On Ice, A Hockey Romance

by Trisha Harley McCarthy

“Austin, you punch like a pussy,” Lonergan goaded Flynn.

  I groaned.

  Teri interjected, “Take it outside, now, before I kick both your rookie asses out with a hand tied behind my back,” she added the latter under her breath. Both men scowled at her. I chuckled. Teri had bigger balls than any of us.

  After they had left, Teri looked at me and winked, “You have a visitor.”

  Teri opened the door and my jaw dropped.

  Chapter 19

  Ki

  Cami sashayed into the room with a wide smile on her face. “Hello, Ki. I heard you woke up. I’m so glad.” Joining me by the bed, her eyes swept over me.

  “If I were you, I’d take a hike before Zoe comes back.” I was bluffing of course, but she didn’t know that. I tried to sit up, however, the pain from my stitches and the meds they’d pumped me full of made it difficult to shift and maneuver. Cami’s mere presence affected the monitors that showed my elevated respiration and heart rate. On top of feeling like shit, my worst nightmare had to show up in the flesh.

  “You mean your wife in the psych ward?” Cami scoffed.

  My eyes betrayed my surprise. How did she know so much about Zoe and her condition? Her knowledge left a sinking feeling in my gut. Panic began to set in when my thoughts tracked to Zoe and our child, and how I had no idea what was truly going on. I had been waiting on Flynn to brief me.

  Cami had a wicked glint in her eyes. It didn’t bode well for me, laying in this bed, powerless to fight for myself. I inched my finger toward the call button to alert a nurse. Fuck, I was so weak I could barely lift my head from the pillow. I was nothing except a helpless weakling at her mercy. I glanced toward the glass door and prayed I could get someone’s attention before something happened. Cami’s sudden appearance unnerved me. Every time I moved; my entire body ached to the point where it became hard to breathe. I grabbed the bedrail to steady myself and waited for the pain to subside. My side was on fire. I winced when I ran my hand over the bandage covering my incision.

  Cami leaned into me and whispered filthy things in my ear then nipped it hard. I jerked my head away from her. She laughed at my feeble efforts. She began to unbutton her shirt, exposing her breasts. I looked away in disgust. Grabbing my hand, she placed it on her tit. I tore myself off her body as if she was hellfire itself. Her touch was repulsive, enough to make my skin crawl. Was this how women felt when they were being molested? It was a dirty, shameful feeling that I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy. How had I ever found this woman even remotely appealing? She was seriously disturbed, detached from reality.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?” My voice was barely above a hoarse whisper.

  Her smile was nothing more than a sneer, giving her a harsh and warped appearance. I knew I was in trouble. This chick was coming unhinged right before my eyes.

  “What the fuck?” I scowled at her and began pressing the call button repeatedly. This bitch was literally crazy.

  “Come on, Ki. I know you like a little pain with pleasure, or did Jesse lie to me about how you like it rough?” She leaned her slender body into me and began to stroke my dick underneath my hospital gown. My body responded to her touch, much to my disgust. I couldn’t believe this was happening. Where the hell was everybody?

  “Get the fuck away from me,” I hissed.

  I tried to grab her hand to prevent her from touching me again, however, the effort zapped all my strength. Holy shit, this woman was molesting me, and I didn’t have it in me to stop her. Her touch was getting me hard against my will. I struggled to shift away from Cami, who squeezed my balls even harder. I grunted in pain. The next thing I knew, her lips were grinding against mine, pinning me in place. I tried to turn my head away as she continued to pry open my mouth and stick her tongue down my throat. At some point, I gave in since I didn’t have it in me to resist. It was too much effort.

  “Get the fuck off me,” I tried to shout to no avail. Even my voice failed me. It was too hoarse and raspy from that fucking tube. No one would be able to hear me. Luckily, a nurse should show up any minute. I had pushed the call button enough times.

