The Carolyn Chronicles, Volume 1

by Derek Ciccone

  After being interviewed by police, Billy chose not to press any charges against the man. Based on the news reports, you would have thought it should be the other way around.

  He’d be the first to admit that it looked bad. A group of privileged children taunting and attacking a down-on-his-luck war hero. And talk about symbolism—a man who didn’t know where his next meal would come from, having food shoved into his face by those who eat in five-star restaurants. And since it might have been the only public incident in recent memory that wasn’t captured by video—just still photos taken from the phones of other patrons and passerbys—it was impossible to accurately depict the man’s threatening nature.

  Billy respected the hell out of this guy’s sacrifice, and would do whatever he could to get him the help he needed concerning his health, both physical and mental, but he had no regrets about protecting his children and Carolyn. And based on their actions, it seemed as if they felt the same way about him.

  Chuck was in full agreement. Even though he warned Carolyn about fighting—coming from a man who made a living winning hockey fights—he was proud of her response to a friend being in trouble.

  Dana felt the same, but she was also Billy’s business agent, and this type of bad publicity was not going to be good for the sales of “positive message” children’s books, to say the least. She spent the early evening making phone calls to important people, trying to smooth over the situation.

  There was a time when Billy would refuse to apologize if he knew he was in the right. He was the one who took the principled stand against the football powerhouse college, causing an uproar when the star quarterback chose to quit the team after the school made him choose between football and academics. So even though it felt like a different lifetime, he’d proven that he wasn’t afraid of bad press, and he certainly received his share when he spoke out against the university, including numerous death threats.

  So maybe it was maturity, or just that he was in love, but he agreed to post a written apology about his role in the incident, and take responsibility for what happened. He was starting to feel like a politician.

  Speaking of which, the predictable call came later that evening. It was Kelly, and she wasn’t happy. Not surprisingly, the focus of her concern was on the bad press, not the safety of her children. Although, she did add that, “Oliver told you to hire security guards, but you were too pigheaded, as usual.”

  He reminded her that Oliver is not the girls’ father and that would be a decision made by their parents. This would be the first real brouhaha with Kelly and LaRoche in regards to their current arrangement with the children. Billy thought it would have come much earlier.

  Kelly then handed Oliver the phone, and he started in, “Do you know how this makes me look?”

  “The man was stalking the girls, blaming you for what happened to him after the war. While I can’t say I blame the guy, his anger was misdirected, and I’m not going to sit there and let him, or anyone, threaten my daughters.”

  “I had to make tough decisions concerning the safety of this country. I stand by the decisions I made.”

  “And I had to make a tough decision today. And I stand by them.”

  “It’s a lot easier to take stands when you live on low ground—not as far to fall.”

  Billy remained composed. “He had an issue with the war, I suggested he take it up with you, and not my daughters, that’s all.”

  “The war is ancient history. I’m much more concerned that this makes me look like an unfit father.”

  Was this guy for real? “You’re not their father.”

  “Perception is reality in my business.”

  “Nobody is under any perception that you’re their father … unless,” Billy let it hang there for a moment, letting LaRoche grow uncomfortable.

  “Unless what?”

  “Unless you plan to run for high office again, and you’re trying to position yourself as Mr. Family. That’s it, isn’t it?”

  Radio silence, before, “What did they tell you?”

  “I don’t discuss conversations between me and my children with outsiders.”

  And for the first time Billy saw the positives of what happened today. Carolyn and the twins showed great loyalty, a characteristic that will likely help them throughout their lives. Alan Gaughan had finally been heard and was getting attention for an issue that most people wanted to sweep under the rug, including a certain former senator. And best of all, the horrifying thought of an Oliver LaRoche presidency had taken a major hit. Billy could hear it in his voice.

  Kelly recaptured the phone and demanded she talk to the girls, who were now likely in trouble for giving away state secrets. They had Billy’s back earlier today and he would have their’s tonight, informing Kelly that they were unavailable at the moment. “I’ll pass along your concern for their safety,” he said and hung up.

