The Angel's Song

by Roberta Kagan

  Chapter Fifty-Nine

  May felt as if the small switchboard room on the third floor of the hotel was spinning. She never felt so vulnerable in all of her life.

  “May,” Leo whispered her name again. “I knew. I could tell by your little hands and feet. And I want to say that, well … you’re just so darn cute.” He smiled.

  “You really think so? You don’t think I look like a child?”

  “I think you look like a woman, just a shorter, more compact version.”

  She wiped a tear from her cheek.

  “Will you have dinner with me one night this week?”

  “Yes! Yes!” It was impossible to hide her joy and enthusiasm.

  Stop being so overzealous. You sound like a jerk, she told herself.

  “When are you off work?”

  “Mrs. White, my new boss, just changed my hours again. I have been on three to eleven but now I am back on midnights. I was so glad when she told me she had to switch my hours earlier this afternoon. I don’t start work until eleven at night for the rest of the week. But then I’m off on Monday and Tuesday.”

  “We could have an early dinner tomorrow if that’s okay, or we can wait until Monday. What’s best for you?”

  “When are you off?”

  “I’m off on the weekend. I’ve been at the hotel for a while so although the guys rotate the hours, I always get weekends off.”

  “Tomorrow would be fine, if going out won’t make you too tired to come into work tomorrow night?”

  “I’ll be okay. Tomorrow it is then.”

  The joy bubbled up in her belly and she felt so wonderful that she wanted to giggle out loud. But she contained herself until he left the room. Then she raised her hands in the air and shouted, “Thank you, God!”

  Chapter Sixty

  When May got home the following morning, she found Caroline lying on the bathroom floor. She was drunk and sick to her stomach. She’d been vomiting.

  “What happened here?” May asked. She took a towel off the rack and soaked it in cool water. She knelt beside Caroline and began wiping Caroline’s face.

  “Can you call my job for me and tell them I’m sick and I can’t come into work today?”

  “Sure. Where’s the number?”

  “On the pad right by the phone.”

  After May called Caroline’s job, she helped Caroline into bed. Then May got undressed and washed up.

  She put on her nightgown and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Now tell me what is going on here. I’ve never seen you drink like this.”

  “Tommy got a contract from a record company.”

  “The one you both auditioned for last week?”

  “Yeah, one of them. A big one. They wanted to sign him … but not me.”

  “Oh, Caroline. I’m so sorry.”

  “He’s going on tour. I bet he’s called the coffee shop and already quit his job..”

  “Well, it’s not the end of the world. You can audition at other recording studios.”

  “But now Tommy is gone. He says he will stay in touch …”

  “If he does, he does. If he doesn’t … so what? You are the most beautiful girl I know, Caroline. You’ll meet another fellow. There are lots of fish in the sea, especially for a girl like you.”

  “May,” Caroline was wringing the sheet between her hands. “There’s something I have to tell you.”

  “I’m here. I’m your cousin and your closest friend. Go ahead, talk to me.”

  Caroline took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant.”

  Chapter Sixty-One

  May almost cancelled her date with Leo because Caroline was so distraught. She never saw Caroline behave that way and May was afraid to leave her alone. But Caroline insisted that she go out.

  “I just want to get some rest. And, quite frankly, I prefer to be alone,” Caroline said coldly.

  May didn’t believe her, but she also really wanted to go out with Leo. This would be her first time on a date with a man, so she forced herself to believe that Caroline would be all right and got ready for her evening.

  Leo arrived at the apartment at six wearing a pair of nice slacks and a cotton button-down shirt with a tie. May was dressed in the prettiest dress she owned. Viola had made it for her to wear for graduation but since she hadn’t gone to her graduation, this was the first time she wore it. Leo’s eyes twinkled with genuine approval when he saw May open the door. May had never seen anyone look at her that way before and the feeling was exhilarating. She wondered if this was the way Caroline always felt because the look on Leo’s face was the same look she saw so often on the faces of the boys in Mudwater Creek when they talked to Caroline.

  “You look great,” Leo said smiling.

  “Thanks,” she looked down, blushing.

  “Listen, I know a great little barbeque place right down the road from here. Do you like barbeque?”

  “Sure,” May said as they walked outside. Her hands were trembling as she locked the door. For a moment, she was worried about Caroline. But then Leo put his arm around her shoulder and when he did it took her breath away.

  They walked side by side. For a while, it all felt so wonderful that May thought she might be dreaming. Leo was short for a man but not nearly as short as she. However, he didn’t have to slump down to reach her shoulder. But when they walked by a bus stop with a lot of people waiting, May couldn’t help but notice several of the women staring at them. She hoped Leo didn’t see.

  The restaurant wasn’t very crowded. It had black and white checkered floors, red booths, and a band of three musicians playing a sad country song on a little stage two steps up from the floor in the back of the restaurant. There was a small dance floor where a couple was slow dancing.

  Leo ordered plenty of food—smoked chicken, ribs, and French fries. The food was delicious but May could hardly eat. She was so nervous that it was difficult to swallow. And besides, she didn’t want to spill anything on her special dress.

