Her expression turned fierce and she reared back and swung her arm.
And somehow managed to trip and fall.
“Skye, come on. You can’t be this bad at this. It’s like you’re not even trying.”
When she stood up, she glared at him and he knew this was going to be the one. She was going to hit the bag and stay standing up. He went to steady the bag when she punched him in the arm. Hard.
“Ow! What the hell?”
“I do not appreciate you mocking me!” she said, stomping her food to accentuate her point.
“That wasn’t mocking; that was encouraging. And it was no different from what you were doing for me. Teamwork, Skye. It’s all about teamwork.”
“Ugh…this is the worst. And now I’m not even remembering the mean clients because now I’m mad at you!”
“Whatever it takes to get that aggression out. Come on! Do it again!” He held the bag firmly. “And this time, hit the bag and not me.”
“Whatever.” This time she did hit the bag several times and she kept going with tiny little punches, but he saw how hard she was concentrating and felt really proud of her. When she stopped, she was breathless.
Then she smiled.
“Oh, my God! That was amazing! My arms feel like spaghetti, but wow! What a rush!”
Nodding, he agreed. “Okay, my turn again.”
“Do you need me to yell at you again?” she asked with a sly grin as she walked over to the wall.
“Um…maybe. Just…not so insulting this time, okay?”
“Deal.”
For an hour, they took turns and Elliott had to admit that he definitely felt good by the time they called it quits. It wasn’t a permanent fix, but a step in the right direction.
Together they walked up to his kitchen and he grabbed two bottles of water. It took several minutes for either of them to talk.
“Thank you,” he said.
“For what?”
“For coming over and helping me. I think I still need to talk through some stuff, but…this definitely helped.”
“I’m glad, Elliott. And for what it’s worth, I think you’re going to be fine.”
“I know, but I did come to several conclusions.”
“Oh? Like what?”
“Like…I guess I don’t really need an embargo because…I’m done.”
“Done?”
He nodded. “Yeah. I’m done with all of it. Clearly I’m not cut out to be in a relationship and the thought of going there again and getting hurt is just beyond unappealing.”
“O-kay,” she said slowly. “But you mean just for the…you know…year, right?”
Now he shook his head. “Nope. As in forever. I can’t do it anymore and I don’t really want to.”
“Now you’re just lashing out. Once you calm down…”
“Oh, I’m calm. We all have our strengths and weaknesses,” he explained, “and relationships are definitely not a strength for me so…I’m done.”
“Um…”
“This is a good thing. Really.”
“But you said you still need to talk through some stuff. I thought you meant…”
“I mean, I guess I still want to know why I was clinging to this illusion of having to fall in love and get married for so long.” Then he shrugged. “But I’m seeing that it’s not in the cards for me. I should take after my sister and just be okay with being alone.”
“Josie’s not alone. Not really.”
“She doesn’t get serious in any of her relationships. She’s very practical and doesn’t get emotionally involved. So that’s what I’m going to do.”
“I don’t think it’s that easy to just change your entire way of thinking, Elliott.”
“That’s what my focus is going to be.”
“Then I can’t…”
“No, I get it. I’m not asking you to help me with that. If anything, I just like hanging out and talking with you because…you get me. And even you have to admit my life’s been a bit of a shit show for a while.”
“I wouldn’t say that. Not exactly.”
“On a personal level, it has and everyone knows it.” He paused and finished his water. “So how about this–we still meet up once a week but to do things like this where we talk, hang out, and either do some more kickboxing…”
“We never did get to the kicking…”
“Or find some other activities to get out some aggression.”
She studied him for a minute. “Elliott, don’t take this the wrong way, but…don’t you have some…you know…guy friends you can do this with?”
“I do, but…they’re all still being a little weird with me and that’s getting old. Everyone thinks if I go out and get laid that everything will be alright and while it’s not the worst idea, it’s not the solution to everything.”
All she did was nod.
“So, what do you say? You up to helping me out for a couple of weeks?” And then he held his breath and hoped she’d say yes because he really needed a friend he could relax with right now.
“I guess we can try…”
He never let her finish. Hugging her close, he thanked her and already couldn’t wait to find something for them to do next week.
Chapter 5
You can lead a heart to love, but you can’t make it fall in.
Unknown
“You want me to what?”
“You throw it.”
“Are you crazy?” Skye cried, several weeks later. “Elliott, you have witnessed how freaking uncoordinated I am! Why would you suggest we throw axes?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. It seemed like a great way to get out a little more…”
“Aggression. Yes, I know. You keep saying that.”
“Then why did you ask?”
Rolling her eyes, Skye questioned her own sanity. Not only was it crazy to keep hanging out with Elliott like this because, if anything, she was getting more attracted to him, but the activities he picked were just way out of her comfort zone.
“Maybe next week I can pick where we go, huh?” And before he could answer, she said, “Or maybe we can go and sit in your living room, order a pizza, and have a normal conversation about how you’re doing.”
