Emerging Temptation: A BWWM Romance Limited Edition Collection

by Peyton Banks

  I want to tell her I did, too. Show her, rather, but I’ve led her on long enough. Ariya leans forward to search my face, but I face away, snatching my coat on my way to the door.

  “Zander? You’re just going to leave? Can we at least talk about this?”

  Her words hold me prisoner. I grip the knob, squeezing until my knuckles turn white. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you, but it’s for the best.”

  “Zander!”

  I close the door behind me and stomp to my truck, praying she doesn’t follow me. When I’m seated inside, I stare back at the cabin while dragging my palm down my face.

  “This really is for the best,” I say out loud and start my engine, then radio the chief to let her know I’m heading to help Steve clear the debris.

  The truck door slams, grabbing Steve’s attention. He tilts his hat up to see me better.

  “Zander. Here to help out?”

  “Yes. Chief filled me in. Glad I keep my tools in my truck,” I answer and flip the tarp for my work gloves and electric saw.

  Before I can step in and assist, my radio blares from inside the cab. Shifting the machine to my left hand, I reach for it and answer the call.

  “Go ahead, Chief.” I release the button.

  There’s a static-filled pause. “What’s your twenty?”

  Chirp.

  “Just reached Steve.”

  Chirp

  “I need an escort up to a cabin.”

  Chirp.

  “Can Lowe handle it?”

  Chirp.

  “Lowe couldn’t make it in today.”

  Chirp.

  I huff. “All right. On my way.” I replace my tool and snatch off my gloves while hopping in the driver’s seat.

  The last thing I need is to be in another person’s presence right now. I was looking forward to cutting into the lumber. I shift into gear, and before I reach the station, I shove into park and plop my hat on.

  “Yo, Z,” a familiar voice belts out from the entrance.

  I stop in my tracks, pulling in a breath, bracing myself while trying to wrap my mind around seeing another blast from the past.

  “What’s up, Brady?” I squint to shield my eyes from the brush of wind.

  “Ian told me you were a real live mountain man. Look at you. All buff and bearded. Is that a man bun?” my old friend teases.

  I force a smile, inch forward to accept his brotherly greeting. Brady hasn’t changed a bit, still loud and arrogant, though he wears his hair low now.

  “How’ve you been?” I ask.

  “I’ve been good, man. Ready to get the hell away from this station.”

  “How long have you been in there?” I quiz and guide him to my vehicle.

  “Three damn days. My flight got in late, but the storm hit, and I ended up stuck down here. Those bastards better have left me some liquor. I’m ready to meet the bottom of a bottle after all this.” He hops inside and props his boot on the dash. Snow falls to the floor, and I have to stop myself from slapping his foot down. “You been up to see the guys yet? Dude, can you believe it’s been almost ten years since college?”

  In true Brady fashion, he spouts off one question after the other, not giving me a chance to answer even if I wanted. When Ian called me and asked me about setting them up in a cabin, he didn’t mention Brady was coming. Just that he and Noah were bringing their girlfriends. I pull off for the cabin, internally dreading having to face Ariya again. The way I ran out on her was a coward-ass move, and I’m certain she won’t let me get away with that a second time.

  “How I look, bro?” Brady attempts to iron out his shirt with his palms, interrupting my thoughts.

  “Fine... I guess.” I frown.

  He darts his head in my direction. “No, seriously, though. Do I look like crap or no?”

  “Dude, you look like Brady.”

  “Cool… Cool. I’ma be honest, I’m a little nervous, man.” He glances out the window.

  “For what? It’s just Ian and Noah.” I reach for the stereo, flipping it on to hopefully provide an imaginary buffer between my friend and all his talking. Being alone in near isolation for all these years changes your view on things, making you realize just how much you love the quiet.

  “I’m supposed to be meeting Ian’s girl’s foster sister. Bro, they sent me her pictures… Fucking sexy. You know how much I love me a sistah. Oof.” He slaps my arm with the back of his hand and whistles.