  “I love it when you groan, Ki,” Cami whispered against my cheek while she continued to stroke me. Her eyes bored into me like those of a hungry predator moments away from consuming its prey. She pressed her lips against mine again. I attempted to move my head away from her. It was no use. She released my cock and used both hands to keep my head in place while violating me with her mouth. I was hard as fuck and disgusted with my body’s betrayal. The exertion made me nauseated. Sweat beaded on my forehead and chest. I laid back and shut my eyes, willing the sick feeling to pass. I wanted to escape from this living nightmare. Relief flooded me when I heard the nurse’s voice. Thank fuck. I’d never been more grateful to see anyone in my life as I was to see Terri at that moment.

  “Mr. Connery?” Terri’s voice caused Cami to jump and move away from me.

  “He attacked me,” Cami pointed at me and began to sob with tears streaming down her face. Her blonde hair was in disarray, her lipstick smeared, and her blouse unbuttoned. I saw my handprint on her skin where she had squeezed my hand over her left breast. All damning evidence to someone entering my room and coming upon the scene of Cami crying and disheveled.

  I shuddered to think of the consequences if Cami went public with her bogus claims. I was so fucked, not to mention that I risked being labeled a sex offender. The possible ramifications made my head swim. Who was going to believe a two hundred- and twenty-five-pound hockey player had been sexually assaulted? We had a reputation for being violent brawlers. It wasn’t that far a stretch to assume I’d be capable of committing a violent crime against a woman. The notion I was a victim sounded ludicrous, even to me. I was so fucked it wasn’t even funny. Cami would play the victim and life as I knew it would be over. I thought of Zoe and our child and the life I would never know with them. It felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest. The pain was unbearable and palpable like a living, breathing thing, consuming me whole.

  Terri’s eyes widened with alarm at Cami’s accusation. “That’s not how I saw it.” Terri confronted Cami, who took a step back from the fury in the nurse’s eyes. “What actually happened is I witnessed you assaulting my patient. I saw you with my own eyes and heard everything. Your story won’t hold water.” Terri nodded toward the camera mounted in the opposite corner of the room. “It’s all caught on video in case you thought you could say it was my word against yours. You’re a sick person attacking a defenseless patient. Looks like you’re fucked.”

  Terri approached me and started checking the wires. “Are you okay?” Concern filled her round face as she performed her cursory check. My vitals slowly returned to normal.

  I gave her a grateful look. She squeezed my hand. I simply nodded. My eyes glistened with tears, since I was unable to form a coherent thought. Damn, I didn’t want to lose it in front of Cami of all people, who was now sobbing uncontrollably sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed. My life had literally flashed right before my eyes. Thank god for Terry showing up when she did.

  Terri pinned a stare at Cami. “By the way, whoever you are, security is waiting for you outside. I also called the police.”

  “Ki, I’m going to give you something to sleep.” Terri injected a sedative into my IV.

  Its effects were immediate. My eyes closed as my body swam in a sea of medication, lulling me into a deep sleep. The last thing I saw was security escorting Cami Adams from my room.

  Zoe

  I was laying on my side in a bed, staring at a blank wall and wearing nothing but a cotton hospital gown. The room was bare save for the single bed and a disgusting stainless-steel toilet in the corner. The walls were painted white with only one, small window, fitted with metal bars. I had lost all track of time. I had no idea if it had simply been a few hours or days. My despair over Ki and the helplessness inside of me had landed me in the psych ward. My breakdown scared even me. I recalled little of
the episode outside of Flynn carrying me out of a bathroom covered in blood. I’d racked my brain trying to piece together the fleeting images and events that occurred prior to some shrink admitting me for observation. The shameful truth was I just wanted to give up. Without Ki, nothing made sense. I knew my thoughts were wandering into dangerous territory. Rationally, I should have fought and not given up. My heart just ached too much. My life didn’t work without Ki. Not even the child growing inside me could help me see reason. As scary as that possibility seemed, it also offered a solution to the pain that wouldn’t subside and had burned deep down into my soul. I closed my eyes and willed God to take me. A tear slipped down my cheek as I prayed to end this suffering. I closed my eyes and slipped away into oblivion.

  “Zoe,” a voice broke through my haze. Someone nudged me awake. My eyes fluttered open and focused on two people hovering over me. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust to the low lighting in the room. It must’ve been evening given the darkness. I recognized my dad staring at me. He turned and spoke to someone. The heaviness in my eyes beckoned me back to the black cocoon that shielded me from the cruel world I still found myself occupying. My pleas had fallen on deaf ears.

