Take Me Back (Vegas Bad Boys #2)
Page 11
“Yeah, sure. You’ll just have to let me know when you want to see him, and I’m okay with that. I never wanted it to come to that either, you know? The full custody thing. I wish you’d been there, Clay. I guess that’s just another straw that broke the camel’s back. But I’m willing to work with you. He needs his father. I know that. And I know you’re not a bad person. You just make bad decisions, but I can’t have Jack and me directly affected by that anymore.” Her eyes turned glassy with tears, and I forced mine back as I looked away from them.
“I’d appreciate it. I miss him.” I missed her just as much, if not more. “You wouldn’t care if I found another woman? Wouldn’t you feel hurt by it? Because it makes me sick thinking of you with another man.”
“That’s because you still think I belong to you, and you don’t want anyone else to have your toy.”
“That’s not true. And you didn’t answer my question. How would that make you feel, Beth? Knowing I was close to someone else, kissing her, making love to her.”
She wasn’t smiling, and I could tell that the questions were making her uncomfortable.
“Clay, I think it’s time we go,” she said. She reached for Jack and picked him up. He had finished his bottle, so she put the empty one back in his diaper bag.
I decided to make light of the situation, knowing things were getting emotional, and I didn’t want Jack to see his mother cry or think that I’d made her.
“Oh sure, eat all of the spicy crackers and run.” I shook my head and gave her a teasing look. “I’m keeping the rest of the truffles for myself.”
She smiled and shook her head. “We’re going to be okay, you know? Even if we’re not together, it’s not the end of the world. We’re always going to be in each other’s lives.”
“Right.” It just felt like it.
Chapter 18
Beth
After spending most of the day with Clay and then going home to rush through my afternoon trying to get things done, I was exhausted both physically and emotionally.
While I knew Clay meant well and could tell he was really trying to step up for Jack, I wasn’t in the mood to revisit our entire past.
Clay had gone off to college, and while I had tried to go on a couple of dates, I just never could find anyone I was as enamored with, so by the time Fall came around my first year of college, I decided to give up on men and focus on my future.
I had worked hard and studied while he was away learning how to party hard and not much else. So his walk down memory lane looked a little different to me from the other side.
Jack had taken a long nap, and now that he was awake, we were going to join Della at my favorite restaurant.
When we arrived, I carried Jack in and found Della sitting at a table in the back. She was looking at the menu, which was a good thing. She could never make up her mind fast enough, and a head start meant we might actually be decided at the same time.
“Hey,” I said, getting her attention. “Are these seats taken?”
“No, I’m saving them for my best friend and the cutest little boy on earth.”
“Ah, well, here we are. Did you already figure out what you want?”
“No. I like it all. I think I’ll just have one of everything.”
“That’s one way to do it.” I giggled as I sat Jack in his booster the hostess brought over. “Thank you,” I told her.
“I would ask you how your day went, but I already know it went better than mine.” Della had seemed a little out of sorts when she called to invite us, so I hadn’t had a chance to tell her about what happened with Clay or that I’d spent half the day with him.
“I’m not sure about that. But you go first, and we’ll compare over dessert.”
The waitress showed up about that time and left a loaf of bread and butter and took our drink orders. When she was done and gone, Della sagged in her seat. “I screwed up today.”
“At work?”
“Yeah, and my dad is going to be super pissed. I failed to secure the investment property he’s been eyeing for two years now. I don’t know what I’m going to tell him.”
“Oh, no. I know that’s rough. Did someone else buy it?”
“No, but it means we’ll have to renegotiate again and hope they’ll take it. But my father was already giving them more than he wanted, and he’s already in a bad mood after losing one of our other buyers.”
“I’m sure it won’t be as bad as you think when it’s all over. Your father knows how hard you work and that you’ve been putting everything into your work.”
“He thinks I’m distracted.”
“With Jack? Is watching him a problem?” I didn’t want her keeping Jack to come in the way of her getting her work done. “Just tell me, and I’ll find someone else.”
“Nonsense. I work from home, he sleeps half the day, and it’s perfect what we have set up. It’s not that. He thinks I’m dating, which I’m not, because the only men I see are the ones I work with.”
“You need to get out more,” I said as the waitress brought our drinks.
“Me? Don’t you mean we?” Della gave me a hard look and told the waitress she needed a few more minutes.
When the woman walked away, I took a sip of my soda. “I’m not sure it’s a good time for that. Especially since Clay thinks I’m getting the divorce so I can play the field. He was so upset. It’s just too soon still.”
“You saw him today?”
“Yeah,” I said, breaking off a chunk of bread and smearing it with butter. “More like most of the day. He took Jack and me to the amphitheater. He wanted to see how Jack reacted to the sounds in an open area outdoors, and he’s got this idea that he might be able to get Jack to distinguish sounds through vibrations by using music as therapy. He’s done this whole research apparently.”
“Well, that’s good, isn’t it? Sounds like he’s really trying, Beth.”
