Gods of Shadow and Flame

by M. H. Johnson

  Jessica. A name with such strong, mixed emotions. Friend. Shieldsister. Lover. Sweet and luscious in her arms for almost the entirety of her time in Faerie, enraptured as they had both been with their Fey lovers, and with each other. How many times had she gazed into those adorable amber eyes? So delightfully wicked as she brought Rulia to unspeakable heights of ecstasy, and unbearably innocent, gazing so tenderly at Rulia as she ravished Jess in turn, both of them finding such sweet happiness in each other's arms.

  That wild, carefree girl, so full of passion and life, yet so devoted as well to her cause. To rescue a school full of students that had hated her, no matter the abuse she had suffered at the hands of vindictive disciplinarians, and mocking students both. Rulia was guilty of all too many daydreams involving the pair of them running off to live out all the rest of their days in sweetest bliss, perhaps even pick out a handsome, open-minded man they both could share and raise a vast, loving, beautiful family together as they did in the far south. It was a captivating fantasy that had near consumed Rulia the moment she had awoken from Faerie, that desire to be with Jess and leave the viciousness of this world and all its troubles far behind.

  But Jess, it seemed, would not wake up. For all their ministrations, the melancholy gazes of Jess's family broke Rulia's heart, leaving her increasingly certain that the strain of her lover's final adventure had been too much, and Jess was ready to pass on to the next world.

  And Rulia’s own nation could not afford her selfish indulgence any longer. With a bittersweet kiss farewell upon a comatose Jessica’s cheek, Rulia had hesitated no longer in making her way back to the VonBurg estates, and from there homeward bound, where treachery and peril had followed her ever since, for all that she risked her very life in defense of her beloved home.

  Rulia's sigh was melancholy, lost in sweetest reminiscence, for all that she knew that some things could never be. She turned to gaze upon the drained faces of her companion's, Julien appearing less like the noble fop he put on such airs as being, their struggles having reformed his body into the lean, whipcord build Rulia knew all too well was strong as oak and deadly quick. She would not be at all surprised if he astounded his school entire with his swordsmanship when next he returned. Increased strength, endurance, and heightened reflexes in warding against the unexpected had been their boons, even as they endured the hardships of their journey. And Rulia would be the first to admit that as challenging as it had been, it almost seemed as if the forest itself had blessed them, with food and shelter always manifesting when they needed it most, and the worrisome voices of occasional patrols would fade away with cries of frustration and confusion as their would-be interceptors wandered off, the forest itself seeming to lead those men astray, even when Rulia and her band left the heart of the primeval forest for sparser groves as they steadily made their way towards the academy, humbly grateful that so much of Erovering was covered with woodland of one sort or another.

  Lord Killen alone seemed the worse for wear, though he too was lean and strong with the physical demands of their journey. His cheeks were downright hollow, and his features gray with exhaustion. His hair as well had lost its luster, further evidence of the toll his body had been forced to endure. Rulia sighed with sudden pity for her beloved friend and spymaster, for all that she knew they had been incredibly lucky thus far.

  "Thank you, Jess, wherever your soul may be. May you rest fully and deep, and know much happiness in your next life." Rulia smiled then, wiping away a sudden tear, somehow convinced that it had indeed been Jess's spirit she had sensed from time to time, seeming almost to communicate with her, warn her of danger, even caress her cheek. It would not surprise Rulia in the least to find that somehow Jess's spirit itself had soothed the very woods into gentle submission, to ease her one-time lover's passage as Rulia did what she must, in order to avert what would be a catastrophic war that would result in the utter destruction of her home, her kingdom, and very possibly the death of her entire family.

  And somehow, for all that they had been raised upon opposite sides of the Dragonspire Range with all its divided loyalties and vicious history, Jess, spirit that she may be, still cared enough to aid Rulia on this, very likely her last mission and the one that would bring Rulia's family succor, even as the world entire seemed ready to descend into madness.

  “You have my love, Jessica. Wherever you are. And I swear to you, neither you nor yours will suffer by my hand for the boon you grant me, helping me to save my own family from peril.”

