Brutal: A Driven World Novel (The Driven World)

by S. Valentine

  When we’re in the car her hand is already sliding up my leg and groping me. Then she leans over, kissing my neck. I tell her to stop and put her seatbelt on, but she continues touching and nibbling. Anger soars through me and I slam the brakes on, rip up the handbrake and glare at her.

  “Put your seatbelt on!” I command.

  She shoots backwards in her seat, shocked at my outburst. I worry she’ll leave, but then she hastily pulls the seatbelt across her body. “No need to be so aggressive.”

  I fill my lungs with air, trying to calm my erratic breathing. “I’m sorry,” my tone is low. When my hands are no longer shaking I continue to drive.

  “Were you in a car accident, or something?” she asks, yanking down the mirror and fiddling with her hair.

  “No.” I’m always on my guard because of my line of work. Accidents can happen at any time. Whoever is with me must be safe. “It’s reckless not to wear your belt,” I tell her.

  She sighs heavily. “Well, you sure killed the moment.”

  “Want me to take you home?”

  She shakes her head and focuses on the road ahead. I tap the steering wheel, wishing she wasn’t in a mood. Glancing at her dress which has ridden up, I trail one hand up her tanned thigh until I’m between her legs. I stroke her gently, teasingly, and she moans, slouching in the seat. I’m a skilled driver, but I slow the speed, and continue to circle my fingertips around the soft material of her underwear. Her entire body shudders in what I think is pleasure. I move the material aside and feel her warmness. She throws her head back, her eyes squeezing shut as I move faster.

  “Is…this…not…being…reckless?” She groans.

  “No,” I respond in a serious tone. “I’m a good driver. But if you’re worried…” I move my hand and swerve the car around. “We can park somewhere quiet.” Finding a dark alleyway, I park the car and kill the engine.

  As soon as my seatbelt is off she’s on my lap and kissing me ferociously. I return her enthusiasm and kiss her hard, sucking on her tongue, nibbling her lips, biting down her neck. Her moans match my groans and she wriggles out of her underwear. I’m sexually frustrated, desperate for this, and I unzip my trousers, panting, needing to relieve myself of life’s recent stresses.

  “Elias…” she murmurs, her voice husky. Her tongue swirls around mine. I break eye contact, not wanting to be that close, that emotionally deep with her.

  When she lowers onto me I curse and bite my bottom lip at the intensity. Fuck. It feels amazing. She slowly moves up and down, her hands on my shoulders for support. I can’t take this. I need control. I need to fuck this woman hard and fast, like the savage I am in the bedroom.

  “Stop,” I order, and she does. “Get out the car.”

  “What?” She’s flabbergasted.

  “Get on the back seat…anything.”

  She scrambles onto the back seat and I’m thankful my car is spacious. I get out the car and open the back door to join her. She gets on her knees and bends forward when I instruct her to. Checking we have the all clear, I grab her hips and thrust into her deeply. She howls loudly and I hammer into her fast, in and out, over and over. Leaning closer, I lick up her neck teasingly before biting her ear.

  “Do you like that?” I ask, pushing my hips forward hard.

  “Yes,” she cries out.

  “Tell me how much you like it. Tell me what you want me to do to you. In detail.” I grab a fistful of her hair and pull her head to mine. “Tell me.”

  She proceeds to tell me in explicit details what she wants from me. I knew this woman wasn’t shy. When she orgasms, crying out and shuddering, I allow myself to climax. Afterwards I drive her home completely devoid of any emotion. I’m empty. This is the part I hate. When I’m lying in bed an hour later, alone, I’m physically aching from the guilt. I don’t deserve to feel good. Ever.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  AMARA

  Oh no! My hand flies to my throat and I stare, bewildered, frightened to step forward. No. Please. Please. No. I swallow hard and squeeze my eyes shut, praying to the Lord above, asking him to not let it be. Grey ominous clouds fill the sky, the raindrops coming down faster and faster.

  “Roger,” I call him again, louder this time. “Roger!”