She didn’t know the half of it. “Oh, he’s trying all right. Trying to get me back, and it’s not going to work. I had to shoot him down like six times over the course of him talking about our past. It was so uncomfortable. He sees how things were and romanticizes them. And while I get that at the moment it was all sweet, but I remember a lot of heartache and pain that he has already forgotten, and it just shows that he’s blind to most of the stuff he’s put me through.”
“Is he blind to it, or does he just want to remember the good? It’s not a terrible thing. Most people want to forget a bad past.”
“Yeah, well, as soon as I suggested that we see other people, I could feel the anger coming from him. It’s not healthy. He even asked me how I’d feel if he moved on to another woman. He doesn’t even get the fact that I’m the one pushing him away. Why do I care what he does when he moves on? I didn’t want to hurt him and tell him the whole point is that I don’t care.”
Della pulled her lips in tight as if there was something she was refraining from saying.
“What?” I asked her. “I can see you have something on your mind.”
“What would you think and feel if you looked across this room and spotted Clay at the table with another woman? How would that hit you?” Her look was so smug that I immediately looked around to make sure he wasn’t sitting with someone else across the room. Della laughed. “Thought so.”
“I wouldn’t care.” I waved my hand at her like it was nothing. Just another woman trying to get in my husband’s pants. Nothing new. Nothing I wasn’t used to from all of the years being with a musician.
“Yeah, right. You might not show it, but you’d care. You wouldn’t want Clay to go away and be with someone else. You just want him to go away. Have you really considered what it would be like to see him move on to another woman? Possibly a woman who would want to raise Jack as a stepmother?”
The word stepmother hit me in the gut. “Clay’s not going to find anyone like that. He’s going to end up with some skank from a bar who probably only wants a one-night stand when she finds out how
broke he is.”
“Come on. You and I both know that his mommy is going to take care of him, and don’t be so sure he won’t end up with someone who could be a great stepmom. He had you, remember? Clay is the kind of guy who might want to fool around and flirt with a bimbo type, but when it comes to who he invests time with, I think he’ll do better than you think.”
“It doesn’t mean I have to let some stranger take over my responsibilities. I won’t have that happen.” I didn’t like her bringing that to my attention.
“Hey, I’m not trying to upset you, but you should be honest with yourself. You would hate him finding someone else. I know you would. Hell, I can’t tell you how many times you’ve called me because some girl was looking at him in the clubs.”
“We were married then.”
“Remember that one chick, the one who followed him for a week? You wanted to slap her silly, and that was when you were talking about leaving him.”
“It’s different. I’m different now. For one, I can’t just go around slapping every little groupie who decides to be infatuated with him over a love song. I have Jack to worry about, and one of us had to put him first. It’s me. Clay never could. And honestly, I did still have feelings when he was talking about our past. I still remember all of it. Every date, every time we had a milestone moment, like losing our virginity and getting drunk for the first time together. We once made love in the rain, and I remember the first time he cooked me breakfast after college. Those were all great times, but then he’d screw up, and it would all fall apart, and it was a lot of pain and grief trying to put it all back together again. I’ve done it too many times.”
The waitress returned. “Have you made up your minds yet? Perhaps I could make a few suggestions?”
“No, it’s good,” said Della. “I’ll have the sirloin salad.”
“I’ll have the same,” I said to make it easy. I didn’t really have much of an appetite after thinking about Clay and other women. “And let’s get the mashed potatoes for my son.”
“Oh,” said Della as if she just remembered something. “Do you have sweet potatoes?”
“Baked and fried. Yes, ma’am.”
“Bring one of those too, please.”
The waitress left. “You’re going to eat a sweet potato?”
“Not me, but Jack. I gave him some of mine the other day and the little guy nearly ate the whole thing. He loved it. I wanted to surprise you.”
“He’s getting so big,” I said. “Pretty soon, the things that happen between me and Clay will start to affect our son. And I don’t want to give Clay a chance now, only to hurt Jack later when it all falls apart again.”
“I understand that,” she said. “But think of everything else you’d be giving him in that time. And you don’t know that it would fall apart again. So if that’s the only reason you’re not giving him a chance, then I’m sorry, but it’s not a good enough excuse. Isn’t it better for Jack to have his father as long as he can?”
“I’m already sick of the emotional roller coaster that is Clay, so can we just change the subject? All I want now is for him to sign those papers and set me free.”
“If you still love him, though, you never will be. You’ll always be tethered to him, if not by Jack then your heart. Just make damned sure before you give up something that’s meant to be.”
I felt a tug in my heart and wondered if it could ever be mended enough to trust Clay again.
When our food came nearly twenty minutes later, it was worth the wait, and I did my best to push aside all of the hurt feelings so I could focus on the moment with my son.
Della put a big pat of butter in the potato and fed Jack a bite. “Watch,” she said, giggling. She got another bite ready and waved the spoon in front of his face. Jack followed it with his mouth open, anticipating the next taste.
“You give that to him,” I said with a laugh. “Don’t tease my baby.”
“I told you he loves it. I bet he doesn’t even eat that other potato.” She pointed to the baked potato I’d mashed up for him.
