Merry Wrath Mysteries Boxed Set Volume III (Books 7-9)

by Leslie Langtry

  All in all, I had to congratulate us for pulling this off in one night. Sure, the giant chicken wire skull would've been amazing, but this worked.

  We were finally starting to move when someone slammed into me from behind.

  "Hey!" Kelly shouted.

  I turned around and saw Disco Mummy from the Dad's Club float.

  "Sorry, ma'am," a high-pitched falsetto voice that sounded like a cartoon character said. "It's hard to see where I'm going."

  "No problem," I mumbled. "You should probably get back to your float."

  He ran to the back of the line, and Kelly looked me over. "Are you okay?"

  "I'm fine." I brushed off my sleeves. The mummy had transferred dust from his costume onto me when he bumped me.

  We turned back to the float, running to catch up. The float hit the streets, and I saw hundreds of kids lined up with bags, waiting for their candy tribute.

  The girls on the ground kept busy, running off to the sides and handing out candy. We'd been warned not to throw it if we could help it because the committee in charge didn't want maimed children on the news. After seeing the Cub Scouts throwing rocks at each other, I could understand why.

  The girls on the float posed and waved, lightly tossing candy when they could. We seemed to be well received, and on more than one occasion, someone shouted, "Go Girl Scouts!" It was nice to be loved. But then, who doesn't love the Girl Scouts?

  After two blocks, the girls started running up to us for more candy. They were going through the treats faster than I thought, and I suspected some of them were eating them. Every now and then, one of the walking girls would bring a bucket from our little monsters on the float. This nice teamwork made me proud. Maybe I should take them all out for pizza afterwards. They certainly deserved it.

  Trying to keep an eye on things was nearly impossible. I wished I'd involved Dr. Body. Soo Jin helped with my troop every now and then. We could sure use her now. After filling five more buckets of candy, the need waned, and I visually counted. All were present and accounted for. Losing a girl during this parade would be humiliating. I didn't need to hand my downfall to Juliette Dowd. Oh…and losing a girl would be bad…

  The monsters on the float were fun to watch. The werewolf was swinging her poodle skirt, which she punctuated with candy tosses and twirling. I'd have to watch Hannah. She could get dizzy and fall off.

  Inez as the hippie vampire was holding up her hands in peace signs when she wasn't doling out candy. For a brief moment she looked a little like Richard Nixon. If Nixon had been a hippie and a vampire, that is.

  Ava, the 1980s Jane Fonda witch, was doing some sort of aerobics, using the hay bale as a step. Kelly ran over and stopped her. I know I couldn't do that without falling off. When Kelly walked back to join me, Ava started doing pushups.

  Kaitlyn, the ghost in the leisure suit, was still sitting. The ghost sheet tucked into her suit had holes for the eyes, but I'd made them small, and it was probably tough for her to see. I didn't blame her for sitting this out.

  "Mrs. Wrath!" Two of the Kaitlyns were holding up empty buckets.

  "Great job, ladies!" I scooped the buckets into the large bag.

  "Yeah," one of them said. "But Kaitlyn isn't handing out candy."

  For a second I wondered who they were talking about. Having four Kaitlyn Ms who looked alike wasn't easy.

  "Where is she?" I scanned the group for the only other Kaitlyn walking. She should've been easy to pick out. There she was, over at the right edge, handing a little girl a piece of chocolate.

  "Yes, she is." I pointed her out to the two walking with me.

  The shook their heads in unison, which was more than a little creepy. "Not Kaitlyn!" they said at the same time. "Kaitlyn!" The girls pointed at the ghost on the stage.

  My cell went off, vibrating hard.

  "It's okay," I mumbled to the girls as I pulled my cell from my pocket. "I'm sure her costume makes it hard for her to see well. Go hand out candy."

  Reaching into my jacket pocket, I found my cell. Nothing. After a few seconds of walking while patting myself down (which I don't recommend doing if you wish to stay upright), I found a cell in my other pocket. Where had this phone come from?

  The screen lit up with a warning. Give us the gold coins, or the little girl gets it!

