.” Adam clasped his hands together. “But I know I can.”

  “We’ll protect her, too. You know that.”

  “Well, yes. It’s just that…”

  “Arrogant much? You know what the Bible says about pride?”

  “Yeah, yeah. Comes right before I fall on my arrogant face, right?”

  Caleb nodded. “And ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’”

  Adam rubbed his hands on his thighs and stood. His entire body felt restless because of Caleb’s admonition. “I should get those burgers off the grill.” He turned and shoved the irritation with his friend aside. He didn’t care if Caleb was right, Adam knew he could keep Ella safe. Not that his friends couldn’t; he trusted them through and through, but he wanted to do it himself.

  Adam ran his hands through his hair Tuesday afternoon. He’
d been staring at the rolling whiteboard in the squad room and at his notes for an hour straight without making any further progress on the new profile he’d spent all weekend writing. After Ella and the Johnsons had left last night he’d stayed up and worked on the profile. It should help him figure out who to look for, or at least who to rule out. The first seventy-two hours after a murder were crucial, but despite working all Friday night, a little Saturday, all day Sunday, and a little yesterday morning, he and the other detectives didn’t even have a suspect list. This morning had been spent following up with witnesses, not that any one of them had seen anything substantial. The team had taken a late lunch and were now back at their desks. Amelia was working on paperwork, while he mulled over the profile.

  Amelia’s voice broke into his thoughts. “You do know that staring at that board won’t tell you who he is, right?”

  He shook his head at her, ignoring her question.

  She pushed back from her desk and crossed her arms. “Let’s talk through it. I want to hear what you’ve got over there. Have you managed to get in his head, yet?”

  “I wish I hadn’t. It makes me sick, Amelia. To understand his motivation just makes it even more infuriating.”

  “So, what’s his motivation?”

  “It’s not so simple, because as I look at it, I see two different profiles. One from the guy from seventeen years ago, and one is the guy from today. They are clearly the same person, but a changed person. In researching the different types of rapists, we see two different types merging and then morphing into what we have today.” He rubbed the stubble on his face that he hadn’t bothered to shave the last two days and sat up straighter in his chair. “I would say the guy from seventeen years ago falls into the power-assertive type.” Adam stood and turned the rolling white board around to the side that was blank. He picked up a marker and at the top of one half of the board he wrote “SEVENTEEN YEARS AGO” and at the other end wrote “TODAY.”

  “The differences we see are mostly in his method. Previously, he was much less controlled in his actions. Still methodical and angry, but back then he ripped their clothes off, whereas today he is taking the time to cut them off.” He wrote those things under their headings. “In the past all his victims said he was very profane, but Ava said his language was angry and hostile but not profane.”

  “That seems like a strange change,” Becca said. She and Gavin and Jared all moved towards him to listen to what he was saying.

  “I think so too, but I believe it has to do with maturity. While I still can swear with the best of ‘em, I don’t swear like a sailor like I did when I was in college.”

  “That makes sense,” Amelia said.

  “Then there’s the most obvious difference between then and now. He’s taken up killing, which throws him now into the anger-excitation type, also known as the sadistic rapist.” He wrote the types under the headings, as well. “I think back in the day we were dealing with a power-assertive with sadistic tendencies, but it’s reversed now. I’d classify him today as a sadistic rapist with power-assertive tendencies. And I wonder if those tendencies are showing more because he’s reliving the past attacks.”

  “Do you suppose he’s been out there raping and killing other women over the last seventeen years?” Jared asked.

  “Yes. That’s why I already contacted the FBI and am running his MO through the national database. I’d be surprised if it doesn’t come up in multiple places. I’d bet he goes on sprees like he did here initially and is satisfied for a while and then goes on another spree.”

  Gavin leaned forward in his chair. “That means there could very well be hundreds of victims out there.”

  “Easily. However, the other possibility is that he married and found some satisfaction in beating his wife.”

  An eerie silence fell across the room. Even the shuffling of papers by the other detectives in the squad room who were working other cases seemed to shuffle silently.

  Adam turned his attention back to the board and wrote, “KNIFE - PROP” on the first side and “KNIFE - WEAPON” on the other. “Back then the knife he carried was only used to instill fear in his victims, but now, obviously, he’s using it to kill. Those are the biggest differences between the time frames. But there is quite a bit of overlap, which is, of course, part of why we know it’s the same guy.” Adam continued to add to the board while he talked. “He’s an angry man who gets off on hurting women. The violence of the crime is part of what he enjoys, especially now. He has become increasingly violent; we’ve seen that in the last two victims alone. Clarissa was tortured for hours before he finally killed her.

  “He’s opportunistic, but also very intentional. He’s always carried what would be called a rape kit. It would include the ski mask, duct tape, his knife if he doesn’t keep that on himself at all times, along with the squirt bottle and other supplies he uses to clean his victims.”

