by Nancy Naigle
She wouldn’t be here forever, anyway.
“Maeve?” Becky had walked up to her. “I thought that was you. It is so good to see you. It’s been eons. You look great.”
“Thank you. I see you’re holding down the fort here.”
“Doing my best. I don’t know how Kimmy does it, keeping so many details about all this equipment in her head like she does. Frankly, I’m not sure I’m even helping.”
“I’m sure you are. How is she?”
“You must’ve heard.” Becky’s signature red-lipstick smile faded. She pushed back a wayward strand of hair. “I’m trying not to worry.”
It didn’t look to Maeve like Becky was succeeding. “Someone at the diner mentioned something about her being in the hospital. Twins?”
“Yes, twins. Can you believe it?” She blinked as if she were still trying to believe it. “Doesn’t run in either of their families. Surprise!”
“Very exciting. Does she know if they’ll be boys, girls? One of each?”
“No. She didn’t want to find out. The doctor assured her they’re healthy, and I guess that’s all that matters. She’s been on bed rest, though, and you know how hard it is to keep Kimmy still. They finally put her in the hospital to manage her blood pressure, but I can’t help but worry about my little girl.” Becky glanced around, then took Maeve by the hand. “Oh gosh, did you hear? I found one of those shells. I’ve always silently wondered over the years if that was a real thing.”
She tugged Maeve toward the counter. There, next to a bucket of colored zinc to protect the real sun warriors from skin cancer, sat the shell.
Almost fluorescent pink inside, the big conch looked polished.
Maeve reached out and touched it. The words had worn in places, but she could still make them out:
I can’t wait to be with you,
but until then know that I’m gathering
treasures and stories to share.
Becky clutched Maeve’s arm. “Isn’t that crazy? I mean, you can practically hear Kimmy say something like that.” Becky’s face lit up as she picked up the shell, cradling it in her thin hands. “I was a basket case until I found this. It made me feel so much better about the whole situation.”
Maeve leaned in and gave Becky a squeeze. “That does seem to fit the current circumstance.”
“What kind of shell is it? I knew you’d be able to tell me.”
“It’s a conch. Quite easy to find down in Florida, especially these with the pretty pink inside. Once in a while we’ll find them around here, but often they’ve had a rough trip. They’re seldom in this kind of shape.”
“Won’t it be cute in the nursery? It’ll be such a neat story to tell them. Kimmy’s been so anxious for those babies to be born. I can’t wait to hold them and squeeze them.” Becky looked like she could burst from all the joy.
“You’re going to be a wonderful grandmother.” Maeve hugged her, then paused. “I have to ask. Where did you find the shell?”
“That’s the craziest part. I’d gone down to the pier to give Kimmy’s husband, Nate, an update on her condition, and while I was waiting for him to paddle in, there it was, right in the sand by the pylon. It was the bright pink that caught my eye.”
“Right there at the pier? That’s amazing.” Maeve was surprised she hadn’t seen it herself.
“Some people are such skeptics. This lady yesterday just about accused me of writing the message myself. I told her this wasn’t the first shell someone had found around here.”
“Don’t let her bother you. That shell was found by the right person at the right time. Everything is going to be fine. I just know it.” It is a wonder how those shells make their way into the hands that need them most.
She looked up at Becky, knowing how precious Kimmy was to her. “May I leave a little note for Kimmy?”
“She’d love that. You know how much she adores you. You were one of her biggest fans when she was actively competing.”
Maeve wrote a note wishing Kimmy well and reminding her how lucky the twins would be to share her love for the beach and the ocean by living on Whelk’s Island. “Let me know when she’s accepting visitors. I’d love to see her. I’m so happy for the whole family.”
“Thank you, Maeve. I’d better get back to those customers and see if I can salvage a sale to pay for those twins. They require a ton of stuff.”
Maeve walked out of the surf shop with joy bubbling in her heart. Kimmy would be fine. The heavenly shade of pink in that shell only confirmed what she’d been thinking since she found her own pink treasures down on the beach earlier: twin girls.
Whelk’s Island was growing, and in a good way.
10
That evening, Amanda rearranged the kitchen. There was no reason not to use the space she’d had built for her business. They could use the room for a homework station for Hailey or more storage. She regretted not having done enough research and planning to pass the inspection required for a cottage food business in the first place.
Rookie mistake. Jack would have never missed that detail.
Dried herbs had seemed like such an easy option, and she loved working with them. Even though she’d made certain she could partition Denali’s access from the kitchen area she planned for her business, it was a direct violation for him to be in the house at all.
She thought of rehoming Denali, but she couldn’t deprive the kids of him. Jack had specifically picked out that dog for them. It was their last gift from him. She wouldn’t give up her dream, though. Somehow, someday, she’d figure out a way to make it happen.
The kids were still playing in their room, so she took advantage of the extra time to package dried herbs, then jar some of the new salt she’d made. In a couple of weeks, she’d try it on a few dishes.
She hoped for good results. If nothing else, her family ate well. She was proud of herself for not letting her kids live on hot dogs, chicken nuggets, and macaroni and cheese. That in itself was a win.
