books 1 - 3

by Ella J. Smyth

  “Some years before you were born, a German writer wrote a book called Krabat.”

  Adi nodded. Her grandmother had given her the book when she was seven years old. She’d maybe been a little young for it, but she remembered the story well. A boy had been apprenticed to a miller who later turned out to be an evil sorcerer. And now that she remembered it, there’d been a challenge in that story. Weren’t the miller’s apprentices all turned into ravens, and the girl had to pick out her lover from the lineup?

  Adi looked sharply at the queen, who nodded in satisfaction that Adi had figured it out.

  “That’s right. In the story, Krabat was chosen by his girlfriend, and he was saved. I doubt your feelings for your lover are strong enough to save him.”

  With a flourish, the queen turned away and pointed at a row of guards, who parted at her gesture. Adi had to squint to make out what was happening, but then her eyes widened. There were seven wolves in a row, all of them black. Adi couldn’t see the color of their eyes, but with a sinking heart, she knew they would be sapphire blue.

  Then she brightened a little when she remembered that Honi had been in a pitiful state. She hadn’t seen any other wolves in the dungeon, so maybe she could pick out the most injured, weakest wolf and be lucky. She wasn’t so naive as to think that her feelings would point towards the right creature. That wasn’t how life worked.

  The queen waited. Adi pulled herself up, and gathered the last scraps of courage. She looked her square in the eyes and said, “Fine. Let’s do this.”

  With a snap of her finger, the queen gathered the guards and the animals. Soon the seven wolves were lined up right in front of Adi, some sitting on their haunches, some lying down, mouths open, tongues hanging out, like well-behaved Alsatians.

  There was a wildness about them that betrayed the fact that these were not domesticated animals. They might be under the queen’s spell, but they weren’t pets. Adi had a vision of petting the first wolf on his head and having her arm ripped off for her effort. She gulped again.

  At first glance, the wolves sitting in a row in front of her were absolutely identical—same size, all male, same length of fur. She decided to have a closer look. As Adi walked slowly up and down, the animals became a little agitated. Soon most of them were on their legs, some growling, others on high alert.

  She was pretty certain that they wouldn’t attack her in front of the queen. That surely would have been a breach of her agreement with the ruler. Fighting down her instinctive fear of the large predators who reached as high up as her waist, she approached the first one.

  As she bent down to examine him closer, the wolf pushed against her. So he was being playful, she thought, pushing back while stroking his head. As if that gesture had encouraged him, the animal’s head swung around, and he stuck his nose into her crotch.

  Good grief, what was it with this place? Everybody seemed to take the opportunity to grope her whenever they had a chance, even the animals! Frowning, she pushed his head away.

  The wolf’s blue eyes were grinning at her, and for a moment she considered calling off the challenge, because surely, only Honi was cheeky enough to try this on with her in front of the queen. Then common sense prevailed, and she moved on to the next wolf.

  This animal’s hackles rose, and he growled so aggressively that Adi was sure that no way was that Honi. She held out her hand, just to see how he would react, and sure enough, the predator snapped at her so quickly that had he been serious about wanting to hurt her, her hand would have been gone. She gasped and jumped back before shaking her head and moving on.

  The third wolf was incredibly listless. Everything about him demonstrated his helplessness, defeat, tiredness. His tail, his head, even his ears hung down. Adi felt unsure again. Given the treatment she’d witnessed, this might have been Honi. When she’d seen him last, he’d been in a desperate state. So maybe this animal was her ex-boyfriend.

  She moved through the rest of the wolves, stretching out her hand, allowing them to lick it or snarl at her, or whatever they wanted to do. By the time she’d reached the end of the row, she was more confused than before. There were four wolves in the lineup of seven that might have been Honi, but she just couldn’t be sure.

  Well, maybe it was time to use some of her fairy tale knowledge. As she turned around to ask if she could go again, she was faced with an expression of such triumph on the queen’s face that it pissed her off. She would show that bitch that she could do this, and she certainly didn’t have to ask for permission to do whatever it took to pick out her boyfriend from that ridiculous lineup.

