by Nancy Naigle
“How can you be so sure?”
“I found one of those shells with a message,” Maeve responded matter-of-factly.
“You did?”
“Yes. It said, ‘Say goodbye to the past, because it’s time to move on.’ My doctor had already told me it was time to get some help. I knew he was right. The shell just confirmed it.”
Amanda looked to heaven. Why do You have to take everything I love?
“Is Paul with the children?”
“No, I left them with Tug.”
“Paul’s a very good man. Just let things happen, honey. It’ll all work out as it should. You’re not driving this party bus.” She looked up to the sky. “He knows what He’s doing.”
“I know, but things are starting to get back to normal for me. I know it’s selfish, but what if he changes his mind? What if he realizes it’s guilt? He has that huge company to run, and we’ll keep him from that good work.”
“Amanda, he has capacity for you and those lovely children along with his good works. He’s sincere.”
“He wants to fix everything for me. That sounds like guilt. When I told him about the hiccup with getting my business started, he said he’d give me space in Paws Town Square to do it. Just hand it to me. That’s nuts.”
“Or love.” Maeve patted Amanda’s hand. “If I let you live here so you can run your business from the cottage, is that any different?”
She stopped. “Yes, it would be totally different.”
“How? I want to fix a problem for you, because I love you and want to help.”
“I don’t know.” She closed her eyes.
“You are very special, Amanda. Paul’s gesture is from the same place as mine. From the heart. Please allow me this one pleasure.”
Amanda sat quietly, tears falling down her face. “I will really miss you.”
“I feel the same way. You know,” Maeve said, looking around the sunroom, “this is Hailey’s favorite room in the house. She wandered in here that afternoon we made lunch together. I told her the room would be our secret. You should’ve seen her shine in here.” Maeve pointed to the beautiful apothecary jar of sea glass on the windowsill. “She was so drawn to the sea glass in that jar. I’d like to be sure she gets that. I’m tying up loose ends this week.”
“I can see why she loved it in here. It’s almost…unreal the way the colors and textures fill the space.”
“We had such a sweet talk. She’s a brilliant child. You’ve been a dear friend, Amanda. You’ve had an impact on the way I live, and I’ve loved having you to talk to.”
Amanda could feel the winds of change in the air.
Maeve’s voice softened. “Don’t be too hard on Paul. He wants to be there for you for the right reasons.”
“And if it turns out to be guilt?”
Maeve sputtered, “That man has enough money to give you a big fat check if that’s all it is. Trust me, you don’t go to the lengths that man has gone to for anything but love. His motives are genuine. Now, I don’t know if that means you’ll marry and live happily ever after, but I believe you two will be best friends again. The rest will fall into place. He’s giving you his time, and together you’re sharing the beauty in each day. You’re breathing new joy in each other’s lives.”
“You think I should quit worrying.”
“Which advice do you want? A good ol’ island song?” Maeve sang in an island brogue, “ ‘Don’t worry, be happy now.’ ” With a laugh she added, “Or John 14:27—‘Peace I leave with you’? You know all the things I’ve shared. None of it is news. Why are you so afraid?”
“I don’t think I could live through that kind of loss again.”
“You’ll drown in your own fear. It’ll suck you down like a riptide and tear you apart if you let it. You can’t live a joyful life if you’re paralyzed by fear.”
Amanda nodded.
“We might be an unlikely pair to anyone looking at us, but we’ve kind of rescued each other.” Maeve’s eyes glistened.
“You’ve definitely rescued me,” Amanda said. “There are days when I stand at the waterline where the tide is bringing in the waves and lift my hands in front of me. It’s like Jack is right there with me on our wedding day. I remember being there and the water almost getting to our feet with each wave. Jack held me so I didn’t topple over and get wet. He had strong hands. I always felt so safe with him.”
“There’s a stillness in the house without your husband there,” Maeve said.
“Yes. Some nights the kids are snuggled under their blankets, unaware of the weight of the world that I’m trying to carry for them, but I have to do it.”
“You don’t have to do it alone, though. Let Paul help. And, Amanda, let your parents in. Even if you have to board Denali and go to them, you do it.”
“I hear you. I do. But, Maeve, you don’t have to leave Whelk’s Island. I feel closer to you than I do to my own mother. I can take care of you.”
“No. No ma’am. I want you to take care of you and your children and Paul. And Tug. Watch over that old fool for me.”
“Maeve—”
“This isn’t negotiable. I promised my baby sister I’d do this. I owe it to her. She’ll worry herself to death if I don’t. A promise is a promise, and it’s time. We made the plan long ago with cool heads. It’s the right thing to do. I’m not afraid.”
Amanda could barely take in a real breath. “No. It can’t be your time.” She sucked in another gulp. “You’re healthier than half the people under fifty around here.”
“I’m tired.” Maeve smiled, her teeth showing and her nose wrinkling as she lowered her lashes. “The trumpets will sound and there will be light, and no pain, and my Jarvis is going to be as handsome as he ever once was. I know exactly how it will feel to see him and to hold his hand again.”