Jack used to tease her that she’d have inventory to supply the world before she ever sold the first jar if she didn’t start advertising them. The plan had been to take the different mixes to the farmers market as a testing ground, but that was the summer Jack never came home. Another year had passed since then, and here she was still experimenting.
She lifted her chin as she often did when she spoke to Jack. “I’ll sell them one day.”
It wouldn’t be this year, but she’d find a way to rent a space that met the state requirements. For now, she could give the salts as Christmas gifts to the new friends she’d make at work. And she’d concentrate on designing the website. Those were things she could do now, and maybe even build up some early reviews and clientele.
The thought of new people in her life warmed her. She picked up one of the jars. Elegant yet simple. She and Jack had looked through the catalog many times before making a decision. Even coming up with the recipes to test each new flavor was backed by hours of thought and methodical measurement. A flash of a memory—Jack sitting there, pretending to be nervous about trying yet another dish. Then slowly savoring each bite as serious as a judge on one of those cooking shows.
She put a lot of work into coming up with good recipes to use her herbal salts in, and Jack had been a big part of that. She sank into the loving memory for a moment. Enjoying it. He’d always been her biggest cheerleader.
Recipe cards! Why hadn’t she made that connection before? She could offer a monthly subscription service. There are opportunities here. No, I won’t give up the dream, Jack.
Amanda grabbed a notebook and jotted down the ideas. How she wished she’d been able to make it happen this year. Everything will fall into place when it is supposed to.
She climbed on the step stool and tucked the new batch in the cupboard. Jars filled the shelves of the double c
abinet.
She took three different jars down from the cabinet shelf: one sweet, a citrus, and a savory blend. She placed them on the counter. They might make a nice gift for Maeve. If she cooked. She couldn’t really picture the older woman dawdling around in the kitchen in those snap-up cotton shifts old ladies wore. No, Maeve, even on the beach, was always in vivid colors. Gauzy flowing fabrics that moved like the surrounding weather. She seemed like a free spirit who loved nature. Someone who’d pick lazing in a hammock outside over a day in the kitchen wearing an apron.
There was something about Maeve that made Amanda want to learn more about her.
Maybe it was the confidence with which she moved. Her independence. Or the dedication to what she loved—being on the beach, rain or shine. Or simply that she’d been kind enough to stop and chat with Hailey and Jesse. Maeve hadn’t been the least put out by their interruption. In fact, she’d seemed delighted, charmed even, by them. Amanda loved how Maeve had stomped her foot into the surf and splashed Jesse back. So unexpected and playful. Amanda wished she could be that carefree and spontaneous.
Smiling at the thought, she fashioned a ribbon around bunches of lavender, rosemary, and thyme and wrapped them and the herb-infused salts in a length of unbleached muslin for Maeve. She’d deliver them later. But now it was getting late and she needed to put the kids to bed.
After Hailey and Jesse had brushed their teeth and changed into pajamas, Amanda knelt next to the bunk beds and squeezed her eyes tight. Her two angels started their prayer.
“Now my lay me…”
Those little voices grabbed her heart. Such a big job to do all the right things by them, by herself. Don’t let me mess them up. Some days I can barely take care of me. As usual, Jesse yawned before they could get through the whole thing. There were a few times when he’d been fast asleep before Hailey said amen.
She kissed them each on the forehead. “I love you with all my heart.”
She let out a breath with the click of the bedroom door.
We’re all safe. I made it through another day.
As Amanda climbed into her own bed, she thought of the message in the lip of her shell: “All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” Jack’s shirt hanging on her chair still tethered her to life these days.
I’ll know when it’s time.
She quietly recited her prayers, adding one new name to the list tonight. Maeve.
* * *
—
Maeve had been so distracted thinking of Kimmy and her soon-to-be arrivals that she nearly missed Amanda and the kids leaving the library.
“Hello!” Maeve said. “What a nice surprise.”
“Hey. Hailey was just talking about you again.”
“Really?” Maeve rubbed her ear, teasing with Hailey.
“Good things,” Hailey said.
“She checked out a book about North Carolina shells so she could learn about them.”
“You are absolutely precious,” she said to Hailey, who beamed.
“There are a lot of pictures in here too. I’m going to try to collect one of everything.”
“My. That will be quite the adventure. It could take a long time.”
“Will you help me?”
“Of course. I’d love to.”
“I got Clifford the Big Red Dog.” Jesse lifted the book in the air, showing it off. “Ruff ruff bowwow.”
“My daddy used to read that to me when I was a little girl,” Hailey said with all the confidence of a teenager rather than a six-year-old. “I told Jesse it’s a good book. He’s going to love it.” She leaned in, lowering her voice. “Hopefully, Mom can do the voices right. Daddy was so good at it, but he’s not here.”
Hailey glanced at Amanda, almost as if she were worried her mom may have overheard.
Maeve wondered what the rest of the story was.
Amanda’s cheeks were as red as the brightly colored dog on the cover of Jesse’s library book. She lowered her head, looking everywhere except at Maeve.
