The Rest of Forever

by Kitty Berry

  My eyes rolled into the back of my head when I felt the tight walls of her pussy grip around me, her wetness coated my shaft. My erection grew solid within seconds of feeling the pressure of being inside her and I began to fuck into her, pumping my hips, thrusting my cock into her at the speed and depth I knew she liked.

  It didn’t take me long to have her screaming my name while I chased my own second orgasm. We came together, then collapsed for some much-needed sleep.

  I waited until her breathing evened out, a yawn escaped me as I stretched. I was drowsy and my muscles were languid from the satisfaction of sex, but I had a job to do. My mind floated over the many times spent with Jordan just lying in bed together, post coital, the times she made me leap out of my comfort zone and take her to a crowded place, and even the few arguments we’d experienced as a new couple. My thoughts were fuzzy, and I wished I could cuddle behind her, notching my cock into the seam of her ass, and find peace in sleep. That wasn’t in the cards for me that night. But I needed a quick fix to get me through what was ahead, so I sought out her warmth under the covers and sighed at the comfort her body, lying peacefully next to mine, brought me.

  Pulling her closer to me, I spooned her like I craved and felt a strong sense of gratification when she sighed in sleep and eased into my embrace. But then reality hit my brain and I was forced to plant a gentle kiss to her bare shoulder before I hauled my ass out of the bed we shared.

  I snuck off to meet Dave Montgomery on the docks in Elliot’s backyard.

  He was standing with his back to me, not needing to turn around and see me to sense I was there. I’m sure he knew I was approaching from a mile away. “Black,” he greeted as I stepped onto the dock. “Your girl sleeping?”

  “Yes, sir. Jordan is a pretty sound sleeper after sex.”

  Dave chuckled. “You’re something else, Black. You sure she’ll be okay with this?”

  “I’m not going to tell her, sir. It’s not something I share with her, my job, that is.”

  Dave nodded, knowing what this job can do to a man and his family better than anyone. He had watched his best friend be forced undercover and taken away from his wife and son for ten years.

  “This should be quick and easy. Guy sounds like a grade-A asshole trying to scare Amanda or he has a beef with her.” He shrugs. “Could be that the new husband is the target. I’m predicting this is not going to take you all that long. I told Mac you’d be back and ready for another local assignment in no time. I also spoke to your father.”

  That had gotten my attention. My father wasn’t someone I cared to discuss. My sister and I had avoided him for the better part of our adult lives, and I had preferred to keep it that way.

  “I can’t imagine why, sir. You know my feelings.”

  Dave shrugged. “Crazy coincidence. He called me for an opinion on something and asked if I’d seen you.”

  Then it was me shrugging. “Yeah, we haven’t spoken in a bit.”

  “Two years is what I heard.”

  “With all due respect, sir, I really need you to shut the fuck up.”

  Dave laughed, then landed a punch to my bicep before pulling me into a side hug that had me cringing. “You’re all right, kid. Weird, but all right.”

  Dave and I spoke further about Amanda and speculated on the situation, then I headed back inside to find Jordan fast asleep and sprawled out diagonally on the bed.

  She loved to sleep that way. It was a quirk of hers I knew I’d miss.

  I laid next to her and drew her into my arms with a kiss to her forehead. Needing to inhale her scent and lock it into my brain, I leaned into her and breathed deeply. She never woke and I fell asleep beside her.

  The following morning, we left Falls Village for New York.

  Then my life had turned to shit because of one bad decision. I knew as it was happening that it was the wrong one; I should have sought the advice of my two best friends. I hadn’t, and it was something I’d regret for a very long time.

  So, instead of asking how they would have handled the situation with Jordan, I’d agreed to not fake my own death, but rather than ask them how I should proceed, I took it upon myself to break up with her…via text.

  The day I left, I woke before her and spent a moment relishing the silence of the morning. It’s not often obtained in the concrete jungle of the city, but that day had been eerily quiet. Only a few sounds from the street below made its way to our apartment as I noticed our in-sync breathing.

