by Mia Terry
Billy looked like he could cry saying those words and Ollie felt a little wet-eyed himself. “It could be you and Kris next,” he said.
Billy’s smile was wide, even as he shook his head. “Nah, not quite yet. We are saving so hard for a deposit for our own home. But that we really can do it, is cool to think about.”
Ollie knew in his bones that one day he’d be standing at Billy and Kris’s wedding, and the thought filled him with the same joy he’d felt when he’d stood there watching Luke kneel in front of Jai. That in the future he might watch the wedding alone was a little harder to bear. He’d decided his future life goals a long time ago, but it had been so nice to share in that moment today with Rhys, to have someone who looked at him to squeeze his hand and to know he’d be able to talk about it with him later.
Billy interrupted his introspection. “What has you looking so ugh all of a sudden?”
The compassion in Billy’s expression was enough for Ollie to give an honest answer. “I guess I’m feeling a little sad and sorry for myself about my single status with all the love in the air.”
“You haven’t been looking all that single in the past week,” Billy replied quickly.
Ollie forced out a chuckle and knew it didn’t sound completely natural. “A holiday romance, unfortunately, doesn’t change much about my relationship status.”
“Does it have to be a holiday romance?” Billy asked. “If you ask me, Rhys is a great guy. I get that there are a few geographical issues you might have to overcome, but couldn’t you think about trying long distance or even just schedule another holiday at least?”
That Billy seemed so genuinely bewildered was charming, but it made it even harder for Ollie to breathe. He’d categorized this relationship as a holiday romance in his head from the beginning, and Ollie wasn’t ready to think about the choices he’d have to make to see it any other way.
“No,” he said. The word was a little too loud and definite even to his own ears. “No. Long-distance hardly ever works for anyone and it wouldn’t work for me. My work is too demanding to be taking off weekends regularly and I’m probably moving overseas soon, so long-distance isn’t on the table.”
That Billy was looking rather cowed made the words he had spoken even worse to his own ears. “Sorry,” Billy said. “I didn’t know about the overseas thing. Is it a secret? Because Kris hadn’t spoken about it to me.”
“No,” said Ollie again, but this time in a much gentler voice. “I’m sorry I’m just mad at my choices today. I haven’t even discussed it with Kris, probably because I know what he’ll say to me.”
Billy looked at him, assessing him as if he were weighing up the welcome his next words would get. Billy’s hesitation caused Ollie to take a deep breath, determined to treat whatever he had to say with respect.
Finally, Billy spoke. “The thing is Ollie, I’m not trying to be clever here, but I’ve been on your dad’s yacht and I’ve heard your friend's comments. You’re rich, so you have more options than most. If you know what Kris has to say, and you don’t want to hear it, I’m guessing what he’ll say isn’t great. So it can’t be a fantastic opportunity for you, because if it was, you know he’d be happy for you, even if he missed you. So why the hell would you do any of it?”
“I don’t want to be the rich boy who can’t hold down a career,” Ollie replied. “I don’t want anyone, especially my father, to see me as a dilettante.”
“Can’t you be the man who made a mature decision about the way he wanted his career to go?”
“I just don’t feel like that option is open to me,” Ollie said, self-pity at a maximum high.
What he didn’t expect was for Billy to laugh. “Mate options are the one thing you definitely have. When I moved in with Kris, he was a stranger doing a favor for Jai, I had broken ribs, a rapidly disappearing saving account, and I knew I was going to have to appear in court so I could tell a room full of people my brother beat me up. And the thing is, even I knew enough to be grateful this didn’t happen when I was a teenager, to be grateful that the local police had believed me, and grateful that I had a skill which meant I had a job and didn’t have to be financially beholden to anyone. So, if all you’re worried about is an awkward conversation with your dad and a few pissed off people, I think you might have to rethink what exactly not having any options entails.”
When Ollie gulped at his friend not exactly sure how to reply, Billy just raised an ironic eyebrow and then raising his eyes heavenwards leaned back in his sun lounger, putting in his earphones. Ollie was left in silence, having to think about his words.
