The Way Forward

by Eliana West

  “Parents aren’t always who we want them to be.”

  “You sound like you speak from experience.”

  “It’s silly to think they’re ever going to change; if they haven’t done it by now I doubt they ever will.”

  Dax nodded. “I’m beginning to understand that with my mother, I’m trying to be optimistic but…”

  Callie looked at him with understanding in her eyes. “Every time she does something that shows she’s not going to change, you lose a little hope.”

  “Callie, I don’t want you to feel that way about me. I have changed and if you can give me a chance I’d like to prove it to you.”

  She bowed her head for a moment and then looked up at him. “I…I like you Dax, and I have to be honest that scares me sometimes. It isn’t easy to let go of something that you’ve held onto for a long time and not liking you is something I’ve been doing for a long time.”

  “I understand.”

  “I’m not saying no Dax.” She reached over and touched his hand. “I’m just saying…I want to let go but I’m just not sure how.”

  Dax gently placed his other hand on top of hers. “That’s more than I deserve, thank you.”

  “Just give me some time,” Callie requested.

  “Callie Colton, you are a woman worth waiting for.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  For the first time since Dax had returned, Callie thought life was settling down just a bit. It wasn’t as quiet as it was before, not with the sounds of construction and Jacob’s motorcycle echoing through the town square, but her days had settled into a pleasant routine, and she was delighted by the progress on her bookstore.

  Callie looked up from her desk as the tall, lanky figure of Mae’s father caught her eye.

  “How’s my favorite niece?” Joseph asked, opening his arms wide as he walked into the library.

  Callie came around the checkout desk and walked into his warm embrace. Her eyes misted for just a moment. His hugs reminded her so much of her grandfather. She pulled back and asked, “What brings you to the library today?”

  “You.” Joseph searched her face. “Ella and I are worried about you. It’s been too long since you’ve joined us at our Sunday table.”

  “Sorry, I’ve been…distracted lately.”

  “How are things going with the bookstore?”

  “We’re finally making good progress. We’ve gotten all of the inspections completed and Jacob is working on the finishing touches.”

  “And how are you doing having Dax Ellis back in town?”

  Callie sighed. “I don’t know, some days are better than others.”

  “Come on, sweetheart, let’s sit down and talk for a bit.” Joseph led her over to the large oak table in the center of the room. He settled into one of the chairs and crossed his arms on the table. “I know it’s been unsettling having that boy move back here.”

  “We’ve talked a few times and I appreciate that he’s trying. I admire him for turning his life around, but his mother is still so terrible. Dax was always such a mama’s boy when we were young, and now he’s…defending me, taking my side against her, and it makes me nervous. This isn’t going to end well.”

  She’d never thought to ask her uncle before but now was the time. “Do you know why his mother hates our family so much?”

  Joseph sat back and pulled his hands into his lap. “There’s a lot of history between the two sides of the Colton families. Some things are better left alone.”

  “I don’t understand. Mom won’t even talk about her life here.”

  Joseph leaned forward and covered her hand with his. “Your mother always had her sights set on bigger and better things than spending her life in the Mississippi Delta. She followed her dreams to Seattle and she’s never looked back.”

  “You miss her don’t you.”

  “Your mom and I were as close as you and Mae were growing up. Your mom is the one who introduced me to Ella.”

  Callie smiled. “I didn’t know that.”

  “We were so close growing up, and I was sad to see her go, but we all have to make our own choices in life and decide what will make us happy.”

  “She’s so disappointed that I decided to make Colton my home.”

  “I always knew I would come back to Colton when I finished college, and she couldn’t get out fast enough.” Joseph’s face fell. “She left in a hurry and hurt a lot of people when she didn’t say goodbye. It hurt me that, as close as we were, she didn’t confide in me… I hoped she would make different choices.” He squeezed Callie’s hand. “But she gave us you, and no one could ask for a greater gift. Don’t pay any mind to Dorothy Ellis—her bark is worse than her bite. That boy over there—” Joseph pointed across the square “—he’s grown into a fine young man and he’s not going to put up with his mama’s foolishness.”

  He got up and came around the table to pull Callie into a hug. “I’m sorry your parents haven’t done right by you. All the money in the world doesn’t take the place of having loving parents. I know it’s not the same, but Ella and I will always be here for you.”

  “I wish they were still here.”

  “We all do, honey. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of them. They would be so proud of you, just like Ella and I are.”

  “Will you be honest with me?”

  “About what sweetheart?”

  “Do you think they would be upset if I were friends with Dax or maybe…went out on a date with him? I just wish they were here to tell me what I should do.”

  Joseph threw his head back and laughed. “Oh, sweetheart, even if they were here, they wouldn’t do that. Being a good parent or grandparent means giving your children the tools to figure things out for themselves even if it means making some mistakes along the way.”

  “That’s not what I wanted you to say, you know,” she grumbled.

  Joseph kissed the top of her head. “I know, baby girl.”

  He gave her one more pat on the back and slipped out of the door as a few more patrons came in, robbing Callie of the chance to dwell on their conversation.