  I had left her sleeping in our bed in Manhattan and was already on my way back to the place we had just left only hours before when I texted her.

  Callan: Can you talk later?

  Jordan hadn’t replied right away; she must have still been asleep. It wasn’t until I was in Connecticut about to cross over into Massachusetts that she responded.

  Jordan: What’s up?

  I pulled into the first diner I could find and flopped my large body into a booth. When the waitress arrived, I ordered my usual meal and responded to Jordan.

  Callan: I’m not cut out for this.

  It wasn’t a lie. I knew a man like me really wasn’t cut out for love and fidelity, a long-lasting relationship, but I had hoped that Jordan wouldn’t notice, and we could have made a future together before she caught on to my shortcomings.

  Jordan: Cut out for what, Black?

  Callan: Sorry. Can’t be tied down.

  Jordan: What the fuck are you talking about? If I remember correctly, the only one of us that has ever been tied down was me and you were doing the tying so…

  The memory of that first time she allowed me to tie her down and spank the living shit out of her perfect ass had me hard under the table when the waitress arrived with my order.

  Callan: Made a mistake.

  Jordan: Damn right!

  Callan: I think we should break up.

  Jordan: What? Are you fucking kidding me right now, you asshole? What is this about?

  I ate my breakfast and pulled radio silence on her, stopped responding to her numerous texts, never answered any of her calls, and refused to allow Ace or Elliot to help me. I had disappeared in her eyes and I left it at that.

  Looking back from this attic, I can see that I might have made a few errors along the way. Being that it’s too late now to change things, I sigh and as my stomach growls, wish I hadn’t rushed to get up into this place where I’d be able to hear her, spy on her. Why I hadn’t thought about provisions, is anyone’s guess. I’m not myself without her. Well, the new and better me because when I was with Jordan, I was a better man.

  I hear loud music start to play in the house and the squealing of excited females fills my small space as the ladder lowers and I pray it’s my best friends coming with food and drinks and not one of their spunky women. I overheard the girls talking through the vents last night and they are not very pleased with me. Being trapped up here with them would not end well for my balls. I heard what they wanted to do to them, and I cringe at the thought of them getting their wish.

  Elliot and Ace appear with beer, food, and water to find me dressed in my standard issued camos like our days of old but with an added pink throw wrapped around me for warmth that I found in a box.

  “See,” Elliot states. “This is why we can’t have nice things.”

  I shoot the jokester of our group the middle finger, then grab for the food in Ace’s hands. “I got cold up here. It’s drafty and I think I saw a” - I lower my voice to a whisper. - “squirrel.”

  Ace and Elliot laugh. They know I don’t fuck with squirrels.

  “Why didn’t you bring food to eat?” Ace asks.

  “I figured one of you motherfuckers would feed me knowing that I was up here. Speaking of which, did you put that asshole up to saying that shit because you knew I’d hear him?”

  “Ah, no?” Elliot says, but it comes out more like a question.

  “Oh,” My body feels twitchy, I’m agitated over the information I need. “Do you think she’s
fucking that idiot?” I ask.

  Ace and Elliot make eye contact, both knowing that my symptoms are usually unperceivable, but they’re clearly noticeable now. I knew that isolating myself from my support group and typical daily routines would have that effect on me. Being away from Jordan is harder than I had figured.

  “Nah,” Ace and Elliot answer in unison.

  I down a beer and dive into the messy wings Ace hands me with a napkin. He knows I don’t like my hands messy. Once finished, I pull a ring pop from my pocket, unwrap it, and plunge it into my mouth for the comfort it always brings me.

  I’ve been sucking on them my whole life. Anytime things become too much, I turn to my old ways. It started when I was a young child and a speech therapist gave me a chewy toy to use when I was pissed. It helped me to not lash out and bite others. As I got older, but was still confused about the social world around me, it became unacceptable to have it around my neck. By then I could have expressed myself with words, but when frustrated, I was still acting out before thinking. One of my therapists had thought of the ring pop and I’ve used them ever since.