Okay, what Billy had said had partly shamed him. He knew he’d been thinking of himself as a poor little rich boy, and the fact he’d articulated that to Billy, of all people, was more than a little embarrassing. But in the end, the options Ollie could see weren’t really different. He knew he was being stubborn, but he had worked for this career for so long, how could anyone be so blasé about it being thrown away for a man.
All he could do was tap his ear and wait until Billy removed his earphones so he could reply. “You’re right,” Ollie said. “I have the privilege of options. I guess I just have to accept that I’m choosing my career out of ambition, and that probably sounds less noble than it should.”
“Whatever makes you happy,” said Billy, with a shade more irony in his voice than Ollie would have previously thought him capable of.
All Ollie could do was laugh, not too bitterly he hoped. “More and more like Kris every single day.”
Billy lay back and got himself comfortable again. “I know you don’t mean that as an unvarnished compliment, but you forget, I love the man.”
Obviously dismissed, Ollie got up and headed back inside. He’d have to remember to commiserate more with Kris when he next had a fight with his boyfriend. Ollie had previously imagined that fighting with the usually laid-back Billy would be like fighting with a kitten, but the man had a sarcastic streak that could bloody sting. That is, if he hadn’t moved to the Gulf by the time Kris next needed someone to confide in post-fight, as it didn’t happen often.
Being roughly seven time zones away would make keeping in touch with the day-to-day minutiae hard. And wasn’t that thought just another kick in the guts.
As if the cold splash of reality caused by Billy’s words hadn’t done enough damage to his mood, now he had to contemplate yet another thing he’d lose by taking the promotion. Fuck his life right now.
* * *
A few hours later, Ollie walked into the restaurant in a significantly better mood than he’d gotten himself into that afternoon. Nothing had been resolved, and he’d even napped on the couch to avoid going into the bedroom to watch Rhys sleep, but no future problems could withstand the looks of joy on Luke and Jai’s faces or even Ollie’s own thrill at walking in to a beautiful restaurant with Rhys’s arm casually wrapped around him.
When the maître d’ walked them to their table, which was situated in a private nook, all the voices in their group stopped.
“Wow,” said Jai, his voice sounding genuinely filled with emotion. “This is spectacular.”
“Well we did hear it was a special occasion for you tonight. Congratulations to the happy couple,” said the handsome maître d’. “Though you all look like such happy couples tonight.”
“Thank you,” said Ollie, only mildly discomforted by being referred to as if he was in an established couple. “Our newly engaged couple is these two.”
The maître d’ beamed in Jai and Luke’s direction, and looking at the beautiful couple you could see why. “We’ll put you two at the head of the table and we got a special delivery only half an hour ago for you, so which one of you is Jai and which one of you is Luke?”
It was only the work of seconds and Jai and Luke were placed in pride of place with two rather spectacular bouquets in front of them.
“Was this you?” Jai asked Ollie, beaming.
“No, I wish I thought of it. There is a card,
open it,” Ollie replied, intrigued. From the reviews of the place he’d expected the elaborately laid out table with crystal glassware, but the exquisite multi-colored rose arrangement in front of Jai and the red poppies in front of Luke were a genuine mystery.
Jai popped open the card attached to the vase and immediately looked misty eyed. “Oh god,” he said, looking up at Rhys. “It was your beautiful mother.”
Rhys smiled as they all sat down. “Hearing about you two getting engaged this morning made her cry and she so wanted to do something to celebrate the occasion.”
“Wow,” said Luke. Ollie couldn’t believe how wide the tough cop’s smile was over an arrangement of flowers. “You can tell her it is the first time anyone has given me flowers.”
“What about me?” asked Jai. “I get flowers for us all the time.”
“I’m sorry love, but those are pretty clearly ‘for the house flowers’ and my involvement is to be adjacent at best.”
Everyone at the table laughed including Jai. “Just for that babe, as soon as we get home, I will buy you flowers and make you take them into the station to prove to the entire world that the flowers are just for you.”
“Well, I’ll have the best-decorated desk in the force,” Luke replied. “Soon I’ll have our wedding picture to go there too.”