  I shift in my seat, tilting my neck from side to side to relieve the tension building at the mention of Ariya. Pressing my lips together, I force my eyes on the road and still the urge to punch the steering wheel. Of course she’s here to meet Brady, why else would she have come along on a couples’ trip? She carried about upset, questioning me for not giving us a chance when there was never one in the first place.

  Brady continues talking, but I’ve since tuned him out. I don’t care to know what he thinks of the woman I just slept with. And now that I have this information, I shouldn’t care about her. There should be no curiosity over if she’ll connect with him on the same level she has with me. But no matter how hard I try, the thought remains. If Brady had arrived on time, would she have spoken to me? There’s a heaviness in my chest the closer we get to the cabin. I rest my elbow along the edge of the window and scratch my chin. With my mouth pinched into a grimace, my vision tunnels in on the road in front of me and eventually blurs a little. It’s not until Brady jerks the wheel to the right with one hand on my shoulder that I realize I’d spaced.

  “You all right, bro?” he blurts out through sharp breaths.

  I wet my lips before sitting up. “Yeah, my bad. I didn’t see the deer.” I let out a sigh.

  “Focus, man. I’m not interested in dying out here,” he adds with a smudge of sarcasm.

  I tighten my grip and pull my brows together, determined to get this day over with. Here I am, belittling myself for my actions when it never mattered in the first place. Or at least it won’t in a minute. My fear was hurting her, not being enough for her, and though I knew it all along, it seems more prevalent now. God, why do I care what she does or who she ends up with? I shouldn’t but I do, and I feel like a fucking idiot for it. All morning I’ve lied, telling myself I don’t want her and that she’ll never be happy with me. That I’ll be better off alone, and she’ll do well to find someone else who can give her the joy I lost a long time ago. I realize now that’s not what I want at all. It’s perfect in theory. To have her go back to the city and do all those things away from me. Out of sight, out of mind is the saying, right? It’s easier to think of her with someone else if I never have to know about it.

  I should be happy for my friend, shouldn’t I? Ariya’s a great girl. She’s smart, accomplished, and like he said, damn beautiful. Brady’s a decent guy. He should be with someone with all those qualities.

  “Hey, man. I wanted to talk to you. I should have called years ago, but I kinda let life get in the way. It’s been a while, and you probably don’t even care. But I just wanted to say that I’m sorry about Melissa and I hate I wasn’t here for you when you needed us.”

  My shoulders stiffen, and there’s a thickening in my throat. I blink back a tear, refusing to let my emotions run loose. “Don’t worry about it.” I feign pleasantries when really I want to throw him from my truck for bringing her into this.

  “No, I’m serious. You’re my brother, man. We were thick as thieves in college, and even though I got on your nerves, gave you a hard time, you always had my back. I should have been here for you.”

  I huff. “Brady, that was a long time ago. I’m over it.”

  He nods, accepting my answer, and directs his gaze up ahead. The old cabin comes into view, and he perks up. Light flashes in his eyes, and just like that I’m reminded what the excitement is for. He looks at me, and I fake a smile, only to have it turn into a frown when he exits the vehicle with his bags in tow.

  “Come inside for a minute,” he says before closing t
he door.

  I shake my head, and he opens it back up.

  “A minute ain’t gon’ kill you,” he adds.

  I weakly shift into park and step out into the cool air. Pulling down on my coat, I inch forward, contemplating if I want to ignore his request and book it back to my truck.

  9

  Ariya

  “Zander’s back, and he has Brady with him,” Jasmine yells from the kitchen.

  I hop off the last step, the corners of my lips raising at the mention of his name, but I quickly relax my facial muscles. There should be no warm and fuzzy feelings moving around my core. I should be storming out there and cursing him for walking away. But my posture softens as I come to terms with the fact that arguing with him is the last thing I want to do.

  Ian and Noah both say in unison, “About damn time.”

  Noah pushes off the counter and walks into the living area while Ian stands from his seat. Karen’s on the sofa nursing a bottle of water when she looks back at me and jumps up in a panic. Her eyes are wide, and I can see she’s holding her breath.

  “Shit,” she says and rushes toward them. “Wait…um, babe, don’t open the door yet. Jas!” She glances between the two, but Ian ignores her plea.