  Elliot looks to Ace for an explanation, but he doesn’t have one, so he shrugs and asks me if I’m okay.

  They’ve seen me in times of stress on the frontlines many times, but this was different. Risking my life and fucking it up apparently garner different emotional responses. Who knew?

  “Yeah, sure,” I say to put their minds at ease. I’ve learned to think about their feelings and that they might be different from my own. “Why, don’t I seem okay? I’ve always been a loner. Before you guys, I spent all my time alone. It’s cool, like the old days.”

  “You’re not alone, Black,” Elliot says with a pat to my shoulder that I don’t shrug away from. “We got your back, man. Always.”

  I know those words are true and they send a warm feeling rushing through my chest.

  “Yeah, thanks. Before we met, I never felt so hot about who I was. The kids at school and on my father’s base were fucking assholes to me most of the time,” I admit as my eyes water and I see Ace notice the slight twitching of my brow. “You guys were my first real friends.”

  “We know, man. Still are your friends. Forever,” Elliot says. “And Jordan still loves you. She’s not fucking that tool bag. He can barely form a complete sentence. I think she wants us to get pissed and cave. She’s looking to get us to tell her where you are and what you’re doing.”

  “Yup, my wife has tried no fewer than a million times to get me to crack. She’d be great in an interrogation room. I can’t tell you how many times I had to wait for her to get all sleep drunk to fuck her. Pregnancy hormones are awesome, but she’s tired all the time so after she tries to hold out, she starts falling asleep then forgets that she was mad at me because she’s horny and needs my dick.”

  “Do you tell her that when you’re trying to get ass?” Elliot asks. “It doesn’t sound like it’d end well.”

  “No, I don’t tell my pregnant wife that she only wants my dick because she’s horny from hormones. I also don’t remind her that she’s pissed over his shit,” Ace says while scowling at me. “I still don’t know what the fuck you’re thinking. Why don’t you just tell Jordan what you’re doing?”

  He’s right. I see that now. I should have probably just explained, in brief detail, about my job. I could have shared some of the responsibilities I have with her and she would have kept them to herself. Looking back, I admit, I may have fucked up…big. But I’m sure once I explain, all will return to normal. I’ll just finish this job then tell Jordan everything. No big deal.

  To hide my anxiety, I quip, “Did you come up here just to flirt with me or are you going to actual suck my dick?”

  “Christ, Black,” Elliot sighs. “You’re worse than I figured you’d be.”

  And he’s not wrong. I feel off and displaced. Feelings I haven’t felt in years are bombarding me.

  “I know. I’m not my normal social self,” I deadpan. “I feel off, back to the bad days before I knew you guys and had Jordan,” I shrug. “It won’t take me much longer though then it’ll go back to the way it was and I’ll be good.”

  Elliot and Ace make eye contact for reasons that elude me.

  I hear Elliot whisper to Ace, “We need to get him out of this. I’ll talk to my dad.” I roll my eyes over his concern, but my chest heats with something else I still don’t completely understand.

  “I’m fine. You seem a little tense though, Monti. What’s wrong, Adams not spanking your dick enough?”

  Humor and one-liners used to save me when I was younger, before I acquired muscles and the know-how to kill a man with my bare hands, so I revert to that now.

  “Dude, listen, as soon as the wedding is done, you need to leave the attic and go back to the house. I’ll talk to my dad and we’ll figure out a plan to get you back with Jordan, okay?”

  “I definitely deserve an award, like a trophy or like when my mother used to give me a bowl of ice cream when I was a kid. But not the kind with the vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry together. I don’t like when things touch that don’t match.”

  “We’ll get you anything you want, Cal,” Elliot says. “But now, we need to head back down. I’m going to miss you at the ceremony.”

  Elliot hugs me and for once, I don’t flinch at the sudden offer of affection. “I’ll miss being there,” I say from my heart, honest and true. “I’ll watch from up here and be there in spirit.”

  Elliot nods and Ace’s shoulder bumps me, knowing one embrace was enough for me before they head down into the house and I’m alone once more.