  “You eat like a bird,” he said.

  “Do I?” she said, not knowing what to say to him.

  “Yeah, you haven’t touched your food.”

  “I’m sorry. I guess … well … I’m just so nervous.”

  “Haven’t you ever been on a date before?”

  “No.” Her voice was almost a whisper.

  “Well, there’s always a first time for everything, right?” Then, not waiting for an answer, he asked, “Can you jitterbug?”

  She shook her head. “No. I don’t know how to dance.”

  “Well, we are just going to have to fix that, won’t we? Come on, I’ll teach you.”

  May was self-conscious. She was sure everyone was looking at her as Leo pulled her out onto the dance floor. The band was playing the latest song by a famous country star who had begun playing rock and roll. It had a wild and exciting beat. Leo whirled May around until she felt she was floating. The music was loud and pulsating and they danced to the next song too. It was another fast number. But then the band played a slow tune. Leo tried to take May in his arms to dance with her, but she hardly reached his chest. Standing so close to him brought her back to reality. It was a terrible reminder of how short she was. She looked around and was sure that everyone was staring. Her face flushed.

  “Let’s sit down. People are looking at me, at how short I am,” May whispered.

  Leo nodded.

  They sat back down at the table for a few minutes and neither of them spoke. Leo was drumming his fingers on the table and not looking at her. Then he said, “Listen, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

  “No …” she stammered. “It’s not your fault.”

  “I just wanted to dance with the cutest girl in the room.”

  May blushed. Then she looked up at him and smiled.

  “Come on. Let’s get out of here and take a walk,” he said.

  As they walked, May told him about her life in Mudwater Creek. Leo told how he apprenticed under his uncle to le
arn his trade, and how he came to Nashville and found the job at the hotel.

  “I wanted to live in the city, so I took a chance and moved here,” he said.

  “That was bold of you.”

  “Yeah, maybe. But my sister lives in the suburbs of Nashville so if I got into real trouble I could always have gone to stay with her and her husband.”

  “Still, it was awfully courageous.”

  He laughed.

  “How did you find the job at the hotel?” she asked, trying hard to keep the conversation going. She didn’t want to bore him.

  “I saw a job listing in the paper. I went in and applied. The rest is history.”

  She nodded. “You like it here?”

  “Yeah, I’ve got steady work and a regular paycheck. And … well, now I have you to go out with sometimes. And … that’s really swell. I mean, of course … that’s if you will agree to see me again…”

  “Yes. Yes! Of course, I will see you again,” May beamed. “That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.”

  Leo leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

  “It feels like I’m dreaming. Like all of this is just a fantasy, like a fairy tale. Wonderful things like this don’t happen to girls like me,” she said. “The honest truth is, I never thought any boy would kiss me. Not ever.”

  He touched her hair. “Your hair is so soft.”

  She turned her head to the floor. She could feel how hot her face was and she knew that she was blushing so hard she was probably as red as a ripe cherry.

  “I am so embarrassed,” she stammered but he wasn’t listening. Instead, he turned her face toward him and kissed her again.

  “We better get home. We both need to take a nap before we go into work tonight,” he said.

  May nodded. But in truth, she would have forfeited the sleep just to spend a few more hours with Leo.

  When they arrived at May’s apartment, Leo kissed her softly and whispered, “I’ll see you later tonight. I’ll come into the switchboard room to say hello.”

  “I’ll really be looking forward to it,” she said. It was bold for her to say something like that and she felt suddenly reckless. “I had a wonderful time tonight,” she added.

  “Me too.”

  “Thank you, Leo,” she said. Even if he didn’t ever ask her out again, she would cherish the memories of this night for the rest of her life.

  May entered the apartment. She wanted more than anything to share her joy with Caroline. But then she remembered Caroline’s condition when she left and she was suddenly afraid. May ran into the bedroom to check on Caroline, her heart pounding. What if Caroline had done something foolish?

  “Caroline?” May whispered into the darkness. “I’m home.”

  “May, how was the date?”

  May took a deep breath and then let out a sigh of relief. At least Caroline was all right.

  Chapter Sixty-Two

  As the weeks passed, the relationship between May and Leo grew stronger. However, she still felt self-conscious when they went to public places. May was sure that everyone was looking at them and whispering, “How could he be going out with a girl like her?” It made her insecure. She found herself unable to hold Leo’s hand in public or dance with him and, of course, she could not kiss him when there were people around.

  It had been almost two weeks and Caroline had not heard a word from Tommy. There was no phone call or letter. Finally, out of necessity, Caroline returned to work. Of course, Tommy no longer worked at the diner. May noticed how much weight Caroline lost and she was worried. Even worse, May was distraught when she found large chunks of red hair in the drain. Caroline’s hair was falling out.

  Caroline tried to call Tommy’s apartment, but as she anticipated, his phone was disconnected.

  Well, of course he disconnected the phone. He’s on tour. But how can I reach him? How?

  The only idea that came to mind was to call the recording company and find out where he was touring and the name of the hotel where he was staying. It would be difficult to call the recording studio because she would have to talk to the man who had rejected her. She would have to give them her name because she knew that if she didn’t identify herself, the recording company would never divulge Tommy’s whereabouts.