Amanda understood. It was the little things. Holding hands. The forehead kisses. The towel snap after cleaning the kitchen. That teary glance as they tucked their children into bed.
“Excuse me.” The helper brought in two glasses of water. “I don’t mean to disturb. I thought you could use these.”
“Thank you.” Maeve took them and handed one to Amanda. “Take a sip.”
Amanda’s hand shook, causing the ice to clink against the sides of the glass. “Thank you. When do you have to leave?”
“Next Friday. I’ve got some paperwork to get straight, and I need to make some arrangements for Methuselah at Paws Town Square. I trust Paul will make sure he’s taken care of. Poor thing is too old for another home.”
“I can do whatever you need. Please let me help,” Amanda pleaded with her. “Friday?” That was so soon. She already missed her. “Can I help you pack? I could pick up some boxes.”
Maeve shook her head. “I’m taking two suitcases of things. You know what they say, ‘You can’t take it with you,’ so I’ll be leaving most everything behind. My sister is sending a car to pick me up. I’ll just take my suitcases. Maybe a couple of my favorite shells for good measure.”
“I’m stunned. You seem so healthy.” She set the water glass down gently.
“Cancer doesn’t have rules. It can be very sneaky.” Maeve laughed. “It was hard for me to accept for a while, because for so many years after Jarvis passed on, I hoped I wouldn’t wake up in the morning. Then finally when I started living again, I got the death sentence.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“No, don’t be. I’m just being dramatic. I outlasted cancer for a lot longer than anyone expected. I did some treatments years ago, and I’ve bought a lot of time. But now there’s nothing else to try and my organs are wearing out. I’m ready.”
“You’ve certainly made the most of every day.”
“And you should too. I’ve had a lot of wonderful years, but age is finally starting to take its toll,
and that’s okay. I met you and your family, and this summer has been one of my best yet. I’m so thankful I didn’t miss out on that and grateful I was still here to see Kimmy start her family. Good stuff.”
“You’re special to us too.”
“I wasn’t sure how to broach this with you, but since you’re here.”
“Is there something I can do?”
“Well, I know you love your little beach cottage, but this place is bought and paid for many times over. All I pay is the insurance and taxes, and they aren’t all that much. I’d like to offer you this house to raise your children in, or use it however you see fit. Start that business you dreamed of in the cottage. That could work.”
“Maeve, that’s so generous.”
“Not really. Remember, I’m not packing anything up.” She laughed. “It’ll take you three years to dig out of all my junk.”
“So a furnished house, even?” Amanda looked around. “I don’t know what to say. If we did, at least Methuselah could stay here with us. This is home. He knows every inch of the place, and he has routines.”
“Routines are important for the likes of us.”
“I’ll take care of him.” Amanda looked at the wall of windows with the pretty colors streaming through. “We could really live here?”
“It’s not much, but I’d be thrilled to know that a family who loves the beach is here. It’s a good house to grow up in. I know. I did it. There’s plenty of room. I don’t even use the top floor anymore. You could host lots of guests. There are four more bedrooms upstairs. I used one as an office for a long time.”
“Wow.” Amanda’s mind reeled. Things like this didn’t happen to people like her.
“Or maybe instead of using your cottage for your business, you could rent it out and then use the income to continue to be a stay-at-home mom. Or not. Whatever your heart tells you to do. You’re a smart lady. You’ll figure it out. And if you let Paul come into your heart, I know he’ll take wonderful care of you—and he can take care of you very comfortably—without my help. But let me do this for you.”
“Maeve, you’re too kind.”
“If I’d ever had a daughter, I’d have loved her to be exactly like you.” Maeve reached for her hands, taking them into hers. “You’re a caring woman—kindhearted and strong. A wonderful mother. I always thought I’d have been a good mother.”
“You would have. You’re so great with my kids. And me. You’re more of a mom than my own. You have been my redirection.” She sniffled. Tears streamed down her face, but there was no use in brushing them away. There were too many to stop.
“Don’t be sad, honey.”
“You are nothing if not wise. You are going to be a tough act to follow. Hailey is going to live in this sunroom. I’m not ever changing a thing in here.”
“I hope you’ll continue to add your little treasures. It has been a very happy spot for me. I love this room.”
“Are you sure we can’t get a second opinion? More help? I could drive you anywhere.”
“No, this has been a long time coming. I’m ready. I can feel my old body winding down. If I’m lucky, God will answer my prayers and let me go in my sleep. I’ll wake up to Jarvis. He’ll be holding my hand, there in the streaming light in heaven.”
“You make it sound pretty wonderful.”
“You know it will be.”
“You’re right. I do.” She thought about the song that she played over and over, trying to soothe her pain when Jack died. “Knowing what I know about heaven…” Those lyrics reminded her why she shouldn’t be praying him back: he was the one in the better place, and he’d be there for her when her time came.
“I think Hailey and Jesse need to know what’s going on. Do you mind if I tell them?”
“Of course not. They’ve made this summer such a joy for me.”
“What about Tug? He’s worried about you. You’ve got to tell him, or do you want me to?”