  Annie and Maddie were out in the yard with Carolyn and their award-winning dogs, catching fireflies—one of Carolyn’s favorite summer activities. A rare constant in her likes and dislikes over the past year.

  They eventually returned inside the house and collapsed on the couch in what has become known as the Downstairs Room—some call it the Great Room, others the Living Room Area—announcing that they were pooped. The adults traded glances—they didn’t know such a thing was possible. Even an offer to watch a movie was rebuffed, as they preferred to go to bed. There would be no cease in the miracles tonight.

  The twins sleeping-quarters had been moved to Billy and Dana’s cottage. It was a tight fit, but a better alternative than the no-sleep slumber parties that took place when they stayed with Carolyn in her room. They asked Dana to come with them and tuck them in. They had grown fond of her, but then again, who wasn’t fond of Dana?

  Fresh off of working the phones to save Billy’s career, she morphed into a motherly mode and walked the girls to the cottage.

  Normally, Billy would read to Carolyn, before Chuck would be called in to tuck her in. But tonight, and it wasn’t the first time, she asked for Lindsey. Chuck couldn’t help but smile—whatever happened over Memorial Day weekend between the two of them seemed to have really worked—and Billy could practically see the relief leave Chuck’s shoulders since that relationship had taken a turn in the right direction.

  Lindsey looked surprised, as she always did when Carolyn called upon her. Carolyn then took her hand and led her up the spiral staircase to the balcony that hung over the Downstairs Room, and then the two of them disappeared into Carolyn’s bedroom.

  “I think we should tell her Ryan’s coming,” Chuck suddenly said.

  “But we’ve held out this long, why not let him surprise her when he arrives tomorrow?”

  “Because I think she’ll be too amped up. You know how she gets—she’ll be running around in circles for the rest of the day, jumping off staircases. This way, she will have the whole night to digest it—maybe use up some of that energy in anticipation. Like at Christmas.”

  Billy shrugged. “It’s your call.”

  “I know it is—I just wanted your opinion.”

  Billy started to laugh. “I don’t think there’s ever a right answer with Carolyn … she’s one of a kind. Like a giant map of uncharted territory.”

  “I guess that makes us explorers.”

  “Maybe we’ll get a holiday named after us. It worked for Columbus—he didn’t know what he was doing either.”

  Chuck joined Billy in laughter. “She really laid the wood to that guy today, huh?”

  “Like she was shot out of a cannon. The poor guy had seen the horrors of war, but hadn’t seen anything like Carolyn.”

  His laughter slowed. “For the record, we oppose her behavior and don’t condone it in any way.”

  “Absolutely,” Billy said, looking up toward the balcony. “It’s a good teaching moment.”

  “What will she learn from it?”

  “Carolyn? Absolutely nothing. But everyone else might take note no
t to mess with her friends.”

  Chuck nodded a proud smile and followed Billy’s glance to the balcony. “What do you think they’re talking about up there?”

  “No idea, but having the two women in your life gang up can’t be good news for you.”

  Chuck kept smiling. “Actually, it’s very good news.”

  Approximately ten minutes later, Carolyn returned, again holding Lindsey’s hand.

  “So what’s going on?” Chuck asked.

  “We can’t tell you—it’s a surprise,” Carolyn said.

  “We have a surprise for you too.”

  Billy expected excitement and pleading to puh-leez tell her. But she just calmly said, “Ryan’s coming, I know.”

  “How do you know? Did someone tell you?” Chuck shot suspicious looks at Billy and Lindsey, who both threw up their hands to say it wasn’t them. And then Dana, who had reentered the room after completing her tucking-in duties. She also denied it.

  “I just know stuff sometimes,” Carolyn said with a shrug.

  Chapter 30

  Morning came early. If you could really call it morning. It was more that gray area between night and day that only hipster club-goers and morning DJs know exists.