  That wasn't good.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  I swallowed hard as I examined the cell. This phone was cheap. Like the burner phones I used to use on the job. How did it get into my pocket? Examining my jacket, I spotted a bit of dust outside the pocket.

  The Disco Mummy! He must have planted the cell when he slammed into me! I hazarded a glance back at the other float, but because it was head on and the monsters faced out on the sides, I couldn't see him.

  What did the text mean? What little girl? I did another head count, but all of the kids were present and accounted for. Whoever sent this was bluffing. But why even attempt that? He'd have to know I'd count the girls immediately. It wasn't a very good threat. Even if he had one of my girls, how could he expect me to get the coins from here?

  Maybe it was a joke? Halloween brought out the weirdos. It wasn't a very good joke. But the mention of the gold coins meant it wasn't a prank. Only the thieves, Rex, my mother, and Kelly knew about them. And not one of them would've talked.

  If the threat was real, did they really have one of my Scouts? This time, I studied each girl as I counted them. The girls on the ground were dressed the same, but their faces weren't blocked by a mask. Each of those girls was where they should be. That left the girls on the float.

  They seemed okay. Each one was doing what they had been doing—dancing, pushups, peace signs, and sitting.

  My eyes narrowed in on Kaitlyn in her ghost and leisure suit costume. Alarm bells started to sound in my head. The suit, which had been oversize before, now seemed to fit. And unless she'd gained a hundred pounds or so in the last twenty minutes, this wasn't Kaitlyn.

  I fought the urge to run up to the float and drag the pretender off. Maybe beat him within an inch of his life. And even though my troop would love that, it probably wouldn't be a good idea at a public family event. Even with my fiancé as a policeman, I'd probably end up with jail time.

  I texted back. If you hurt her, I will hunt you down and kill you. Slowly.

  The response came back immediately. We won't touch her if you do what we ask.

  We? Was the imposter on the float part of We, or were there more than that?

  I tried to delay. I don't have them with me! Why would I bring them to the parade?

  There was no response for a few seconds. As if these guys hadn't thought of that.

  You'd better find a way to get them before the parade ends, or it's curtains for Kaitlyn!

  Curtains? Had we slipped through a wormhole, back to the 1920s? Seriously, who said "curtains" these days?

  It didn't matter. If they were serious, then I was running out of time.

  I replied, I'll try. How do I get them to you?

  This was a stalling tactic. I didn't have the coins. Rex did. He probably took them to the station as soon as I gave them to him.

  This time, the response was quick. In seven blocks, you're going to walk over to an adult clown standing in front of the Quickie Mart. Hand him the coins as if you were handing out candy. The girl will be waiting for you at the end of the parade.

  I only had seven blocks to figure this out. How was I going to pull that off?

  How do I know I can trust you? I asked.

  If you do what we ask, the girl will be where we say she will be…unharmed. Tell no one. If we see you talking to someone about this, it'll be too late for the kid.

  There were no further messages. I've been in danger before. I've helped other adults in situations like these. But this time it was a child. A child who trusted me and liked setting fires and made me laugh. When this was over, I was going to kill these guys.

  There was no time to waste. I noted the block
we were on and started counting as I scanned the crowd, looking for Rex. The Disco Mummy was behind me somewhere. If he saw me texting, would he assume I was involving the police? It was too risky. Even calling Kelly over to me was a risk. I had to assume that Disco Mummy could see all.

  Was it my imagination, or was the parade moving faster? We were hitting the second block. I was running out of time. It was an impossible mission considering I didn't have the coins. These guys were idiots to think I had millions of dollars in Mesopotamian gold on me. Why would I carry them? After I killed these guys, I was going to lecture them on being idiots.

  One of the Kaitlyns and Caterina came up to me to fill their buckets.

  Which gave me a small window of opportunity. "Can you guys do me a favor? It's a secret favor."

  The girls nodded eagerly.

  "I need you to get one of the other girls to ask Kelly for more candy. She also has to bring one of the other girls to ask me to fill up at the same time. Got it?"

  "Got it!" Kaitlyn nodded.