“Let’s do a taste test.” I readied a bite of the regular potato and fed it to Jack. He opened and closed his hand as if reaching for more of what Della had.
“Told you,” she said with a grin. “That’s my boy.”
I knew she didn’t mean anything by it, but it kind of stung that she knew more about my son’s eating habits than I did. I laughed it off, but I kept thinking of Clay bringing another woman into my son’s life. It hurt more than I could bear, but it wasn’t enough to change anything. The sooner my divorce was final, the sooner I could move on too.
Chapter 19
Clay
Just when I thought I was the kind of guy who didn’t let rejection get to him, I found myself spiraling. Not only had I been turned down from a few gigs, but apparently, there was another guy in town trying to get in on the game, and I now had competition for the spotlights that used to be my livelihood.
Knowing my day would only get worse if I kept it up, I decided to throw in the towel and head back to the hotel to drown my sorrows with a drink and maybe a swim.
On the way, I couldn’t help but think about how things had gone with Beth and me the day before. I had really thought I was making progress with her, proving myself to her, but instead, she was more and more determined to push me away. And if it wasn’t another man, then that meant she really hated me. She would rather be alone than with me.
I turned on some music and it reminded me of my son. Seeing him would make me feel better, so I slowed the car and took that exit, hoping to catch Beth. Judging by the time, she should have been on her way out from her office to pick him up. And if I caught her in time, then maybe I could suggest we go somewhere to eat so I could see him for a while. I needed my family.
When I got to the resource center, I saw her car out in the parking lot and decided to go in and ask her instead of waiting. If she turned me down too, I could at least grab a bite on my way home.
She had to be done with her sessions. It was nearly four thirty, and her last session was usually over by four.
I passed a boy on my way who had a dollar in his hand and was headed straight for the vending machines. With any luck, she wasn’t stuck waiting on his parents to get him.
When I got down the hall far enough to see into the windows that lined part of the front wall of her office, I found a man standing with Beth, who was practically cornered between him and her desk.
It took every ounce of restraint I had in me not to barge in, but what stopped me was Beth shaking her head. The door was open, and I walked in, stepping quietly.
“Come on, Beth,” he said. He noticed me, and my presence caused him to do a double-take.
I was sick just hearing her name on his lips.
Beth’s eyes widened. “Clay?”
“Oh, you must be the ex,” said the man.
“No, I’m her husband. What is this, Beth?”
“Not what it looks like.” She turned her attention to the man, who seemed to be amused by it all. “Luke, you should go. I’ll see Taylor tomorrow.”
“And we can finish this conversation?” He put his hand in his pockets like he hadn’t a care in the world.
“You’re really pushing it, Luke,” she said.
“Yeah, Luke. You should quit while you’re ahead.” Or while he still had one.
“I can wait. Until next time, Beth.” He gave me a glance and then winked at her as he turned and walked away. The only thing keeping him from getting his skull dragged was the fact that his boy had returned to sit in the hallway behind me.
Beth waved goodbye to his son and then began to gather her things. “What are you doing here?”
I stepped closer and cornered her like Luke had. “No, Beth, what are you doing here? Your sessions ended over thirty minutes ago. You’ve been up here flirting with that guy?”
“No, it’s not like that. I had a late start, and for your information, it’s not your
business who I talk to anymore.”
“You want that guy? Over me?” I searched her eyes as she grew angry.
“You can’t just come in here like this and accuse me. I said it’s not what you think.”
“Are you dating him?”
“No!” she said.
“Sleeping with him?”
“No,” she said with angry tears. “But if I wanted to, it’s not your place to tell me no.”
“I’m still your husband, Beth.”
“What are you even doing here?”
“Did I ruin your plans?”
“Stop it, Clay!” She raked her hand through her hair. “What do you want?”
“To see my son. I thought we’d go out.”
“I’m not going out. I’m too tired.”
“Then let me cook for you. I’ll make this up to you.” I mostly wanted to get to the bottom of why that man was so forward with her.
“Fine. Go ahead. But I’m not talking about this with you. It’s not your business.”
That was where she was so wrong. “Anytime you have another man around my son, it’s going to be my business, Beth.” I was in her face and close enough to kiss her, but I was too upset, and she would have probably slapped me silly. “I’ll go to the market and get us something.”
“Get a sweet potato for Jack,” she said, grabbing her handbag. “I’ll see you at the house.”
“I’ll use my key and let myself in if you haven’t changed the locks.”
“As long as your things are there, I won’t do that to you.”
“No, just after the papers are signed, right?”
“Are we going to fight all night? Maybe you shouldn’t come.”
“No, I’ll be there. It’s fine. I just want to see Jack. It’s kind of hard to look at you right now anyway.” I turned and walked away to get a head start. I was glad she had agreed to let me come over, but I could feel the tension between us.
I went to the market and grabbed a couple of steaks and the sweet potato for Jack. Then I went to the house and let myself in. It was hard not to look for signs of another man being around, and while I glanced at a few suspicious things, I didn’t want to get myself more worked up over it.