Maeve sighed. “I think he knows, but will you ask him to come see me tomorrow morning between the breakfast and lunch crowd? I’ll tell him. I owe him that.”
Amanda stood and wrapped her arms around Maeve. “This sure isn’t what I expected to find today.”
Maeve’s expression softened. “Life is rarely predictable if we’re doing it right.”
* * *
—
Amanda drove over to the diner. Hailey and Jesse were eating ice cream at the counter when she walked in. “No wonder they love you,” she teased.
She nodded for Tug to follow her out to the deck.
“How is she?” he asked.
“I love Maeve,” The Wife said.
“She wants you to come see her tomorrow between the breakfast and lunch crowd.”
His head hung low. “It’s not good. I sensed something was off. I’ve been noticing little differences.”
“I’m sorry.” Amanda wished she could tell him he was wrong. “You really love her, don’t you?”
“More than anything in this world. Always have.”
“Even before she married your best friend?” Amanda cocked her head.
“Definitely.” His eyes glossed with tears. “It’s not right to mess with another man’s woman. I’d never do that. But even the Bible says it’s okay for a widow to remarry. I never could get her to take me serious, though.” He closed his eyes for a moment, then exhaled. “I love Maeve. I’ve lived my whole life trying to make her believe it.”
“Tug, how can that be? You still loved her when she married someone else?”
“Love isn’t simple. It’s not convenient. It’s in here.” He tapped his chest. “In your heart. Your soul. It consumes you. You’d lay your life down for it. Step aside for their happiness. It’s anything but easy, but it’s true.”
“Wow.” Oh my gosh. Paul. She needed to fix things before she ruined them forever. The last thing she wanted was to punish Paul for loving her. “I’ve got to go. You check on Maeve tomorrow and let me know what I can do. Anything.” Amanda pressed her hand to his cheek. “You’re a good man, Tug.” She turned and hurried back inside and rushed the children out the door.
She dialed Paul’s number as they made the short trip home, unable to wait another second to correct the doubt that she’d caused.
Am I walking your same path, Maeve?
The call went straight to voice mail. “Paul, can you come over tonight? It doesn’t matter what time it is. I don’t want to do it over the phone, but I need to talk to you. Please? Thanks, Paul. I’ll see you later.”
26
Paul cursed himself for having missed Amanda’s call. The last thing he wanted was for her to believe that anything came before her in his priorities. He’d been in meetings all day, but still he’d have had time for a quick text at least. The whole drive back to Whelk’s Island, he wanted to call her, to hash out whatever she wanted to talk about, but her message had been adamant. He wanted to respect that.
He pulled in front of her cottage. The living room and kitchen lights were still on.
He walked up to the house and tapped on the screen door.
She jumped from the couch. “I’m so glad you came.”
“Nothing could keep me away. Are you okay?” He walked inside and guided her back to her seat. She looked like she’d been crying. He swept his thumb beneath her eye.
She caught his hand, leaning her chin into it. “Sometimes life can be so confusing.”
“It sure can.” Worry etched his face. “Are Hailey and Jesse okay?”
“They’re fine.”
He let out a long breath. “Thank goodness. My mind has been reeling through a hundred scenarios.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that to you.”
“Can I look in on them?”
“Yeah.” She reached for his hand, and t
hey walked to Jesse’s room together. Paul twisted the doorknob and peeked into the room. Under the soft glow of the night-light, he saw the kids. They lay in tangles of sheets and limbs.
She put her hand on his arm, hugging his bicep. “My precious babies.”
He patted her hand, then backed out of the room, almost holding his breath until the door clicked shut. “Remember that prayer you used to say when Hailey was just a baby? It was so sweet.”
“Oh gosh, I haven’t said that in a long time. Yeah, ‘Two little eyes to look to God…’ is how it started.”
“Yes, that’s the one. I can still hear you saying it softly to her those first times you put her to bed.”
“You were always there for the important moments.”
“I could hear you over the baby monitor when you and Jack went to tuck her in. Your voice was like a melody.”
“I didn’t know you were listening. I’m surprised you remember.”
“Like it was yesterday.”
Amanda walked over to the couch and sat down.
“What’s going on?” He took a seat next to her.
She leaned over and fell into his arms, crying.
“Hey there.” What in the world? He put his arms around her, stroking her shoulders and neck. “What? Whatever it is, we can work it out. Tell me.”
“It’s Maeve.” She sniffed back tears. “She’s dying.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry.” I can’t fix that. “What happened? She seemed fine.”
“Apparently, she’s been sick a long time. Her organs are beginning to fail. Her sister wants her to go to Macon, to let her take care of her until…”
“I’m here for you.” He pulled her closer, caressing her back and planning to sit right there until morning if that’s what she needed.
“The kids love Maeve so much too.” Her tears dampened his shirt, each one a weight on his heart.
“Shh. I know. I hate this. She’s great. Like a grandma.”
“I’m going to have to tell them. She’s leaving next Friday.” She gobbled a sob. “They are going to be so heartbroken.” The tears came with jagged breaths.