  Dark clouds edged the evening sky when the last person selected their book and Callie could close the library and start her walk home. She’d looked at a few vintage bicycles online but hadn’t found anything that she wanted to buy. It wasn’t the bike; it was the fact that her grandfather found the old cruiser and restored it for her. Nothing could replace the love that came with that gift. She could use the sleek silver sports car her parents surprised her with after graduation, but it only made her look like more of an outsider in this small town.

  Gravel crunched under her flats, kicking up small puffs of dust. Walking didn’t take that much longer than riding anyway. She glanced up at the sky at the first low rumble of thunder, cursing herself for not paying attention to the rapidly approaching dark clouds before she set out. A slight breeze ruffled her hair and her nose twitched as the air became heavy with moisture. The clouds above cast a dark shadow, bringing an eerie, unnatural twilight. Just as she reached the halfway point, another low rumble of thunder brought the first splatter of raindrops.

  Within minutes her favorite dress was drenched and clinging to her legs. She clutched her tote bag to her chest, trying to protect the books and her laptop from the rain. With her head down, she put all of her focus on getting home as quickly as possible. With each footstep the raindrops got bigger. She was so focused on trying to avoid the worst of the rapidly forming puddles, she didn’t notice the truck pulling up alongside her.

  “Callie, stop. Let me give you a ride.”

  Dax pulled ahead of her, the red brake lights came on and the truck jerked to a stop and Dax came bounding out. “It’s coming down hard,” he said.

  She struggled with her bag and nearly slipped on the wet and muddy gravel.

  Dax grabbed her around the waist before she fell, hands warm through the damp fabric. “Callie, you’re getting soaked through. Come on let’s get y
ou into the truck.”

  “Thank you,” she shivered. “I thought I could beat the storm.”

  “This is only going to get worse. Let’s get you home before lightning strikes.”

  She let him help her into his truck, and then she buckled her seat belt. Which would be more dangerous: the lightning or Dax? Maybe they were both the same thing. A bright flash accompanied another rumble of thunder.

  He climbed in, smelling like sandalwood and musk. She closed her eyes and held her breath. A thousand butterflies had taken up residence in her stomach. She tried to stop the tremors that ran through her body. Was it from being out in the rain or so close to Dax? When she opened her eyes, she looked down and realized the rain had made her dress transparent. The delicate floral lace pattern of her bra was clearly outlined underneath the pale pink floral dress. She blushed to the roots of her hair and hunched her shoulders, trying to hide herself while Dax buckled in next to her.

  He reached for the knob on the radio. His arm brushed against her again, making her shiver. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the corded muscles on his arms or his long fingers as he fiddled with the dial. “Sorry about the music,” he said, turning down the radio.

  “It’s okay. I…I like Lucas Monroe.”

  Dax raised an eyebrow.

  “What, brown girls can’t like country music?” she said. She lifted her chin. “I also like Thomas Rhett and I love Dolly Parton. Miss Dolly tells us the stories that we might not want, but we need to hear,” she finished with a solemn nod.

  “I didn’t… That’s not…” He sighed and rested his arms on the steering wheel. “I served with Lucas. I’m glad you like his music.”

  He started down the road; the windshield wipers swished back and forth, fighting a losing battle against the deluge. Southern storms were known for being brief but fierce; a thirty-minute storm in Colton could do as much damage as a day of rain back home in Seattle. Callie didn’t miss the days and even weeks of constant rain, but Seattle storms were rarely accompanied by thunder and lightning. Another bolt of lightning split the sky in two. She wrapped her arms around herself.

  Callie looked down at the damp upholstery on the bench seat. “I’m sorry, I’m getting everything wet.”

  “Small price to pay to rescue a damsel in distress.”

  “Thanks again for not telling anyone about the new fire truck and letting me watch from your place.”

  Within minutes Dax pulled into her driveway. He turned off the engine and the rain created a dull roar around them. He turned toward her, his gaze locked with hers. “I told you, you can trust me,” he said in a calm, quiet voice. “As a matter of fact, I was thinking we should talk about our plans so that we don’t step on each other’s toes again.”

  “Do you have another project for the town in mind?”

  “I want to do everything I can, not just to make up for how terrible I was as a boy. This is my home and I can do my bit to be a part of the community and help Colton grow. I’d like to look at some ways to help more small businesses open up in town. I’d like to know what kinds of goods and services you think Colton could use.”

  “We could talk about that,” she agreed.

  The cab of the truck suddenly became too small. She needed to get away so she could breathe again.

  “I should go,” she said, jerking the door handle open.

  “I’ll walk you up.” Dax jumped out of the truck and escorted her to her front door.

  They faced each other on her porch. She looked into his brown eyes and her heart hammered at the intensity in his expression. For a minute the rain disappeared and it was just the two of them. His face was suddenly so close to hers, she could see the tiny drops of water that clung to his eyelashes and his lips. Without thinking, Callie opened the door, reached for Dax, pulling him inside. Another flash of lightning illuminated the sky, bringing another deluge. His wet T-shirt hugged his muscular chest, and little raindrops slid down his jaw.

