The Antithesis- The Complete Pentalogy

by Terra Whiteman

  But Leid ignored me, her eyes never leaving Raith. She gave him a long hard minute to take her in, but he hadn’t needed that much time to finally understand the situation. In fact, now he looked as horrified as me.

  “A contract with a scholar,” he said, his words barely anything more than breath. “Well, isn’t this something?”

  “So you know what I am.”

  “I do.”

  “Then I don’t need to explain why you’ll release the Regent immediately.”

  “I’m not so sure about that,” he said, crossing his arms. “I might contact the Court of Enigmus and inform them that one of their scholars has violated her contract.”

  Ferocity wicked across Leid’s face. It was a look I’d never seen on her, not even in her angriest moment. “I suppose that’s another option, but let me stress the fact that should you do that, the Ark will be a ball of smoking scrap metal within the hour.”

  Was she really capable of destroying the Ark? By herself?

  “You’d actually commit genocide?”

  An eerie, beautiful smile. “It wouldn’t be the first time, Commander Raith.”

  The confidence on his face bled out. “Yahweh didn’t tell me about you. Why?”

  “I’m not sure. Maybe you should ask him. Do you believe my threat?”

  The entire bridge was silent. All eyes were on the screen.

  Lucifer hung his head, sighing heavily. “Yes, I believe it.”

  Her fury dimmed, like a slow-dying flame. “Good. I’ll be there in half an hour to take the Regent back to his city. I’d prefer him in one piece. Is that fine with you?”

  “It’s fine.”

  “If you contact the Court of Enigmus, I’ll know, and our meeting won’t be a pleasant one.”

  Before he could respond, she cut the call and the screen switched to static. The moment Leid was gone, Raith kicked over the vacant chair beside me. But he didn’t scream. He didn’t make a single sound. All he did was glare at me with rage far beyond what words could measure. His desire to kill me was as palpable as my rapid-fire pulse. But he didn’t. He couldn’t.

  He couldn’t because that scholar was in love with me.

  “Take the Regent back into holding,” he muttered.

  As his guards approached, Raith stormed from the bridge without another word.

  XXXII

  VENGEANCE

  THE BOILER PIPE WAS WEDGED BETWEEN MY shoulder blades, its cold metal biting through my suit. The guards had tied me a lot tighter this time.

  My discomfort wasn’t much of a concern. All I could think about was how Leid had just thrown herself to the wolves in order to save me. Surely she knew that after I returned to Sanctum, Lucifer would call her people and they’d come here to…

  What would they even do? Punish her? Punish us?

  The minutes ticked away as I faded in and out of coherency, slipping between lucid dream and painful reality. The relief of rescue had been snatched away by the knowledge of subsequential consequence.

  And then I thought of Lucifer Raith—of his vainglorious air and snide demeanor. I had failed to kill him, and in turn the war was left unfinished, stale-mated yet again. But now I stood to lose a lot more than my world.

  I would lose Leid.

  And then I would lose everything else.

  The door opened and Yahweh appeared, dragging along a vitals machine, stethoscope swaying on his lithe, boyish neck.

  He reached into the pocket of his white physician’s coat, retrieving another syringe. I cringed, but didn’t cower this time.

  “I’m here to make sure you’re okay,” he said in an assuring voice. “I haven’t confirmed the inhibitor’s safety so I’d like to check your vitals, if you’ll let me.”

  “How could I not? Your cunt of a father saw to it that I can barely move.”

  Yahweh froze, several feet away. “I won’t force you to accept care.”

  I eyed the syringe. “Like you didn’t force that thing into my neck? Twice?”

  “You act like I had a choice.”

  I opened my mouth to respond, but then I actually thought about what he’d said. In the split second that it’d taken to exhale, I placed myself in his shoes. He was right. I hadn’t given him a choice. I’d forced him to help us execute his father, and I was stupid for believing Yahweh would actually go through with it.

  All I did was look away.

  Yahweh continued his approach, kneeling beside me. He shined a light in my eyes and I squinted, turning my head.

