by Erin Osborne
After we check out, Raine and I go to another store. It has more baby items in it. I choose one of those vibrating chairs and a swing to get the baby because Raine said he really doesn’t have anything like that yet. He’s got a bassinet, a bunch of onesies and pajamas for her, bottles, pacifiers, and a few other things. I also buy some wrapping paper and a card for him. Inside the card I’m going to put some money for more baby things and a gift card I got from each store. Because of the situation, there was no baby shower. Everyone has just been picking things up to help him out.
It doesn’t help that Raine and him were supposed to go shopping for things a week after NeNe ended up going into labor. They haven’t been able to go yet as he tries to get used to being a good father and having to cater to the needs of his daughter.
“What’s the baby’s name?” I ask my sister. “No one’s told me yet.”
“Oh, um, well Capone will tell you,” Raine answers, not looking at me as we leave the store with our purchases.
“Why can’t you tell me? I want to put her name on the card,” I ask, frustration lacing my voice.
“Look, he asked me not to tell you the name and I promised I wouldn’t. He wants to be the one to tell you,” she answers.
“Fine.”
I open the back of her SUV and get the things out I need to wrap the gifts and put the gift bag of clothes together. We’re heading to the clubhouse from here and I don’t want to have to do it there. So, this is what I’m working with. It’s not ideal, but I can make it work.
After wrapping the gifts, putting the gift bag together, and filling out the card, I place the items I got in the back of the SUV so Raine can take care of hers. Once she’s done wrapping her things and putting together a gift bag, we head over to the clubhouse. I don’t want to be there for long because I need to finish the ledgers and get to bed early. I’m leaving here early tomorrow morning so I can get back to Steel Mills early.
I’ve got work to do for Keira and there’s a few other premade covers I want to finish working on before I go back to work at the restaurant. Premade covers are starting to pick up for me so I want to have a good selection for authors who don’t necessarily have the money for a custom cover design. Plus, I have to do some accounting work for things I’ve purchased and money I’ve had come in lately. I’ve been slacking in that area of my own business.
Before I’m ready, Raine is pulling into the clubhouse. There’s a lot of bikes here and Axel pulls in behind us. I also see a new SUV sitting next to Raine’s parking spot. I wonder who it belongs to. My sister sees me looking and lets me know it’s Capone’s SUV. He uses it now because of the baby. The only time he rides his bike is when he heads over to Blazing Babes for a quick check in with the staff. Wrath has been doing most of his work there and hasn’t complained about it. I’m not surprised since he gets to look at women stripping all night long.
We get out of the SUV and Axel helps us grab everything to carry inside. I’m left with my gift bag and the vibrating chair while he grabs the swing and other things. Axel can barely see over what he’s carrying because he told us to keep stacking things on the swing.
As I go to shut the door of the SUV, I grab the batteries I bought for the swing. Placing them in the gift bag, I make sure everything is set before heading inside. Really, I’m just taking a minute because this is the first time I’m going to see him since I left. I’m not sure if I’m ready to see Capone with his child, but it looks like I don’t have a choice as Raine sticks her head out the door and waits for me.
Taking a deep breath, I walk inside and let my eyes adjust to the dimness of the common room compared to outside. My eyes immediately land on Capone. He’s shirtless and wearing a pair of sweats while holding a small baby against his chest. His hair is in disarray and he looks exhausted. There’s a few days growth of hair on his face and his eyes lock on mine. It’s as if there’s no other person in the room as I take him in. I feel like a woman who’s been dying of thirst and I finally see water close enough to drink my fill of.
“Holls,” he says, his voice deep and sleep filled.
“Capone,” I respond, not sure how to act around him now.
“Hollie, I’ve missed you so much,” he says, walking closer to me.
With every step he takes toward me, my heart breaks a little more. I’m not ready to see his daughter and look at how she’ll always remind him of NeNe. But, I have no choice in the matter. So, I stay where I’m at and let him come to me.
Capone stops once he’s in front of me. He reaches out with one hand and lets his palm rest against my cheek. I relish the warmth from his body as it soaks into mine. He pulls me into his chest, being careful of the sleeping baby and holds me close.
“I’m so sorry I haven’t called you,” he whispers into my hair. “Come to my room with me?”
I nod my head, afraid I’m going to ruin this moment. It may not seem like much, but being held in Capone’s arms is something I’ve longed for. It’s like I was missing a part of myself and he just gave it back to me.
We walk to the back hall and he opens the door and lets me go in before him. There’s baby things all over and it looks as though he needs a good cleaning in here. I randomly start picking up the clothes on the floor and toss them into the laundry basket sitting by the bathroom.
“You don’t have to do that,” he murmurs, laying the baby down in her bassinet.
“Just trying to help you out. How are things going?” I ask.
“It’s an adjustment for sure. It’s been hard. That’s why I haven’t called you or anythin’. By the time I’m gettin’ up, I figure you’re headin’ to bed. Can you sit down for a minute?” he asks, his tone soft and pleading.