“I’ll do my best.” Amanda sounded playful, but Maeve caught the overzealous tone that didn’t ring quite sincere.
Amanda swallowed so hard that Maeve thought the young lady might choke. Poor thing. I recognize the hurt behind those pretty eyes. “Everyone tells a story in their own special way. I bet it will be different but every bit as special.”
Hailey seemed to think about it for a second. “You’re probably right.” She reached for her mother’s hand.
“Thank you, Hailey.” Amanda brushed her hair back over her shoulder. “Why don’t you and your brother go sit on a bench over there in the reading garden and look at your books. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
Hailey took Jesse’s hand and together they ran through the gate.
There was a nervous laugh, followed by a sigh, and then Amanda turned and faced Maeve. “It’s not easy when a marriage ends. The kids—”
“They’re resilient, and yours are just fine. More than fine. I can feel their joy from a distance. Don’t you worry.”
“Well, I…we moved here for a fresh start.”
“You made a wonderful choice.” Maeve eyed her, wishing she’d tell her more. She’d always been a good listener, but it was harder to listen when folks wouldn’t share the words. “Whelk’s Island is a happy place. Sure, it’s gotten busier over the years, but the true locals are a rare and wonderful lot. This community still embraces old-fashioned traditions, and I have a feeling you’re going to fit right in and be very happy here.”
“I sure can use some happiness. I’m so tired of being sad.”
“Honey, unfortunately no life is free of sadness, be it from pain, loss, illness, or…well, you get the idea. It’s all a necessary part of a life well lived.”
“Seems like there’d be an easier way.”
“Not our place to say, is it?”
Amanda raised her eyes. “All in His time. Is that what you’re going to say?”
“You know as well as I, but the ocean is a great stabilizer. I think being here helps make things easier to understand. Some people think that when life is good, it’s like the tide flowing in and when it’s bad, it’s like the tide going out. I don’t personally see it that way.”
She glanced over at Amanda’s children. They hung close to each other, heads down, enjoying the books. “Want to know what I think? I believe we need both the good and the bad, just like the ocean needs the fluctuating tides.”
“Balance.” Amanda said it barely above a whisper.
“If the tide only ever came in, we would drown. Well, I guess technically we could live on boats, but you know what I mean. When the tide goes out, we get to appreciate the treasures it reveals. And when it comes in, new life is washed ashore. There’s beauty in both.”
“Like your shells.” Amanda’s head cocked slightly to the left.
The metaphor had landed on her the way Maeve had suspected it might.
“Exactly.” Maeve took in a breath of satisfaction.
“If we only had good, we’d never appreciate how good it was. I understand that. But sometimes the bad outweighs the good by so much.” Amanda bowed her head again.
“Sometimes it feels like that. I’ve sure been there, but as the journey continues, you will always find balance. That I promise you. You’re still very young. There is a lot more good coming your way. Be patient, and believe.”
“I’m glad we crossed paths.”
Maeve gulped back an unexpected rush of emotion. “My goodness, you have no idea the joy meeting you and your children has brought me. You know, I never had children of my own.”
“Really? That surprises me. You’re so wonderful with them. Especially Jesse.”
Maeve couldn’t hide her delight. “Hailey is like talking to an adult, if that’s wh
at you mean, but I love deciphering Jesse. He’s such an animated little communicator.”
“He’s a good boy.” Amanda glanced over at her children, a look of love in her eyes.
“You’re a good mother. I can see that.”
“They make it easy.” Amanda stood there quietly.
Maeve started toward the reading garden, not wanting to intrude on whatever was going through Amanda’s mind just then.
A moment later, Amanda fell into step behind her. They walked into the garden, which was really a series of raised flower beds, each containing a tree surrounded by flowers the local master gardeners maintained for the library. Curved cement benches were placed throughout. It was quite cozy, even if it was just a small space between a couple of buildings.
Maeve sat on the bench adjacent to where Hailey and Jesse sat on the ground. They flipped through his book on the bench as if it were a table. Amanda peered over them.
“Hi, Mom.” Hailey turned the page. “I’m telling Jesse all about the story.”
“She used to be able to recite the whole book by heart,” Amanda said to Maeve. “If we tried to end the story early or skip a part, she’d call us out on it.”
“I can picture that,” Maeve said.
Hailey sat back on her heels in a fit of giggles. “I did that?”
“You sure did.”
Hailey reached out and touched the end of Maeve’s big toe. Her eyes lifted, like a frightened doe, as if she hadn’t realized she’d actually done it.
Maeve took pleasure in the precious child’s curiosity. Hailey’s skin was beginning to tan, making her blond hair look even lighter in contrast. Maeve wiggled her toes, and Hailey’s giggle rose into the air like the wings of colorful butterflies, sending waves of delight through Maeve. This is when not having children was the hardest—these magical moments that she’d missed. She’d convinced herself all this time that her marriage to Jarvis had been full in other ways, but at this moment, she was certain there wasn’t anything quite as delightful as that kind of laughter.