  “Stop,” he instructed. “I need to see how dilated your pupils are.”

  I conceded, only because it would be over sooner this way. Yahweh removed the light and put the stethoscope tips in his ears, sliding the cold metal diaphragm under my suit, against my bare skin. I jumped at the sudden stimulus, and he looked away, concentrating on the sound of my heart.

  I didn’t like this; I didn’t like him touching me. It felt disgusting and awkward.

  “Your heartbeat is elevated,” he stated. “But I bet you’re considerably stressed. Are you still dizzy?”

  “A little.”

  “Can you see me well?”

  “Unfortunately.”

  Yahweh sighed, removing the diaphragm from my chest. Then he shoved something into my mouth, which I immediately spat out. He picked it up, holding it in front of my face. It was a thermometer.

  “I need to check your temperature,” he said. “Please hold this under your tongue or I’ll be forced to put it somewhere else, and I can guarantee you won’t like that.”

  Someone kill me.

  The underside of my tongue pressed down on the thin cylinder, and Yahweh let go of it. As I held it in my mouth, he sat cross-legged beside me, awaiting the result. He didn’t look at me, and instead cast his sad gaze at the floor. “I know you won’t believe it, but I didn’t want any of this to happen.”

  I didn’t respond, since the thermometer was still in my mouth.

  “I created the inhibitor as a failsafe, in case everything turned out like… well, like this.”

  The thermometer beeped and he took it from me.

  “Are you done?” I muttered.

  “Almost.”

  “What else?”

  “It wasn’t a lie, Qaira,” he whispered. “I didn’t pretend to like you. I like you very much. I respect you, and I wish you felt for Lucifer as you do for me. We’re not that different.”

  “We are very different,” I said coldly, gazing away. “And I feel nothing for you. Not anymore. Not after what you did. I should have let you die.”

  Yahweh recoiled, as if he’d been slapped. The hurt on his face was hard to ignore, but I did it anyway. He gathered up his equipment with eyes trained on the floor, hands shaking as they worked. “Malice is an ingredient for destruction,” he said. “Malice saves nothing. No one. Maybe one day you’ll understand.”

  And then he shuffled out, closing the door.

  My disdain melted away as he left, and I watched the door shut with reluctant guilt. As angry as I was, I had lied to him. I wouldn’t have let him die, even now.

  And then I realized that I could feel my arms and legs; Yahweh had forgotten to give me that syringe, and the effects of his last dose were fading. The guilt faded with them, replaced by a surge of adrenaline and rage. All hope was not lost.

  Yahweh was wrong. Malice did save something.

  It saved me.

  And now it was the only thing that kept blood pumping through my veins.

  ***

  The external port opened and angels dragged me out, cold wind beating our bodies. It slapped my face like a frozen hand, and even threatened to tear the visors from the guards’ heads. Raith led the charge, unflinching, his long red coat whipping like a war flag behind him.

  A black smear grew prominent against the canvas of muddy clouds, rising from below until it broke cloud cover and approached the port.

  An enforcer carrier-craft.

  Everyone was still
as it docked and the doors opened. Leid had come alone, which meant she’d known how to fly our crafts all along. My brain started to scream ‘How?!’ but then thought such an effort was a waste. It was better not to question these kinds of things when it came to Advisor Koseling.

  It was a gallant gesture—coming alone to an alien base ship, surrounded by armed angels, wearing only a thin smile. It was an act of non-provocation yet a display of apex predation, as if to tell her enemies that she needn’t any help to kill them.

  Wrapped in a white fur coat that touched her knees, she stepped off the craft and rose to face Commander Raith, stopping just feet from him. The difference in their heights was ridiculous. He, six-five and she, five foot nothing. But when it came to Leid, size didn’t matter, and Raith knew that all too well.

  He looked down at her, mild surprise crossing his face, leading me to believe scholars weren’t normally so tiny. And then his eyes settled on hers, softness rounding the hard edges of his frown. He’d noticed her beauty.

  “Good evening, Commander Raith,” she greeted, studying his wounded face. “The televised screen does you an injustice, I must say.”