  He’s a ball of fur lying near the bushes, the bowl I left out last night empty. If he’s dead…Oh. I can’t even think about it. If he’s dead…I grimace. If he’s dead it’s Thomas’s fault! I begged him to let Roger stay in the back garden, that we could get a wooden house and make it warm. He said he didn’t want the mess, hairs everywhere and a dog smell clogging up the air.

  My legs are heavy, rooted to the spot, and I doubt I can look, if ever. Maybe I should turn away and call Elias. He can check for me.

  “Roger,” I shout again, this time tears rolling down my cheeks. “Roger!” I shakily force myself toward him and I reach out. My hand is shaking. I’m unaware of the car pulling up beside the house. My palm lands on the dog’s wet, curly fur and I shake him softly at first. Nothing. No movement. I shove harder and again, no reaction.

  “No!” I wail, crumbling into heart-wrenching sobs. I really got attached to him.

  “Miss. Jain?”

  I jerk backwards and see Elias has come to a halt on the path. Thomas isn’t with him so I guess he’s doing his little errands. Concern lines mar his forehead and he asks what’s wrong. I race toward him and hold him tight, burying my tear soaked face into his blazer.

  “He’s dead. Roger’s dead.”

  “What?” He holds me tighter and strokes my back. “I’m sorry.”

  “I…I…” Words pour out but they don’t make sense. “I wanted to keep him, but Thomas wouldn’t let me.”

  Elias releases me and steps toward the dog. I link my hands together, the little girl in me hoping Elias will have some magic touch and Roger will spring to life. He feels the dog’s neck, checking for his pulse. I stand and wait, silent.

  “Go inside, put the kettle on, and I’ll call the RSPCA.”

  I do as I’m told and break down harder when I’m alone in the kitchen. It’s not fair. I wanted to rescue Roger. Maybe my fate will be the same. Maybe it’s too late for me too. Infuriated with Thomas I bolt upstairs and start to pack my belongings. I’ve been worrying about ending the relationship all day, but this incident is the final straw. I can’t do it. I can’t live an empty, unfulfilled life. We both deserve better.

  When I’ve finished I drop to the floor until I can’t possibly cry any more. Two suitcases are on the bed. All I have are clothes, toiletries, and books, nothing else to show for my life. Being imprisoned and not having much of a say in anything will do that to a person.

  Grabbing my mobile I call Lori. I’m hoping she’ll let me stay with her. If not I have some savings to last me a few months at least. I’ll just ask if she has extra hours I can bake to earn more. With each ring, the more my nerves grow. When she eventually answers I explain everything.

  “Amara,” she yells. “Of course you can stay with me! I’d love the company.”

  “I’ll help with the rent.”

  “Don’t be daft.” She laughs. “You’re my friend and I know you’d help me if the tables were turned.”

  She’s right, I would. “I’ll probably see you in a few hours then.”

  “You can do this,” she says trying to inject some courage into me. “He’s a cheating asshole, he doesn’t value you, and you deserve better.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I’ll see you soon. You sure you don’t want me to come over? What if he gets violent?”

  I remember the gun in his safe and my breath holds tight inside me. Should I be worried? It’s not like I can call the Police should I feel in danger. Elias. I’ll ask him to stick around. “I’ll be fine.” I don’t want to have to tell Lori my life story too.

  I put my mobile away and stare absentmindedly at the wall. I get to thinking about the past. For some people a song, film, person, quote can take them back to
a happier place. They miss the person they once was, and perhaps they were carefree, in love, happy. It isn’t the case for me. I don’t yearn to be young again, to relive my old life. My old life was depressing and nothing in particular sparks a happy memory. It saddens me, but at least I have the future. I hope I have the future. Should my plan go wrong I’ll be that girl again, living that life, desperate to escape, or worse, I’ll be killed.

  Some people don’t have the future, they don’t get that second chance, and I physically ache for them. What about all the people that passed and didn’t get to their happy place, ever? My heart is heavy in my chest and I have a strong urge to break down in tears for people I’ve witnessed this happen to, and for those I haven’t and don’t know.

  “Miss. Jain.” Elias startles me. “They’ve taken the dog. Are you okay?”

  I nod meekly and stand. “Why are you here?”

  “Mr. Thomas needed more money. Said his wallet is in his bedside draw.”