  Vaguely, she noted how easily she’d moved in her thoughts from ex-boyfriend to boyfriend. Nothing like mortal danger to rekindle passion. Adi pushed the thought away. Not the time, not the place.

  She marched back to the first of the animals and closed her eyes. Her breathing calmed as she’d practiced so many times over the last year, and she slipped into a state of relaxation. Briefly, she marveled at how she was able to be so cool in front of her mortal enemy and her entire court while her own life was on the line. Now she understood why Honi had drilled her again and again, and his lessons were certainly paying off.

  She imagined being surrounded by calm waters, maybe on a boat in the middle of a lake. She visualized the sparkling smooth surface, like glass, shimmering, peaceful. When she felt ready, she opened her eyes again and listened with her mind.

  Slowly, she walked past the assembled animals. She felt nothing until she walked towards number five. A pull emanated from him, drawing her forward. Before she could change her mind, she stretched out a hand and pointed.

  “This one,” she said.

  When she turned around, the queen looked at her impassively. “Are you sure? Remember what’s at stake here.”

  Adi stared defiantly at her enemy. The queen obviously wasn’t above trying to put her off, just so that she could win.

  “I’m sure. This one,” she repeated calmly.

  “As you wish.” The ruler of all Faerie pointed her finger at the wolf in front of Adi and drew a complicated sigil in the air. In front of their eyes, the animal disappeared and in his stead crouched a person.

  Adi’s eyes grew wide, and her indrawn breath betrayed her agitation. The man in front of her looked awful, obviously a victim of torture. His skin was covered in bruises, both old and fresh. His eyes held so much pain that Adi’s heart cramped as she looked at him. He was in much the same position as the wolf had been just seconds earlier. But it wasn’t Honi.

  Adi stared at him in utter disbelief. She’d been so sure! Her eyes still fixed on Florice, they began to burn. The queen had won. Somehow, she had managed to manipulate Adi into picking the wrong wolf. Adi fell to her knees as the consequence of her error hit her like a two-by-four.

  Honi would remain a wolf for the rest of his life, tortured and abused at the queen’s pleasure. And as for Adi? She had forfeited her life, as per their agreement. Tears were flowing freely from her eyes as she lowered her head and sobbed. She was so wrapped up in her misery that she didn’t even register the cruel laughter until it sounded right next to her ear.

  When Adi lifted her head, the queen towered over her, her face contorted in triumph.

  “Well, now, Adi. Isn’t that an unexptected turn of events? It looks like your arrogance may have cost your life.”

  When she didn’t respond, the faerie queen grabbed her hair in a tight grip and pulled Adi’s head up. The pain was intense—so sharp that it cut through the cloak of bleak emotion that she’d wrapped herself in.

  Arrogance? Yes, maybe she had been arrogant. She’d actually believed that she would be able to beat the queen, and this was the second time that she’d been proven wrong. Adi had no pride left. She looked into the swirling white eyes of the queen and begged.

  “Please, you’ve won. I don’t care what happens to me, but please, let Honi go! He’s never done anything wrong. He’s accepted his lot as a spirit walker, and all he ever
did was try to teach me how to do the same.”

  The queen smirked again. “You’re right, Adi. Honi has always done the right thing, except when he helped you defeat me in the spirit world. And now he’s mine.”

  She turned away and snapped her fingers. Then she called out to the assembled faeries.

  “Let’s proceed!”

  34

  Two armed guards approached swiftly and grabbed Adi by the elbows. They pulled her to her feet as if she weighed nothing. This was it, then. After everything she’d been through, this was how she would die.

  As she hung motionless between the two large warriors, the queen regarded her thoughtfully.

  “You know, Adi, you have impressed me. I’m inclined to—”

  Then everything happened really quickly. Florice twisted towards one of the guards and grabbed a spear off him. He turned back towards Adi and the queen, his wide-open eyes crazed with rage and pain. Adi had no clue if he meant to throw the weapon at her or the queen. Either way, his arm drew back, and the spear came flying towards them.