When Jai’s eyes really overflowed this time, Ollie had to look away, or he feared his eyes would well over too. He’d heard from Kris how hard a road self-acceptance had been for Luke, and to see him proudly talk about displaying wedding photos showed how far he’d come. Hell, the fact he’d do so within a country police station, showed how far rural Australia had come.
“Did you guys call Dave and Tom?” Kris asked.
“Absolutely. As if Tom would let us forget about it if he wasn’t the first in Dungoon to know.” Jai replied with a ready smile. “He screamed the house down and Dave managed to congratulate us much like he really meant it.”
“Hey, Dave pretending to be happy for us is as big a step as if he were actually happy for us,” Luke said, looking genuinely not bothered. “He spent most of his life expressing contempt for me, so he is trying these days. And he is trying to be a good father to Tom and that means supporting my relationship. For me, I’m just looking forward to getting a ring on Jai’s finger and hoping that’s enough for my nephew to stop looking at my husband like he is lunch.”
They all laughed at that, even Jai as he protested. “He hardly does that at all anymore.”
“Yeah right,” Luke retorted. “He almost fell off the treadmill last week, looking at your ass in compression tights.”
“Whatever,” Kris chipped in. “If you’re a gay man, you’d have to be close to death not to take a second look at Jai’s Lycra-clad ass.”
The nods of agreement around the table made Luke hold up his hands. “Okay. As a present on my special day, I need everyone to stop thinking about my fiancé’s ass right now.”
“Well, just be grateful that you are marrying someone whose ass is worth picturing,” said Billy.
“Hey, I’m filled with gratitude about that ass every single day.” Luke smirked back.
Jai put his fork to his water glass and quickly had everyone at the table looking in his direction. “Now we’ve quite finished talking about my assets. I want everyone to focus on talking about my wedding plans.”
As everyone jumped in with suggestions, Ollie looked over at Rhys and saw a shadow of sadness pass across his face. It was a lightning fast expression change that was quickly replaced by a far more socially conscious warm smile, but it occurred to Ollie that Rhys might be feeling odd, knowing he probably wouldn’t be at the wedding everyone else was debating so animatedly.
Wanting to banish any trace of discomfort from this dear man, Ollie leaned forward and said in a low voice. “It was so lovely of your parents to send the flowers tonight.”
“Are you kidding,” Rhys replied, his smile fond and genuine. “My mum would have been here with streamers if she thought it was in any way socially acceptable. She thought Jai was the loveliest man, and there might have been tears when I told her about what Luke said to him.”
“She was very sweet and generous to think about it,” Ollie said quietly, so no one else could hear. “Jai’s estranged from his parents, so I think what your parents did becomes even more meaningful to him.”
“It looks like he has his own family now,” Rhys said, gesturing to the scene in front of them. Kris was bemoaning the weddings proposed location in Dungoon in the same breath as verbalizing his intention to take a week off work so he could help with preparations. And Luke was adding in his ideas, never taking his hand off his new fiancés back.
“That he does,” said Ollie, enjoying how Rhys saw the world. There was an optimism about him that was unusual. Most of Ollie’s group thought to be anything but jaded showed a lack of sophistication, however Rhys didn’t see life in those terms. Maybe it was because Rhys had grown up with parents who had actively chosen to live a simpler life. Maybe it was because of Rhys’s personality himself. Whatever the cause, Ollie liked the sweetness in Rhys’s worldview. He liked the pleasure Rhys took in other people’s happiness.
When Ollie tuned back in to Jai’s conversation, it sounded like the wedding guest list was growing exponentially. “The whole hospital obviously,” Jai listed. “The station and really we should include the Parkes police station too, well at least everyone who is off shift.”
“I’m sure they won’t expect to be invited,” Luke said, more amused than disconcerted.
“Hey, they’re your backup,” Jai said stubbornly. “If we feed them and are nice to them at your wedding, hopefully they’ll remember that when you put in an emergency call. I want them to put in that little bit of extra effort when it comes to delivering you safely back to your husband. Anyway, the memorial hall holds a few hundred people, so we don’t have to worry about space.”