  The two girls went over to Betty and Lauren and, with a discretion I could only consider professional, told them what to do. Both girls still had a lot of candy in their buckets but immediately tossed huge handfuls to the crowd.

  We were on block three and closing in on block number four.

  Betty came running over to me just as Lauren ran up to Kelly. I'd only have a few seconds to do this right. Lingering too long would make Disco Mummy suspicious. We were well behind whoever was disguised as the missing girl. He wouldn't hear us.

  "Kelly," I said without looking at her. I secretly broke the handle on Betty's bucket and was making a big show of repairing it. "Do not react. Act like everything's okay. Kaitlyn on the float has been kidnapped."

  Betty's and Lauren's eyes grew wide.

  "Girls," I said as I snapped the handle back into place. "Not a word to anyone. I need you to go back to the route. Stay behind the guy dressed as Kaitlyn on the float. If you see Rex, I want you to run over and hug him. It shouldn't look suspicious." I slid the phone into Betty's bucket. They'd have to find a way to get it to Lauren if Rex was on her side of the street, but I knew they could pull it off. "Then, give him this phone and tell him to read the texts."

  The girls nodded and ran off to take up positions, one on either side of the street.

  "I'm going to kill whoever did this," Kelly seethed.

  "Me too," I said as I scanned the crowd.

  One of the kidnappers was behind me wearing a costume. There had to be others. It's not easy to search for faces in the crowd without looking like you're doing just that. It's a skill I acquired in my CIA field agent training. The trick is to move your eyes, not your head.

  The people who lined the route were the normal, run-of-the-mill candy junkies. But then, a professional would do their best to blend in. Unless they wanted you to notice them. A flash of auburn on my right turned my attention to a sneering face. Darlene Haver. As far as I knew, she didn't have children. And yet here she was. Making eye contact.

  She scowled as my eyes locked on hers. Then she grinned. A very spooky grin. Was she in on this? My original theory was that she may have murdered Didi but wasn't in on the coin theft. I didn't really see any connection. But maybe she was behind it all. I mean, if you're going to commit murder, you wouldn't turn your nose up at stealing.

  A child squealed on my left, and I jumped. When I looked back, Darlene Haver was gone. I shouldn't have reacted in any way. My skills were getting a little rusty.

  "Laugh out loud," I told my co-leader. "One of them is on that Dad's Club float, and someone might be in the crowd. They're probably watching."

  Kelly threw back her head and laughed loudly. "What are we going to do? How many blocks do we have left?"

  "Three," I groaned. "I have no idea. The coins are at the police station. If we don't see Rex, and I'm pretty sure that would take a miracle, we'll have to have another plan."

  "In a few blocks?" Kelly asked. "Even you're not that good."

  I would've protested, but she was right. Even at the top of my game, I would have had doubts.

  "Here's what we know. There are three or four of them. One on the float behind us, one on our float, one dressed like a clown, and one who has Kaitlyn. That's almost more than I can take on single-handedly."

  Betty turned to look back at me. We were heading toward the second to last block, and she looked angry. No sign of Rex, but even if we did see him, he'd never make it in time. I needed to act. Fast.

  Betty looked around the crowd. I had a bad feeling Rex was behind us or gone completely. Then she took off running, disappearing around the float in front of us.

  "Betty!" I shouted and gave Kelly a little nod. She understood and took off after the girl. To anyone on the street, it looked like a kid just running off and a leader trying to catch her.

  A terrible screeching came from the front of the parade as Kelly walked Betty back to us.

  The parade came to a stop as Kelly brought the girl to me.

  "She sabotaged one of the floats up ahead." Kelly was trying hard not to smile. This was unlike her because she really liked rules and safety. "She bought us some time."

  I shook my finger at the girl, hoping it looked like I was scolding her. "Great job, kiddo! Now go tell the others to just stand by until we get moving again."

  Betty ran off, and we watched as she went from girl to girl, whispering to them as she made a show of pointing to the stopped float ahead. The girls acted as though this was the end of the parade, and more than one of them dumped their whole buckets in front of kids. This made it so they all had to come back to get more.