  “Just a minute.” She ran to the bathroom and came back with a large towel, shoving it at him.

  Dax took it from her but instead of using it on himself he reached over and began to wipe her face. Callie closed her eyes. She felt his breath on her cheek and then his lips brush against her damp skin at the corner of her mouth. She wasn’t sure if he shifted or if she was the one who gave that fraction of an inch that brought them together. The only thing she did know was that she had never been kissed like that before. Sloppy kisses from timid boys in high school and the college boys who wanted to show off their skills were all forgotten when his lips met hers.

  She gasped from the wonder of it, and his tongue slipped inside. He reached up, caressing the back of her neck. Her knees would have given out if he hadn’t pulled her closer, and suddenly she found herself pressing against him, wanting more.

  She cupped his cheek, reveling in the feel of his whiskers against her fingertips. He moaned, and the knowledge that she had the power to make him do that went straight to her head. She placed her hands on his chest and could feel his heart beating in time with hers. He started to pull away, but she grasped his shirt and held on. He covered her hands with his and pried them away but continued to hold them, his gaze searching her face.

  “I know I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t help myself. I’m—”

  Callie closed her eyes. “Don’t say you’re sorry. Just don’t.”

  He ran his thumb along her cheekbone wiping away a tear or a raindrop; she wasn’t sure. He pressed his forehead against hers.

  “I should…I need to go.”

  Callie swallowed and nodded. The right thing would be for him to leave. There was a time when the safe thing for her was to run away from the boy, but that time had passed and she wanted to stand with the man holding her so gently now.

  “I’m not afraid,” she whispered to herself as much as Dax.

  A moment later she heard the truck start up; she opened her eyes and watched the taillights disappear. Callie reached up, touching the place where Dax had kissed her; in spite of being soaked through she felt warmth wash over her. Slowly, she closed the door then moved through the house, turning on a few lights and making sure her laptop and her phone were plugged in just in case the power went out, as it often did when the rain hit hard.

  She lit a few candles and their warm vanilla fragrance filled the air. After a hot shower she wrapped herself in her favorite kimono with a cherry blossom pattern on a yellow background. She’d bought it on a trip to San Francisco. She ran the tie through her fingers. Her father had offered to take her with him when she was in high school. She’d been so excited thinking that she would actually get to spend time with him, but when they landed and she saw two black Escalades waiting at the bottom of the stairway, she knew.

  That was the moment she gave up on the little hope she had left in her parents’ ability to change and she stopped asking them to participate in any aspect of her life after that day. There was no point in wanting them to come to her school assemblies or parent-teacher conferences. She wasn’t going to get affirmation and love; she could rely only on herself.

  That trip also became a turning point. After the tour guide took her on a tour of Chinatown, she brought Callie to the City Lights bookstore, where she fell in love. She bought her first Moleskine journal and a Sandra Brown book, and she was hooked. She wrote a short story that night about a boy who threw rocks at little girls.

  Her phone pinged with a text message.

  “I’m just checking to make sure you’re okay.”

  “I’m fine, thank you for giving me a ride home.”

  Calle watched the three dots in the bubble appear, disappear and then appear again.

  “I lied. I’m not checking to make sure you’re okay, I’m checking to make sure you don’t regret kissing me.”

  Callie leaned back against the headboard. Did she regret kissing Dax?

  “No I don’t regret kissing you.”

  The bubbles did their dance again.
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  “Would you consider letting me do it again?”

  A smile played on her lips. She must have worried him while she took her time trying to craft a response.

  “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have asked that.”

  “It’s okay I was just thinking.”

  “Do you want to share?”

  A loud crash of thunder was followed by a flash of lightning and the power went out. Callie drew the covers up to her chin.

  “Did your power just go out?” he texted.

  “Yes.”

  “Ours too. Are you okay, do you need anything?”

  “Nope I’m good.”

  “Are you going to tell me what you were thinking about?”

  “I was thinking that in a million years I never thought I would be lying in bed in the dark texting Dax Ellis during a thunderstorm.”

  “That’s not fair and that’s not what you were thinking.”

  “Why isn’t it fair?”

  “Because now I’m picturing you in bed.”

  Callie chuckled. “Don’t be cheeky.”

  Dax send a sad face emoji. “Sorry,” followed by, “Do you want to picture where I am?”

  “I’m guessing your on Uncle Robert’s front porch watching the storm.”

  “You’re good at this. I missed rain storms like this when I was away. Are you going to tell me what you were really thinking about before?”

  Callie sighed. “I was thinking about how much has changed since you’ve been here, about how I’ve changed and I was trying to decide how I feel about it…about you.”

  “I wonder the same thing about you. I think about what projects we can work on together for the town and how much I look forward to sharing my ideas with you.”

  “We need to get the clinic up and running again, any chance you know of a good doctor who would be willing to move to a small town?”

  “No but together I know we can find someone.”

  “It’s getting late, we can talk about it some more tomorrow.”

  “Good night, Callie.”

  “Good night, Dax.”