  “Go ahead.” I gesture for him to enter the bedroom.

  He does so and scurries through Thomas’s draw retrieving his black wallet.

  “Elias,” I whisper. “Do you think after you’ve brought Thomas home, you could maybe park down the road, stick around for an hour or so?”

  His back straightens and he spots the suitcases. “What are you doing?” he asks slowly and cautiously.

  “I’m leaving him.”

  “Why?”

  I wrap my arms around myself, hating how vulnerable I am right now. “I don’t love him.”

  His chest rises and falls. “Is that the only reason?” He seems worried.

  Something clicks in my mind. He thinks that he may have something to do with me leaving Thomas. And he’s worried, like he’d never want that. I’m confused and hurt, but this has nothing to do with Elias.

  “Yes, that’s the only reason,” I snap. “Now can you leave so I can finish packing?”

  He nods and leaves.

  Anger boils inside me again mixed with sadness. I can’t focus on anything right now except for ending it with Thomas.

  As soon as he’s home I try to calmly tell him I can’t be with him anymore, that I know he’s cheated on me. This is a lie, but I have my suspicions.

  “You can date whoever you want now. We can still be friends. We’re just not compatible.”

  His face reddens in rage. “I’ve done everything for you. Saved you from living in a shithole. Bought you clothes. Saved you.”

  “I appreciate all that.” I try to stay strong. “I need to go. We’re just prolonging the inevitable.”

  “You ungrateful bitch.”

  “Can I have the keys to the safe, please? I need the gun.”

  He laughs mirthlessly. “I disposed of it that same day.”

  I’m frozen in place. No. “I need it! You know that!” I shout, sinking my hands into my hair.

  He shakes his head in disgust. “Go and do whatever you want, Amara. Go and see how hard it is out there. You’ll be back.”

  I grab my suitcases and tell him goodbye. The break-up went better than expected. He thinks I’ll be back, but he’s wrong. I’ve no doubt my life will be hard now, and I’m in more danger not having Thomas around, or Elias.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  ELIAS

  Maverick Haynes sure knows how to throw a party. I’m standing in his open plan apartment near the bedroom door guarding it, and have entertaining views. There’s a DJ spinning tracks in the corner, tipsy people are either dancing away, kissing, getting hot and heavy, or snorting cocaine from the buffet of drugs laid on the table. A couple stroll past hand in hand toward another bedroom, and the girl winks at me cheekily. Every room is free except for Maverick’s bedroom which I’m guessing holds money, personal stuff he doesn’t want touched and so on.

  He seems like a nice enough guy so far. I accompanied him to a club earlier, having driven his sleek Ferrari. He was partying with actors and actresses I recognised, having the time of his life. Returning from the balcony, he strolls toward me and asks if I’m thirsty or hungry. I shake my head and thank him. At least he’s considerate and has manners unlike Thomas, who speaking of which, has requested my services tomorrow. I still can’t believe Amara has left him. It’ll be weird not seeing her around. My good mood plummets. I’m bothered by it more than I thought. Removing my mobile I open my messages and hover over her name. Is she holding up okay? She was devastated about that dog.

  Maverick reappears and holds out his hand for me to shake. When I do I feel several notes as he tips me generously.

  “I’ll be in here for a couple of hours,” he informs me, and motions for two babes to join him.

  I nod my head and slip my mobile in my pocket. Being friendly with Amara won’t do me any favours. Pissing Thomas off when he’s recently been dumped could be detrimental.

  It’s 5A.M when Maverick is done partying. Bodies are sprawled over the sofas, the floor, even on the balcony furniture, worn out and snoring. I can’t wait to get in bed. My body is aching and I can’t stop yawning. It’s broad daylight when I get outside and I wince at the bright sunlight. I don’t even play the music in my car fearful soft house or trance will make me fall asleep at the wheel.