“Are we really going to have a few hundred people at our wedding?” Luke asked.
“Probably not a few hundred.” Though Jai didn’t say this with any degree of certainty. “Maybe just a hundred and fifty. We know a lot of people.”
“Babe, before you I never expected to get married. And even if the far reaches of my brain could have imagined a wedding, I’m sure any hypothetical guest list would have numbered not more than about twenty people max,” Luke said.
Jai leaned forward and put a kiss on his lips. “Yeah babe, I know. But that’s only because before you were with me you were a bit of a sad loner.”
Luke’s laugh was bright with no bitterness. “Mostly true. Though I’m still not entirely sure if inviting the entire Northern Districts police force is strictly necessary.”
The rest of the argument was lost as their waiter came back to the table and started handing out the starters and the elaborate mock-tails Ollie had pre-ordered. Though Ollie heard Kris ask if they could insist that all the police guests wear their dress uniforms.
Once everyone was eating, Jai leaned over and said to Rhys. “You must make sure to text me your address. I’ll need it to send your invitation.”
It was only because Ollie had spent so long staring at Rhys’s cheeks that he could detect the slight pinking as Rhys replied. “That’s so very sweet of you. But you don’t have to do that just because I’m here. I’m aware I’m a bit of a hanger-on tonight.”
This time it was Luke who replied. “Rubbish. We’re so glad you’re here. And we want you at the wedding. After all you were there for my proposal, so you have to see us get married.”
Ollie could see the invitation completely charmed Rhys. “Well, I’ll give you my address and if you still feel that way when you send the invitations out, I’ll only be too happy to accept.”
“You’ll get to check out Dungoon.” Billy added. “I’m not a big fan of my childhood town, but even I will enjoy the great and the good watching the town’s first gay wedding,” Billy chimed in.
He must have got a certa
in look from his boyfriend because he quickly added. “Apart from the joy of seeing you two get married as well.”
“Luckily for you, you sounded sincere with that last bit,” Jai said as he winked at Billy. “Otherwise I might have had to suggest that my best friend let you sleep on the couch tonight.”
“Which would have hurt me as much as it hurt you,” Kris chimed in, with a lingering kiss on his boyfriend’s lips.
Ollie knew that sentence was true. Actually, he knew Billy would never have slept on the couch no matter what Kris would have claimed to his best friend. From the laughter at the table, he was sure he wasn’t the only one with that opinion.
Hearing Luke debate the merits of having what sounded like the entire Northern District police force at his wedding had Ollie thinking. If he was somehow getting married tomorrow, what would be the reaction from his workplace? Ollie couldn’t imagine his stuffy bosses coming along happily to a gay wedding. They knew he was out, and it wasn’t exactly an unfriendly workplace, but they were still pretty conservative. They’d probably attend if only because of his father’s attendance but what bothered Ollie the most was that he wouldn’t want them there. Ollie really didn’t want to think too closely about what he was doing spending sixty hours of his week making this group of men significantly richer. Especially when he couldn’t even stand the idea of them pretending to celebrate something in his personal life.
Dragging himself out of that particularly depressing thought, Ollie re-engaged with the group. The celebratory mood couldn’t help but catch on. Jai and Luke were incandescent with joy, even as they teased each other, and none of the rest of them could help but be caught up with an afterglow of happiness. It didn’t hurt that the meal was delicious and the service impeccable. Even their exit from the restaurant was smooth, with the bill waived away, as Ollie had prepaid both their meal and a generous tip. Luckily Ollie had already told the others it was his treat, so he didn’t have to argue with them, or have them try to slip him cash. One of the many things Ollie liked about this group is that they never looked at him to pay the bills because of his last name. Each person, including Rhys, always tried to pay their own way. Funnily enough, it was this group of people Ollie enjoyed treating the most. He knew that unlike some of his wealthier friends—who ironically loved having people pay for them—this group watched their budget, so treating them to something had real meaning. And this beautiful restaurant, and the lovely celebratory meal they had produced for them tonight, was definitely worth sharing with these men.