  Even as she whispered her prayers, Julien chuckled with relieved mirth, stumbling upon the most perfect pine to shelter the night under, as overcast clouds covered the last of the brilliant night sky, and with efficiency born of long practice, the three quickly set up their nests of pine leaves and cloaks, sinking into a sleep as deep and restful as that experienced by any lord nestled deep in cottony sheets upon the plushest of beds.

  "My lady?" Having discreetly brushed away all traces of their camp the next morning, Lord Killen politely interrupted Rulia's melancholic reverie, even as she gazed forlornly at the clear blue sky. "You were saying something about risking a sojourn into the nearby town?" Lips pressed firmly together, her spymaster gave a brooding shake of his head. "I took the liberty of doing some early morning reconnaissance, to orient myself to old trails far closer to the great road than the strange paths we travel now, and I recognize the town of which you speak. I would caution most stridently against this course of action, my lady. Said town happens to be full of enemy agents. Some are no doubt in disguise, and a pair were blatantly obvious to any with the slightest experience in the games we play, and each and every one of them dangerous opponents, I am sure. They are obviously expecting or investigating trouble of some sort, and I dare not even risk alerting my resources in this area to find out what. The risks are just too great, for them, and for us as well."

  Rulia grimaced. "Damn it all. You are right, Killen. Our safest bet, really, is to stay as close to the truth as possible. I, Rulia, desperate to return, terrified of running into the wrong people upon the borderlands where my estates are located, am presently seeking shelter and succor at my old school, even as the lands around my home descend into madness, my family's estates for all intents and purposes under siege from bandits hired by Erovering's enemies. Thank the gods I have all the proper paperwork, so the veracity of those claims, at least, is irrefutable. And such would explain our weary, ragged appearance. But damn it all! None of us are so foolish as to underestimate the power of coming in from a position of strength and confidence."

  Lord Killen sighed. “Quite correct, my lady, on all points. At the very least, we can excuse our unorthodox approach as a matter of practicality, in light of how very much warmer it is in the heart of the forest, than exposed to the howling northern winds upon the plains and high roads of Erovering.”

  Julien nodded. "It is striking how much more pleasant it is in the heart of the deepwood. Perhaps it is because the trees block that icy wind. Do they also give off heat? I never thought to inquire, before. Whatever the reason, cold as it still is, it beats the icy horror of traveling the main roads. Frankly, I'm surprised we haven't encountered any number of travelers also making their way through the deepwood, what with how many sheltering pines and hidden nooks of nuts and other forest bounty we have come across. Yet we have not seen a single soul traveling through these forests since we began our sojourn."

  Rulia shook her head, grinning at the madness of it all. "And as a result, we look far more like trappers than a noble lady and her entourage! What I would give for something so basic as a nice bath and a change of clothes, by the gods!" Her companions joined her in weary laughter, shaking their heads with darkest mirth and exhaustion, at least finding comfort in how their struggles nonetheless managed to strengthen bonds of fellowship and loyalty, close as kin to her heart.

  Rulia. Hurry. You don’t have much time.

  “Killen, what did you say?” Rulia blinked in sudden confusion.
>
  Killen looked at her oddly. "We said nothing, my lady. What did you hear?"

  Rulia hissed softly and shivered, looking carefully all about her. She grimaced, girding herself with a deep breath. “I think we need to press on. Our situation may be more perilous than I thought.”

  “Bloody hells,” Julien hissed. Not for the first time. Then, “By all the gods!” His voice, almost a shout, immediately wilted to a whisper after the first syllable, Rulia reflexively squeezing his shoulder and covering his mouth, all three utterly still. If there were patrols or such, no one seemed to have heard.

  Yet oddly, Rulia could hear something. Something unexpected. Potentially delightful. “Julien?”

  "'Tis not sorrow, but salvation!" Julien whispered. "Look yonder, dearest Rulia. Do you see, through the trees up ahead? It looks to be a glade of some sort. And if I am not mistaken, I hear what sounds like the babble of a brook. Mayhap we can bathe after all?"