  When I’ve made a microwaveable meal at home half an hour later and am eating it, my mobile pings. It’s Rhiann asking to meet again. I send a quick response about how I thought I was ready to date again, but I was wrong, and I wish her well for the future. It’s an asshole move, but I don’t want to string her along. As I continue to eat, spooning lasagna into my mouth with one hand, I swipe on a dating app with the other. The profiles are all the same, vain photographs in hardly any clothing, similar biographies, boring stuff. I don’t have the energy, but I am glad my mojo is back after the hook up with Rhiann. When I’ve finished eating I dump the plastic tray in the bin, quickly shower and get in bed.

  I groan in annoyance having gotten myself worked up, viewing all those women in bikinis. I need company. Lara springs to mind. She’s a stunning escort and mainly pleasures celebrities and high profile clients. We’ve slept together several times and after the first kinky session she never asked me to pay. I think she’d want something serious if I suggested it.

  “Elias Cortez. Haven’t heard from you in a while,” she purrs down the line.

  “You busy?” I get straight to it.

  “When it comes to you? Never.” She laughs and it sounds dirty and full of wicked intentions.

  “See you in an hour?”

  “I’ll be there.”

  ***

  My alarm bleeping seeps into my brain late afternoon. I yank the covers over my face, not yet ready to get up. Then I remember the arrangements I’d made with Lara and scramble out of bed. I check my mobile and find several missed calls from her. Shit. I must’ve been in a real deep sleep to not hear it vibrating. DeShawn has messaged asking me to workout and my mom has invited me over for dinner. I decline both telling them I have work and need to relax beforehand. My plan is to have a long, lazy soak in the bath and then eat food before the TV.

  Ambling to the bathroom I fill the tub and remove my boxers. As I wait, I sit on the toilet lid and scroll through my social media accounts on my mobile. Nothing of interest. My finger hovers over the search bar, desperate to type in Kaley’s name. It’s like an addiction. I know it’ll ruin my mood and I should stop myself, but force of habit has me studying her photographs. Once again it’s like a knife is being plunged right in my chest. Why did I fuck Rhiann? She’s nothing compared to Kaley. Nothing.

  Anger simmers in my veins, my nostrils flaring. I grind my teeth trying to hold in my tears of heartbreak. Putting my phone on the shelf beside my aftershaves, I lower myself in the bath and squeeze my eyes shut. I won’t get upset. I won’t be fucking weak.

  Grabbing my mobile again I blast a house playlist, the upbeat tunes taking me to a happier place. The times I partied. The times we partied. The good old days. I weakly grin at the memory. Then I s
ee the face of Amara and wonder what she does for fun. I whack the bottom of the tub, pissed off. Why is my brain torturing me today? I need to stop thinking of that woman. Perhaps I’m intrigued by her because I can’t have her. She’s off limits. Why do I always want what I can’t have? It’s exciting, thrilling. There was a time I really liked danger, the unknown. I’ve played it safe for too long now, no wonder I’m partly depressed. Where’s the old Elias Cortez? He only comes out when I fight. Where’s my happy, carefree side? I sink beneath the water, my chest lighter, and remember how she made me smile and laugh on my birthday. Amara, I groan inwardly. I need to call Lara again, to douse this arousal, this burning fire inside of me.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  AMARA

  I wave off the customer and close the front door, reacquainting myself with Lori. A yawn escapes and I tie up my messy waves. We’ve been baking all day and have sold six birthday cakes. Dropping onto the stool I rub at my eyes and grin.

  “We’ve had a productive day.”

  “Haven’t we just?” Lori beams.

  “Thank you for this.” I grab her hand and squeeze it. “If I keep on saving I’ll hopefully be able to rent a room in a shared house or something soon.”

  “Amara.” Lori bats my hand away in annoyance. “I like having you here. Besides, that bedroom was just gathering dust anyway.”

  “Well at least let me pay you some rent.”

  “No—”

  “Please,” I plead.

  With a heavy sigh, she shakes her head but agrees. “Okay. But not yet. Not until you’ve saved enough.”

  I scoop up some of my Victoria sponge cake along with squirty cream and eat it. It’s another cake we made and it’s delicious, the sponge moist and soft in my mouth, the strawberry jam tasty. When I’ve cleared my bowl my mobile rings, vibrating across the table. I check the screen and my shoulders sag. Thomas.

  “He still hasn’t gotten the hint?” Lori rolls her eyes. “What a prick.”