  “Zo, I need you to wake up.” Flynn coaxed me awake.

  I opened my eyes and focused on Flynn sitting alongside my dad on the edge of the narrow bed. My dad took my hand and squeezed it gently. The gesture unleashed a torrent of emotions welling up in me. The ache in my chest constricted my throat. I had no words to describe the feelings I was willing to keep at bay. I liked feeling numb. It was easier to deal with than the infinite pain which radiated to every area of my body and soul. A place I was all alone and without Ki.

  “Leave me alone.” I turned away from them.

  “Zoe, Ki is awake and asking for you,” my dad said softly.

  My mind took a minute to register what my dad had just told me. This must be some kind of dream or a cruel joke to get me to respond. Yet a flicker of hope began to grow inside me. Was it possible that my dad was telling the truth? I was still hesitant and turned to Flynn for confirmation.

  “I was there when he woke up.” Flynn smiled through glassy eyes.

  “It’s true then?”

  “It’s true, Tinkerbell.” My dad pulled me into a tight hug, and I clung to him, weeping uncontrollably against his chest. I poured out all heartache and emotional turmoil I’d kept inside for what seemed like eons. The truth took a hold of me and filled me profoundly, soothing over me like a healing balm. I could finally breathe again.

  “He is going to be okay,” Flynn confirmed. He rubbed my shoulder. “Everything is going to be okay, Zo.”

  I latched onto those words like a lifeline. My eyes closed for a minute, relishing the news. “When can I see him?”

  “You have to be released first before you can see Ki.” My father’s response was a jolt back to reality. I was in the psych ward. They all thought I had tried to hurt myself. The worst part was I wasn’t sure if I had or not. I remembered only bits and pieces of my time in Ki’s bathroom. I also recalled the hopelessness and anguish that had engulfed me. It reminded me how I had let hope escape along with my will to live. I now saw the fallacy of my actions—something I would have to live with for the rest of my days. Would my father or Flynn ever be able to look at me again and wonder if I was capable of self-harm? The thought sent a shiver up my spine. I felt like I’d been pulled from the threshold of hell only to be thrust back to its very edge.

  “I’m not going to lie to you, Zoe. You’re going to need to seek help. Flynn found you in Ki’s bathroom covered in blood from a broken glass. Were you really trying to hurt yourself?” My father’s voice cracked with emotion.

  “I only remember bits and pieces.” I lowered my head in shame.

  Something deep inside me shifted. It was funny how life could change on a dime, with moments that were imbedded in your mind forever and shook your faith to its very core. When Ki had collapsed after the game, that was when my life had become a metaphor for testing my faith. It was a test I had failed miserably. Now I had to live with the consequences. What would Ki think once he found out? I shuddered at the thought of that conversation.

  “How long have I been in here?”

  “A few hours,” Flynn responded.

  “Does Ki know I’m here?”

  “He knows you were taken to the maternity ward but nothing more. I just left him a few minutes ago. I told him I would let him know how you were doing.”

  My heart began to race. “What are you going to tell him?”

  “What else? The truth, Zoe. There have been too many secrets as it is. He deserves to know.”

  “Daddy, what am I going to do?” Tears filled my eyes.

  “I promise you we will get through this, Tinkerbell,” my father said and kissed my temple.

  My dad hugged me close. I eased up for the first time since Ki had been hospitalized. Somehow, I knew everything was going to be all right. It just had to.

  Chapter 20

  Ki

  The lull of the ocean pulled me into state of relaxation I hadn’t felt in ages. My sunglasses shielded my eyes from the bright sun hovering above, warming my skin in the late summer sunshine. I’d finally recuperated, and my body had fully healed from the surgery I’d had nearly three months ago. Now I was back to working out. The rest of the time, I was soaking up the sights and sounds of the Capitola while getting a tan and unwinding from my hectic life back in San Jose. The small seaside town was the perfect getaway. It was a short drive over the hill through the Santa Cruz mountains to the coast. Whenever I reached our little summer rental, I entered a different head space. It was a world filled with peace and contentment as Zoe and I were settling in as a married couple. It had only taken us four years to get here. After all the heartache and separation, we had finally arrived at the life we deserved—where nothing or no one could touch us. Capitola was our little oasis away from the organization and a place where Zoe could rest for the remainder of her pregnancy.