  Carefully clamping down upon her excitement, Rulia gave a slow nod, all three approaching carefully, weapons at the ready. So far all they had found were still pools strained by root systems, water always utterly pristine and more than sufficient to quench their thirst, but never was there enough water for cleaning.

  Cautiously, they peered around the large trunks before them, to gaze carefully within the small glade.

  "By the Goddess!" Lord Killen whispered. "It's almost as if that girl is expecting us."

  “But how could anyone know? Curse and damnation, is it a trap!” Julien hissed. “Should we flee, Rulia?”

  Rulia was utterly speechless. Blinking madly, she desperately tried to make sense of what she saw. Her heart started to hammer.

  Before them stood a tiny woodland clearing, and they were not alone. Dappled sunlight caressed a girl’s skyblue dress matching so perfectly her gentle gaze, shafts from high above alighting in brilliant flame as they danced upon locks of hair so lush they glimmered like spun gold.

  It was Jessica. Here. For all that golden blond hair and eyes such a piercing blue had replaced rich crimson locks and an adventurer’s fierce amber gaze, there could be no doubt. Her heart's flame was waiting for her.

  Even as Rulia gazed on in speechless wonder, the vision of beauty gestured with a calm wave to the packet of what, yes, looked to be carefully prepared clothes before nodding at the utterly clear waters of the small spring before them.

  "By all that's foul, this must be a trap!" Lord Killen's voice was fierce with barely contained nervous fury, hand instantly curling upon what Rulia knew could only be war blades, deadly spinning triangles of steel, exorbitant in cost to manufacture, practical only against a lightly armored foe, but exceptionally deadly against enemy agents armored for intrigue, not war. Rulia's hand clamped down on Killen's concealed wrist. Hard. Her loyal spymaster hissed in pain and uncertainty both. "Commander!"

  “Elonia!” Julien’s voice was caught between exhaustion and panic, uncertainty and hope, hand spasming against the intricate swept hilt of his blade.

  “Hold!” Rulia’s voice came out as a short, curt bark, one that brooked no insubordination. The voice and tone of one born to rule.

  "I'm sorry... Rulia, are you sure this is wise?" Julien all but pleaded, even as Rulia slowly made her way into the clearing, staring in awe and wonder at a smiling Jessica de Calenbry, her gentle gaze easing away all of Rulia's fears, for all that she knew she was in terrible danger if the girl she loved betrayed her.

  “Jessica.” Her voice, little more than a whisper. Jessica smiled.

  “It is good to see you in the flesh once more, my dear Rulia. Or Elonia, if you like.” A teasing smile.

  Rulia felt her cheeks flush as a waves of awkwardness and desire both flooded through her. To know her secrets were bare before the one she gazed upon, to realize how much she ached, even now, to hold this smiling princess of her heart tightly against her chest, to kiss her deeply, and never let her go.

  Rulia blinked, feeling her heart race, doing her utmost to keep a clear head, the utter focus needed for the perilous rites she must perform.

  “She knows!” Lord Killen hissed. “It is not safe here, my lady. Please! We must leave, at once.”

  Jess blinked, tilting her head curiously, speaking in that soft voice that sent shivers of sweet need for what Rulia was painfully certain she would never have again. Jess. Stroking her, feeling her softly press against Rulia as she laughed throatily, their lips locked tightly once more in the heat of their mutual passion.

  Rulia blinked away the bittersweet memory, chuckling softly to herself, even as Jess captivated her heart once more with her heavenly gaze.

  “By the gods, Jess. It is good to see you. Please tell me you’re not here to betray or stop us. I swear whether I lived or died, the blow to my heart would kill me.”

  Jess smiled gently, gesturing once more to the pool. “I dream about you sometimes,” Jess said, freezing Rulia where she stood.

  “I’ve had so many dreams, of late, and worried for you terribly each time you came upon perilous forks in the road of your destiny.” Her smile then. So warm, so full of hope, inspiring tears of relief for an anxiety Rulia hadn’t even known was weighing against her heart. Quickly, fiercely, she blinked them away, possessed of a sudden daring hope.