I toss what I have in my hand to the basket before sitting on the bed next to him. Capone looks at me for a minute and takes in every detail about me. I look at him and take in his rumpled state. I’ve never seen Capone looking anything less than his best. Even when he would share a bed with me, he looked good just waking up. Now, he looks rumpled, sleep deprived, and like he’s not sure what he’s supposed to do.
“So, what did you name your daughter?” I ask him, trying to think of something to say.
“I named her Amber Rose. For you,” he answers.
For a minute, I say nothing. We talked about what we’d name our kids one day. He was trying to keep my mind occupied. I said I’d name my daughter Amber Rose because I loved the way it sounded. To know he remembered the name and chose to name his daughter that fills my heart with sadness and another feeling I’m not quite sure of.
“W-Why did you choose that name?” I ask, looking over the side of the bed at the baby for the first time.
“Because NeNe is not her mother. You are the only woman she’ll ever know as he mother. I didn’t get to share the first experience of havin’ a child with you, but this is somethin’ I could give you. So, Amber Rose is her name and I hope you’re not mad at me,” he says, holding my hand in his.
“No, I’m not mad.”
Amber is so small as she lays on her back. Her little fists are up by her head while the rest of her tiny body is stretched as she sleeps. I laugh a little when her mouth begins moving as if she’s got a pacifier or bottle in it. She’s got dark blonde peach fuzz on her head and I feel like she’ll have Capone’s coloring as she gets older. The longer I look at her sleeping, the more I realize she’s almost a little clone of her father. There’s not really anything I can see from NeNe right now.
“She’s so beautiful,” I tell him honestly.
“Thank you. When are you headin’ back?” he asks.
“Early tomorrow morning. I think I’m leaving here around five. I have work to do when I get home. And I still have to finish the ledgers before I leave,” I tell him as sadness at leaving him fills me.
“Oh. So, you can’t hang out for a while?” he asks hopefully.
“No, I’m afraid I can’t. But, I got you some gifts for the baby out in the common room.
If you need anything, reach out. Even if it’s just to talk,” I tell him.
“I will. Things are startin’ to get easier. I’ll make it a point to talk to you, Holls. I promise. I love you and want you home,” he tells me.
“I know. I love you, Capone. I’m going to head out. I’ll let you know when I get home,” I tell him, placing a soft kiss on his lips before heading out of his room.
Walking through the common room, I find Raine so I can head back to her house.
“I need to get back to the house. If I’m going to finish working and get some sleep, I need to get back to it,” I tell her.
“Okay. Did you talk to Capone?” she asks.
“Yeah. We still have a lot to work out, but I’m sure we’ll get there. Or we won’t and things will remain the same as they have been,” I tell her.
Axel lets us know he’ll make sure Capone gets the things we brought him and we head out. Shane follows us out and to Raine’s house. He parks his bike and I’m guessing Satan will be heading out for work so he’ll be our babysitter for the rest of the day.
I lock myself in the bedroom and finish working on the books for the club. As soon as I’m done, I get something to eat, take a shower, and then get in bed. My alarm is set for four thirty in the morning so I can get up and get around to head out. It’s crazy early, but I don’t have a choice if I want to get my other work done. I’ll leave the books in Satan’s office just before I leave as he asked and leave a note for my sister on the counter before leaving.
Sleep claims me as thoughts of Capone fill my head. He’s the last thing I see before I fall asleep and the first person I think of when I wake up.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Capone
IT’S BEEN A hard few weeks since bringing Amber home. She’s got her days and nights mixed up, has been fussy, and I’ve had little to no sleep. The entire time I’ve been with my daughter, I haven’t stopped thinking about Hollie. No, I haven’t contacted her even when I was in the hospital, that doesn’t’ mean I haven’t wanted to.
Amber and I are finally getting in a routine and I’m getting her back so she’s sleeping more at night and less during the day. Yeah, she still spends a lot of time sleeping no matter what time of day it is, but she’s only a few weeks old and it’s expected. She has her formula every few hours during the day and then I try to play with her so she stays awake for a little bit. At night, I give her a bath using the lavender baby wash Raine got me. It seems to help her sleep better.
The house bunnies have been at the ready anytime I need help. I hate using any of them when it comes to my daughter though. Rose and Kelly are the main two I have help me if Raine or one of the guys aren’t available. The rest can kiss my ass because they’re here to find someone to make them an ol’ lady and it’s not gonna be me. Hollie is the only one who will ever have that title in my life.
Today I’m going to try to go to Blazing Babes for some work. I need to place an order and have a meeting with the girls. I’ve been hearing murmurs of drug use in the club and I’m not going to let it happen. If drugs are coming into Willow Creek, someone is gonna pay for it. We’ll figure out where they’re coming from and nip it in the bud real quick. No one brings drugs into our town and thinks they can get away with it.
Raine is gonna watch Amber for me while I get out of the clubhouse for a few hours. I haven’t really left since Amber was born and I need to learn how to balance my work life with my family life. I’ve been doing a piss poor job of it so far. Today is the first day of me getting back on track.
While Amber is sleeping, I jump in a quick shower. After moving the bassinet over to the bathroom door, I get in and wash my hair and body. My ears are close to the shower curtain so I can hear any little movement or noise Amber makes. As soon as the soap is rinsed from my body, I get out and dry off. My daughter hasn’t moved a muscle in the short time I was in the shower.