  But here Billy was with Chuck, and their neighbor, the insufferable Hawk, on a road trip to the city before the sun had even risen.

  With all the farms in Connecticut, Billy really didn’t get why Chuck was so insistent on traveling to the Bronx to get the pig for today’s party … a party Billy wouldn’t even get to attend to enjoy the fruits of, or in this case, the roasted pork of his labor. Chuck’s friend, a guy named Joey Ahmed, owned a butcher shop in the Bronx that supposedly sold the “perfect” pig.

  When Billy made the faux pas of implying that a pig was a pig, he was lectured about Joey’s special marinade that included the perfect blend of garlic, beer, and heavy salts, mixed with a light brown sugar. And how he stuffed it with a combination of apples, fennel, and onions. Since pig roasting was in Chuck’s wheelhouse, Billy wouldn’t question the logic. His choice to bring Hawk along, and his non-stop obnoxious chatter, was another story.

  By the time they returned to New Canaan, the sun had risen on what was expected to be a glorious day for the Fourth of July holiday. The three men unloaded the seventy-pound pig, and hooked it to Chuck’s homemade pig roaster/smoker. It would take around six to eight hours to cook.

  Billy thought the sight of the dead pig might cause the kids anguish and lead to some Charlotte’s Web flashbacks, but Maddie and Anna seemed energized by its arrival. Anna first had to make sure it wasn’t Miss Piggy, and looked to Billy with relief. Billy smiled at her, as if to tell her that his word will always be true with her.

  Maddie made oink-oink sounds at the pig and was proud to be the one to place the apple in its mouth prior to the cooking. If the Kleins could see them now, he thought. In a few short weeks they’d gone from haughty-taughty to piggly-wiggly. That was, when they weren’t showing off their ass-kicking skills on the nightly news.

  But someone was missing from this party. Carolyn was known for her ability to sleep as hard as she lived. She had to store up all that energy that she used each day. So it wasn’t unusual for it to be a struggle to get her out of bed and off to school. But it was different on weekends, holidays, and whenever Maddie and Anna were here. She was usually the first one up, raring to go.

  Billy wondered if maybe she couldn’t sleep last night, knowing that Ryan would be coming, and it caught up with her this morning. Regardless, he thought it best to check on her. He started out in her bedroom, where everything looked to be in order, except one thing—no Carolyn. She’d been known to start out in the big, lonely room, showing off her independence, only to retreat during the night to the more cozy living room, or Chuck’s room. But she wasn’t in either room.

  His next thought was that she was attending to Nails, but he found him on the property, hanging with his new buds, Ronald and Reagan—no Carolyn. He checked the pool—nothing. The cottage—empty. He thought that maybe she might be burning off some stored-up energy in the cul-de-sac that was attached to the property, riding her bike. Again, no sign of her.

  By the time he returned to main house he’d started to worry. He found Dana and Lindsey standing outside chatting and drinking orange juice. He asked them if they’d seen Carolyn, and they hadn’t. He explained that he’d looked for her and couldn’t find her anywhere. They agreed it was strange for her not to find her way to the center of excitement, which right now was the pig’s arrival.

  They decided to team up to search for her, but without telling Chuck. Once a rogue military group like Operation Anesthesia attempts to kidnap your daughter you tend to get a little paranoid when she goes missing. Even if this wasn’t an uncommon occurrence, and normally turned out to it be false alarms like the hospital escape.

  “Have you checked the gravesite?” Dana asked

  Billy hadn’t thought of that—Carolyn’s mother was buried on the property, and she would sometimes visit her.

  “I’ll check there, you keep Chuck occupied,” Dana said.

  But before she had a chance, a girl’s voice shouted out, “Ready or not, here I come!”

  They turned to see Carolyn step out of the house. “Oh shit,” Dana said.

  “Double shit,” Lindsey added.

  They immediately built a human-wall around Carolyn to make sure Chuck couldn’t get a glimpse of her. Luckily, both he and Hawk’s full attention was on the pig.