  Chapter Two

  I’m stuck watching from the window of my best friend’s attic as he makes the girl, I once thought I loved his wife.

  I spot Jordan the moment she appears in her gorgeous dress with her hair piled on her head, tendrils softly draping down to sweep across a bare shoulder. My heart thuds in my chest when she pauses and turns in the direction of the house. Her eyes drift toward the window where I stand as if she senses my whereabouts. I quickly pull back out of sight.

  When I look again, I see our closest friends standing with Elliot. Ace, his only best man in my absence and his brother-in-law, Pete Roman, are by his side.

  It seems like a happy evening from what I can decipher from twenty-five feet in the air, but I feel the impact of my absence all the same. I should be standing beside my best friend instead of hiding in the shadows, where only Elliot and Ace know I’m watching from.

  Courtney’s stepfather Bobby who raised her, and, Kyle her biological dad stand before Elliot and he reaches out to shake each of their hands. Then, as they begin to say their vows, I notice the shaking of Jordan’s shoulders. She’s crying.

  Jordan’s tears are not ones of joy, they’re over a lost chance at happiness and her sister’s nuptials only accentuate her loss. The one that I’m responsible for. Before I know what’s happening, I feel something wet splash onto my hand and when I look down, I realize that I’m crying tears along with her, one’s due to the biggest mistake of my life and I’m beginning to worry that it won’t be as easy to repair things with her as I had thought.

  I watch as the crowd cheers and the newlywed’s kiss turns into groping until they’re almost physically pulled apart for the unity portion of the ceremony. Elliot and Courtney tie a knot in a rope, carve their names in the tree, then enjoy a champagne toast and a meal by candlelight.

  As the dancing begins, I gather the few things I have with me in the attic and leave. I make my way through the house unnoticed and send a request for an Uber to meet me at the corner of the street.

  I’m almost in the clear when I hear the voice belonging to the last person I want to see.

  Tony.

  “Hey,” he calls to my retreating back. “You trying to find the bathroom? I’ve been getting lost in this house since I got here.”

  I roll my eyes as I turn to face the man that is possibly my competition. “I’m not lost,
I’m leaving.”

  He nods. “Oh, yeah. Wedding shit is boring as fuck to me too, but this one went pretty good.”

  “Well.”

  “What?”

  I hold back my explanation. “Nothing,” I say with a smirk.

  “What really sucks is that the whole point of going to weddings is to get laid, you know. Usually, girls are all weepy and thinking that it’ll never happen for them. Easy lays, am I right?”

  Is he under the misconception that Jordan is an easy lay? If so, I’m almost tempted to bait him just to hear what happens if he proceeds to try for sex with her under those terms.

  Jordan would hand him his balls.

  It reminds me of what happened between us in the beginning and I shift myself in my pants at the aching memory.

  I had been muddling through a dry spell after coming to terms with Courtney turning me down and her being in love with Elliot. I’d thrown myself into a job working for Courtney’s brother’s girl and had pushed my sex drive to the back burner.

  And then I met her.

  Courtney and I walked into a restaurant to meet her brother Joey, and Morgan and my eyes locked on the striking girl sitting on the booth seat across from them. I was immobilized, except for my eyes that raked up and down Courtney’s barely twenty-year-old sister who was visiting New York after a grueling semester in college.

  Eye fucking her was wrong, but for the first time in my life, I found myself not wanting to be right.

  And Jordan was no innocent bystander in my game of seduction. She had somehow managed to heave her cleavage and prop her spectacular tits right up under her neck, tumbling them out of her too tight shirt, while she eye fucked me right back.

  My cock swelled to a painful level when the little minx had begun to bat her curled eyelashes up and down while running a finger over her bottom lip.

  That finger drew my eyes to her mouth, and I could think of nothing else but sinking my dick deep into the wet heat between her lips.

  I smirked when I heard Courtney murmur to her brother, “This won’t end well. He looked at me like that once…right before he fucked me and Bridget on my desk…at work.”