Rolling her bassinet back to the side of the bed, I finish drying off so I can get dressed before Raine gets here for Amber. Pulling on my jeans, I put on a dark tee-shirt and slide my cut on over my shoulders. Man, I feel good putting my cut back on. Being at the clubhouse, I really haven’t been wearing it around. Finally, I pull my socks and boots on before brushing out my hair and tying a bandana around my head.
I’ve learned to either keep my hair up or have a bandana on when Amber’s awake. When her little fists get going, she’ll grab onto anything she can. I’ve had my hair pulled more times than I can count already and it’s not fun. I’m not sure how Raine and Hollie has done it with the twins. Their hair is a lot longer than mine.
By the time I’m ready to head out the door after putting everything in my pockets, there’s a soft knock. I pull open the door to find Raine standing there. The twins aren’t with her, so they must be with Satan. She comes into the room and looks down on Amber as I pull my keys back out.
“She just went down about a half hour or so ago. So, you’ll have a little bit of time before she’s up and ready to eat again,” I tell her.
“Okay. I’ll read or call Holls while I’m waiting for her to get up. Take your time, Capone. Satan’s gonna bring the kids over with him in a little while,” Raine tells me.
“Thank you,” I say, closing the door behind me.
Celia is in the hallway as I turn to leave. She’s been lurking around the back rooms and I’m not sure what’s going on with her. I’ll have to let Satan know so we can keep an eye on her.
“Capone, where’s the baby?” she asks, her voice high pitched.
“None of your fuckin’ business. What are you doin’ back here?” I growl out.
“I was going to my room,” she says, changing direction.
“Then why are you so close to my door? Your room isn’t anywhere near mine,” I ask her.
“Oh, I was going to see if you needed me to watch the baby for you,” she says.
“I’ve never had you watch my daughter and I never will. Keep lyin’ to me and your time here will be over before you know it. Stay the fuck away from me and don’t go near my room again,” I say, leaving her in the hallway and heading through the common room.
Wrath is sitting at the bar when I enter and he follows me outside. I’m going to make sure he knows exactly what to do when taking an order and he’ll be sitting in on the meeting with the girls. He’s the one who brought it to me about the drug use. There was apparently an incident at the club a few nights ago and one of the girls had to be taken out by ambulance.
We pull out of the clubhouse and make our way to Blazing Babes. Out of habit I ride by Hollie’s old house. Someone else is moving in as we ride by and my heart about stops in my chest as the realization she’s not living there anymore takes further root in my heart. We need to figure our shit out soon. I hate living without her, knowing she’s hours away from me and there’s nothing I can do about it.
As I’m thinking of Hollie, the rest of the ride to Blazing Babes goes by before I know it. It’s not good to zone out while riding a bike, or driving a car, but I can’t seem to stop the thoughts of Hollie from invading my mind when I least expect it. Wrath and I pull in and park by the door. It’s the spot reserved for club members to park and we take full advantage of it.
I walk in with Wrath following me and we find the girls sitting at the table in front of the stage waiting for us. I’m not happy as I take a look around the strip club I’ve been building up for several years now. It’s not exactly trashed, but it’s not up to my standards either. Usually Blazing Babes is clean enough you can eat off the floor of the place and it’s just not in that condition right now.
“So, I want to know what’s been goin’ on while I’ve been gone?” I start out saying.
The girls all look to one another and no one says a word. This is not gonna fly with me.
“I want to know why you think it’s okay to let the club go just because I’m not here. It’s not any other member of Blazin’ Outlaws to sit here and babysit you all. You know w
hat I expect and what the rules are for the club. I walk in here today and it’s not up to my standards. Why is that?” I ask again.
Still no one says a word about to me.
I walk over and slam my hand on the table. The girls all flinch as Wrath stands back with his arms folded across his chest. Turning my gaze to each girl in turn, I know the three that are using right now. Their eyes are bloodshot and they have a nervous twitch to them. They’ll be fired as of now.
“Candace, Ronnie, and Sarah, you no longer work at Blazin’ Babes,” I tell them. “If any others of you are usin’ you can get the fuck out with them. You three have two minutes to get your shit and get the fuck out of our club.”
Nodding my head, Wrath follows them to the dressing room to collect their things and lead them out the back door. None of them say a word since they know we have a zero-tolerance policy of drug use. I look at the rest of the girls and they look me in the eyes to ensure I can see they aren’t any of the ones using.
“The rest of you have an hour to get this club up to my standards. If it’s not, you can follow those other bitches out the door. I’m not goin’ to play games with any of you. My life is in a tailspin now and I won’t always be around. That doesn’t mean you have the right to let the place fall apart. I’m not happy and you’re all one step away from bein’ on probation again,” I tell them. “Get your asses up and get things done. The correct way or I won’t be keepin’ any of you.”
I stand my ground as the girls all stand up and rush around to get the club clean. Once I know they’re going to actually do their work, I head to the storeroom and begin taking inventory. Well, the first thing I do is walk behind the bar and make sure it’s stocked for the night’s show. Then, I make sure I get the inventory done.