“You said you didn’t want to go that route with the whole therapist thing,” he reminded her.
“I know, but I also know that I can’t keep up with things like this. Are you sure you’re not ready to do this with the guys yet?”
“I’ve seen them, but it’s still all about them encouraging me to hook up with someone as a way of moving on.” He shrugged. “I’m just not interested. I’ve said it before and I’ll keep on saying it; I’m done. My family was right and I wish they had all spoken up sooner because I’m finding that I’m much happier being single.”
“Oh, well…that’s good,” she murmured, staring at the axe again. “Great, actually. Good for you.”
He nodded. “I think so too. It’s just all so freeing! I’m finally doing stuff for myself and I realized just how much energy it took to be in a relationship! It’s like a giant weight has been lifted off of my shoulders!”
“Yeah, great.”
“So come on. Let’s do this!” He stood on the allotted spot and stared at the target. “You ready?”
“How about I just watch you? I’ve had a very mellow week and have no absolutely no aggression to get out. I think all of our activities cured me.”
With a patient smile, he faced her. “You’ve done great these past few weeks! Come on, admit it. You enjoyed the shooting range last week.”
It had been fun to shoot the targets once she stopped jumping at the sound of the gun firing. Elliott even took a picture of her in the classic Charlie’s Angels pose.
“And the batting range was fun, too.”
“Um…no, and I still have the bruises to prove it.”
“You wouldn’t have those bruises if you kept your eyes open,” he teased.
“A baseball was flying at my f
ace at ninety miles an hour, Elliott!”
“Okay, okay, okay. You’ve been a real trooper; I’ll admit it. But I really want you to try this. Please! For me…”
“Oh, knock it off,” she huffed. “We both know I’m never going to get anywhere near that target and with my luck, I’m going to end up going to the emergency room because I’ve hit myself with the axe.”
“That’s why I’m going to help you,” he said, stepping behind her.
Like…really close behind her.
Skye felt like Elliott was pressed against her back from shoulder to toe. He gently gripped the hand that was holding the axe. “Okay, you need to relax,” he began.
Yeah, that was not going to happen…
One large hand rested on her hip while the other guided her through the motions of how to throw the axe. His breath was warm on her cheek as he talked her through what he expected her to do, and it took everything she had not to fall into a puddle at his feet.
“You got this, Skylar,” he said softly, and it always made her feel good when he used her full name. It was a silly thing, but for some reason, she loved it.
Her eyes squeezed shut as she raised her arm over her head. With her heart pounding, she said a silent prayer that she wasn’t going to hurt anyone and could just…get this over with.
“Open those eyes, brave girl, and think about something that’s really pissing you off,” he coaxed. “Something or someone that’s got you so frustrated and angry that you just want to hit it with something.”
It was as if Elliott’s face appeared on the target, and Skye heaved the axe with all her might.
And surprisingly, she hit the target.
“Oh, my God! I did it! I really did it!” And before she could truly process it, Elliott had her in his arms spinning her around.
“I knew you could do it!” he said, hugging her tight. “Good for you!”
She was getting dizzy both from the spinning and being in his arms, but she never let it show. When he placed her back on her feet, he was smiling down at her with pride.
“I can’t believe I really did it,” she said giddily. “Now it’s your turn. If I can hit the target, anyone can.”
With a nod, Elliott turned and picked his axe back up and got into position. He raised his arm slowly and grinned at her. “Bet I can do it with my eyes closed,” he said, oozing confidence.
“I bet you can too!”
Elliott closed his eyes and threw the axe.
And completely missed the target.
And the wall it was mounted on.
“What?!” he cried. “That’s not possible!” Angrily, he grabbed another axe, got back into position, and threw it.
Missing it again.
A string of curses were out of his mouth and Skye had to stifle a laugh.
For his third throw, he seemed to calm down, and this time he barely nicked the target. “That’s it! This is stupid! I’m not doing it again!” He stormed away and Skye had to chase him down.
“Elliott, come on! Don’t be like that.”
He turned on her. “How is it that you were able to get it and I can’t?”
“Um…for starters…wow,” she said with a hint of annoyance. “And maybe because I’m not as arrogant as you, I was able to actually focus.”
Staring down at her, she could tell he was still really angry and all she could do was smile up at him.
“And really, can’t you just give me this one? You totally kicked my butt at every other activity.”
That seemed to do the trick because he raked a hand through his hair and seemed to relax. “Yeah, okay.”
“How about this–we go and sit over in the concession area and talk for a little while and then we’ll go and try again. Okay?”
He nodded and she led him over to the snack bar where they each ordered a salted pretzel and a drink. Skye waited until they were seated at a table in the corner before she started talking.
“So,” she began cautiously. “How are you doing?”
“Right now, I’m pissed.”
“That’s not what I meant and you know it. I’m talking about overall. Are you still thinking all relationships are bad and embracing the embargo?”