  Adi couldn’t move, frozen to the spot in shock. Her eyes tracked the path of the sharp object flying towards her, and her mouth opened to scream. She didn’t have time for the sound to form.

  Just as she was convinced that the spear would pierce her chest, a black shape slammed into her. Before she registered what was happening, the deadly tip connected with a wolf’s solid bulk.

  Time moved again. Adi looked down, and the wolf, who had surely saved her life, lay on his side, breathing shallowly. His tongue was lolling out of his mouth, and his eyes rolled back in his head. The weapon had gone through the side of the animal and pinned his body to the ground. Adi didn’t need to be a vet to know that this was a mortal wound.

  She stared at the wolf in shock, whispering, “Oh no.” At a barked order, the guards had overpowered Florice, and his position between two of the giant faeries mirrored the hold they’d had on her earlier.

  35

  Before Honi knew what was happening, rough hands pulled him to his feet. His leash was taken off, and he was made to walk. He was too exhausted to take much note of his surroundings. She won’t be coming back. It’s too late.

  He didn’t know what to expect, but it couldn’t be good. To his surprise, he didn’t end up in another dank cell. His nose twitched as the sharp, fresh scent of grass hit it. When he stopped in bewilderment, a heavy slap reminded him that he was still a prisoner. His legs gave way again, but this time, the guard whispered to him, “Come on, human, you survived this long. Don’t give up now.”

  Honi was so shocked by the encouragement that he staggered another distance before giving up. He collapsed in a panting heap, dimly aware of how soft the grass was under his empty belly.

  Time passed strangely to his wolf mind. He’d lost all track of how long he might have been lying there, waiting for something to happen. There were more faeries around him, he knew that. He could smell their strange wintry scent, sharp and irritating.

  Eventually, something seemed to be happening. People whispered, and there was a commotion amongst the faeries assembled around him. Then, cutting through the dense miasma emanating from so many bodies, he recognized a particular scent. Adi. A jumble of sweet flower perfume, tempered by amber and cinnamon.

  As a human, he had only ever been aware that she smelled good. As a wolf, his nose recognized the layers and layers of emotions, life experiences, and intentions that made her human, that made her who she was.

  He would have jumped up to his feet and wagged his tail like a dog if he’d had the strength. As it was, he could only lift his head and look for her. When his eyes finally found her, she looked like a warrior. He smelled fear on her, but also determination. She was flanked by two sentries on either side, her head held high and her spirit unbroken.

  He kept staring at her, content to have her in his field of vision. She hadn’t noticed him because there was a row of faerie guards between them. He could see her clearly through their legs, though.

  After a while, other wolves lined up next to him. Some of them smelled natural, wild, like predators. Others had the same kind of wrongness about them as he did. He wondered for a brief moment what was going on, but the warmth of the sunshine on his fur, the underlying, ever-present ache of his injuries, his empty stomach, made it impossible for him to concentrate for any length of time.

  Then the guards moved, and Adi walked towards him. His every instinct demanded that he go to her, lick her hand. He tried so hard to gather the energy to move, only to find that he couldn’t.

  He was frozen in the position he was in, stretched out over his forepaws, his head on the ground. He couldn’t even open his mouth and snake his tongue out. The queen had taken everything from him, including his free will to move. Even a burst of impotent anger when one of the animals sniffed at Adi and stuck his snout in her crotch couldn’t raise him.

  And then everything happened really quickly. One moment he was tied to the ground by invisible ties, the next he was free. Just in time to notice the danger that Adi was in. One of the strange-wrong wolves changed back to a person, grabbed a spear from the guard next to him and flung it directly at Adi.

  Honi had no conscious memory of what happened next. His body acted entirely on instinct, and he knew that if he’d been human, he could have never gotten there in time. A strong blow hit his midriff. Then he felt a piercing pain like he’d never felt before.