  I shifted on the chaise longue and listened to the soothing calls of the gulls gliding on the wind currents above. I looked out at the expansive Pacific Ocean and knew I was exactly where I needed to be. The here and now was what mattered the most. Facing a life-threatening health crisis had a way of putting things into perspective. Hockey, fame, and all of its trappings were nothing, but meaningless facades compared to lying next to the love of your life and contemplating your impending fatherhood. If you were to ask me about what had happened in my life the last three months, I would tell you I had no idea what you would be talking about. My dreams told another story. I remembered vague bits and pieces yet nothing definitive. The one thing I did know was that Cami Adams had paid me a visit in the hospital, and I didn’t remember a thing. I only knew what I’d been told. And the truth had shocked me. I had been molested by Cami Adams. I had been totally out of it, and I didn’t remember Cami sneaking into my room or the actual event itself. As fucked up as this seemed, maybe it was a good thing. Who could even fathom a petite woman assaulting a man my caliber? I guessed it was more common than I was led to believe. Either way, Zoe would never hear about it, ever, if I could possibly help it. Jed had miraculously kept the entire incident out of the press. He had also ensured Cami’s plea deal with the district attorney remained under wraps. She was now serving time at a mental health facility near Sacramento. After her stalking tendencies and video evidence of my assault, the Santa Clara County DA compelled the judge to have Cami committed. Cami eventually got diagnosed with a sexual addiction called paraphilic disorder. She suffered from inability to control her sexual tendencies, impulses, or crossing boundaries of any sexual activity. The audiovisual evidence from the hospital had sealed that deal. Cami had pled guilty with extenuating circumstances. The extenuating circumstances being sexual assault on an incapacitated patient. In other words, I couldn’t defend myself against my attacker.

  I shook off those dark thoughts and lost mys
elf in the view. I was going to enjoy this extended weekend while it lasted before I reported for my new job on Monday morning. Jed had promoted me to new general manager after the doctor told me I could no longer play hockey. The news had come as a bitter pill, but at least my career had ended on a high with our team securing the cup. From now on, I would give it my all behind the scenes, with Zoe by my side. The team backed me up too, pleased that one of their own would be looking after their wellbeing.

  Of course, most of us were still reeling from Joe’s sudden departure. Zoe was beside herself when she learned the news. Joe was like family to her, and for him to leave without a word stung. Only Jed and the legal team knew more, but they were tight-lipped. That Joe’s loss was my gain left something of a hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach. Something told me this was only the tip of the iceberg.

  “Ki, why are you frowning?”

  Zoe’s soft voice reached me as she stretched out beside me on the adjacent chaise. Her hair was pulled up in a ponytail and her face was free of make-up, tanned from the long hours in the sun. She looked positively glowing in her black bikini that proudly showed off her protruding belly. She smiled at me from behind her sunglasses as she placed her hand on her belly. It was a sight I could watch forever. Thank god I had my angel back.

  “I was just thinking about my new job, angel.”

  I reached for her hand and kissed her knuckles. The radio played softly in the background. The only thing that interrupted this perfect moment were the circumstances surrounding Joe. I just knew deep down he was in serious trouble. I wanted to help but how did you help someone who had disappeared without a trace?

  “You mean being my new boss?” she teased.

  “As a matter of fact, no. I was thinking about Joe. Something isn’t sitting right with me,” I admitted.

  “It can’t be good. I’ve been thinking the same thing. If dad is not saying a word, it must be bad. I can’t wrap my brain around it. What could Joe possibly have done? I mean, this is the guy who stepped up for me when my own father didn’t. Does that sound like someone who could do anything wrong? I wish there was a way to help. But he’s up and disappeared. Joe isn’t answering his phone or texts. I’m really worried. I even stopped by his house the other day, but the place looked empty.”