  Jasmine stares at her, confused. Karen mouths something, and Jasmine nods, bug-eyed, and whispers, “I know.”

  “Ian, hold on.” Karen tries once more, but the door is open, and in comes the person I presume to be Brady.

  I watch Ian and Noah interact with their friend, both taking turns greeting him and wasting no time bombarding him with questions. Karen tries eagerly to get Ian’s attention, but he still doesn’t seem to notice. Jasmine grabs her arms, coaxing her to explain what’s wrong. She looks to me then back to Jasmine before whispering in her ear. Jasmine shoots her gaze to me, her eyes bulging from their sockets. I start toward them to demand they tell me why in the hell they’re acting so weird, but I catch sight of Zander. He’s behind this Brady guy, standing in the doorway with his gaze fixed on me. A smile forms on my lips but quickly falters when he frowns at me instead.

  Torn between confronting my friends or him, I pause and choose him. They’ll be here all day, well, until we begin packing up to hit the road later, but he’s prone to running away. If I’m going to get any answers and hopefully talk things out with him, now’s my chance. I saunter in his direction, swaying between everyone else. Jasmine reaches for me, but I dodge her attempt and tread forward.

  Brady steps in my path, a wide grin plastered on his mug. “Wow. You must be Ariya? Your pictures nor your friends do you any justice, you’re gorgeous. I’m Brady, nice to finally meet you after hearing so much about you.” He extends a hand.

  “Fuck,” one of the girls mutters.

  I peer down at it, then over to my girls who stand there with pained expressions, then over to the boys who’re smiling way too hard. Neither person step up to tell me what’s going on.

  “Someone needs to explain right now?” I say sternly.

  Brady raises a brow as his shoulders hunch forward and his smile falls to the floor. Taking a step back, he looks around the room, his demeanor demanding answers as well.

  “This is my boy, Brady. They guy we mentioned the other night,” Ian answers.

  I move back from the group, forging a gap between us to allow myself a moment to process this new information.

  “Wait? She didn’t know she was meeting me?” Brady chimes in, glaring at his friends. “You’ve got to be kidding me. That’s fucking bogus.”

  “You damn right it is,” I butt in. “You had me carrying on all weekend knowing Zander wasn’t the guy.”

  Shit, Zander. I crane my neck to glance past Brady, only to find the entryway empty. I rush to the window, hoping to at least see his truck, but both it and him are long gone. Wrapped up in the confusion and the news about Brady, I can’t even recall when he walked away. This is why I don’t like people interfering in my love life. It’s messy, and quite frankly, nobody’s business.

  Clutching the collar of my shirt, I squeeze my eyes closed while shaking my head. This is a disaster, something straight out of a movie. Except, this is my life, and I don’t appreciate being toyed with. But it all makes sense now. His standoffish behavior, the strange expression he gave when I questioned him about being here if he was just going to blow me off, the back and forth he’s put me through, everything. It all comes together in this moment. Now I wonder if he knew this whole time and was just playing me. But I replay the look on his face when Brady walked into the cabin and feel strongly it was news to him, too.

  “Hold up.” Noah’s voice brings me back in the moment. “Ariya and Zander have been hooking up? When did that start?”

  “Shut up,” Jasmine grunts through her teeth. “Ariya, babe. We didn’t know. Otherwise, we would have said something.”

  I glare at Karen, because Jasmine’s wrong. At least one person here besides me and Zander knew we’d been fooling around. She’d confronted me about it just hours ago—that was the time for her to speak up.

  Her head hangs low, and she pulls in a deep breath. “I tried to tell you this morning.”

  “No, you didn’t.”

  “I did. You were going on about him, and I tried to stop you, but you didn’t let me and just walked off.”

  “Yep! This…is…awkward,” Brady retorts and slams himself into the chair. “So are you going to go after him or no?”

  “For what?” I bark. “He ran…again.”

  Karen places a hand on my shoulder, but I jerk away. “Don’t touch me.”