  As he lay on the ground, he fought, trying to make sense of what had happened. His animal brain told him to surrender, to endure—that this was the best way to make the agony go away. His human instinct told him that he needed to understand what had happened to him. Otherwise he was lost.

  One thing that both his human and animal mind agreed on was that he was in big trouble. He tried to push himself up but couldn’t. This time it wasn’t due to some mind control tricks by the queen; he was pinned, physically pinned to the ground.

  Every time he twitched, the terrible pain increased. Every time he stopped moving, it dialed down to a throb—unpleasant, but bearable. Maybe the smart thing was to just lie still and take account of his injuries.

  He remembered hearing a scream before he went down hard. He recognized the voice as Adi’s. He wasn’t sure what she had to scream about, given that he was the one who was hurt. He opened his eyes. There was something wrong with his vision. The sun had disappeared behind thick clouds.

  That must be it, he thought. What else would explain the darkness that grew bigger in front of his eyes. He was so tired. There was something wedged in his chest that no amount of coughing could dislodge. Just as he decided to try and maybe have a nap so that the dull throbbing might stop, his head was yanked off the ground. He tried to protest, but instead of sound, a gush of liquid filled his mouth. He spat it out in order to be able to draw a breath.

  He regretted it immediately. He really shouldn’t have done that. Breathing deeply hurt more than anything beforehand. Honi focused inward, trying to find a way to breathe so that his chest didn’t feel like it was turning itself inside out.

  Long moments later, just as the pain receded again, his nose picked up Adi’s scent. He turned his head, and yes, he was supported on her lap. He signed with relief. He didn’t know why he wasn’t panicking more. Whatever had happened had wounded him so badly that he couldn’t get up, and breathing was impossible. Gushes of blood leaving his body made him feel weaker and weaker.

  The throbbing had subsided, and he had his mate back. Maybe that was why he wasn’t more concerned. He noticed that his mate wasn’t happy to be with him. It upset him a little. She shouted, the pitch of her voice sounding more and more desperate.

  Honi moved his head, trying to snuggle up to her because he felt very cold. And then the sun set, because all light and warmth disappeared from the earth. He closed his eyes and allowed the darkness to wash over him.

  36

  Adi fell to her knees. Her trembling fingers brushed the fur on
the animal’s head, and dread threatened to overwhelm her. There was only one reason why this particular wolf would have thrown himself between her and certain death.

  His eyes rolled back in his skull, his breathing sounding more and more labored. She had to know.

  “Honi?”

  At the sound of her voice, just as he’d done in the cell, his tongue snuck out of his open mouth and licked her fingertips. Then his body began to shake so hard as if he was vibrating out of existence.

  In her panic, she shouted, “Please, save him! He doesn’t deserve this!”

  Her vision blurred with tears, and she couldn’t stop touching Honi. A hand fell on her shoulder, and when she looked up, the queen was standing right next to her.

  There was something in her eyes that Adi had not seen before. A new emotion other than the rage, hatred, and disdain she’d become used to.

  “That human fool. I had not counted on him doing something so stupid.” She sighed. “Oh, well. It can’t be helped now.”

  As Adi cradled the dying wolf’s head on her lap, sobbing into his fur while his blood soaked the ground around her, the queen murmured something inaudible.

  One second Adi and Honi were on the ground, the next the grass under Adi’s knees disappeared and was replaced by cold, hard flagstones. As she looked down, Honi exhaled a ragged, stuttering breath, and then… nothing.

  Adi’s world stopped. For a moment, all movement, all sound ceased. Honi’s eyes were fixed on her, and she saw the instant they broke. One second, the pain was tangible in his sapphire eyes, the next, she stared at emptiness where there had once been a living, breathing being.

  Adi took a deep breath and with the next exhale wailed her sorrow and grief into the world, not giving a shit about who heard her. As she inhaled to scream again, the queen clapped her hands together hard in front of Adi’s face.