  "We know," the other Kaitlyn said with a wink.

  "How do we help?" Lauren asked.

  Kelly and I slowly filled up each bucket as we told the girls what had happened. The three girls and one imposter on the float had no idea what was going on and just sat on their hay bales.

  "I don't know yet." We were stopped a block and a half away from the clown. "Has anyone seen Detective Ferguson?"

  The girls shook their heads. Okay. I needed to find something else.

  A siren blared from behind us. An ambulance drove slowly up and around us, toward whatever had happened.

  "What did you do?" I hissed at Betty. Please don't let her have killed someone.

  "My brother's on the float I sabotaged. I told him to fake a heart attack. He jumped off and started flopping in the street."

  Huh. That was pretty good. It would give us a longer window.

  "You have a brother?" I asked.

  Betty shrugged.

  "What are we going to do?" Kelly asked.

  An idea formed in my head.

  "You need to run to the ambulance and try to help," I said. "Shout something as you pass the guy on the float, like I'm a nurse!" Then when you get up there, call Rex and tell him about the clown and Disco Mummy. He needs to bring the coins to me. Go!"

  Kelly did just as she was told, and I was particularly impressed with her acting ability as she ran past the kidnapper on the float, shouting over and over that she was an emergency room nurse.

  "Ladies, take your places," I ordered as I walked around the flatbed.

  I went from one girl to the other, loudly explaining that this was just a temporary setback. I approached the float and went from girl to girl, calmly explaining that Kelly had gone to help and we'd be moving soon so just stay where they were.

  When I got to the imposter, I hissed in his ear. "Kaitlyn had better be alright, or I'm going to tear you to pieces. Get it?" It took all I had not to tear his throat out. I should admit that I've never done this, but I had seen Roadhouse about fifty times, so how hard could it be?

  He nodded but said nothing. I returned to the back of the float. Lauren came over to stand with me. It was some comfort.

  The girls stood where they were, waiting, while I scanned the crowd. Any minute now, the ambulance would take off and we'd be moving again.

&nbs
p; Something glinted at the edge of the crowd. Rex was standing back, aiming a mirror at my face. Wow! He took a page from the spy handbook! I whispered something to Lauren, and she ran up to the crowd a few feet before Rex and started personally handing out candy. The other girls saw her and started doing the same. We now had eight girls on one side of the street, giving everyone a piece of chocolate. For a moment I thought the jig would be up.

  Lauren kept working the crowd until she passed by Rex. Then she made a major performance of acting as if her bucket was empty and ran back to me.

  A small leather bag sat inside her bucket. I don't know how he managed it so quickly, but I gave a silent thanks for my fiancé. I slipped it into my pocket and filled the bucket, handing it back to the girl. She nodded and ran back to her place next to the float. The other girls, seeing her do this, took up their normal positions on each side of the float and went back to tossing candy to the crowd.

  The bag was heavy and clinked. Using my body to shield what I was doing, I opened it and pulled out a note. Rex was going to find the clown and shadow him. Officer Kevin Dooley would be at the end of the parade, ready for…what? A donut explosion? A cheese puff catastrophe?

  Kelly rejoined me. "Man, Betty's brother can act! They're taking him away now. I guess Betty also sabotaged the truck pulling the float. It's fixed now. Any news from Rex?"

  I told her what happened, and she visibly relaxed.

  "How did Betty sabotage the truck?"

  Kelly grimaced. "She wouldn't say because of something called 'plausible deniability.' It looked messy. If I had to hazard a guess, I'd say a large quantity of chocolate was involved."

  As we walked the length of the last block, I kept my eyes open for the clown.

  He was easy to spot. There wasn't a single adult in costume near him. That seemed like an error in judgment. It didn't matter because he made it easier for me. The man was wearing full greasepaint and a large wig. The costume was big and loose. It could be anyone under there.

  At this point, Disco Mummy didn't need a show. My going over to the clown was what he'd wanted. I was done with these games. So, I walked over to the man I would be killing in the near future and stared at him.