  “Okay.” She holds her palms up in surrender. “I won’t.” She looks to Ian then back to me. “But I think you should go after him.” Her voice rises a notch and I frown. “While we were on our hike, I asked Ian about him. You know, trying to feel him out without giving anything away. We’d already vetted the shit out of Brady, hint the reason we’re all here. But I wanted to know about Zander, considering you two connected. Listen… It’s not our story to tell, but I think you should find him, let him explain.”

  “He’s long gone.” My voice cracks, and I clear my throat to push the cobwebs away.

  “You can go to his cabin,” Ian offers.

  I straighten my posture, recalling our conversation from the first night. He’d mentioned where he lived. Everyone stares at me, waiting for me to make a decision. I walk backwards, turning a few feet away. I take the steps two at a time to grab my coat from my room. I slip my arms in and zip it up before pulling my hat down over my braids and rushing back downstairs.

  “I can drive you,” Noah offers.

  “I’ll walk,” I say as I pass them and exit the cabin.

  I pause on the porch, trying to think back on our drive here to determine if the cabin numbers go up the mountain or down. Yanking on my gloves, I step into the snow and make my way up hill. I’ve always hated hiking and doing the whole camping thing as a child, but one thing that I do remember is how peaceful and great the activity can be when one needs to clear their mind. That’s what I need right now, and why I chose not to let Noah drive me there. I’m still not trying to die being one with nature and shit, but the walk can help me formulate my plan. Give me time to calm down before I reach him. Whether he knew about Brady or not, whether I want to smack him for fucking me and bolting or not, there’s a part of me that wants to hear him out.

  It’s crazy, and I’ll be honest and say I feel like one of those people I vowed to never be. You know, the people who fall for someone way too quick. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want him. I just hope when I find him, he doesn’t retreat and wants to at least talk about seeing what’s happening between us.

  10

  Zander

  Crack.

  I bring my ax down on the fallen branches, splitting it into smaller pieces to be used as firewood. It’ll need to be dried out, but that’s okay. I have plenty to tide me over until the process is complete. Steve has gone for the evening, leaving me alone with
my tools and miles of empty snow-covered forest. Just what I need to occupy my mind and keep me from dwelling over Ariya. It doesn’t work. With every passing second and each swing of my ax, I think of her. The faint hint of honey I smelled when I kissed her neck haunts me. My fingers burn at the memory of touching her soft skin, and despite the cold air, my loins ache to be inside her again.

  For hours I’ve been out here, hammering out my frustrations and confiding in the thing that’s been my friend for the last three years: nature…silence…darkness. But my head is clouded, and my heart twinges with remorse. Of course she’ll want Brady. He may be a pain in my ass and talks too much, but he’s a great guy. Women flocked to him as the jock in the crew, and clearly that’s still a thing for him. I told her no, wouldn’t allow her any closer than we’d already gone. So why am I pissed right now? I shouldn’t care if she’s cozying up next to him, but I do.

  Crack.

  The wind picks up, sending flurries whirling around me. Shielding my eyes with my palms, I look up, noticing the thickness of the flakes. Daylight has long gone, and darkness adorns the sky. I swing my ax, cutting into the final limb, then load it all on the back of my truck.

  Chirp. My radio blares, and I reach inside the cab to answer it.

  “Go ahead.”

  The line clicks. “You’re not still out there, are you?”

  I pull back the tarp. “Loading up the planks now.”

  “Make it quick. I don’t know what’s going on this weekend, but another bad wave is about to hit us. Get inside as soon as you can. They’re talking about another ten inches or so.”

  Shit. “Okay, going home now.” I hop in the driver’s seat and start my engine.

  My tires skid before finding their grip, allowing me to finally pull away. I drive along the road with my high beams on, bracing myself from all the bumps in the uneven surface. It’s hailing now, obstructing my view, forcing me to turn on my wipers. They scrape against the glass, barely helping with my sight, so I turn them on full blast. If my cabin was closer to the rest of the park residences, I’d be a little worried. But fortunately for me, the farther up the mountain you go, the more spaced out the homes are. There’s only a handful of us who own property out here, everything else serves as rental space for year-round camping. It’s for that reason I’m not too worried about potentially running into anything.