  Lucifer ignored her sarcasm. “Why are you putting your life on the line for Qaira Eltruan?”

  She didn’t respond, looking at me. “May I have him, please? It seems he needs medical attention.”

  I kept my head down, feigning sedation. In reality I was eyeing the blade on a soldier’s belt.

  Lucifer didn’t move aside. “You’re not a noble.”

  “Correct.”

  “Whose guardian are you?”

  My attention pricked at the word guardian.

  “I am the guardian of no one.”

  “Every noble has a guardian.”

  “My noble is dead.”

  He smiled. “Aipocinus’ guardian. Ah, if only he could see you now.”

  “If only,” she recited, growing annoyed. “I didn’t come here to discuss private Vel’Haru matters with a lesser.”

  “It’s hardly private when you’re threatening to kill us for a man who isn’t even worth the dirt on my boots.”

  My jaw clenched.

  Leid’s smile faded.

  He noticed her falter. “You’re in love with a genocidal monster, and I’m sure you know that. Why?”

  “Give me the Regent, Commander Raith. I won’t ask you again.”

  Lucifer sighed. “Release him,” he ordered to his men. He stepped aside as the guards ambled me forward, handing me off to Leid. But as soon as they let go of my arms, I broke the chains around my wrists, links flying in every direction. Before anyone could react, I slid the blade from the sheath on the soldier’s belt and shoved him off the side of the port.

  He fell, too stunned to spread his wings, succumbing to turbulence within seconds.

  Lucifer turned at the commotion, just as I lunged at him with the blade raised over my head. He stepped back as I swung. Warm blood hit my face, accompanied by a searing pinch in my gut. I hadn’t heard the shot fired, but caught the echo.

  A hit.

  A hit!

  But not a fatal one.

  Raith was still alive, pointing a smoking pulse gun at my chest. Blood gushed from the sleeve of his right arm, a severed hand lying between us. Adrenaline had allowed him not to notice it yet, but then he did, and he screamed.

  And then I realized that he’d hit me, too. He’d hit me worse. I held my stomach, dropping the blade. My steps were staggered and I couldn’t keep my balance. My body was getting colder by the second.

  “Qaira!” Leid screamed, but she sounded distant, far away.

  And then my feet ran out of port, and I fell off the Ark, eyes rolling into my head as clouds and darkness coalesced.

  ***

  My body hit the cold, black waves with a clap.

  The Ocean of Maghir welcomed my arrival with open arms, pulling me under. I sank, watching what little light there was fade with the surface. My eyes stayed open, waves droning in my ears, as objects fell around me. Bodies, all of them. Thousands of bodies—fallen Sanctum soldiers, children—now corpse statues, slaves to Maghir.

  I tried to flail, thrash, swim to the surface, but my body was leaden. I was gone. I was lost—just another body in the ocean of death. A lost soul in a place I had never believed was real.

  “Qaira…”

  My eyes fluttered. Black bubbles drew from my lips like crystal oil.

  “Qaira…”

  Warmth returned to my fingers, and they twitched. I floundered, rising.

  “Qaira, please…!”

  Leid.

  Leid.

  I fought for the surface as shadowy hands grabbed at my feet, trying to pull me under again. My lip curled in a snarl, determination moving waves of heat through my body, giving me strength. No, I would not go. I would not.

  My face broke the surface and I opened my eyes wide, gasping for breath.

  And then cold air beat against my face, and I was weightless.

  Falling, again.

  A hard slap sent my head sideways. Reality exploded back—roaring wind, that searing pain in my stomach, and Leid’s screams. Sobs.

  “Qaira, wake up!” She slapped me again and again, even as I awoke and stared at her, utterly confused. “Your wings! Use your wings!”

  We were falling from the Ark.

  We were falling. Leid had jumped off with me.

  I pulled her into me, releasing my wings. But I was too late—the ground was seconds away, and all I could do was cushion the bone-shattering collision that would follow. I turned sideways, shielding her from impact. My back slammed into the tundra in a cloud of debris. Leid was torn out of my arms as we rolled along the ground for what felt like eternity.