He let out a small snort. “Every time I hear that word, it gets to me. And honestly, it’s the best thing my family could have done for me. So yeah, I’m embracing it and feeling really good about my future.”
That was…a little shocking. “You’re thinking about the future?”
“Absolutely,” he said around another bite of pretzel. “The way I see it–and I know it’s a cliché–but the world truly is my oyster! I’m going to travel where I want, probably sell my house and move into something a little smaller, and I’ll probably do the same with my car and get something sportier. I’ve been so damn practical and boring for years that I’m really looking forward to embracing bachelor life.”
“How is that possible?” she blurted out before she could stop herself. “A month ago, you were the poster boy for wanting to get married and have kids and a dog! You’re the guy who proposed to four different women in your quest to achieve your goal of having the American dream! And now you’re telling me it’s as easy as flipping a switch?!”
And yeah, Skye realized her voice was getting louder and she was sounding a bit like a crazy person, but…she couldn’t seem to help it.
For years, she had to sit back and watch Elliott fall in love over and over and over and never with her. And she compared every guy she dated during that time to Elliott, because she wanted everything Elliott did! And now she was left wondering if he ever truly wanted to get married or he thought he was supposed to want it because of his family!
“Geez, lighten up,” he said, frowning. “I don’t know why you sound so upset about it. I would think you’d be happy that I’m moving on.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to argue that she wished he didn’t keep going to such extremes because not all women were like Tracy.
Or the other three.
Hell, she wanted to yell that she wasn’t like them and demand that he see her!
But she didn’t.
“I…I am,” she said, focusing on ripping off a piece of her pretzel. “I just want you to be sure about how you feel and that you’re not just…reacting. I get that you’ve been burned, but…there is a woman out there who isn’t going to do that to you.” She couldn’t meet his eyes as she said it, so she had no idea how he was reacting until he snorted and then laughed.
“Somehow, I greatly doubt that.”
And we’re getting nowhere…
They ate in companionable silence for several minutes before Skye stood up. “Come on. Let’s go throw some axes.” And this time, she didn’t need his encouragement. Right now she was frustrated enough to throw the damn things completely on her own.
For the better part of the week, Skye’s words played over and over in his mind.
“How is that possible? A month ago, you were the poster boy for wanting to get married and have kids and a dog! You’re the guy that has proposed to four different women in your quest to achieve your goal of having the American dream! And now you’re telling me it’s as easy as flipping a switch?!”
And the thing was…he couldn’t explain it. For him, it really was like flipping a switch. The day after his failed wedding, he woke up and felt…fine. Sure, he was embarrassed that all his friends and family witnessed the most humiliating moment of his life, but…he wasn’t upset about Tracy leaving him. For years he’d thought there was something wrong with him because he was so anxious to get married, but now he feared there was something wrong with him because he felt nothing about not getting married.
“I guess I seriously do need therapy,” he murmured.
The outings he had talked Skye into taking with him were helping. It was nice to talk with someone who wasn’t directly hounding him about his feelings and he could tell that she wasn’t judging him–not really. Tyler and his other friend
s were all still tippy toeing around him and it was getting old, but he had Skye to hang out with and he was enjoying it.
He just wasn’t telling anyone about it and apparently, neither was she.
Elliott knew eventually she’d tell him she didn’t have the time to hang out or she was just done playing amateur psychologist with him, but for now he was going to simply take what she was willing to give him.
His doorbell rang promptly at seven and he smiled when he opened the door and found her standing there.
And not just because she was holding a pizza.
He was genuinely enjoying her company.
Although…tonight they agreed to do away with the physical activities and sit down and talk about how he was doing. It wasn’t something he was particularly looking forward to, but if he was going to talk to anyone about how he was feeling, it was Skye.
It was weird how it took him hitting rock bottom to realize just how awesome she was. His sister was always going on about Skylar, but this was the first time he was finding out for himself.
“Hey,” she said, smiling as he took the pizza box from her hands. “I’m just warning you now that the last thing I ate today was half a granola bar at around ten, so I may eat more than you tonight.”
That just made him laugh. “Okay. We’ll see how that goes.” They walked to the kitchen where he already had the table set for them and within minutes, they were eating. “Any crazy clients today?”
“I don’t even want to talk about it,” she said around a mouthful of pizza. “What about you? How’s your week been?”
His week was pretty tame, but he wanted to get right to the deep conversation so they could move on because, honestly, the topic of his failed relationships was bringing him down. If he could just ignore it and move on, he’d be so much happier. But over the last several weeks, Skye had been telling him that he needed to deal with it before he could move on.
So…here they were.
After finishing his first slice of pizza, he jumped right in.
“You know how you’ve been telling me that I need to really think about all the failed crap and why I did what I did?”
She paused mid-chew and stared at him. “Really? You want to do this now?”
The Engagement Embargo Page 7