  Dana crouched down to look Carolyn in the eye, and took a soft approach, “What did you do, sweetie?”

  “Ryan’s coming, so I decided to cut off my hair since he lost his. His teammates did it, and me and him are like teammates.”

  The answer left a lump in their throats, but that couldn’t mitigate the disaster that was before them.

  They caught a break, in that she wasn’t able to shave her head. She had cut off one ponytail at a jagged angle with scissors, but the one on the other side of her head remained intact. She had chopped off her bangs and some of the hair on top, making it look like she had a receding hairline. There were random cuts throughout, reminding Billy of the old joke after a bad haircut—did you get into a fight with a lawn mower?

  “Keep Chuck busy,” was all Dana said, as she and Lindsey rushed Carolyn into the house. He heard Dana say, “I think it looks good, but let me help you fix it up a little,” before the door shut behind them.

  It didn’t take them long—less than twenty minutes—and at first sight, Billy considered it the greatest disaster cleanup since Chernobyl. Dana and Lindsey had transformed her remaining hair into a cute pixie cut, using strategically placed barrettes and flowers to cover some of the bald spots.

  “Daddy—look at my new hair,” she exclaimed as she ran to him.

  He looked at her, and then to Dana. “Shouldn’t I have been consulted on this?”

  “It’s not really your thing, so I made an executive decision,” Dana said, and Lindsey nodded in agreement.

  “Not saying your wrong, but it would make me feel more like a capable parent if you’d run it by me anyway, eh.”

  “Why you sad, bro?” the portly Hawk came up behind Chuck. “It starts with the hair, and next thing you know you’re picking out prom dresses together. Count your lucky stars.”

  “What do you think of my hair, Hawk?” Carolyn asked.

  “I was wondering what happened to my weed-wacker. And what’s with chicks and short hair? I tell my wife all the time—cut it off, and I’ll divorce ya.”

  “I’m surprised she hasn’t taken you up on that,” Dana said, then added, “She happened to cut her hair for a good cause—to honor her friend Ryan, who lost his hair to chemotherapy.”

  “Carolyn’s going to marry Ryan,” Maddie started in again. Once she found a way to get under your skin, she didn’t let up. Billy could tell this would be the focus of most of his fatherly lectures this summer.

  “I’m not, stop lyi
ng, Maddie,” Carolyn proved an easy mark once again.

  “I thought you were going to marry my boy, Little Hawk. What—now that you’re famous, you’re too good for him?”

  She looked quizzically at Hawk. “I never said that.”

  “She’s painless, not tasteless,” Dana got in the last word.

  Dana then took Billy by the arm and led them in the direction of their cottage, “Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to go get changed for the party.”

  “Enjoy it now, Harper,” Hawk shouted to them as they walked away. “Once you get hitched the party will come to an end, real soon.”

  That’s what worried him.

  Chapter 31

  Billy and Dana returned to the cottage, showered—together, to show the party was still going strong—and then changed into their outfits for the Boulanger party.

  Dana slipped on a body-hugging, spaghetti-strapped red white and blue sundress. Her hair was pulled back into a long ponytail.

  Billy couldn’t help but stare at the dress. “That might be the most patriotic thing I’ve ever seen.”

  She smiled at him. “And you look like a handsome man of leisure.”

  “I feel like Thurston Howell III. All I need is the ascot and the straw hat.”

  “More like Thurston’s hot son, who bides his time waiting to take over the family business by entertaining supermodels on his yacht.”

  They kissed, and were about to pick up where they left off in the shower, but Dana slammed the brakes. “We’re going to be late as it is.”

  “We can be fashionably late,” he said with a wicked smile. “I hear it’s your thing.”

  “We’re not guests, we are hosting the party. We need to be there to greet the arrivals.”

  Billy was going to mention that she was the host, while he was, and always would be, considered a guest in the Boulanger world—and an unwelcome one at that—but he went with discretion over valor.