  I lay on my side, coughing up blood. Leid was strewn only feet from me, but it might as well been miles. I couldn’t reach her. I couldn’t move.

  Blood trickled down my forehead, pooling into my eyes. It stung, and I shut them, unable to lift my hand to wipe the blood away.

  She was face down and unmoving, a lithe arm outstretched, scratched and bloody.

  “Leid,” I whispered.

  Nothing. Not a single thing.

  No.

  No, please.

  Gritting my teeth, I forced my arm to move and I reached for her outstretched hand. Our fingertips fell centimeters apart. Too far.

  Sight left my eyes like a heavy blanket, and the last thought I had was that I would return to Maghir’s Ocean—;

  And this time, Leid would sink with me.

  O

  OF KIN

  Yahweh Telei—;

  EVERYTHING SEEMED SO ALIEN.

  I was home—as home as I could be—and yet there was an aching in my chest that told me I shouldn’t be here. Not here, not now. There were too many things happening all at once, and many of them were my doing.

  My footsteps were soft against the bridge hall, but the ones behind me were heavy—powerful, formidable. And then they stopped.

  I turned and saw my brother standing in the glass hall, looking out into the Ark. Light reflected from his cool, blue eyes as he marveled silently at all we’d done in his absence.

  “The Commander is waiting for us,” I said, urging him along.

  Ixiah looked at me, expressionless. He appeared no older than the day he’d left, but there was an obvious difference. He wasn’t an angel anymore, and it showed. The soft wisdom in his eyes had been replaced by a stoic gaze.

  Lifelessness, apathy. The signature look of a scholar.

  He said nothing, lowering his head and pressing on.

  When my father had called the Court of Enigmus, I’d felt a fluttering in my chest at the chance of seeing Ixiah again. It’d been so long—five hundred years, but the excitement quickly turned to disappointment. We might as well been strangers.

  But there was a flicker in his eyes, one of recognition—feeling—when he looked at me, albeit that was all I’d been afforded.

  Lucifer was a
t his desk, staring out the window. The stack of papers next to him had grown exponentially since I’d been here last. He wasn’t himself, but I couldn’t blame him.

  He turned at the sound of our entrance, settling a gaze of surprise on my brother. Lucifer had noticed the change, too.

  “Thank you for coming,” he said. “I wasn’t expecting you so soon.”

  “I came the moment I was given word, Commander Raith.”

  Not Lucifer. Commander Raith. Once upon a time we were family.

  Lucifer’s eyes lowered to the clutter on his desk, burying his wounded arm deeper into his coat. The more he tried to hide it, the more obvious it became. Five days ago I’d cauterized it, and the stench of burning flesh always accompanied that memory. Lucifer had lost his hand because of me. Because I’d forgotten to give Qaira that sedative.

  I never told him what I’d done; I was too ashamed.

  “Can I get you anything to eat, or drink?” offered Lucifer.

  Ixiah shook his head. “No, thank you.”

  I inched toward the door, but Lucifer caught me. “No, Yahweh. I’d like you to hear this as well.”

  I returned to my brother’s side, exhaling slowly. We sat across the desk.

  Lucifer’s eyes darted between us, and he smiled mirthlessly. “You two almost look identical now.”

  Ixiah and I looked at each other, saying nothing. It was true. In a few hundred years I would be the age equivalent of when he’d joined the Court of Enigmus. They did not age past their assimilation. And then with trepidation I realized that one day I would look older than my brother.

  “How much did your noble tell you?” asked Lucifer.

  “Enough,” said Ixiah.

  “That scholar; she was Aipocinus’ guardian, right?”

  “Yes. Her name is Leid Koseling, and she was a scarlet guardian before our King expired. She’s been under the supervision of my noble since.” Although Ixiah said this with dispassion, there was a spark of something in his gaze. It was enough to let us know that he did not like Leid Koseling.

  “Calenus is her appointed noble?” Lucifer asked, voice catching in his throat.