  Too many girls called hunting for the musicians they saw in the music magazines. It was possible that the recording studio might not give her any information anyway. But she had only one choice and that was to try and speak to the man who had auditioned them. She would remind him that she was Tommy’s girlfriend and not some groupie.

  Caroline looked for the phone number and the man’s name in her wallet. She found it almost immediately.

  It’s a good thing I didn’t tear this up when I got the rejection. I certainly wanted to.

  Her hands trembled as she dialed the number. A woman answered. Caroline remembered her. She was the pretty young receptionist with the blond ponytail who was there the day they auditioned.

  “May I speak to Mr. Clark?” Caroline asked.

  “Who’s calling please?”

  “Caroline Hunt.”

  “One moment, please.”

  The girl sounds like a machine. She must get calls for Mr. Clark all day long, Caroline thought as she waited.

  “I’m sorry, Mr. Clark is not available. Can I take a message?”

  “Yes, of course, this is Caroline Hunt. I need to speak to Mr. Clark concerning my fiancé Tommy Terry. My number is 262-8950.”

  “I’ll give him the message.”

  “Do you have any idea when he might call back?”

  “I can’t say. But I will give him the message, ma’am.”

  “Thank you.”

  Two days passed but Mr. Clark did not return the call. Caroline called again. Once again, the secretary asked her to leave a message. Caroline began to leave her name and number, but then she burst into tears.

  “Please,” she begged. “Please help me. You’re a woman too. Tommy and I were going to be married. I haven’t heard from him since he went on tour. I just want to speak to him. I just have to know what is going on. I feel so lost and in the dark. Can you help me? Please help me. Please.”

  Judy, the young secretary, hesitated. She wasn’t supposed to give out the location of any of the musicians. But she remembered the redhead that came into the studio arm-in-arm with Tommy and she felt sorry for her. After all, Judy knew how it felt to be in love with a man who put his career first. She had been lovers with Bill Clark for two years, and she knew how much these men in the music industry could hurt a woman. Bill was married to a woman that he no longer lived with but he didn’t tell Judy until they were lovers for six months and she was already invested. Let’s face it; she was already in love. And before Bill, Judy dated a country singer who broke her heart. She could hear the pain in Caroline’s voice and she could relate.

  “Caroline,” Judy said. “I am going to give you a number where you can reach Tommy. But you have to promise me that you won’t tell anyone how you got the number. If you do, it could cost me my job.”

  “I won’t tell anyone. I swear it.”

  “Get a pencil and paper,” Judy said.

  “Got it.”

  “Write this down. When the operator answers just say you have the buzzword. She’ll ask for it. The buzzword is blueberry muffins.”

  “I just say blueberry muffins?”

  “Yes, you say that and she’ll put you through to Tommy’s room.”

  Chapter Sixty-Three

  Caroline could hear her heart pounding in her ear as the phone rang. As expected, an operator answered. “Georgian Terrace, Atlanta. How may I help you?”

  “Room 405,” Caroline said. Her hands were shaking so badly that she almost dropped the telephone receiver.

  “Room 405?” the operator said. “I’m sorry. That room is not taking calls.”

  “Blueberry muffins.” Caroline choked out the words. “Blueberry muffins,” she said even louder.
>
  “Thank you,” the operator said. “One moment, please. I’ll connect you.”

  The phone rang one time.

  “Hello.” It was Tommy’s voice. Caroline felt the tears well up in her eyes. She felt sick to her stomach. Suddenly, she wished she never called. She wanted to hang up, she was so afraid to speak, so afraid of what he might say.

  Why haven’t you called me?” she thought.

  But she said, “Tommy. It’s me, Caroline.”

  He didn’t say anything at first. There was dead silence on the other end. For a moment, she thought he hung up the phone, and she knew if he hung up she would never find the nerve to call back.

  “Caroline?” he said, his voice a little higher than normal and cracking.

  “How are you?” she asked.

  “Busy. They’ve got me running around like crazy.”

  “Well, that’s probably good, I guess,” she said, not knowing what else to say.

  “I guess.” Then she blurted out, “Tommy … I’ve got something I have to tell you.”

  He didn’t say anything, so she continued. “I’m pregnant.”

  There was another long silence. “Tommy? Are you there?”

  “Pregnant?” he said. There was a moment of silence and then in a tone she’d never heard from him before he asked, “Are you sure it’s mine?”

  “How could you ask me that? Of course it’s yours. You know I was a virgin when we did it the first time.”

  “Yeah, but how about after that?”

  “It’s yours, Tommy.”

  “Oh boy, oh boy. I can’t have a kid right now and I can’t have a wife either. I’m trying to build my career. How can I become a star in the industry with a kid and a wife hanging on me for God’s sake? It’s not good for musicians to have wives or girlfriends. If they have wives or girlfriends then the girl fans don’t buy their records.”

  “So what am I supposed to do?”

  “How should I know?”

  “I didn’t get in trouble alone. You had a part in it too.”

  “I’ll send you money. Get it taken care of.”