  “So, what does that tell you about who he is?”

  Adam turned to see who had asked the question. A shiver ran down his spine as he met Scott’s eyes.

  “Quite a bit.” Adam turned his back on Scott. “By analyzing what type of rapist, he is I can tell that he is an arrogant, guy’s-guy kind of man, yet is charming and manipulative. Probably was flashy in the things he did or wore or the car he drove back then. But today probably tries to blend in a little more. He most likely works in a field dominated by men as he is likely a fairly macho kind of guy and likes to show his ‘superiority’ over women.”

  Adam absent-mindedly looked down at his watch. “Crap. It’s already three o’clock.”

  From across the room Patrick North said, “Need someone to go pick up Ella for you?”

  A shiver ran down his spine. He didn’t like that man being around Ella. It was bad enough he was married to Jocelyn, but Adam didn’t want him around Ella, too. What was he even doing in the squad room? “Nah, that’s okay.” He looked around trying to find an out. He really needed to stay as did Amelia, they were on a roll and needed to be sure everyone working this case knew what they were dealing with. Out of the corner of his eye he caught Doug Ramirez raise his hand slightly. He didn’t trust many people with Ella’s safety, but Doug fell onto that short list. “Doug said he would earlier.” He lied. Doug had said no such thing.

  “Sure did.” Doug covered him. “I’m headed out now to get her.” Doug stood and left.

  Adam pulled his phone off his belt and texted Ella. “In the middle of something, so Doug Ramirez is coming to get you and bring you to the station. C ya soon.”

  Just a moment after hitting send his phone vibrated. The text back from Ella said, “K. See you shortly.” Followed by a smiley face emoji. His heart skipped a beat. He looked forward to seeing her.

  But right now, he needed to focus so he could leave with her as soon as possible.

  “And what was his age?” Someone from the growing crowd of detectives asked.

  He jumped back in. “Based on the survivors’ testimony, which is congruent with the profile, he was in his early to mid-20s initially, which puts him pushing 40 today. That’s the other thing that changed in his MO. He was choosing victims that were near his age or slightly younger, but now age varies, but that’s because he’s trying to kill the women he attacked before and if he can’t like with Angela and Brooke, he’s taking substitutes. Ava and Clarissa both resemble the original victims, and they were both killed in the original locations. We didn’t realize that’s what happened with Ava until it happened with Clarissa, but when we looked back at it, I’m quite confident that is what’s going on.”

  “Now, wait,” Becca said, “It took us a bit to connect Kimberly’s murder with Ava’s attack because he didn’t rape Kimberly. Why?”

  “Amelia and I have a few theories on that.”

  Amelia took over from where she sat at her desk as this was the part they had talked about yesterday morning. “One possibility is that the younger vics are his type and Kimberly was out of his age range pre
ference. Another possibility is that he didn’t because he had already done that part of the ritual with her. And the last possibility we talked about was that he didn’t need to because he got off on the memory of what he did in the past since he took her to the same location where he had raped her.”

  “What a lovely thought…” Becca’s turned up nose proved she thought the opposite of what she said.

  Adam continued, “Another thing that needs to be noted is that he is becoming increasingly violent. He beat up Kimberly extensively, but it was all with his fists before he slit her throat. With Ava there were bite marks along with the beating and also several wounds from the knife. With Clarissa… well, it was incredibly violent. He raped her repeatedly, beat her, and stabbed her in multiple locations before finally slitting her throat.” Adam’s stomach churned. He hated what this man had done to these women. He had to force himself to unclench his fists.

  “And what about Ella?” Gavin asked. “He was ready to take her that one night. Do we believe he’ll try again?”

  Amelia answered, “Unfortunately, I have no doubt that he will try again, especially when you consider the note he left in blood on her wall.”

  Jared asked, “What did that note say again?”

  Amelia said, “’Sorry, I missed you. See you soon, Ella.’”

  It still made Adam’s skin crawl.

  “That’s a clear threat,” Jared said. “How are things going in keeping her safe?”

  Adam replied, “So far so good. I think we’ve kept her location outside of school a need to know basis.”

  “Good.” Jared looked at Gavin and Becca. “How about with Hillary? We are assuming he will go for her at some point too?”

  “Yes, Sarge,” Adam said before Gavin or Becca could reply to the first question.

  Gavin added, “Hillary hasn’t been quite as cooperative as Ella. She hasn’t wanted as much protection but has been willing to let one of us escort her to and from work. She’s also agreed to stay in and call us if she needs to go out for anything, but I’m not sure how much she’s really adhering to that.”

  “I’m sure Ella’s personal relationships with us helps her,” Amelia said.