  “Jessica. Oh by the gods, Jessica! Was it you? Were you the one who saved me? Who saved us?”

  Jess smiled softly. “I did but give you warning there in the keep. It was you who saved you against hired assassin and treacherous turncoat both. And may I say, my beautiful warrior princess, you have only gotten better with your buckler and blade.”

  Rulia hissed, suddenly terrified Jess understood. Everything. “Jessica. Please.” Her voice cracked, speechless with a terrible anxiety. Knowing, just knowing, Lord Killen was the barest heartbeat from acting.

  "Please." Jess gestured once more to the pristine pool before them. "Tell your spymaster to put down his throwing blade. You are safe in these woods as long as I am with you, and we have only so much time before the Royal Guard changes their shift." Jess's gentle gaze locked upon Rulia's own. "Please, Rulia. Trust me on this, as you have every time you have felt the forest reveal its hidden secrets, guiding you safely from peril, taking you out of harm's way."

  Julien's voice had fallen to a reverential whisper. "By Justice, it is true, isn't it? We have heard tales of your wondrous garden, even in Velheim. And not all of us, my lady, have forgotten the old tales, the ways of Druids, far older than the present empires of man would have us believe, doing all they can to stamp out all mystery cults with the advent of the elementalist tradition."

  On shaking hands and knees, he bowed low before Jess. “You really are the goddess of all things wild, are you not, Lady Jessica de Calenbry? Brought before us by the angels above, to guide us in our time of need?”

  Jess gazed quizzically at her friend. “Rulia?”

  Lord Killen smacked his lover upon the back of his head.

  "You are being an idiot, Julien," the spymaster declared with some asperity, before turning his apologetic gaze upon Jess. "My apologies, Lady Calenbry. Our dear lad here has obviously taken a shine to one of the many mystery cults that all too many universities seem to possess a plethora of, filled with jaded students of means who somehow gain access to old tomes of one sort or another and dream up all sorts of legends and tales to add some excitement to their lives.”

  Jess laughed softly. "No worries, Lord Killen. My friends and I had much the same sort of affair going on at my old college, all seven of us hellbent on finding new and exciting understandings of how the universe worked; forgotten secrets, hidden lore, that sort of thing." Jess shrugged then, her face lighting up with that bemused smile which Rulia found so adorable. "To tell you the truth, we mostly just used it as an excuse for late night gossip and as a discrete location to seduce our lovers."

  She laughed at their shocked expressions. “Oh, rest assured, the students of Highrock are no saints, and we needed something to let
off all our steam after training in endless sparring sessions and mock battles that all too well mimicked the hell of war. Some of my peers, in fact, even went to class.”

  Her gaze turned thoughtful. "Interestingly enough, we actually did manage to uncover a number of ancient tomes and quite a few Guild accounts that read more like fables than exotic explorations, yet the accounts were so fantastic, it inspired a couple of us to wonder if there was something to the ancient art of Delving, as perilous a route to power as it was purported to be, for all that any number of nobles, until very recently, wanted to believe it was all some staged performance, complete with poppy extract and drugged wine." Her expression turned solemn. "Everyone knows that for most hungry souls chasing mirages of wonder it ends in little more than exasperated disappointment. An artist might chase a creative muse that he later realizes was no great insight, or a traveler might spy a distant palace, sparkling like a golden jewel, the sound of trumpets, song, and revelry just barely heard, to approach at a mad gallop only to find the ruins of ancient fortress by the lake, the caw of birds and the rustle of the wind the only sounds to be heard."

  Jess chuckled ruefully. "It was only later that we learned how dangerous a game we were playing. For just as some dreamers awaken with a headache, laughing at their silly muse from the night before, other seekers of hidden ways into the realms of Shadow and darkest dream end up crushed to nothingness, their very souls unable to take the unbearable pressure of the hideous forces saturating those odd realms of Shadow that lie between our dimension and whatever else lies beyond."